Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

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millais said:
In middle school, one time they assembled all the students in the gym to hear a guest lecture by a Holocaust survivor about how his experience in the camps. At the end of the lecture, he took questions from the students, and this one notoriously dumb Arab kid straight up asked "How did you feel when your family all died?"
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He was no dumber than most TV journalists are when they show up on the scene of a tragedy.
 
millais said:
In middle school, one time they assembled all the students in the gym to hear a guest lecture by a Holocaust survivor about how his experience in the camps. At the end of the lecture, he took questions from the students, and this one notoriously dumb Arab kid straight up asked "How did you feel when your family all died?"

The old guy was so outraged that he couldn't even express himself, and they had to cut the presentation short because of it.
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Damn it, with him being Arab I was really hoping for a split second he said "The holocaust didn't happen JEW!"

Anyway for my highschool we had people having sex on the stairways. Now when I say stairs I don't mean the main stairs obviously, I mean the back one off the side that is a alternate route so you don't have to travel across the building. They were rarely traveled during class, but they were still used a little bit even when it was quiet.

These dumbasses would have sex there instead of in their car in the student parking lot, or hell the bathroom would have been a better place. I can understand playing grab ass or making out back there, I made out with my GF at the time there once when school was out, but having sex on stairs? No thank you.

It wasn't just one really trashy couple either. Multiple trashy couples had sex there. It was always ugly ass people too, the teachers or students never caught any decent looking human beings back there.
 
Lackadaisy said:
In college, I sat there while this cute guy talked about programming and computer algorithms nonstop at me for two hours. It was at that point I realized he was almost certainly autistic.
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In my case I sat on the phone with the guy until maybe 3 in the morning as he told me about being religious and some friend of his who was a druggie, and how he loved Jesus.
 
This year, a junior at my school took a shit in a cup, seran-wrapped the top, and put it in a teacher’s desk. Some poor kid in my grade went to get something from the desk and found the shit cup. Apparently the teacher whos desk it was in wasn’t even the intended recipient too. There aren’t any cameras at the teacher area, so no one knew who did it until he started bragging about it, nothing happened to him as far as I know despite teachers & students knowing about him.
 
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Sorry for the double post, besides the shit cup I couldn't remember anything else until now. This'll also probably be long, sorry in advance lmao.

-My freshman & senior year health teacher was an experience. We learned more about her family + her home life than we did about health, we learned stories such as how her tailbone was cracked by one of her babies when she was giving birth, and how her husband likes to feel up her tits in a crowded elevator. Another highlight was her lesson about douching where she pulled one out of a cabinet and sprayed it all over the class, kids were screaming and it was utter chaos. By far the best was the condom lesson, she whipped a dildo out of a desk drawer and slapped it on the closest desk. The lesson took about an hour because of how many different condoms she had in her desk.

-There's a girl in my grade who's most likely at least a little exceptional. We had gym together, and I was injured by her more than once. During the soccer unit I was standing by the goal "defending" (I'm not exactly very athletic haha) and I'm looking off when I hear someone yell across on the other side of the field. Turns out its her, screaming at the top of her fucking lungs before kicking the ball down the field, directly into my face. She's also kicked me multiple times due to not looking while practicing her karate moves to anime openings. The best was how she'd chimp out if people called her by her full name. If it's the first day of school and a teacher calls her by the name on her roster, she loses it. She's also got a youtube channel where she records herself in her room reacting to movie trailers.

-My school is an open planned and doesn't have walls, only dividers between most classes (leading to things such as garlic bread one time being flung over them) and a classroom thats a literal hole in the floor called the pit. Our senior prank was to fill the pit with balloons, and everyone loved it. About a period in teachers starting stopping kids going in because kids were cutting class, and by the period after lunch the pit was surrounded by teachers screaming at kids to get out of it, and any balloon spotted going past the pit was considered contraband and had to be thrown back in.

-Due to the open plan of my school, smells tend to spread. The worst was when someone left a salad with chicken in their locker over spring break, and because of the shitty ac the school was super hot. We get back to school and this awful fucking smell starts spreading. At the start of second period the school is evacuated & the fire department was called because the smell was thought to be a gas leak, but nah just some fucking chicken.

-To finish off some other noticeable people in my school were a girl who says she talks to her dead Nazi grandparents, a girl who's "media center personnel" and goes apeshit if anyone breaks a rule in the library, a boy who stuck a paperclip in an electrical socket and gave some girl burns after it sparked, a boy who was probably exceptional who lunged across the hall + grabbed my hair without letting go after I waved at him (haha thats what i get for being nice!), and a girl who shit her pants in the middle of class during a 7th grade math class.
 
StarfishDestroyer2 said:
There was this one day where I managed to sleep the entire school period, it felt like Black Heaven in there.
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I was never able to sleep during school, even though I was often tired and wanted to. The desks were always either dirty or smelled like this nasty cleanser. Besides, teachers would get on your case if you put your head down, even if you were done the classwork.

One day a kid died of a heart attack or something (not at school) The school sent in therapists and allowed people to skip class if they either went to an area to grieve as a group, or to sit in the office. I didn't even know the dead guys name, but I went to the office and was told I could lie down at a desk. It smelled like that nasty cleaner spray, but at least I got out of Math class.
 
Second week of my freshman year in high school started off on a shitty note. I had a seizure during the last class of the day and had to be sent from school to the nearest hospital via ambulance. The people who witnessed it claimed that I had started rambling about how "I loved everyone" or something to that effect.

Speaking of seizures, during my senior year a student suffered a grand mal seizure and collapsed during one of my classes. A bunch of students who sat near her immediately shrieked when it happened, and since I sat on the opposite end of the room and couldn't see what was going on, I thought someone had seen a rat crawling around. The teacher called 911 and we then moved to a nearby computer lab so the EMTs could do their job. Thankfully, she recovered and was able to return to class a few days later.
 
