Shanties Without Panties - Gunt Parody Song Thread - Submissions Welcome

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This parody is about Rekieta. Sometimes, you need to involve and shift focus from one lolcow to another. I was an honor aloging Ralph through my parodies for the past three years. I can confidently say that there are only three or four songs, a compilation album and 3 lps left before I close the chapter on Ralph parodies. People are free to use Ralph's voice AI to cover the songs with proper credits.

Modern Cuck
Parody of Modern Love by David Bowie
Written by Cal Rollia

(Intro)
I know when to pedo guard
And when to act dumb
And get things done

(Verse 1)
I became the cleanup boy
But things don't really change
I'm more soy than Ron toye
But I never wave bye-bye
I try
Oh I Try

(Verse 2)
My marriage is on the rocks
My viewers are in the slumps
I'm more soy than Ron toye
But I never wave bye-bye
I try
Oh I Try


(Chorus)
My coomer takes makes me (A Modern Cuck)
Bottles shoved beside me (A modern Cuck)
Rectum broken (A Modern Cuck)
Got sued by monty and have to appeal on time (appeal on Time)
Literally marvel (appeal on Time)
My hairline receding (appeal on Time)
Tarnish my integrity as a fraud & man
No convictions (fraud & man)
Alcohol addiction (fraud & Man)
I guess that makes me a modern cuck

(Verse 3)
I'm not a whitebread nigga
My viewers are in the slumps
I'm more soy than Ron toye
But I never wave bye-bye
I try
Oh I Try

(Chorus)
My coomer takes makes me (A Modern Cuck)
Bottles shoved beside me (A modern Cuck)
Rectum broken (A Modern Cuck)
Got sued by monty and have to appeal on time (appeal on Time)
Literally marvel (appeal on Time)
My hairline receding (appeal on Time)
Tarnish my integrity as a fraud & man
No convictions (fraud & man)
Alcohol addiction (fraud & Man)
I guess that makes me a modern cuck

(Bridge)
(Modern cuck) bottles shoved beside me
(Modern cuck) Rectum Broken
(Modern cuck) have to appeal on time
Modern cuck) Literally marvel
(Modern cuck) My hairline Receding
As a fraud and man
(Modern cuck) no convictions
(Modern cuck) Alcohol addiction
(Modern cuck) makes me a modern cuck

(Outro)
Modern cuck, Modern cuck, Modern cuck
Modern cuck
Modern cuck, Modern cuck,Modern cuck, Modern cuck
Modern cuck
Modern cuck (bottles shoved beside me) Modern cuck
Modern cuck (Rectums Broken) Modern Cuck
Modern cuck (bottles shoved beside me) Modern cuck
Modern cuck (Rectums Broken) Modern Cuck
My coomer takes makes me (A Modern Cuck)
(Modern cuck, Modern cuck, Modern cuck, Modern cuck)

 
Merry Christmas everyone

Last guntmas
Last Christmas by Wham
Written by Cal Rolla

(Chorus)
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away
This year, to save me from seethe
I'll give it to a pedo
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away (you ran away)
This year, to save from seethe
I'll give it to my Noble steed (steed)

(Verse 1)
Once gunted and twice thumbed
without compression socks my legs are numb
So Tell me faifai, do you know who I Am?
Well for fucks sake, I might as well choke you
"Merry Christmas" you took my son away from me and pantsu
Playing with me like this is sun tzu
Now I know you are a cheat
But I got manstu now to love my micro ween

(Chorus)
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away (you ran away)
This year, to save from seethe
I'll give it to may who's a Noble steed (steed)
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away
This year, to save me from seethe
I'll give it to may who's a Noble steed (steed)
Oh, Oh baby

(Verse 2)
A crowded shack, inlaws with pointed knives
Ready to strike, skin full of hives
My god, pantsu, why does your family hates me
Oh, well I must go on a doxxing spree
A face of a rage pig with shit on his thumb
A failed radio host has urn of my mom
Oh, oh I'll marry you in spite
And live our lives in Yucatan's slum

