🐍 In the Clock Tower KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Fortyone]

Clint inspired his boy to wanting to be strong. Cobes stayed reasonably fit until the alcohol overtook him completely. I think it was only around 2022 or so that he started to get visibly out of shape.

Up until covid the boy got out of the house, but from 2022 or 2021 onward he literally just sat in his house 24/7 from sun up to sun down daily and stewed his organs in tar, alcohol, petrochemicals from duster, grease and burnt food chemicals, etc.

It sucks ass he died so early but it's really not surprising he died so early considering his extreme sedentary lifestyle. If the heart attack didn't get him a blood clot from his leg would have later on from how long he sat around.

 

[Phíloden- King of Denthan]

i didnt dig for anything. public information. it took me 5 minutes to get this, and anyone can get the exact same information. my own personal policy is to never obtain information that isnt available to the general public.
and as for "a-logging" what on earth have i said about him that is negative or mean? absolutely nothing.

as an aside, i like to collect autopsy reports of interesting people or people ive known in real life. whatever. like ANYONE on here can claim to have normal extracurricular activities.
at any rate, it does show that he wasn't this drug addled mess that people claimed he was, and i guarantee you that some reddit fag wouldve gotten a hold of the same report and edited it to make him look bad. but all that aside, i am willing to erase my post if that many people are offended, as this most definitely was never my intent. i will say though...merely being here and talking about him makes you part of the bigger picture. of which none of us can claim innocence. but never have i picked on him or said anything mean spirited.

If I ever find out im dying ill arrange to send you mine.

 

[Fishnumm]

im a retarded nigger..what does this mean?
View attachment 7990741

exactly what it means retarded nigger

 

[Nigger Cattle]

For anyone curious why she attracted so much ire, near the end she started trying to gain traction by doing shit like commentating over true crime videos, Chris Chan (by her own admission she had not watched ANY of his vids), yapping over trending tiktok slop, etc. Then she lost her entire channel and hadn't backed anything up like she claimed she was going to, so we lost 99% of her golden content. Instead of paying for her own streamyard account she was caught stealing the account of some poor waterbrain when he kept trying to use it (attached). Lastly she had screencaps leak of her accepting money from some random paypig as well as a guy who was receiving cancer treatment. In both cases she was crying about how she can't pay her bills and I guess they felt bad for her... mind you she lives in a room provided by some friend and pays zero rent. Oh yeah, and she had some guy actually agree to be findom'd by her.

I really dislike Krystal. I started watching her stuff thinking she was just someone who liked watching lolcow content, and I thought she was interesting enough because she sometimes had Cobes on. But she’s really manipulative and was, in fact, getting ‘donations’ from different people, when I thought she was streaming just because she wanted to talk to people and watch lolcow stuff. It wasn't even out in the open, she would tell your her woes in DMs until you felt bad enough for her and gave her 50 bucks, 100 bucks etc.

When her ex-husband died, I remember a bunch of people offering to pay for her bus ticket so she could go see her kids. What did she do? She still wanted the money but claimed there was nothing she could do because the kids’ stepmom had already filed for custody of her youngest son—which is bullshit.
Krystal is as white trash as white trash gets. I don’t think she’s evil, but she’s a narcissist. If you try to talk to her about anyone other than herself, she tunes out immediately.

 

[RollingRock2]

The fact that Cobes was 6'4" but thought he was 5'9" is hilarious.

I will point out that human bodies can stretch a few inches if they've been man handled. Clint said he tried to resuscitate Cobes and you can't really do CPR on someone on a mattress. If Clint dragged Cobes out of bed he might have stretched him out somewhat.

 

[BeatboxBill]

Was there any updates about the autopsy yet?

I just wanted to know whether or not he went out peacefully, the thoughts of Cobra going out in agony still haunts my brain.

 

[RollingRock2]

Was there any updates about the autopsy yet?

I just wanted to know whether or not he went out peacefully, the thoughts of Cobra going out in agony still haunts my brain.

Yes he died of a heart attack in his sleep

 

[anliteralidiot]

Was there any updates about the autopsy yet?

I just wanted to know whether or not he went out peacefully, the thoughts of Cobra going out in agony still haunts my brain.

From all accounts: yes. Myocardial infarction. Maybe he would've said "my cardinal infracshun."
He ordered some Tampico juice on door dash, went to bed, and died in his sleep.

 

[Asmobaby]

Thanks for posting this. I think we all figured it was a heart attack but it's nice to have confirmation.

Curious if it was booze related - I mean having a bad heart is definitely booze related, but if he was feeling sick and/or stopped drinking booze for whatever reason enough to go into withdrawals, that could certainly cause a heart attack as well.

I still think he's rotten teeth had a lot to do with it. Or, at least contributed to it. When tooth decay really progresses, it can reach the "pulp" of the teeth, which leads to the infection, which can then spread to the organs. This includes the heart (causing a heart attack), the brain, and the spinal cord. On top of his obviously damaged liver, his rotten chompers likely just speedened up this process, causing a heart attack to happen much sooner than it may have otherwise.

Spoiler: Speaking from personal experience...

Slight powerlevel, but whatever, I think my story is worth sharing to anyone that may listen. I was a hardcore drinker for about 15-20 years. It got really bad when Covid hit, and for the last 5 years or so I was ingesting at least a half liter of vodka every single day. I'm talking morning, during my work shift break, and then from the time I got home until the time I went to bed.

