🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

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I clicked it. It's a database of movie scenes where characters are either shown or implied to be taking a shit. :cryblood:

So Sweet's shit-fetish is basically confirmed at this point.
 
Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
Greetings, Kiwis.

And congratulations on an utterly fascinating thread. I feel that I should not enjoy something so much without giving something in return, so here are a couple of tidbits that have not, IIRC, been adduced so far:

At the end of his short story, "The Second Mrs. Pecker," Mr. Sweet provides the following biographical information -- written in the third person, as usual -- at the end: "Sweet graduated in 1998 with a BA in English. In addition, he holds a BS in psychology from Mississippi County Commmunity [sic] College (now Arkansas Northeastern College). His extensive knowledge of psychology can be seen in many of his stories."

For those not conversant with the the system of higher education in the United States, community colleges do not award bachelor's degrees. Mississippi County Community College was no exception. Why would someone who is falsifying his CV claim to have a degree from an institution that doesn't award that degree? Why would someone attempting to inflate his CV claim a bogus degree from a fifth-tier community college in Arkansas? Very odd.

And then there's this: Me Goin' Hollywood, in which Mr. Sweet is described as being "currently in talks with Hollywood producers to adapt one of the six stories in his new collection Almasheol for a major motion picture." Read it and weep.

More research is needed on Mr. Sweet. I will do my part.
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Some community colleges in California are going to start offering BA/BS degrees, but this is a very new development. I wonder if he has an AS in psych and is lying about it being a BS, is too stupid to realize that "BA/BS" don't just mean "degree," or if he's just lying about the whole thing?

As for the Hollywood producers thing, I lol'd. Hard.
 
Picklechu said:
Some community colleges in California are going to start offering BA/BS degrees, but this is a very new development. I wonder if he has an AS in psych and is lying about it being a BS, is too stupid to realize that "BA/BS" don't just mean "degree," or if he's just lying about the whole thing?

As for the Hollywood producers thing, I lol'd. Hard.
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Iconclast has a PhD in being full of BS
 
If the choice is Sweets lying or telling truth, always bet on lie.

Pretty soon the niggos beat up my mom story will change from him cowering in a corner and then calling for help after it was all over, to Sweets heroically saving his mom from a whole gang of thugs while his drug addicted brother told him it was too dangerous.
 
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John Titor said:
I tried googling his screen name to see what other places he haunts.
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Good idea.

Mr. Sweet also seems to wander around the Internet as "J.M. Sweet," a persona apparently used for his more sophisticated and intellectual posts. (I kid.)

First finds were the following contributions to Urban Dictionary:

asscheddar
(1) Dried or cakey stool that accumulates in the butt hairs from inefficient wiping. (2) An unpleasant or difficult person.
That asscheddar ruined my life.
by J.M. Sweet February 22, 2004

monkeymunch
(n) (1) A male homosexual, esp. one who engages in oral sex. (2) A girl or woman who engages in oral sex with a boy or man.
I went to see that monkeymunch dean in judicial affairs last October.
by J.M. Sweet February 22, 2004

Is anyone surprised that in one case he makes up a word to describe a very specific form of human excrement and in the other drags in the dean of judicial affairs who expelled him from college?
 
I wonder just how much Sweet ruminates every single day over the events of half-past 1997, seeing as how he even drags that stuff into UD.
 
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Picklechu said:
Some community colleges in California are going to start offering BA/BS degrees, but this is a very new development. I wonder if he has an AS in psych and is lying about it being a BS, is too stupid to realize that "BA/BS" don't just mean "degree," or if he's just lying about the whole thing?
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That weird bio at the end of "The Second Mrs. Pecker" is the only place I've seen where he actually claims to have a BS in psychology. Everywhere else he implies that he has a degree in psychology by saying things like "graduated from ASU, where he studied psychology and English." It is possible that he attended community college for a year before going to ASU; he sometimes talks about his three years at Arkansas State, and he doesn't seem the type to graduate early. But Mississippi County Community College (or at least its successor institution) offers only two freshman-level courses in psychology -- not enough for an associate's degree, much less a BS.