(Chorus)
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away (you ran away)
This year, to save from seethe
I'll give it to my Noble steed (steed))

(Chorus)
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away (you ran away)
This year, to save from seethe
I'll give it to my Noble steed (steed)
Last guntmas I gave you my seed
The very next day you ran away
This year, to save me from seethe
I'll give it to a my Noble steed (steed)

(Verse 3)
A face of a rage pig with shit on his thumb
(I gave my seed)
A failed radio host has urn of my mom
Maybe next reroll

(Outro)
I'll give it to a
Il give it to a
Pedo
Pedo
May is a...pedooo

 
Guntaches by the number
Heartaches by the number
By Guy Mitchell

Guntaches by the number
Troubles by the score
Every day, you love me less
Each day I hate you more
Yes, I've got Guntaches by the number
A love that I can't win
But the day that I stop counting
That's the day my world will end


Guntaches number one was when you left me
I never knew that I could hurt this way
And Guntaches number two
Was when you came back again
You came back but never meant to stay


Yes, I've got Guntaches by the number
Troubles by the score
Every day, you love me less
Each day I hate you more
Yes, I've got Guntaches by the number
A love that I can't win
But the day that I stop counting
That's the day my world will end


Guntaches number three
Was when you called me
And said that you were serving me
With scornful heart
I waited for the servers knock on the door
I waited, but then I fell asleep


Yes, I've got Guntaches by the number
Troubles by the score
Every day, you love me less
Each day I hate you more
Yes, I've got Guntaches by the number
A love that I can't win
But the day that I stop counting
That's the day my world will end
 
Gunterball

parody of Thunderball theme performed by Tom Jones

He's always drunk while other watch
He naps while other guests just talk
He thinks that his vice is worth it all
So he cries like gunterball

He knows the meaning of sex pest
He fled down south to foil arrest
He thinks of his girl and wants to bawl
So he cries like gunterball

Any pussy he wants he’ll get
He’ll thumb her ass without regret

His days of seething are all done
His fights goes on on and on
He shook the first world and wants to bawl
So he cries
Like gunt ter ball

 
A masterpiece I spent a year and a half to perfect. I hope you guys enjoy.

Mr Jim
Parody of Mr Jones by counting crows
Written by cal Rollia

Sha-la-la-la-la
Mhm

(Verse 1)
I was reminising about gamergate
Staring at that beautiful Korean girl
Mr. Jim strikes up a conversation
With a cigarette, with a infectious laugh
You know ,that waifu is fetching
She was suddenly so based
We want something to be so based
Man I wish I was so based


(Verse 2)
stream and shout about ethics of gaming through the morning
Sha-la-la-la
Mhm
Cut up, Jarbo
Show me where that pesky Quinn flagged you
And put me on stream, Mr Jim
Believe in me
Help me believe in anything
'Cause i want to believe in something based
Yeah

(Chorus)
Mr Jim & me
Laughing at ragepigs & lolcows
and we stare at them beautiful women
She's uwuing at you, oh no she's uwuing at me
Smiling at the bright lights
Coming with a 20 dollar superchat
When everybody loves you
You can never be lonely

(Verse 3)
Well I'm gon' to get on a forum & glow
Glow in colors of blue and red and green and grey
All of them are so very, very, very based and redpilled
Yeah, well Green is is my favorite color
I felt so Trad yesterday
If I knew trump
I tell him to tweet #gamergate & play

(Chorus)
Mr Jim & me
Warning about Corona-chan
and we stare at them beautiful women
She's uwuing at you, oh no she's uwuing at me
Smiling at the bright lights
I bought myself merch from kiwi
When everybody loves my parody
I can never be lonely