My organs always hurt. I was vomiting at least once a day. I know, for a fact, if I had kept it going any longer, I - for sure - would have ended up like Cobes. I think the only thing that really stalled that process was the fact that I had a much better diet than Cobra and that I was actively working 5 days a week at a pretty physical job. And, of course, my teeth are not bad like his were.

But anyway, like many have said, this kid just had so many other problems on top of the alcohol abuse that he didn't stand a chance. I do, however, think if he had been able to medically detox and maybe spent some time in a comfy psych ward, eating real food, getting on the right meds, and attending the therapy sessions he could have had a shot at sobriety. A longshot, I know, but it couldn't have hurt for him to try.

Unpopular opinion, but I still really wish Clint, or some other adult in his life would have pushed for a 72 hour hold. We have fucking video evidence of the boy being a danger to himself. I think that should have been sufficient. But it's too late now, so I'm done with the sperging. Damn, I'll miss him.

EDIT: Oh, on top of detoxing, I think he should have had those teeth removed years ago. I'm sure he coulda got some hella Goth vampire teeth or something. He woulda rocked that.

 

[Fishnumm]

i fucking hate the troles so much



every time we fart guys send the ghost farts to josh so he has plenty of wet n' juicys for the sick trole menace 2 cobesociety

 

[Tetragrammaton]

I'm sure he coulda got some hella Goth vampire teeth or something. He woulda rocked that.

this is one thing im very sad we will never get to experience because i know cobes would have loved some goth as fuck dentures. though he totally would have tried to spray paint them black and carved little things into them.

 

[ASeabear8952]

I really dislike Krystal. I started watching her stuff thinking she was just someone who liked watching lolcow content, and I thought she was interesting enough because she sometimes had Cobes on. But she’s really manipulative and was, in fact, getting ‘donations’ from different people, when I thought she was streaming just because she wanted to talk to people and watch lolcow stuff. It wasn't even out in the open, she would tell your her woes in DMs until you felt bad enough for her and gave her 50 bucks, 100 bucks etc.

When her ex-husband died, I remember a bunch of people offering to pay for her bus ticket so she could go see her kids. What did she do? She still wanted the money but claimed there was nothing she could do because the kids’ stepmom had already filed for custody of her youngest son—which is bullshit.
Krystal is as white trash as white trash gets. I don’t think she’s evil, but she’s a narcissist. If you try to talk to her about anyone other than herself, she tunes out immediately.

She could honestly be worthy of her own thread.

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

She could honestly be worthy of her own thread.

Don't give her attention.

 

[anliteralidiot]

Don't give her attention.

What if we overtook JESSICA BOYLE'S thread, and talked about her there?

 

[Atomic Tampon Cat]

What if we overtook JESSICA BOYLE'S thread, and talked about her there?

That'd probably piss off JESSICA BOYLE too since she's obsessed with her kiwi thread. It'd be a win-win.

 

[Dokkaebi Is Calling]

Nah that is fucking wild to see 6'4" 217 lb. Looking at his videos and seeing pictures of people around him they should've been training for football or basketball instead of playing guitar and freestyling.

Either Cobra and his friends missed out on at least being Wyoming college athletes or they boofed the measurements.

This then makes me question, if he was 6'4" was Darf just a regular sized guy and Casper is just a town of giants?

 

[anliteralidiot]

Nah that is fucking wild to see 6'4" 217 lb. Looking at his videos and seeing pictures of people around him they should've been training for football or basketball instead of playing guitar and freestyling.

Either Cobra and his friends missed out on at least being Wyoming college athletes or they boofed the measurements.

That ain't what he wanted to be, and you can't tame a cobra, or else you'll get bit.

 

[Tiggy Skibbles]

Height can be part of your medication calculations. Saying you're taller than you are can kill you if they have to put you under or sedate you.

Reading a thread isn't the same as digging up an autopsy report because you don't trust a grieving father. It's ghoulish.

trust me, its best to go with the flow here.

 

[Nigger Cattle]

Nah that is fucking wild to see 6'4" 217 lb. Looking at his videos and seeing pictures of people around him they should've been training for football or basketball instead of playing guitar and freestyling.

Either Cobra and his friends missed out on at least being Wyoming college athletes or they boofed the measurements.

This then makes me question, if he was 6'4" was Darf just a regular sized guy and Casper is just a town of giants?

He was actually a 6'4'' black man originally named Jahlani Faye-Shaun.
RIP to a real nigga.

 

[deadson]

They will be doing that any way. Probably trying to get the full version or any pictures/video taken if there was any.

It's still fucking creepy to have such a parasocial relationship with someone you want their autopsy report to be public. For all of Clint's flaws he has been extreme generous and open about Cobe's passing and tried to include the internet part of his life. This document didn't need to be made public.

Hence why she did it first, and was really respectful about it too. There was nothing a-loggy about it at all, nothing to do with weenery. It might've been intrusive to a slight degree, but if it's public knowledge, then it's fair game. And yes, Clint was kind enough to even tell us how Cobes died, but with enough naysayers it was helpful to have proof that it was confirmed.

Also, you're on the farms, bro. Parasocial behavior is the name of the game, at least in observation goals. Anything more than that is what gets you the retarded redditor badge.