💀 Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Big Nasty]

The funny thing is that very question was asked of Jesus in the Bible. He answered none as marriage is not a thing in heaven.

"It doesn't matter. None of this matters."

 

[WonderWino]

Lucas is trying to scam people again

and no lucas, nobody is going to be impressed by somebody having $200 in their wallet. Nor is anybody going to be sending you $200 'for your birthday'

He's comparing things nonsensically again. Daily reminder this is the same guy who spent years making similar rants and getting male and female plants mixed up while trying to 'explain' why he should fuck teen girls. You know, stuff that gets taught in grade 7 or 8

 

[Iscarabaid]

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Lucas repeating terms he's heard like 'eating the bugs' and proving he doesn't understand anything about 'green' energy or how its just as damaging to the environment as every other form of energy

Isn't this the same guy who's made dozens of videos calling out dudebros with cars and their pollution? I guess you're a dirty polluter if you're driving your car to go work your job that pays for Lucas' tugboat, but if you're making shitty AI art for an incomprehensible board game that no one's going to play then that's acceptable pollution. Yeah AI art is DEFINITELY far more essential than cars. He obviously never cared about pollution. It's just more proof Lucas doesn't believe in any of the bullshit he says, he just thinks it will get a Gen Z girl to date him.

 

[Iscarabaid]

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Lucas is trying to scam people again

and no lucas, nobody is going to be impressed by somebody having $200 in their wallet. Nor is anybody going to be sending you $200 'for your birthday'

At this point I think he just wants to fuck a prostitute. He's never getting that money lol. But hypothetically if he did, when that money runs out (and it will, probably in only 1 day), then whatever girl he manages to hypothetically get is gone. He keeps talking about how Gen Z women want emotional stability from Gen X men, but I think the only reason they'd date older is for financial stability which is something Lucas will never have. Lucas might literally be the most unappealing man in the world. The only thing he brings to the table is his cooking apparently because he keeps posting about it, but he is one of the worst cooks I've ever seen.

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

Luke forgot the "I'll give you $1000 to take you on a date to Churchill's" days. No girls cared then, sadly.

Poor guy can't even save up $200 since Mallon takes everything.

 

[Stinkyboy]

What a biggit capitalist

 

[WonderWino]

Lucas making nonsensical schizo connections again

Any woman who would have anything to do with lucas post lottery win would fleece him dry in 6 months and wouldn't be getting pregnant. Not by him anyway

Though can you imagine the look on lucas's face if said golddigger did get pregnant, lucas spends the next 9 months reeeeing publicly trying to rub it into everybodies faces that he's going to be a dad and raise a super telomere baby, with king roy and myrna no doubt horrified awaiting the inevitable police involvement and then the big day comes. Daddy wern waddles his fat ass down to the spokane hospital to watch his zoomer bae give birth

....and the baby comes out black as coal, the son of the zoomer golddiggers actual boyfriend who she was fucking the whole time while using lucas as a retarded ATM

Lucas would go fucking ballistic. No doubt the screeching would be so racist it would make a seasoned stormfronter blush. I can absolutely see lucas immediately exploding into a tirade about niggers stealing his zoomer bae and ubermensch baby opportunity and using him for money to the point he caught some kind of hate crime charge. Then oh boy would lucas's history come back to bite him in the ass. I'm not racist your honor! i'm a leftist! i'm against bigotry! says the guy told to explain dr nigger luke to the court

Lucas is claiming the universe wants him to fuck teen girls again

Only 56% of gen z report having had a romantic relationship in their teens posts the man who claims not to be a pedo as some kind of evidence that he's totally not a pedo and doing appropriate shit

and if they don't care about your wallet I guess you won't be needing that $200 you were trying to get people to give you then. Right lucas? You said it was to impress a zoomer for a date. Which is it? You can't keep your lies straight

 

[Da Dude123]

The cow just keeps on moooing. $200, huh? Yes, what Gen Z woman would not be impressed with a 46 year old man with $200? All the baes should be flocking to that!

Lucas really thinks AI is plenty good. Only bigots would not think so.

