🐍 In the Clock Tower KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

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Agares said:
We should also add a list of places Cobra's been banned from since those bans are usually pretty entertaining.

CY Bar (2020)

Frosty's (2021)

The Office Bar and Grill (presumably) (2022)

Albertson's CY location (2023).
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I do have a locations tab set up, I just haven't introduced it to the main page yet. There's half a dozen places I need to tie up still, and a bunch of loose ends I need to finish. Priority #1 is still Boglim History and characters. Bit more of a pain because I don't have all the details(Like who the hell is Goldfinger? Where do I even start with Walt and Angie?) while working on making the wiki look more presentable, fleshing out the innumerable Incidents, forcing myself to listen to the albums, and cataloguing Drink Combos/Food Hacks.
Big ups to the non-farmer that is writing up the Mead article in grisly detail, though.
Should also probably poke Larsony to give me mod privileges so I can ban those AI clickbait article writers, too. So much to do.
 
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Lei Wulong's Left Leg said:
I do have a locations tab set up, I just haven't introduced it to the main page yet. There's half a dozen places I need to tie up still, and a bunch of loose ends I need to finish. Priority #1 is still Boglim History and characters. Bit more of a pain because I don't have all the details(Like who the hell is Goldfinger? Where do I even start with Walt and Angie?) while working on making the wiki look more presentable, fleshing out the innumerable Incidents, forcing myself to listen to the albums, and cataloguing Drink Combos/Food Hacks.
Big ups to the non-farmer that is writing up the Mead article in grisly detail, though.
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Wish I could help more but I was never a wiki editor and I'm a busy man. All I have are just scraps of info that I remember from the old wiki and the subreddit.
 
Lei Wulong's Left Leg said:
I do have a locations tab set up, I just haven't introduced it to the main page yet. There's half a dozen places I need to tie up still, and a bunch of loose ends I need to finish. Priority #1 is still Boglim History and characters. Bit more of a pain because I don't have all the details(Like who the hell is Goldfinger? Where do I even start with Walt and Angie?)
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Goldfinger was just a random dude who lived nearby and played GTA at his house for a couple of weeks, then he bounced forevermore. He’s not really notable, he’s kind of a footnote in the Conquistador Era.

The start of Walt and Angie is the start of Ellen.


Actually it’s not a bad idea to just hit up Bitesize Cobra Videos and ask him he’ll prob know all about this shit
 
Al Dente Alighieri said:
Goldfinger was just a random dude who lived nearby and played GTA at his house for a couple of weeks, then he bounced forevermore. He’s not really notable, he’s kind of a footnote in the Conquistador Era.
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It's surprising how many newbies fixate on gold finger for no apparent reason
 
Devil Wears Prada said:
BOY responding to a justpearlythings dating advice video. I get Josh is retarded but that even someone of his mental capacity can't see why irony in making dating advice videos when his only qualifications over the past six years are sex dolls and NAL is astounding. Not that pearly is much more intelligent or insightful
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The Boy just likes to do his own "redpill" shit. There have been instances where he'll admit to having watched something (generally "Isaah Butterfield") and feel like he has to contribute to the dialog. If you go and try to find what he watched -generally the latest upload of said vlogger- it would be nearly word for word what they had already said, just run through his retard filter.

I assume he's just realized a lot of YouTubers will all discuss the same basic shit at the same time and deduced "well shit, I better get in on that too" thinking that's just how the YouTuber game goes.
 
So how did Cobes actually rip the vagina on that sex doll because it for sure wasn't his dick
 
Star Spangled Bogger said:
Cobra admits in his recent rant video that he did in fact send NAL the chocolate beer to fulfill a promise he made to have her try it.
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You can't say he's a man of his word.

"I know things ended poorly with domestic violence, abuse and almost a shotgun suicide on my part but I did promise to send you the chocolate beer. A promise is a promise, even if I try to kill myself."
 
After recent events I really have reevaluated my opinion of Cobes. I used to think the BOY was harmless and just retarded but after seeing him lie to everyone, back down on his "morals" and whatnot against the Bogwitch, and suicide bait, I really think he isn't nearly as retarded as he acts. The booze and duster have rotted him into a shell of himself but even with Jessica's clear lies it's clear that he knows right from wrong and willfully chooses to be wrong. ODD isn't a real thing and he uses that as a cop out but in reality he is just a prick who is too lazy too go out and work and uses his disabilities to play on others. Cobes needs total content death just like Bowser had, it's the only way his life gets any better
 
Josh just never learns man. She hasn't even been gone a full week and he is already back in contact with her, sending her Doordash orders and talking about her at length.