Graduation records from public universities should be open records in Arkansas. I think I'll give the registrar at ASU a call.
 
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Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
asscheddar
(1) Dried or cakey stool that accumulates in the butt hairs from inefficient wiping.
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"cakey?"

"cakey?"

I... I...

See ... "cakey" isn't a word. It's ... I mean, if we are to conclude that "cakey" is being used as an adjective meaning " having the characteristics of or resembling cake", then we are also free to conclude that Jon Sweet has had experience with remnant stool at least one layer deep stuck in his "butt hairs".

And who knows how long they are!
 
autism420 said:
Not sure if you guys noticed this highschool picture of our hero:

1998h.jpg
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I have made a few notes while reading this thread and will be posting some observations and errata as I have time.

Good work by autism420 in tracking down the image. (It's not easy to find.) But there is one slight error in his description.

This is not Mr. Sweet in high school.

This is his photo from the 1998 edition of The Indian, the yearbook at Arkansas State University. That is how Mr. Sweet showed up to have his photo taken for the college annual during his senior year. (He graduated in the spring of '98. He was expelled from grad school in the fall of '98, according to my attempt to construct a timeline of his depravities.)

Here is a link to the page. Look at the other students. Flip backward and forward a few pages and look at more of the students. Mr. Sweet was quite obviously a seventh-sigma outlier at ASU, not only in the way he chose behave ("I'm creepy! Look at me! Look at ME!") but in the way he chose to appear ("I'm creepy! Look at me! Look at ME!"). If I had paid closer attention in my Abnormal Psych elective, I could probably put a scientific label on this behavior. As it is, my fading knowledge of psychopathological terminology forces me to diagnose his condition as "asshole."

Edit: Minor style fixes and correct chronology. Photo was taken when he was a senior, not a grad student.
 
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He Sets Me On Fire said:
And who knows how long they are!
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We're dealing with someone who freely admits to storing urine in jars on a windowsill here. Not really surprising. And now, I'm also curious if hygiene may have been a contributing factor towards Sweet's termination from the Herald.

Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
the way he chose to appear
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Sweet also appears to be wearing Cub Scout stuff. To college picture day. Cub Scouts usually ends around 12 or so. Also, could Sweet's career in Scouting have ended before reaching Boy Scouts, not unlike CWC?
 
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Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
I have made a few notes while reading this thread and will be posting some observations and errata as I have time.

Good work by autism420 in tracking down the image. (It's not easy to find.) But there is one slight error in his description.

This is not Mr. Sweet in high school.

This is his photo from the 1998 edition of The Indian, the yearbook at Arkansas State University. That is how Mr. Sweet showed up to have his photo taken for the college annual during his brutally truncated semester in grad school in the fall of 1997.

Here is a link to the page. Look at the other students. Flip backward and forward a few pages and look at more of the students. Mr. Sweet was quite obviously a seventh-sigma outlier at ASU, not only in the way he behaved ("Look at me! Look at ME!") but in the way he chose to appear ("Look at me! Look at ME!"). If I had paid closer attention in my Abnormal Psych elective, I could probably put a scientific label on this behavior. As it is, my fading knowledge of psychopathological terminology forces me to diagnose his condition as "asshole."
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I love everything about this post. Let me describe in detail what exactly I find amazing:

- He chose to take a picture looking like that for his college yearbook? Oh my fucking god that is UNREAL, I can't even imagine what combination of (the lack of) self-awareness and pure USDA Grade A 'tism goes into that sort of decision. I mean, that's how everyone at his school would remember him in the future, as would he himself. Everyone else on that page, and indeed in the whole yearbook (yes Virginia, I checked ;)) showed up for those pictures looking relatively normal, and here comes attention whoring Jon Thumb, wearing a stupid bandana, not having shaved or cut his damn hair, and wearing stupid sunglasses over his normal pedoglasses (look closely and you'll see it) and it's hard to not be completely blown away.