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I went middle school I had a whole group of 16 year old boys that were all a solid foot taller than the rest of my class. They were in the sixth grade with me and they all stayed back so they could keep playing middle school basketball because our coach/ gym teacher told them to so his team would have the advantage (he was also a massive creep that drilled a hole in his office wall because the girls locker room was next door to him). These guys were also extremely obnoxious, they developed massive egos because they took our school to state and all the teachers passed them without making them do any work and they also tried to fuck a lot of 12 year old girls. Needless to say they weren't very popular with the other students in the school. Hilariously enough by the time we entered high school they completely lost the advantage they had in middle school and they weren't able to keep up with the other players on the high school team, and because of that teachers didn't give them special treatment anymore. It was pretty common to hear them sitting in the hallways whining loudly about how unfair everything was or literally crying that the coaches hated them and let the other players cheat to be better than them. After everyone graduated half of them are unemployed and the ones that do have jobs have actually mellowed out considerably.

My history teacher in high school was also married to my math teacher. She was one of the players on his volleyball team and they started having an affair when she was 16 and he was 25, and they finally got married when she graduated and found out she was preggors. She was a nice lady, he was a massive cunt.
 
I've mostly had a lot of unmemorable experiences at school. The only thing of any interest that ever happened when I was at high school was a few people died from drunk driving, and a guy I knew and had child psychology classes with ended up raping, murdering and dismembering a five year old near where I live. The local news had mentioned my school was going to offer advanced counseling to people that knew him, but when I asked about it they basically told me to fuck off because they didn't have time for shit like that because the school year was just starting and their number one priority was signing people up for their classes.
 
My high school had a retired boxer come in as a guest speaker. He talked to us for an hour about his drug abuse and how it fucked up his boxing career. When it was over, one of the kids from student council walked up to the mic and said, and I quote: "Thank you for coming in today and speaking to us about the seriosity of drug addiction."

Seriosity.

I did not go to a good school.
 
Monsieur Guillotine said:
"Thank you for coming in today and speaking to us about the seriosity of drug addiction."
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When I was in highschool, we had the opportunity to do job shadowing. I was 'working' in a gradeschool that had an attached area for pre-K. The idea was that the FOB ESL kids would get a chance to hear English and interact with other kids, and their parents would get a chance to relax and maybe create connections between people outside their own cultural group.

The POC leader who I was shadowing got the kids in a circle and started singing the Hokey Pokey song - "put your feets in".

This same person got all WTF on me when she started singing the childhood classic "one little, two little, three little" and I said "Indians" instead of "children". Like, sorry I didn't get that PC-memo. I'm part Native too.
 
In first grade, I had a run-in with a menacing-looking kid on the playground. I was sitting there drawing in a tiny sketchbook, when he walked up to me, unprokoved. He saw that I was drawing and decided he had to weigh in on it.

"What are you doing? Drawing?" I was too nervous to answer him. "That's stupid, nobody likes drawing." I was sure he was going to get physical with me, until he added "You should write stories about yourself, like your life, so people can learn more about you!" He reiterated his original point. "Nobody cares about drawing, that's stupid. Write about yourself!"

Then he got in real close, and this is the part I'll never forget: "And if you don't...

... I'll kill you."

Of course, young me didn't understand nuance so I started to write a quick bio out of fear, but now that I'm older, I can appreciate how fucking bizarre that encounter was.
 
Monsieur Guillotine said:
In first grade, I had a run-in with a menacing-looking kid on the playground. I was sitting there drawing in a tiny sketchbook, when he walked up to me, unprokoved. He saw that I was drawing and decided he had to weigh in on it.

"What are you doing? Drawing?" I was too nervous to answer him. "That's stupid, nobody likes drawing." I was sure he was going to get physical with me, until he added "You should write stories about yourself, like your life, so people can learn more about you!" He reiterated his original point. "Nobody cares about drawing, that's stupid. Write about yourself!"

Then he got in real close, and this is the part I'll never forget: "And if you don't...

... I'll kill you."

Of course, young me didn't understand nuance so I started to write a quick bio out of fear, but now that I'm older, I can appreciate how fucking bizarre that encounter was.
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This fine young man seems helpful in the most delightfully aggressive way possible. He'd make a damn fine therapist in my opinion. Nothing screams "change for the better" like some deranged guy threatening your life if you don't.
 
I guess I can share another story, but this time it involves a friend of my brother’s (he had a shit load of weird friends due to autism flocking his way, due to his hobbies being an autism magnet).

So there was this weird kid who used to hang out with my younger brother all the time; he was tall, had a Jew for, horrible acne, overweight and spoke in a really monotone, slow voice that you’d usually hear from someone on the lower end of the autism spectrum. He also had droopy eyes and waddled whenever he walked... oh and he fancied himself as a solar dragon or some shit like that. And he claimed to have psychic powers and could bring people back to life with said powers. And he claimed that the Military was looking for him because of his psychic powers (note: his dad was in the military, I suspect he got this idea from possibly being brought to a Padre... a military psychiatrist).

Anyways, this kid used to drink at least three cans of monster and claimed that he “needed energy” to... walk around town? He didn’t have a job, and whatever one he was given he would find a way to screw it up before the end of his 90 days.

At one point, he claimed that I was the reincarnation of some solar priestess who was able to control the solar dragon through my body or some shit like that. Needless to say, I was pretty creeped out by it as was my brother; which was when he stopped talking to him.
 
In elementary school me and my friends got in trouble for making guns and swords with building blocks because they said we were "promoting school violence" and they had an announcement the next day claiming that anything that promoted weapon violence in school was strictly prohibited.

Fucking faggots.
 
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