random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CaddestSlown]

My brother, I'm 30 fucking pages behind but I can't just let this shit sit, you needed to be told what her department even does and then called yourself a sapiosexual, all you want her to rule with an iron fist is your nutsack.

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

Idk about you, but I've never found myself in a situation where I had to discuss anything with someone named "cunnyfeet" in an amicable manner, so forgive me if I'm being too harsh on our local catgirl enthusiast.

joke's on you, i was not pretending to be retarded

You will Patpost and you will enjoy it, child.

Nah ignore me I suck cocks that graph showed the opposite of what I thought (therefore their methodology is completely wrong).

And that kids, is why you don't use the same username everywhere. You never know if you can get exposed as a weird incest fetishist that might be into drawings of little anime girls

Or just don't be attracted to children. How hard is that?

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

My source? I made it up. @ me when I'm proven to be right. I will be.

 

[TheArtilleryman]

With no link being produced and she finally realizing she got taken, she rage-made the ambrosia salad.

 

[Oliver Onions]

I wonder if Stand Up to Cancer is going to be able to collect that $100 from the IAN HATES NIGGERS foundation?

 

[Meat Target]

You shouldn't have to de-jew your fucking car, but here we are.

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

Hot dogs are the best food to eat in the bath, in fact hot dogs are the best food to eat anywhere. You can keep hot dogs in your pocket, you can eat them on the toilet, you can even eat them at a table. If you're waiting in line at the DMV it's always good to make sure you have hot dogs in your pocket in case you get peckish.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I can colonize her.

Now India gets nuked 6 times. I see no downside.

this year has barely started and he is already harassing hookers

I was just installing some weeb gacha game from the app store and I saw that the reddit app is now promoting itself as "the #1 trusted news app in America."

Jesus fucking Christ.

kiwifarms is, unironically and with 100% sincerity the most diverse place on the Internet.

So what you're saying is that the Mahabharata is actually an historical account of the finno-korean hyperwar?

You know, we do appreciate you being here, but it is acceptable now and again to have an unexpressed thought.

This based gook is 100% right.

Dammit, when will I learn NOT to eat while I'm reading here?

I hope the glowniggers leak your gay porn stash

cant wait for the "can you beat Dark Souls on Switch in a single Armtrak ride while Tyrone pleasures your wife?!" challenge videos

You can safely ignore literally anything that begins with "As a communist"

 

[The Taxman]

>finally manage to summon a succubus
>get some bitch in a Steve Jobs turtleneck that keeps asking you to invest in her startup

 

[Crex Crex]

I'm a single digit IQ Nazi simp and I think we should nuke israel

 

[Gog & Magog]

"I introduced myself, her name was [redacted]. She was from an affluent part of the area, [redacted]. She had been using drugs. I told her to get a grip on herself. I mean, I imagined that she may have prostituted herself or something, to get the drugs. Eventually I told her, "you can't be here for anything worse than my charge; I’m here for murder.” [redacted] started bawling again, perhaps worse than before. [redacted] was in for bestiality. [redacted] was staying in [redacted] with her dope dealer and he had videotaped her having sex with dogs. The entire police force had probably seen the videos, were talking about the videos and some were giving her a rough time. The inmates weren't any better, with their jibes and barking. [redacted] was the first woman I met with bestiality charges but far from the last."

 

[Jang Joo]

yes my EYE key !s st!ll unrespons!ve, dec!ded to use exclamat!ons wh!ch are just fl!pped as confus!ng as !t may be.

 

[Pedophobe]

They just have to be special at all costs, don't they?

 

[Maki Harukawa]

... would you like me to spread my VAGINA for you ?

to shut you up?

cause I will

I can't imagine our Null saying such things. It would take at least ten more citations to convince me.

 

[Metamorpho]

Agent Smith was right - the summer of 2001 was the peak of human civilization.

 

[⚞⛇⚟]

not listening to this bc it might hypnotize me into transitioning

 

[Sultan Bin Jewstar]

"Racist daredevil K.K. Kinevil attempts to jump 50 pajeets with a tractor"

 

[Hostile Takeover]

"Begging for money and acting like I'm destitute are two completely different things"

Quote from DSP.

 

[Rembrandt]

Giving birth makes you retarded in unexpected ways.

 

[Crex Crex]

Pissflation is a bitch...

English hamburger killer

Following a pregnancy scare in which a mifepristone cocktail allowed her to "crap" their son out (to use his words), they were exclusively doing anal.

"This page is mostly for public urination."

Never been a better time to become a digital prostitute.

Do you really want to see a rotund, sobbing, depressed woman being used as a urinal while her holes get destroyed by an anatomically exaggerated rainbow coloured rubber fist? @Dawdler think about it.