 

[WonderWino]

Lucas proving yet again that he has no idea what virtue signaling is. None of those things are even remotely virtue signaling . Also unsurprisingly he's managed to convince himself that virtue signaling is about trying to pick up women. It isn't and everybody knows it isn't. Except lucas apparently. The funny thing is the only people who do try to use it for such things are male feminist predator types. So much so it literally inspired a fucking meme about that. So props to lucas for accidentally proving himself to be a walking stereotype of a sexual predator again

Also, lucas knows literally nothing about video games. When he was young they were the exact sort of thing you didn't want the hot women knowing you did cause it was seen as nerdy as fuck and something basement dwellers did. Lucas on some level recognizes that this view has changed somewhat since the 80s and 90s. He doesn't know how or have any understanding of it beyond that cause he is too stupid to understand or play games as proven by the shit with the DS galdaor gave him. But he knows some women like them now and somehow convinced himself that playing games is now some kind of flex to impress women (lolwut?) or that he can somehow use it as an in of some kind. Clearly he has heard something about the fairly recent trend of retarded devs trying to insert sjw and virtual signaling shit into games to lecture their players and such and somehow managed to convince himself this means video games are virtual signaling rather than said retarded devs pissing people off by trying to force their political insanity on people using said games as a medium. Because lucas is a fucking moron. Whats next? Is he going to start reeeing about gamergate and creeping on zoe quinn, ten years too late?

As for the rest of that, its clearly his usual obsessions getting twisted around and forced to fit in his pre-existing views of everything. Cars, sports, religious stuff. All the usual shit lucas hates and is jealous of. He's just trying to spin things in his head and create a new narrative that will totally work and get him his teen queen this time if he just words things in a different way and presents them in a different context. Textbook lolcow looking for the magic phrase to unlock what he wants

This picture really is worth a thousand words. First, thats definitely some resident of mallon place. He looks doped to the fucking gills, and barely there mentally, which you'd have to be to put up with lucas let alone eat anything he's touched. But lucas is essentially admitting to exploiting this guy to buy him alcohol. Something he's not supposed to have and shouldn't be having regardless given he has a difficult enough time behaving himself sober, and 'rewarding' him by getting a pizza that lucas definitely ate most of himself. All so lucas can totally show off how great of a guy he is and virtue signal to zoomer baes about it (the irony of talking nonsense about virtue signaling while essentially doing it himself, and to get a date no less is hilarious in itself) which is pretty standard for his MO and narcissism. At least its better than filming himself throwing pep sticks on a sleeping hobo in the middle of the night

That said, the pizza looks awful. It literally looks like one of those take home and bake pizzas from walmart that somebody threw a couple handfuls of toppings onto before tossing it in the oven. There is barely any cheese and it doesn't even look like its been cooked properly. and thats probably more vegetables than lucas has had in months. I'm surprised he didn't go for an all meat pizza. and of course he claims this is the best pizza he's ever had. He does that alot. Says the same shit about sushi.com that has shit sushi while ordering americanized garbage with siracha mayo and maple syrup on it and thinks he's eating sushi, and from that taco stand he keeps bragging about in spokane that has awful reviews online. But this is lucas, what do you expect.

So we know lucas is exploiting this guy for alcohol. I wonder what else he's trying to get out of him. Not to mention why would anyone willingly associate with lucas like this even for a pizza? This guy must really be fucked in the head. We already know he tried this with jamie and that guy was clearly not playing with a full deck either. I'm starting to notice a pattern. Lucas is trying to be the biggest fish in the pond and fancies himself king retard. Funny we don't see him trying this with people he met outside mallon place anymore. Just like he tried to blackmail his previous neighbors, this time he's trying to manipulate them with food and other shit to try to get what he wants out of them. Same MO, different tactics

Of course he only replies to the female poster, who is clearly being sarcastic. I also like the 'do you like cheese pizza' comment. Its very clear what that poster is trying to get lucas to say (and that person has been an obvious troll for months now) but you can bet lucas will take it at face value and not realize its a pedo reference

 

[Stinkyboy]

That looks like a frozen pizza, lol. Best in his life, poor slob.

