Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

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Lou Wrong said:
In my opinion the best was the one where they discovered a drug that turned you into a normal, socially interactive, person but made you totally unable to control a vehicle, susceptible to falling into a monthl-long incoherent daze and totally unable to know when you should stop taking said drug. It was like moths to a flame, they should have known better but they just couldn't stay away.
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You must be talking about "Joose", which was a shady "research chemical" from Russia. The best part was when the guy selling it on TCC was found dead on a park bench (if he OD'ed or was murdered was never made clear) and all the goony goons were like "Can I get in touch with his mother, I want my $200 back!"
 
I remember one of them randomly gave a bunch of Joose to some guys he met at a party one time, told them how to get more etc but totally didn't bother to tell them the stuff about how you should never ever up your dosage or it could kill you. Oh well...


edit: Bringing this stuff up now makes it sound like a throwaway episode on an ironic HBO sit-com but I swear to god its real, it all really happened.
 
BALLZ-BROKEN said:
You must be talking about "Joose", which was a shady "research chemical" from Russia. The best part was when the guy selling it on TCC was found dead on a park bench (if he OD'ed or was murdered was never made clear) and all the goony goons were like "Can I get in touch with his mother, I want my $200 back!"
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My personal favorite was the guy who was too fucked up on the joose to understand what "eyeballing it" meant.
 
The thing about Joose was it was an extremely powerful, but extremely slow acting benzo only available in a pure powder, and an effective dose was like .5mg. So goons would "eyeball" half a milligram of fine white powder, take it, and wait an hour and not feel anything. So they'd take another dose, wait around, and take another dose forgetting they re-dosed themselves and next thing they know it's 5 days later, they crashed their car, they lost their job, their parents disowned them, their girlfriend left them, and they bought a baby grand piano on Ebay and they first thing they post on TCC is "Where can I get more of that!?!"
 
TCC also has a steroid thread, in which goons inject random shit from Chinese online pharmacies to achieve sick gains like this:
K8SHdXj.png

It's a good forum
 
Those are bigger tits than you see in the tranny thread.

Maybe troons should switch to Chinese steroids instead of Chinese horse piss.
 
BALLZ-BROKEN said:
Those are bigger tits than you see in the tranny thread.

Maybe troons should switch to Chinese steroids instead of Chinese horse piss.
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Not like the body acne would be noticeable anyhow
 
Dynastia said:
It's not a shady research chemical, it's just what the east bloc uses as a pre-anaesthetic instead of medazelam.
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It might be a legit drug in a region where the Lada is considered an automobile and Vodka is what's for breakfast but buying an unidentifiable powder from a member of a tenbux internet forum is definitely what any non hotpocket would call "shady".
 
So what does it mean if a goon gets the 'infected' label and his posts all turn invisible until clicked? I thought you only got banned from there as punishment [so you give Lowtax money].
 
A Random said:
So what does it mean if a goon gets the 'infected' label and his posts all turn invisible until clicked? I thought you only got banned from there as punishment [so you give Lowtax money].
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There was a while where posting in certain forums would give you "Forums Cancer". These were all of the low-effort posting areas of SA (ironically also the funny parts of SA). Also a Lowtax cash grab.

People who post in the forums in the Retarded Forum for Assholes (Laissez's Faire, Your Console Sucks, and BYOB) are now infected with forums cancer. Symptoms of forums cancer include:

-A disturbing avatar that informs the user that they are infected
-Light text that darkens when you put the cursor over the post
-Redirection to a Ponyta flash video if you try and post outside of RFA

Someone infected with forums cancer can buy chemo for $6.95. This does not give immunity from future infections; the only way to stay cancer-free is to post outside of RFA.
 
Tanner Glass said:
There was a while where posting in certain forums would give you "Forums Cancer". These were all of the low-effort posting areas of SA (ironically also the funny parts of SA). Also a Lowtax cash grab.

People who post in the forums in the exceptional Forum for Assholes (Laissez's Faire, Your Console Sucks, and BYOB) are now infected with forums cancer. Symptoms of forums cancer include:

-A disturbing avatar that informs the user that they are infected
-Light text that darkens when you put the cursor over the post
-Redirection to a Ponyta flash video if you try and post outside of RFA

Someone infected with forums cancer can buy chemo for $6.95. This does not give immunity from future infections; the only way to stay cancer-free is to post outside of RFA.
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Jesus, the plethora of naked cash-grabs on that site. The posters who keep going for it sound like goddamned battered wives.
 
Alec Benson Leary said:
Jesus, the plethora of naked cash-grabs on that site. The posters who keep going for it sound like goddamned battered wives.
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Ahhh, this one isn't THAT bad. People who got forum cancer were usually really fucking bad posters who deserved it. Also because of the way the forums are coded, it never quite worked right and Cancer posters had their posts vaguely faded out, which really didn't stop you from reading them or anything.

I honestly never got the point of Forums Cancer, but I doubt it made Lowtax much money. Most Cancer posters took pride in the fact that they had Forums Cancer anyway. I'm also pretty sure they lifted the restriction on only posting on RFA pretty early, making cancer completely meaningless.


Edit: "Because of the way the forums are coded, it never quite worked right" should be the motto of SA.
 
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