random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CatParty]

First off, I'm 28. Second off all, I got a global 3 month ban for posting King Trump's electoral map on /v/, so I couldn't even post there if I could! Dumb stupid fucking nigger /v/ mods...

 

[Power Armor]

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fluffies.4981/page-2#post-347336

"But Daisy was a big fluffy, just like her mama, so she fought as hard as her tiny body would allow until she could no longer feel any of her leggies."

 

[ColumbiaBinks]

"LORD OF MORDOR, SHE'S ONLY SEVEN! WHY WOULD SHE FIND ONE OF HER TOYS SEXY?"
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=5cma6iojg5o27puhulc24sje&page=518#12946

"General audiences are stooopid potatoes. They like shitty movies."
http://thehypedgeek.com/hollywood-unashamedly-blames-critics-baywatch-pirates-5-failure/

"No wonder Chris loves My Little Pony. The open ceremony looks like Sesame Street Live could show up at any moment."
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-9

"Here’s a non-comprehensive list of things that Sausage Party tried to pass off as jokes. There are a lot of spoilers here, but fuck you, I’m not a paid reviewer. I can spoil whatever the fuck I want, just like you spoiled my fucking faith in the cinematic industry."
http://cookinguptales.tumblr.com/po...e-from-sausage-party-now-and-im-just-soso/amp

 

[Jewelsmakerguy]

got this as a response in the Mister Metokur thread. Trimmed to highlight the, well... "highlights" (There aren't much):

Its literally a group of Marxist Jews, and their pets, who have been waiting until their control of the internet was near total

As long as a bunch of Jews with spare change and a blatant, public hatred of European White Christians are allowed to operate, this will keep happening.

 

[Power Armor]

"The joys of dragon dildos cannot be expressed in words; they must be experienced."

"hello hacker fucker this is matt furniss. heres the deal. if you hack this game i will find you where ever you are and break your legs

and thats a promise"

 

[Sammy]

Jesus son of Joseph did not have a jet pack nor did he have a helmet and pressurized suit.

 

[Florence]

"We then had sex on the fabled Sonic the Hedgehog blanket, and it was good."

 

[ColumbiaBinks]

"Who fucked my cake?!" Pinkie started to froth, dancing about as her eyes roamed the room for the culprit. "It was a poor, innocent cake! It couldn't have said no, it was a cake! It was uncakesensual!"
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/11251180/1/MMMolestation-on-the-Friendship-Express

 

[BILLY MAYS]

i am a Normal inflationist, i make inflations for comedy and kawaii purposes, never for sexual or pervert purposes, and not to offend anyone, i am a inflator comedian.

tbh anyone claiming to be a "normal inflationist" should be gassed

 

[Sammy]

"We then had sex on the fabled Sonic the Hedgehog blanket, and it was good."

jfc that "article." the accompanying picture.

 

[Big Nasty]

He did openly fart in court with no repurcussions though.

 

[Antipathy]

Remember kids, don't be a furry, because then the magical shit leprechaun will crawl up your snatch and you'll become pregnant.

 

[Philosophy Zombie]

@Null: fuck my ass :---DDD

 

[Gordon Cole]

Spoons have no money, only yummy dishes to dig into. Today's dish is "trolling".

Too insane to realize what a joke is and too fat to put in the effort to look up what a joke or a troll is.

Unleash your autism shurikens, kiwi ninjas. The only thing that can stop me is a powerful blast of unknown reality, and I'm all for it.

 

[A Skeleton]

jfc that "article." the accompanying picture.
View attachment 268024

he's a troon now too (inactive but I lost his Twitter link)

how does he not have a thread here

 

[D. Sweatshirt]

"I will take ANY test that is FREE."

From the Ketchup thread.

 

[Antipathy]

Well. It's good to know that when the China/U.S. WW3 showdown does finally happen, it will be a slow-motion battle of fapping fatties.

 

[A Ghost]

"I thought you used facts, and just didn't make up really bad shit that could possibly ruin peoples lives. Was that a really dumb assumption?
Is this where people come to get their lives ruined?"
from the BSV thread

 

[Darwin Watterson]

https://twitter.com/TrueShawnJames/status/897121586100060161

 

[Reynard]

"I was gently assaulted by a negro man..."