[Post-chorus)
I can never be lonely
Said, im never going to be lonely

(Bridge)
I suddenly want to be a lawyer
But I don't wanna place a bottle between my ass
We all, want to be big, big ecelebs
Yeah we got different reasons for that
Believe in me
And I want to believe in something based
To believe, to believe
Yeah

(Chorus)
Mr Jim and me
Stumbling to kino casino
Yeah, we stare at beautiful women
She's perfect for you
Man, there's gotta be a waifu for me
I wanna be weird al
Mr Jim wants to be
Someone more healthy
When everybody loves you
Oh son, that's just as healthy I can be
Mr. Jim and me
When I see a bloodsport I wanna see you rooting for me
Staring right back at me
We all want to be big big ecelebs
But when everyone likes my parody
I wanna be as happy I can be
 
Tipped the cow
Parody of Take a Walk by Passion Pit
Written by Cal Rollia & @Needless

(Verse 1)
All these kinds of fourms make it seem it's been ages
Spreg all day and night on a dopamine high
I love this sector dearly
If my sock didn't glow so cearly
I could've been better being sly
On discord gay operations to the gunt board's degradation
We were alone my e-whore, and I
But then my poor kiddo ghosted me
No bourbon tour for her
Now I alog a rage pig and his horse bride

(Pre-chorus)
sending over ten thousand messages to others on poa.st
and now, with my unbridled autism undiagnosed
I tip the cow

(Chorus)
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, Tipped the cow Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, Tipped The cow
Ohhh
I tipped the cow
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, tipped the cow
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, tipped the cow (oohhh)

(Verse 2)
Upcummies don't come easy
With shzio post comes a loss
I remind myself of times
could be much worse
My e-whore doesn't ask questions
There's not much to ask
She won't come home without orbiters
Once i got my dono read by the casino that night
You could say it was the biggest moment of my life
I doomscroll X to see if my content got engagement
And sit and pray my children won't ask who's Nick the Knife

(Pre-chorus)
But then my Boss
Called to say I've haven't been here for weeks
My cow just ran to Mexico so please don't be a ween
I tipped the cow

(Chorus)
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, Tipped the cow Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, Tipped The cow
Ohhh
I tipped the cow
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, tipped the cow
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, tipped the cow (oohhh)

Honey, it's your son I think I've alogged a little too much
I've been coping and praying because my email got doxxed.
Now my audience of alogs have turned their backs on me
Now I'm panicking going on dfe
We rip apart the groypers and all of their catboys
But you see I'm just a spreg, on both bad knees
I'm too much of a coward to admit I pozloaded my neghole
I tipped the cow

(Chorus)
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, Tipped the cow Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, Tipped The cow
Ohhh
I tipped the cow
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, tipped the cow
Tipped the cow, tipped the cow, tipped the cow (oohhh)

 
Particle Bored said:
To the tune of "Last Kiss," by J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers:

Oh where oh where can my Maker’s be?
That Ford took it away from me
It’s in the carpet of my mangled car
I gotta have my Maker’s as I seethe at the Farms

I was out on the road to meet with Jacob Wohl
He was eager to sample my tender hole
When there on my phone, on Zero Hedge
Another piece by Null, ya know he diddles kids

I screamed and cursed as my face turned red
Same as the traffic light straight ahead
I reached for the bottle, foot on the gas
And in that moment we both were smashed

Oh where oh where can my Maker’s be?
That Ford took it away from me
It’s in the carpet of my mangled car
I gotta have my Maker’s as I seethe at the Farms

When my gunt had finally settled down
I desperately searched all around
Something warm flowin' between my thighs
But I found my bottle, barely an ounce inside

I threw back my head, and with slurred words I said
"You’re the only thing that makes me smile!"
I held it close, I slurped up one last sip
I let out a shart as it dripped from my lips
And now it’s gone, but I know it’s alright
I’ll pick up another bottle tonight

Oh where oh where can my Maker’s be?
That Ford took it away from me
It’s in the carpet of my mangled car
I gotta have my Maker’s as I seethe at the Farms
Click to expand...
 
