Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

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Ghostse said:
The only thing I remember about goon jerky is they had extra-fatty trimmings for a lower cost and there was a mod (i think louisgod) who couldn't get enough and when they stopped offering those he had a bit of blimpout until they brought them back.

(for those not in the know, jerky 'works' by drying out the meat. This gives it a long shelf life, and anything that puts moisture back into the environment degrades how long the meat will last. High ammounts of fat in jerk will retain moisture and thus precipitiously affect shelf life, as well as run the odds that even if the meat doesn't spoil the fat will go racid (oxidize))

I still remember "Let me peep that chicken cheese" getting tons of reports and mod attention for "racism"
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Yeah, it was Louisgod. He was also the guy who cooked up the most disgusting looking steak for the keto thread with the word Hats written next to it.
 
I think the cute cats from this are now dead :(


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Ghostse said:
High ammounts of fat in jerk will retain moisture and thus precipitiously affect shelf life, as well as run the odds that even if the meat doesn't spoil the fat will go racid (oxidize))
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As in literally it will go bad within days at room temperature or even much sooner vacuum sealed, as compared to real jerky which can last nearly indefinitely if kept in even reasonably dry conditions.
 
Ghostse said:
The only thing I remember about goon jerky is they had extra-fatty trimmings for a lower cost and there was a mod (i think louisgod) who couldn't get enough and when they stopped offering those he had a bit of blimpout until they brought them back.
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Never tried it myself, but goon jerky is still a thing. Though the guy was recently talking about possibly closing the business.

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But maybe we'll see a fatty jerky renaissance now that Trump has decided to make Argentinian beef farmers great again?
 
I posted about his jerky earlier in this thread and the jerky quality is significantly worse than it was 20~ years ago. It might be cheaper than the gas station, but it's the same quality as the gas station. Back in the day it was so good I used to give the promotional bags they'd include to friends because they deserved the free marketing. This shows that he's likely had to cut corners over the years as well. So I think it's interesting he says the quality is better than ever?

That post makes me feel sad, I don't want his jerky to be bad and I don't want to see him shutter. I want to take him at his word... but I know whatever I get is gonna be mid.
 
Trollblade69 said:
What thread?
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People explaining the worst public restroom disasters they had ever witnessed, and someone talked about seeing an entire roll of TP, splayed across the entire floor of the room, completely covered in shit without a single sheet torn off.

Then someone illustrated the way they thought it could happen
 
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This guy has weird thoughts about how fandom works and is championing it as his "theory".

It's weird because this same guy came to a way saner conclusion about these types of people as just being grifters a month earlier:
doctorwhat.webp
 
I ended up ordering some Big John's beef jerky. It's okay. This batch is much better than the last batch I bought a few years ago. That particular order was just really dry, even by jerky standards. I'll likely end up giving most of this order away. If I'm going to destroy my body with nitrates, I'd rather eat a fancy pepperoni or even the grass fed beef sticks from Costco; there might be nitrate free options as far as either of those go.

Something I need to keep in mind is that I was a high school kid when I first tried this stuff. Rarely ever was able to travel other places and try different foods. I've been fortunate enough to travel globally and nationally for work and leisure and I guess maybe I have a more complicated palate than when I was a kid - as faggoty as that sounds. This same jerky probably WAS amazing to the teenage version of me. I will say (in contrast to my last post) that this order is better than gas station jerky.

I bought some of the fatty jerky even though I don't think I ever did before, it seems to be closer to what I remember the jerky being like back in the day before he specifically offered fatty jerky. Packaging was fine, I've never had an issue with spoilage, and the bags have always been air sealed.

TL;DR: This shit was great when I was a kid isolated in the suburbs. Today, there's just too many better options out there that don't have nitrates.
 
Paul Revere Pantry Raider said:
I had pretty much the same reaction. Back in the earlier 2000s, that jerky was amazingly awesome. I ordered some around 2018 and it was just awful. I then read soemwhere on the website that he lost his sense of taste.

I wouldn't buy it again.
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There is something very on-brand for a goon to lose his sense of taste, yet continue selling food products anyway.

It is very much in the Lowtax spirit.
 
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