IslamQA.info - Batshit insane Islamic rulings

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All the Jew hate makes me laugh because they're worshiping the same fucking god and follow a lot of the same rules, it's just fucking funny.
 
Ouija Board said:
I think it's wrong, really wrong. I feel that everyone should have the freedom to believe what they want to and be able to leave a church or group without punishment from the followers. This is also the reason I hate Scientology. I know that in Islam they kill apostates and that keeps people in fear. I don't think God wants that.
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Correct. In both Judaism and Christianity, God makes it clear he can't force people to love Him through fear and coercion. He doesn't like people directly and flagrantly defying him, but He still recognizes he can't force everyone on bent knee through terror, it has to be a willful choice on humanity's side to bend that knee.

Besides, both Christianity and Judiasm acknowledge we have a choice in the matter, and while consequences are outlined for not making the right one, we are still given the choice to acknowledge that and do our own thing at our own risk.

Jesus even pointed out multiple times he could have invoked his Father's authority to get people to do what he wanted, but he refused because he wanted the love for God to be willful, not one based on fear, and even in the Old Testament God straight up said multiple times he'd rather the wicked repent and accept his grace as opposed to killing every apostate or heretic because we were given free will since day one and thus he wanted us to exercise it in favor of him by our own choice.
 
BadaBadaBoom said:
A person who is praying may sometimes imagine that he has passed wind whilst praying, when that has not in fact happened. This may be due to the whispering of the Shaytaan (the devil) who wants to spoil his prayer and make him not focus with proper humility in it. The worshiper should not stop praying unless he is certain that something has come out of him. - https://islamqa.info/en/8910

Man, and I really wanted to make a joke about Wahhabism being the strict adherence to the teachings of Wario.
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So farts are the work of Satan. I'd say blame it on the dog. But those are haram.
 
Does inhaling steam violate fasting?
https://islamqa.info/en/93821

Rules on sitting next to machines that produce steam or smoke during Ramadan
https://islamqa.info/en/106451

Does inhaling the smell of food being cooked violate fasting?
https://islamqa.info/en/66079

Is it allowed to use Nasal Spray?
https://islamqa.info/en/156278

Are Bug Zappers allowed?
https://islamqa.info/en/105190

Does pus coming out of the body violate fasting?
https://islamqa.info/en/174793

Btw they have 12 pages of whether or not stuff violates fasting
https://islamqa.info/en/cat/298


Edit:

lol they have a ruling on trolling someone by sending them pictures of food on social media during fasting
https://islamqa.info/en/250669

They leave nothing unanswered. They take every single thing in existence into account when it comes to possibly violating fasting.
 
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IVF is verboten.

IslamQA said:
He replied:

(a) If there is no need for this procedure then we do not think it is permissible, because it involves surgery to extract the eggs – as you mention in the question – and this surgery involves uncovering the ‘awrah unnecessarily, then it involves surgery and there is the fear that it may have effects even in the distant future, such as damaging the Fallopian tube or causing infections.

Moreover, if things are left to proceed naturally as created by the Most merciful of those who show mercy and the Wisest of judges, that is closer to proper etiquette with Allaah and it is better and more beneficial than ways invented by man, which may appear initially to be good but they fail later on.
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Not because the surgery might lead to infections or risk, but because the surgeon and/or nurses might see her mapatasi. Yeah.
 
Ouija Board said:
I think it's wrong, really wrong. I feel that everyone should have the freedom to believe what they want to and be able to leave a church or group without punishment from the followers. This is also the reason I hate Scientology. I know that in Islam they kill apostates and that keeps people in fear. I don't think God wants that.
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GethN7 said:
Correct. In both Judaism and Christianity, God makes it clear he can't force people to love Him through fear and coercion. He doesn't like people directly and flagrantly defying him, but He still recognizes he can't force everyone on bent knee through terror, it has to be a willful choice on humanity's side to bend that knee.

Besides, both Christianity and Judiasm acknowledge we have a choice in the matter, and while consequences are outlined for not making the right one, we are still given the choice to acknowledge that and do our own thing at our own risk.

Jesus even pointed out multiple times he could have invoked his Father's authority to get people to do what he wanted, but he refused because he wanted the love for God to be willful, not one based on fear, and even in the Old Testament God straight up said multiple times he'd rather the wicked repent and accept his grace as opposed to killing every apostate or heretic because we were given free will since day one and thus he wanted us to exercise it in favor of him by our own choice.
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Yeah, Islam's rules on apostasy make it seem more like a mafia than a religion. After Muhammad died, a ton of Muslims basically said "Alright, we're done with this whole "Islam" thing" and apostatized. Muhammad's successor, Abu Bakr, launched multiple military campaigns that crushed rebellion against Islam and forced people to re-convert. So, in other words, not only did people not like Islam enough to stay with it after Muhammad died, they literally had to be forced back into it. One of the world's most respected Sunni scholars, Yusuf al-Qaradawi, even admitted that if Muslims had "gotten rid of the apostasy punishment, Islam wouldn't exist today."

IslamQA has this to say about apostasy, and unfortunately, it's a view shared by a truly huge amount of Muslims. The bolded parts were added by me for emphasis:

Praise be to Allaah.

