I started reading this thread a few days ago and I'm on page 100 or so. This guy is my favorite new cow for sure! It's so amazing how Chris bests him in nearly every conceivable aspect of his life. Chris is positively competent in comparison.
First of all, Sweetums, you look and sound OLD. When I first opened this thread, I judged you to be in your late 40s based on the way you write. I don't buy that IRL, you sound all that much younger when everything you say reeks of Reader's Digest's target demographic. Even if you somehow managed to trick some girl into thinking you were actually a college student (like maybe if it was really dark and she was drunk and also legally blind) all you have to do is open your mouth and let out one sentence containing the word "fartknocker" and she'll get the picture. It is really amazing how someone so obsessed with youth purposefully writes like a stereotypical old man. Speech can be a dead giveaway for age, I am not even that old and I still get called out sometimes for outdated slang, etc.
However, none of that really matters because you look old too. A wig is not going to help you at all because you have wrinkles like an old man. I knew a lot of college guys with receding hairlines (there's something about engineers and hair loss) but none with as many wrinkles on their face as you do.
One thing I saw on page 20 or so that was, hilariously, never really explained was Sweet describing an elementary school experiment where he put peanuts under a pyramid to see if they tasted better. In the 70s, there was briefly a "Pyramid Power" fad where people thought that pyramids had special preservation properties, which was believed to be the reason things in the Egyptian pyramids were so well preserved. People would do things like put razor blades under small home pyramids and claim the blades stayed sharp for longer. Pyramid power apparently applied to other things like food preservation and taste as well. This is just another example of Sweet sounding ridiculously old and out of touch without even realizing it.
Another thing that had been bothering me is his insistence on claiming he had "fans" in college. this is weird and creepy as fuck. The Pamela Anderson poster, the magazine - these sound like things FRIENDS would do. Not worshipers. Why do you need fans, Sweet? What's wrong with just having friends? Why do you feel you should be treated like a god? why won't just having normal relationships do?
When he does mention friends, he says they won't speak to him since the Herald incident. Plagiarism is shitty, but I can't see many of my friends dropping contact with me for plagiarizing something. What really happened?
I think Ashleigh was a real person lying about some things, and the phone sex happened at least once. From the timeline, they spoke on the phone for months and she peaced out within five minutes of meeting him which he blames on everything from talking about his dead father to his weird hat. But did she have any idea what he *looked* like before then? Their relationship took place over the phone in 1997; email, scanners and digital cameras were all uncommon. There is a good chance that she had no idea what Sweet looked like at all. So she rolls up, sees Thumbface looking like he crawled out of a Salvation Army donation bin with an animal stuck to his face and realizes she has made a huge mistake. I have no idea why Sweet is so adamant about "warning" college men about her when it is quite clear that her phone sex adventures ended roughly .1 seconds after this.
First of all, Sweetums, you look and sound OLD. When I first opened this thread, I judged you to be in your late 40s based on the way you write. I don't buy that IRL, you sound all that much younger when everything you say reeks of Reader's Digest's target demographic. Even if you somehow managed to trick some girl into thinking you were actually a college student (like maybe if it was really dark and she was drunk and also legally blind) all you have to do is open your mouth and let out one sentence containing the word "fartknocker" and she'll get the picture. It is really amazing how someone so obsessed with youth purposefully writes like a stereotypical old man. Speech can be a dead giveaway for age, I am not even that old and I still get called out sometimes for outdated slang, etc.
However, none of that really matters because you look old too. A wig is not going to help you at all because you have wrinkles like an old man. I knew a lot of college guys with receding hairlines (there's something about engineers and hair loss) but none with as many wrinkles on their face as you do.
One thing I saw on page 20 or so that was, hilariously, never really explained was Sweet describing an elementary school experiment where he put peanuts under a pyramid to see if they tasted better. In the 70s, there was briefly a "Pyramid Power" fad where people thought that pyramids had special preservation properties, which was believed to be the reason things in the Egyptian pyramids were so well preserved. People would do things like put razor blades under small home pyramids and claim the blades stayed sharp for longer. Pyramid power apparently applied to other things like food preservation and taste as well. This is just another example of Sweet sounding ridiculously old and out of touch without even realizing it.
Another thing that had been bothering me is his insistence on claiming he had "fans" in college. this is weird and creepy as fuck. The Pamela Anderson poster, the magazine - these sound like things FRIENDS would do. Not worshipers. Why do you need fans, Sweet? What's wrong with just having friends? Why do you feel you should be treated like a god? why won't just having normal relationships do?
When he does mention friends, he says they won't speak to him since the Herald incident. Plagiarism is shitty, but I can't see many of my friends dropping contact with me for plagiarizing something. What really happened?
I think Ashleigh was a real person lying about some things, and the phone sex happened at least once. From the timeline, they spoke on the phone for months and she peaced out within five minutes of meeting him which he blames on everything from talking about his dead father to his weird hat. But did she have any idea what he *looked* like before then? Their relationship took place over the phone in 1997; email, scanners and digital cameras were all uncommon. There is a good chance that she had no idea what Sweet looked like at all. So she rolls up, sees Thumbface looking like he crawled out of a Salvation Army donation bin with an animal stuck to his face and realizes she has made a huge mistake. I have no idea why Sweet is so adamant about "warning" college men about her when it is quite clear that her phone sex adventures ended roughly .1 seconds after this.