- You used the term "seventh-sigma outlier" to describe how abnormal and bizarre Thumbelina was, is and shall ever be. I love this, because I am a giant nerd. For those of you in the audience who may not be giant nerds, allow me to infect you with knowledge: the term refers to six sigma, a tool used (along with others) to eliminate defects in industrial and commercial processes. It's a statistical quality control concept, using said statistics to determine exactly what the margin of error should be in manufacturing, processing, and transactions. It allows you to improve by showing you how many of The Things You're Doing are incorrect, so you can Fix That Thing and thereby make certain that customers receive even more of That Thing You Send Them. The system only goes up to six because there should only (according to theory) be six deviations from the standard set by the company or organization.

As you can see, it's hilarious because Jon Sweet breaks loose from all previous error tracking, he exists outside of known possibility. @Dr. Merkwurdichliebe, I salute you, you incredible man you. :heart-full:

e: dont drink and post kids, or else you'll sperg about engineering
 
Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
Here is a link to the page. Look at the other students. Flip backward and forward a few pages and look at more of the students. Mr. Sweet was quite obviously a seventh-sigma outlier at ASU, not only in the way he behaved ("Look at me! Look at ME!") but in the way he chose to appear ("Look at me! Look at ME!"). If I had paid closer attention in my Abnormal Psych elective, I could probably put a scientific label on this behavior. As it is, my fading knowledge of psychopathological terminology forces me to diagnose his condition as "asshole."
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On a page full of relatively normal looking people, he sticks out like a...

Like a...

Damn, what was the expression? I feel like it should be really obvious for some reason.
 
Sweet outdoes Chris in the "clinging to the past" department. I mean, Chris's computer is relatively modern, he has a smartphone, he uses social media. He has a reasonable amount of technical proficency. Sweet probably breaks out into hives if he's exposed to anything made after 2000.
 
Dr. Merkwurdichliebe said:
Good idea.

Mr. Sweet also seems to wander around the Internet as "J.M. Sweet," a persona apparently used for his more sophisticated and intellectual posts. (I kid.)

First finds were the following contributions to Urban Dictionary:

asscheddar
(1) Dried or cakey stool that accumulates in the butt hairs from inefficient wiping. (2) An unpleasant or difficult person.
That asscheddar ruined my life.
by J.M. Sweet February 22, 2004

monkeymunch
(n) (1) A male homosexual, esp. one who engages in oral sex. (2) A girl or woman who engages in oral sex with a boy or man.
I went to see that monkeymunch dean in judicial affairs last October.
by J.M. Sweet February 22, 2004

Is anyone surprised that in one case he makes up a word to describe a very specific form of human excrement and in the other drags in the dean of judicial affairs who expelled him from college?
Click to expand...

If there were any two things that I could unread in my life... these would be them.
 
The_Iconoclast said:
Back in my newspaperman days, when I wrote a good column, the readers showed their appreciation with gifts. . . . I got two plastic drink bottles, the sort runners and athletes use . . . For my piece on using deposit bottles as currency on campus, I had pennies stuffed into the lock of my door, and I would literally have wealth showered at my feet every time I turned the key and opened it.
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I believe that even Iconoclast has now accepted that having pennies shoved into his door lock in order to disable it is an act of harassment, not generosity.

But it continues to surprise me that someone who admits to habitually peeing in jars and bottles regards receiving used bottles from strangers as some form of tribute. My bet is that before those bottles were delivered to Belchy they were no strangers to . . . well, I think you get the idea.

Bottoms up, Mr. Sweet!
 
Microupdate:

Still nothing substantial from Sweets since his last attempt at rallying the troops. He made a post on the site a few minutes ago but it's nothing more than some self-congratulatory crap about a comic page he did in April. It's such a nothing post that I wasn't going to say anything at all if it weren't for him finally breaking his radio silence on AJM Studios.
 
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