📚 Megathread Phil's Crowdfunding Adventures - Smokes weed every day, claims bipolar disorder

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I was about to ask why the fuck he needs so much for groceries (aside from being a greedy tard), then I remembered that he has to placate Toren with bottom-shelf booze.

(Let's be real, though - he's buying shit he doesn't need.)
I’d be surprised if he can even cook beyond the absolute basics. He’s probably spending a lot on ready meals and fast food.
 
As much as I think a job would fix most of Phil’s financial problems, all those fucked up tattoos have already made sure that will never happen. I mean, unless Phil finds someone who is just dying to hire an overweight potato with a “clitoral dough” tattoo for everyone to see.

It depends. Unfortunately the jobs that wouldn't care about his appearance or lack of any appropriate skills or work history are the ones he's utterly not cut out for. Phil couldn't hack it at a warehouse job; aside from the fact that he's so weak and lazy as to be a liability, his antisocial personality would also cause problems. He would almost certainly get his ass kicked by the other workers for being such a shit tier human being.

Ironically, in this day and age, I'd almost say he was made to be an op-ed writer or some sort of diversity quota hire for a liberal arts department, except he's not a woman, trans, or "PoC," so the type of people he'd actually want to associate with want nothing to do with him. That and the fact that he's too lazy to even write a few thousand words of SJW word soup a week, and too dumb to even fake understanding the newspeak that he parrots back.

Stick him in a warehouse or something. There are plenty of jobs he could do, but he doesn’t even try.

I'm not so sure. Its not just the tattoos at this point. He's got a terrible personality, he's lazy, he's old, he's physically pretty weak and doughy. Jobs that wouldn't care about shitty tattoos still would require him to physically be able to meet certain bare minimum requirements, and I just don't see Phil being able to do that, not to mention the fact that he'd almost certainly wind up antagonizing his co-workers. Phil is cut out to sort donations at a Good Will, or maybe even be a greeter at Wal-Mart (were it not for his appearance and attitude), maybe even working in fast food (except for his atrocious hygiene, but that's something that could be improved with coaching), but he's not suited for manual labor in the least. Again if he were younger and got some experience and exercise under his belt, maybe, but at this point he's likely a liability. I don't even think he has that tard strength going for him.

Nothing ensures success when asking working people who earn money to give you some of it to support your lifestyle of fagging up twatter all day long and dodging thrown beer bottles from Toren all night long quite as well as calling the people you are begging from 'motherfuckers', Phil! :story: Stay classy!

What makes you assume any of the people he's begging from actually work for money? Most of them seem to be as broke and unemployed as him, maybe getting money from their parents or something. Few members of the troon community seem to be productive members of society. Hell we know that Phil even "seeds" some of that money himself.
 
What makes you assume any of the people he's begging from actually work for money? Most of them seem to be as broke and unemployed as him, maybe getting money from their parents or something. Few members of the troon community seem to be productive members of society. Hell we know that Phil even "seeds" some of that money himself.

If he's actually begging only from people as broke-ass then he is, then I have somehow UNDER-estimated just how completely pants-shitting retarded he really is. (:_(
 
Does any brave kiwi want to mail him a month supply of dehydrated food from patriot supply?
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Does any brave kiwi want to mail him a month supply of dehydrated food from patriot supply?
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“I am projected to run out of food.” Damn but I love the way he tries to use big words to make himself sound important. Just say “I’m going to run out of food,” fatass. You didn’t employ a team of researchers to make a scientific estimate, you just didn’t do the shopping.
 
“I am projected to run out of food.” Damn but I love the way he tries to use big words to make himself sound important. Just say “I’m going to run out of food,” fatass. You didn’t employ a team of researchers to make a scientific estimate, you just didn’t do the shopping.
But he's a soupersolder, and this is military stuff! Of course he has to use words that make it sound vaguely official! This antifa larp is Phil's 'dimensional merge' a la CWC, but yet again Chris is better at it.

Phil, you showed us your kitchen cupboard packed full of at least 25 huge bags of rice, and claimed this was part of your stockpiling for the coming civil war or whatever. Go eat some rice and quit complaining about not having cash for takeaway pizza. We all know the reason you have a stockpile of rice is because you use the foodbank regularly, eat the good stuff and chuck what you're less keen on in a cupboard.
 
government shutdown for a wall: broke

government shutdown to see a boiled potato: woke
 
$244 a month for groceries? I have a wife and two kids and I don't think we spend that much on groceries unless we're doing something special in the month, like a birthday party or the holidays or having someone over for a really nice dinner. Then again, Phil and Slingblade are a pair of gluttonous fat-fucks.

And whatever happened to Phil's New Year's resolution of getting in shape for the coming civil war? Oh, right...forgotten, just like his vagina and everything else that failed to get him attention.
 
$244 a month for groceries? I have a wife and two kids and I don't think we spend that much on groceries unless we're doing something special in the month, like a birthday party or the holidays or having someone over for a really nice dinner. Then again, Phil and Slingblade are a pair of gluttonous fat-fucks.

And whatever happened to Phil's New Year's resolution of getting in shape for the coming civil war? Oh, right...forgotten, just like his vagina and everything else that failed to get him attention.
I reckon Phil could survive on a tenth of that. People do. It’s not great, it requires a fuckton of forward planning, but Phil’s pretending he’s about to starve here. The situation’s desperate y’all!
 
I reckon Phil could survive on a tenth of that.
I reckon that provided he remained hydrated, Phil is fat enough that he could survive 60 days of total caloric restriction. Zero. Nada. Nothing. The Bataan Death March Diet.

That'll toughen you up, Phil, put a little steel in your spine. Extra special bonus, you wouldn't look so apprentice-hambeast fatarded in your Antifa drag. Why not give it a try?
 
I reckon that provided he remained hydrated, Phil is fat enough that he could survive 60 days of total caloric restriction. Zero. Nada. Nothing. The Bataan Death March Diet.

That'll toughen you up, Phil, put a little steel in your spine. Extra special bonus, you wouldn't look so apprentice-hambeast fatarded in your Antifa drag. Why not give it a try?
The Japanese POWs built a railway on a bowl of rice per day. Phil’s too soft.
 
$244 a month for groceries? I have a wife and two kids and I don't think we spend that much on groceries unless we're doing something special in the month, like a birthday party or the holidays or having someone over for a really nice dinner. Then again, Phil and Slingblade are a pair of gluttonous fat-fucks.

And whatever happened to Phil's New Year's resolution of getting in shape for the coming civil war? Oh, right...forgotten, just like his vagina and everything else that failed to get him attention.
he lives in portland. food costs more.
 
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