random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Drip Torch]

After fizzling out on my autonomous helicopter flight systems development project, I realized that I would need to find a new personal project that allowed me to engage in a little bit of serial killarism and a little bit of cannibalism with a splash or a sprinkle of psychotic behaviors, and I wanted to be able to use my skills as a computer programmer in the whole thing and so I went out for a colonic to give it a consideration and the answer just came to me in a flash and it was to go learn to be a forex bot developer.

Basically I was divinely inspired.

 

[Space Police]

Too many troonjaks keeping them from attention-whoring with other likeminded troons.

 

[Sneeds]

fuck orange cats. they're literally the woke twitter autist of the cat world

 

[Overly Serious]

No Niles, one does not simply backpack into Mordor

 

[Mr Bunny]

Drugs are always easier though.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

trannies to the left of me, dickgirls to the right
here I am, stuck on the twitter with Wu

 

[Instant_Pot_User]

I could be shoulder-deep in primo lawyer pussy, 24/7, but I prefer to use my penis for religious reasons. Also, I don't fuck lawyers, again for religious reasons.

 

[Cemetery Support]

From Danielle Muscato:

“My dad felt like he was a good dad because he played catch with me occasionally. I have no interest in sports.”

 

[Sneed's Feed n Seed]

This is why sloppy antisemitism on these boards, where every berg and ski and hoff is automatically ((()))ed, must be replaced and upgraded to my cutting edge AnthroScan (TM) (Patent Pending). Oversensitive early life detectors are enabling thousands of grifters and conmen. I alone can fix it!

 

[Sneed's Feed n Seed]

Pretty sure the penis thief is Osama Bin Laden, at the end of the game the player has the choice of taking their penis back or taking Osama's penis.

 

[HyperboreanRightsActivist]

China's president looks like Winnie the fucking Pooh

India's president looks like an actual poo.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

Library’s are now just hobo toilets and dudes jacking it to porn.

 

[Gentlebastard]

This was something she said to me like it was a funny anecdote, not a horrible, shameful secret that they should both take to their graves.

Back in the 70s men only crossdressed at home like God intended.

Ah yes, classic lesbian sex where a penis enters a vagina and the woman becomes pregnant. How could I forget that?

Honey you can call an Outhouse a Tool Shed but it won't stop it from smelling like shit.

it is very hard to stop car with bullet

whoever assumed the average person doesn't think highly enough of themselves and needs that encouragement was wrong, the average person needs to be knocked down more often

I've never been into wearing big flashy branded gear but fuck me there's someting wrong with you if you're dressing up as a shopping bag.

I thought the zoosadist leaks were bad but the thought of a group of woman hooting about a uterus plushie really makes me want to vomit at the sheer and utter degeneracy on display.

I'm pretty sure the barrel of that glock has seen warranty-voiding things no man or beast should ever have to experience.

You will NOT drop a juicy deuce in my toilet stalker child.

 

[CEO of Gay]

The booty is the forbidden zone

I'd prefer gay tranny sex to that monstrosity.

Can we stop discussing Russell's penis?

 

[Gravemind]

I've got enough people calling me nigger at work when they think I can't hear them that I've begun to walk up and use the word on them after letting HR know I heard it and don't take offense. After watching enough Metokur videos and lurking I've learned the nomenclature quite well.

I want to reply to every accusation but Im busy watching my kid have some fun.

I've got a hot tub to jump into with my biological woman of a wife and we might just have cisgender sex and create another baby before she hits 33

I'm black, it's true, a quadroon as hammerhead Venti would say.

The fact you deny my niggerhood is damn insane. I thought we were supposed to be civil here and not acting like cracked up Yakub babies. My tribe. My blood!

I could give an emotional response about how he owes me money for broken airsoft rifles or a dozen petty "gripes" but the biggest concern is unfinished projects and people being exploited.

 

[FuckMeGentlyWithAChainsaw]

Why do her nuts have nipples?!

Why are they black?!

 

[Gravemind]

Oh really? Was it the oregano he tried to sell to folks in high-school as "Exotic Spices" and would make the token up with a blunt and lighter gesture or was it actually weed? Because that faggot was selling drugs to kids and he tried to sell it to me. Fuck him and his oregano!

 

[Third World Aristocrat]

Robert Barnes raped my pet goat behind an Arby's in 1979.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

View attachment 6473055
Hey Jamie, pull up those interracial crime statistics

 

[Dork Of Ages]

@Molly Millions @Freshly Baked Socks @Axiom the Fucker