🐱 How to Stop Gossip With Magic

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CatParty

We’ve all been the victim of slanderous words by others, and some of us have even been the perpetrator of gossip. Unfortunately, rumors spread fast. So what do we do when gossip about us starts spreading like wildfire? We turn to magic, of course.

By following these six witchy tips, we can stop the scandalous whispers from becoming more than minimal hearsay. Let’s face it: Words can hurt. These spells will help you take back your power.

Sweeten Up the Situation

Write down the name of the person who’s spreading false truths about you on a piece of paper. Put the name of the gossip in a glass of sugar water (which consists of one cup of water and one tablespoon of pure cane sugar). Place the sugar water with the paper in it by the window for a week, to let the sun shed its energy and light (ever heard the phrase “sunlight is the best disinfectant?) on the person and matter. The sugar water and sun will remove the negativity from the situation — and even help the truth come out.

Freeze them Out

Occultist Shawnte Cato has a simple magical fix to gossip: “Take a Ziplock bag and white sheet of paper with the name of the offender written in black ink. Place the name of the offender in the bag and fill it halfway with water. Put the bag in the freezer and do not remove it.” This spell will freeze the person who’s spreading rumors from continuing their actions, stopping them in their tracks.

Use Candle Magic and Herbs to Change the Dialogue

Color magic practitioner and tarot reader Sarah Potter recommends candle magic mixed with color magic to alter the gossipy vibe. Sarah suggests using “an Indigo candle for this spell [because] color is crucial as indigo has the correspondence of stopping the spread of lies and gossip. Carve the phrase ‘All Who Speak Ill of Me’ into your candle. Dress the candle with olive oil, black pepper, frankincense, and cloves. This mix of herbs will halt the gossip as well as add layers of protection to you. Light the candle. Let the candle burn out and your spell is complete!”
Be cautious with this one and all spells involving candles. They shouldn’t be left unattended while burning.

Flush the Drama Away. Literally.

Author of Green Witchcraft and host of the podcast “The Fat Feminist Witch,” Paige Vanderbeck, wants the victim of salty and false words to reclaim their power from the gossiper. Paige suggests taking “a square of toilet paper and a marker. Carefully draw a set of lips in the middle. Write your name and the name of the gossiper. Around the edges of the paper, write down some of the rumors going around about you and face the toilet bowl. Carefully rip out just your name, and throw the lips in the toilet.” While you flush them away, say the following “(Gossipers Name), keep my name out of your mouth. And let it fall on deaf ears. Keep my name out of your mouth and your nose out of my business. I reclaim my name, and banish yours.”

Crystallize the Situation.

Renee Watt, witch and co-host of “Two Psychicks” podcast recommends using fire agate to free your energy from gossip. It’s a great stone to carry around with you all day as a protective talisman. Renee explains that fire agate “creates a protective ring around its carrier, and engulfs any negativity in its fiery energy. It also lends one a sense of power, which will aid in overcoming any gossiping bully! Next time someone throws shade at you, grab this crystal! Remember your strength!”

Make Your Own Anti-Burn Book. Well, Sorta…

Sometimes it’s best to squash the energy. This means literally smoking it out of your orb. Witch, tarot reader, and host of “Mystic Witch Podcast” Blue June uses an old Gaelic spell from Eastern Ireland in such situations. Blue June says to “take a powdered clove, a red pen and a small piece of white paper. Write the name of the person slandering you backwards onto the paper with red ink. You can keep it general by writing, ‘Whoever disparages my name.’ Light a red seven-day candle, burn a bit of your clove at 7AM and again at 7PM every day for seven days. Then set the clove onto your paper and at the end, burn the paper in the candle. The gossiper will cease or will not be heard as a result.”
 
What a glorious time to live in when occult & mysticism bullshit gets published in "popular" magazines

An endless supply of silly articles :story:
 
If I was into magic I'd probably be doing like talk to the dead win the lottery summon a demon to possess some vapid cunt. not do a simple spell to stop bitches from acting like you know gossips? lol.
 
TFW niggas who stop gossip with bullets are better adjusted and more mature than these fucking people
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I love how trashy and lazy modern witches are. Picking herbs? Speaking Latin? Nah girl, get some ziplocs and kitchen spices.
 
Where are the worrywart moms that protested D&D and heavy metal for being Satanic now?

Also, no input from Mordenkainen or Criswell? RUDE.
“The Fat Feminist Witch,”
Is there any other kind?
 
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Color magic practitioner and tarot reader Sarah Potter
What's the over/under that this is an unofficial name change thanks to some childrens books and not the legal or birth name?
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Renee Watt, witch and co-host of “Two Psychicks” podcast recommends using fire agate to free your energy from gossip. It’s a great stone to carry around with you all day as a protective talisman. Renee explains that fire agate “creates a protective ring around its carrier, and engulfs any negativity in its fiery energy. It also lends one a sense of power, which will aid in overcoming any gossiping bully! Next time someone throws shade at you, grab this crystal! Remember your strength!”

You can overcome this talisman with a few ingredients: the smegma of a homeless man, a few pages of the book "The Goblet of Fire" (I forget which ones), the diarrhea of a 5 day old baby and a stable internet connection.
 
The only real magic that works is clipping out pictures from playboy or TV guide, writing your intentions with said woman on the picture and then yelling at the faggot men on television.
 
Maybe girls wouldn't have so much trouble being taken seriously in society if they quit playing childish make-believe shit like this.
 
I read the name too fast and thought the lady who runs Simply Sara's Kitchen went off the deep end.
Lily white girls talking like sassy negresses will never not be annoying.
Holy shit, yes. I am so tired of white girls from the suburbs tweeting shit like "periodt" and "we been knew". Where did this even come from?
 
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