He will let her back in, mark my words, and next time it's really gonna go bad.

I like him trying to say actually it was Jessica who threatened to kill herself with my shotgun. I'm guessing he thinks the only version of the video people have seen is the cut up version NAL released to make it look like Josh threatened to shoot her. I don't think he is aware Messica released the full video and he is on camera pressing a shotgun under his chin, talking about blowing his head off.

G'Kar said:
After recent events I really have reevaluated my opinion of Cobes. I used to think the BOY was harmless and just retarded but after seeing him lie to everyone, back down on his "morals" and whatnot against the Bogwitch, and suicide bait, I really think he isn't nearly as retarded as he acts. The booze and duster have rotted him into a shell of himself but even with Jessica's clear lies it's clear that he knows right from wrong and willfully chooses to be wrong. ODD isn't a real thing and he uses that as a cop out but in reality he is just a prick who is too lazy too go out and work and uses his disabilities to play on others. Cobes needs total content death just like Bowser had, it's the only way his life gets any better
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It's too little too late, I can't imagine Josh would even be capable of holding down a job at this point even if he got completely clean. He doesn't know how to properly behave around women, every place he has ever worked his female coworkers have complained about him. He is honestly trapped, he will be making wands and ebegging for how ever long his body holds on for. There is no way he could maintain a schedule, stay clean (both hygiene wise and drug/alcohol wise) and there is no way he could perform at a level that wouldn't result in him being fired.

The only "good" ending left I could think of would be Josh finding a manager type that has no interest in taking advantage of him and instead optimizes his merch and handles the technical aspects of his videos/streams. There are so many talented artists that watch Cobra that I'm sure would be more than willing to make some art, free of charge, for Josh to slap on a t-shirt and sell instead of the absolute slop merch he makes on his own. There are a lot of ways Josh could optimize and leverage his current content to make some extra cash and with someone tard wrangling him they could even set aside some cash for him so he isn't constantly in the negative and having to beg. This will never happen obviously but that's the good ending.
 
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Jobama said:
I don't think Josh has gone to any kind of therapy since he turned 18.
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If I remember correctly, Clint made him see some sort of therapist or counselor a couple years ago, after he was arrested for having a public freak-out while blackout drunk during the holidays. I'm pretty sure he actually went once or twice, and even quit drinking for about half a week, before he decide he'd put enough effort into turning his life around and dropped it altogether.
 
Lei Wulong's Left Leg said:
Bit of shameless self-promotion but I've made a FAQ section on the Boglimpedia. Hopefully we can put some of the unfunny thought loops to rest.
It also features:

View attachment 6399052
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This part of the wiki needs to be edited. This really isn't an answer more of an opinion the real answer is Clint can't put him in a group home against his will it's not legal. Josh would literally rather die then agree to going to one.
Screenshot 2024-09-09 213335.png
 
Sicko Hunter said:
This part of the wiki needs to be edited. This really isn't an answer more of an opinion the real answer is Clint can't put him in a group home against his will it's not legal. Josh would literally rather die then agree to going to one.
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Josh isn't mentally competent though, does he legally have a choice? Not a lawyer so I have no fucking clue but one would assume someone with his "disability"(which he vastly overexaggerates) couldn't make a legal decision for himself
 
G'Kar said:
Josh isn't mentally competent though, does he legally have a choice? Not a lawyer so I have no fucking clue but one would assume someone with his "disability"(which he vastly overexaggerates) couldn't make a legal decision for himself
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He isn't legally incompetent. He's an adult. He's a fucked up one but if he wants to do duster and drink all day the state can't step in and imprison him. I don't know why people always say this shit.

He isn't Daniel Larson who is seriously non compos mentis.
 
AnOminous said:
I don't know why people always say this shit.
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Bless their innocence, they obviously haven't experienced the system enough to realize just how bad someone has to get before anyone steps in.

This is the United States, if you want to be a fuck up that's your god given right. And TBH if the government did start intervening with someone like Josh, that would be a little concerning; I'm willing to bet there are quite a few Cobra watchers not living lives that much better than he is.
 
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