Rage Pig by ChatGPT (not bad)

Verse 1) There's a man in town, known as a rage pig, Gets mad at the internet, throws a big fit, With every tweet and post, he's ready to brawl, Swigging back alcohol, he's ready to fall.

(Chorus) He's a rage pig, oh what a sight, Drinking and raging through the night, With every click and tap, his fury ignites, Leaving chaos and bruises in his wake, oh what a plight!

(Verse 2) His family cowers when he's in his rage, His fists clenched tight, like a lion in a cage, He screams at the screen, filled with anger and spite, His loved ones tremble, praying for the night.

(Chorus) He's a rage pig, a monster untamed, Leaving destruction wherever he's aimed, With each slur and punch, he leaves scars, His anger a wildfire, burning through bars.

(Bridge) But deep down inside, there's a broken soul, Lost in the chaos, trying to gain control, But the internet's grip is too strong to resist, Turning him into a beast, clenched fist by clenched fist.

(Chorus) He's a rage pig, a creature of wrath, Leaving a trail of destruction in his path, But behind the anger, there's pain to be seen, In the eyes of the rage pig, lost in the screen.

(Outro) So here's to the man, trapped in his rage, May he find peace, turn a new page, For the internet's fury is a dangerous game, Turning a man into a rage pig, with no one to blame.
 
Screenshot_20240511_161210_Chrome.jpg
 
Just for one night
Parody of one headlight by the wallflowers
Written by Cal Rollia ft. @Associate Rick
Sung by @BooferScooper

[Verse 1]
So long ago, I can't recall the facts
That's when they say I lost my Rumble contract
Well they said my Locals died cause of a horny wine mom crowd
As I stumbled through a whiskey induced cloud

[Verse 2]
I saw my career went up and down being outdrawn
By youtubers who have practiced real law
It always seemed like they adored, I raked in cash for every pour
Now I wonder why they don't hang around no more


[Chorus]
He-ey-ey
Watch my viewers shrivel
Donos down forever
Gotta be something better than a dodged missile
Me and manderilla
We can swing together
We can put the balldo on

(Replace one headlight once we find the replacement.)

[Verse 4]
She said, "It's cool, it sometimes happens when you're sick"
But I can't deny it's the whiskey dick
And there's got to be some help for me
Some escape from cuckoldry
Been through this maze of hedonism & Sneed

March 13 2024 12:30pm

(Verse 5)
haven't seen the sun after burning the lawtube bridge
Safe to say that my marriage & career is dead
I wished a million dollars till out of breath
Disgruntled Fans unsubbed to defect
Locals shit the bed, just like the prizes I've pledged

(Chorus)
He-ey-ey
Watch my viewers shrivel
Donos down forever
Gotta be something better than a dodged missile
Me and manderilla
We can swing together
We can put the balldo on
For just one night

[Verse 6]
I don't wanna do my show
I feel like a beat up Rectum
I turn on the donos but the donos doesn't glow
I reek of cheap whiskey and cigarettes
My life feels I'm living with such regret
Sometimes I think I'd like to watch it burn


[Verse 7]
I'm so alone, and I feel just like somebody else
Man, I ain't changed, but I know I ain't the same
But somewhere here in between
Inside this vault of coping streams
I think this drinking must be killing me

(Chorus)
Hey, hey, heyyyyy
Watch my viewers shrivel
Donos down forever
Gotta be something better than a dodged missile
Me and manderilla
We can swing together
We balldo on
For just one night

https://youtu.be/4nIohoeShIA?si=aM64iXOO_jHR0A77
 
1719778002028.jpg
Whimsicaltrolli presents
"Welcome to the troll toll"

A compilation album of his great works over the 3 years of parody writing with 4 new tracks. Release date: fall 2024.
 
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