 

[Kingfisher9000]

I'm surprised he didn't go for an all meat pizza

No way, a meat lovers pizza is way too basic. The zoomer baes would never be impressed by that. Much better to order 8 different veggies. It totally doesn’t matter that the amount of water in the toppings will cause the pizza to be undercooked and shitty. This is how grown ups eat pizza!

 

[WonderWino]

Lucas isn't making the point he thinks he is here. Now lucas, do the '17 year olds' and 'teenagers' in europe that rape women and kids and then get a slap on the wrist for being young orphans when they're 30+

We can add feudalism to the list of things lucas doesn't understand. and monarchies. Lucas doesn't have the slightest understanding of either of those things or how they actually worked (hint: kings didn't have as much power as you seem to think they do lucas and for that matter neither do CEOs)

Lucas is virtue signaling again

This is a provable lie. First, that situation never happened and second lucas is a proven cheater who was hitting on other catfish right up to the point he got on the plane to LA. Whenever he gets the opportunity he has several catfish on the go as backups. He even projected this behavior onto cyril back in the day and claimed (in an utterly nonsensical way) that cyril was somehow doing this to him

and anybody who feels it necessary to try to convince others he's not a cheater by advertising it like that is absolutely a cheater and knows it. Its a massive red flag and something you see frequently in dating site profiles

Lucas thinks mean words and trying to celebrate a little murder and encourage further murders are somehow the same thing

Getting real defensive there lucas. Lucas is not straight, wernology has proof of that and lucas knows it. Nor does anybody go out of their way to tell you how straight they are if they really are. Thats textbook in the closet behavior

EDIT:

Lucas is talking exactly like and using the same logic as stormfronters when they're ranting about jews controlling all the media

So.... thats why you paid for your pizza dinner date with that older guy from mallon place then? I mean after he bought you some drinks first, like you said

I mean lucas is the one who said it - he buys men dinner because they bought him drinks first and he's the one taking pics bragging about buying dinner for other men like an IG thot. Not exactly the kind of thing you'd expect from a straight man there lucas, just saying

Again, he's talking exactly like stormfronters talk about jews

 

[Iscarabaid]

Lucas is virtue signaling again

Lucas must not know that most people have jobs, work 40 hours a week, have kids/family to take care of, have chores/cleaning/cooking to do, etc... These people can't drop everything and go protest for weeks. Probably a hard concept for him to understand because he's never had to work and never had any responsibility. Lucas on the other hand has all the time in the world and if he really cared he could probably organize his own, or even just go to a protest. We know that won't happen though because he's too lazy. He'd rather stick to posting bullshit on Facebook that changes nothing at all.

 

[WonderWino]

Somehow it figures that lucas would be a kiss fan

Those two things have nothing to do with each other, its also blatant nonsense. To say nothing of the fact lucas has free healthcare, so yet again he is virtue signaling and trying to play victim for something that has literally nothing to do with him

 

[Purple_Urkel]

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Somehow it figures that lucas would be a kiss fan

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Those two things have nothing to do with each other, its also blatant nonsense. To say nothing of the fact lucas has free healthcare, so yet again he is virtue signaling and trying to play victim for something that has literally nothing to do with him

You really hate this lucas guy huh?

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

What the fuck does driving have to do with semen?
He's clearly off his meds.

Lucas Brain: "I can't drive so cars = bad. I look up reason car = bad, I find air pollution. No car = no air pollution. No air pollution = clean cum"
(lives in dinky fartbox and rarely ever leaves)

 

[HackerX]

At this point I think he just wants to fuck a prostitute.

That's an interesting question. Would he? Yeah, I'm sure, but I don't think he'd ever actively and intentionally seek one. Nevermind the fact that the dude would be terrified during the entire encounter, or even the initial encounter. I don't think his brain can really process what a prostitute is or what they do. Like, he wouldn't even understand the concept of it being a transactional, one-time thing. It's kinda funny because Lucas moos about how women should love him, be nice to him, show empathy, etc when he really just means fuck him, but I seriously doubt he could grasp the idea of a hooker fucking him and immediately forgetting he exists. (This is obv a lala scenario because no woman would fuck Lucas, and in the deranged, schizoreality where a woman would fuck Lucas, there's simply no way anyone could forget that trauma. Legit horror vibes. Kinda like that one chick who got raped by the demon falcon dude from Berserk.)