Your question may be answered by the following points:

(1) This is the ruling of Allaah and His Messenger, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever changes his religion, kill him." (reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, no. 3017).

(2) The one who has known the religion which Allaah revealed, entered it and practised it, then rejected it, despised it and left it, is a person who does not deserve to live on the earth of Allaah and eat from the provision of Allaah.

(3) By leaving Islaam, the apostate opens the way for everyone who wants to leave the faith, thus spreading apostasy and encouraging it.

(4) The apostate is not to be killed without warning. Even though his crime is so great, he is given a last chance, a respite of three days in which to repent. If he repents, he will be left alone; if he does not repent, then he will be killed.

(5) If the punishment for murder and espionage (also known as high treason) is death, then what should be the punishment for the one who disbelieves in the Lord of mankind and despises and rejects His religion? Is espionage or shedding blood worse than leaving the religion of the Lord of mankind and rejecting it?

(6) None of those who bleat about personal freedom and freedom of belief would put up with a neighbour’s child hitting their child or justify this as "personal freedom," so how can they justify leaving the true religion and rejecting the sharee’ah which Allaah revealed to teach mankind about His unity and bring justice and fairness to all?

We ask Allaah for safety and health. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad.
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It's fantastic that there's a growing number of Muslims and Islamic scholars who believe in freedom of religion and don't believe that apostates should be punished, but their views are not mainstream yet:
 
Not so much a ruling, but they refer to "waswas" a lot.
Now, "waswas" are supposedly things Satan whispers into your ears.
What can you expect from a religion where general doubt or questioning parts of your believe or the teachings are thought to be demons trying to fuck with you?
Their usual advice is to blindly and fervorly cling to Allah's words.

This might be a website from fundamentalists for fundamentalists, but that's just cray-cray.
 
The spongebob remark was my favorite, and from now on whenever anyone asks how something was achieved I will answer "Through Jihad!"

"So this Null has a website where everyone looks at weirdos, how did he acquire it? Through Jihad!"

Every religion seems to attract extremists, what does Islam have to say about dinosaurs, Earth's age and aliens?
 
The accidental killing part of the site is full of people submitting their awful parenting skills

https://islamqa.info/en/144583

Suffocating a baby with a cloth

https://islamqa.info/en/128479

Leaving a child alone and the stove managed to fall and crush the son when getting beard from it

https://islamqa.info/en/94903

Mom let a son go alone to a mosque and he fell and drowned in a pond

https://islamqa.info/en/71185

Mother gave her baby daughter butter cause had no milk and died from it

https://islamqa.info/en/10019

Mother put a bottle in a baby's mouth and then went to sleep and woke up and found the baby dead
 
Are Boob Jobs allowed?
https://islamqa.info/en/152086

Is Free Time allowed?
https://islamqa.info/en/47398
If time is so important, then the Muslim should not have any free time, for he should be going from one act of worship and obedience to another.
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A question by a "servant" (read: Slave) in Saudi Arabia who hasn't gotten any food or money from her "employers" (read: Masters) for the past three months she's been with them.
https://islamqa.info/en/198024

She is only able to get a small handful of food once in a while when they're not looking and only has gotten enough to be able to stand.
 
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Holy shit, no wonder Muslims are so fucking miserable. You're not even allowed to have a second to catch your breath in between rimming Allah and slapping your wife.
 
Is it allowed for Muslims to buy or sell Christmas presents?
It is not permissible for any Muslim to join in the festivals of the kuffaar, whether by attending the festivities or enabling them to hold their celebrations, or selling any goods or products that have to do with these festivals.
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https://islamqa.info/en/50074

Working as a Cashier for a store that sells pork is a sin
https://islamqa.info/en/169809

You can only be a lawyer if you use Sharia law as the deciding factor in every case. Otherwise you are sinning.
https://islamqa.info/en/42521

Sharia law btw is this.

You can only teach man-made laws if you explain to the students how Sharia law is superior to them.
https://islamqa.info/en/42950

Google AdSense is only allowed on your site if the ads don't go against Sharia law.
https://islamqa.info/en/101806

It is allowed for you to give your pre-puberty daughter to a stranger in marriage without their consent.
https://islamqa.info/en/178318
 
ICametoLurk said:
Is it allowed for Muslims to buy or sell Christmas presents?

https://islamqa.info/en/50074

Working as a Cashier for a store that sells pork is a sin
https://islamqa.info/en/169809

You can only be a lawyer if you use Sharia law as the deciding factor in every case. Otherwise you are sinning.
https://islamqa.info/en/42521

Sharia law btw is this.

You can only teach man-made laws if you explain to the students how Sharia law is superior to them.
https://islamqa.info/en/42950

Google AdSense is only allowed on your site if the ads don't go against Sharia law.
https://islamqa.info/en/101806

It is allowed for you to give your pre-puberty daughter to a stranger in marriage without their consent.
https://islamqa.info/en/178318
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So how many careers are being blocked off from Muslims who follow these rules by this point? Judging from shit like this, it's probably a very high number.
 
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