No way, a meat lovers pizza is way too basic. The zoomer baes would never be impressed by that. Much better to order 8 different veggies. It totally doesn’t matter that the amount of water in the toppings will cause the pizza to be undercooked and shitty. This is how grown ups eat pizza!

Lucas has that special 'tism where flavor is irrelevant. He eats the most random shit mixed together with more random shit because his brain assigns some sort of value to the random shit. To him, that value is meant to attract a zoomer bae for whatever reason his tarded brain conjures up. Well, that AND he's a fatass glutton so it's a combination of 'more = better' with him believing it'll impress someone. Not sure why he thinks doing that shit will impress anyone though outside of no theory of mind and assuming everyone values food the same way he does.

Lucas must not know that most people have jobs, work 40 hours a week, have kids/family to take care of, have chores/cleaning/cooking to do, etc... These people can't drop everything and go protest for weeks. Probably a hard concept for him to understand because he's never had to work and never had any responsibility.

I've mentioned this before, but he absolutely does not know what working 40 hours a week entails. Nor what it means to own a car, a house, have kids, etc. Not even for the reasons you listed, like never having any of that in the first place. Sure, those are true and correct, but the dude's brain is fundamentally different from normal humans. He lacks nearly every form of abstract thought, and can't comprehend the intrinsic value of ... probably anything really.

It's like his brain attempts to assign some sort of quantifiable number to whatever 'thing' to make sense if it. Now, we all do that to a much, much less extent. (For example , the size of the universe or 1 million bazillion gorillion dollars. We all know the universe is unbelievably massive, but no one can really conceive the actual size within their head. Outside of a vague concept, we all know it's really, really big, but don't remotely grasp how big it is.) However, Lucas has a few issues. (That's an understatement!)

1) Every time is brain arrives to some sort of concept, it's so unbelievably far away from a normal person's. To the point where the concept in Lucas's brain is wholly separate from whatever spurred the concept, aka reality.

2) For whatever reason, his defective brain doesn't venture into anything unknown to him. Whether it's @WonderWino 's Crimestop theory, undiagnosed autism, or Lucas being a bonafide retard is anyone's guess, but if Lucas's brain comes across a missing variable, he immediately assigns something to that variable, which is generally bigots, capitalism, or theism.

3) I know 'theory of mind' gets thrown around a bit, and I've even used it somewhere in the post, but it applies to Lucas in such a surreal way. Lucas being unaware that other people have their own thoughts/mind is obvious, but I'm not particularly sure he's aware that he has his own thoughts/mind. Like, him begging for Gen Z puss puss isn't a thought to him, it just is, and it's also something everyone 'is' too. It's why I think he manages to project himself so intimately accurate, yet absurdly unawarely too.

4) Lack of real-world context. Basically the reason you mentioned. The idea of a 40 hour work week is alien to him because you could count the number of 10 hour work weeks he's had on one hand. MAYBE two hands. So basically anything beyond his direct experience is foreign, and his direct experience is a few hundred bucks, homeless shelters, and getting denied by women. Then you consider that, along with how Lucas deals with the abstract in the points above, and you get a Lucas Werner.

Now let's see what everyone's favorite 45 year old schizofrenic, diabetic hobo is doing on Facebook.

Spoiler: Facebook Posts

And on the Tiktok front!

Spoiler: Tiktok

 

[Stinkyboy]

It's funny to see Lucas still bringing up his "much older girlfriend" as if she wasn't the only person he's ever dated in his life.

 

[mothman96]

In the tiktok he'd date a fully transitioned transwoman - in FB post-op is an inside out penis - so he would not date a transwoman.

Creepers FB

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

I asked Lucas back in the day about getting a prostitute since he was willing to pay any Gen Z bae to go on a date with him, and he firmly said he doesn't need to do that (he's plenty good) along with wanting love, children, telomerase, etc...

I don't think it's about the actual sex, with a woman at least.