How do men make friends as adults?

[Strawberryfarm]

Its also hard making friends as a woman.
Do guys think that we see a random woman and somehow we randomly become friends. Its more a personality thing women who are not as extroverted will have a hard time just like guys that are not as extroverted. Also men rarely take initiative, not just in creating male groups but in life in general. I dont know why, since the stereotype of being masculine is taking the lead and taking initiative. In real life you rarely see men do that lmao

Here s another take. You wont make friends as an adult. Get used to it. What does it make you then? A stranger among strangers, family aside. An immigrant in the country of your birth. Right? Just without the option that regular immigrants have (to go back to their home country).
Here s a piece on a Vietnamese man who made Senegal his home country. Its a bit more of an inspirational and motivational docu. Be like this man. A stranger among strangers. Or how to learn to swim in a sea of niggers.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=f7RVANi1rv0

So you think its funny to be a racist cunt.

 

[Butterschmalz]

So you think its funny to be a racist cunt.

Define racist cunt? Is it somebody who writes shit on the interwebs? Or is it somebody who actually goes out and hurts people? Or raises their rent or fires them from their jobs or denies them medical care?

 

[Shidoen]

You either have old friends or you don’t.

 

[Norbert the Tiger]

So you think its funny to be a racist cunt.

Truth is racist.

 

[PaleTay]

Its also hard making friends as a woman.
Do guys think that we see a random woman and somehow we randomly become friends. Its more a personality thing women who are not as extroverted will have a hard time just like guys that are not as extroverted. Also men rarely take initiative, not just in creating male groups but in life in general. I dont know why, since the stereotype of being masculine is taking the lead and taking initiative. In real life you rarely see men do that lmao

Well it's really simple, in your 20s if you're in any way an attractive woman you can get a job as a server or bartender and meet other attractive women who probably have similar interests. There's also social media fans, giving you a chance to do something cool and make new friends (not with your fans usually but brands will approach you). If you take care of yourself there's so many chances in your daily life, especially when you're younger to make and keep friends.

With guys it's only in recreation that you make friends. Maybe you work at a ski or surf shop, country club, or for your local sports team when you're 20 but otherwise you're searching for a beer league or high end gym. Even if you can work in festivals or movies, that only helps so much.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

>"Go where people of your hobbies gather"
Ah, gaming. Nerd culture. Generally being more introverted.
>Even niche Discords are full of onlythots grifters and porn-spamming femboys
Wow, this is horrible!

I honestly envy 40k folk. It's practically one of the last nerdy hobbies that require physical meet-ups which is to say it filters out symbolistic tourists.

This is one of the main ways guys over 30 make new friends, women are good at building social networks.

Meeting other men on your own isn't easy unless you are looking to bang them, the best options are to join something I guess. Local softball club, boxing gym, places where you can meet guys. Maybe get a part-time job as a way to meet the guys who work there all of this sounds very gay, but it's the best I can think of.

The reality is that women are good at being vague and surface-level friendly while dudes tend to stick to their personality (or be spineless slimey soyboys), so they either vibe well with or do not. And since you're likely to meet people through your girlfriend, she doesn't feel threatened cause notices how others flock to you and thus take pride in dating Mr Popular.

 

[Bartolomeow Kittensberger]

Join your local chapter of the Young Republicans. That's where I met my girlfriend, which is similar to a friend, except superior in every way.

The YRs will let you in at least up until age 35. Even if you're in your 40s, just smear some 20% concentration of glycolic acid on your face and strip those wrinkles right off. Once thirty seconds have passed, don't forget to neutralize the acid with baking soda!

 

[Kopasea]

I had this issue a few years ago when I moved across country (and then covid hit right after).

Here's what I ended up doing:
1. Join a church. if it's a really big one, join up in a small group. Be up front in your interests with the small group and if it's not for you, just try and find another one.
2. Volunteer. I volunteer at my church which allows for me to see people on the regular, but it could be basically anywhere.
3. Do an activity that involves others. Golfing can mean you end up joining another group. Basketball, shooting, cigar lounges.

Good luck!

 

[Flea Man Marbles]

You don't.

 

[₲litches]

Its also hard making friends as a woman.
Do guys think that we see a random woman and somehow we randomly become friends. It’s more a personality thing women who are not as extroverted will have a hard time just like guys that are not as extroverted. Also men rarely take initiative, not just in creating male groups but in life in general. I dont know why, since the stereotype of being masculine is taking the lead and taking initiative. In real life you rarely see men do that lmao

I agree that women don’t have it “easy” making friends as adults, but men do have a harder time. Adults have schedules and obligations. Maintaining friendships takes time and attention that is in sort supply for working and/or family-raising adults.
But with men, there are social stigmas on top of that. I don’t think men prioritize friendships and community-building like women do, and that’s a shame. I’d like to see that change.

I work in geriatrics. One phenomenon you see often is a couple that’s been married for decades - if the man dies first, the widow mourns and her children or friends come out of the woodwork to hold her hand and listen. If the wife passes first though? The men just wither - they may have family or friends visit, but the widower just locks up and is unable to share that burden, so the visitors stop coming. Their wives were the only socially acceptable outlet for them to fully share emotions with. They don’t know how to lean on anyone else and share that burden, and it kills them. The men who I’ve seen withstand that are the ones who were former bikers, or fishing enthusiasts who had a men’s breakfast club, or were active in organizing church functions or whatever. They may have just had surface-level hobby friends their whole lives, but when the shit hits the fan, some friend will step up and share a similar experience, and suddenly the widower isn’t so alone.

That’s the older generation, but still. We’re more isolated than ever with less people going into to churches and moose lodges and playing bridge together or whatever. I think everyone should put a little extra effort into IRL friendships for mental health.

 

[Sarn’t]

They join the military
no joke I met a really good pal in the marine corps who joined mainly to meet people to hang out with

 

[melty]

I see a lot of meetup groups that are mainly men.
Tabletop games
Retro gaming
Makerspaces
Retro PCs
Minifig games (Warhammer, etc)
D&D

Lots of geek stuff, of course it's also packed with troons and annoying women, but the more niche or STEM it is tends to be more male.

 

[Simon Kaggwa Njala]

It helps that people who smell are quickly pointed out

I honestly envy 40k folk. It's practically one of the last nerdy hobbies that require physical meet-ups which is to say it filters out symbolistic tourists.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

This fucking thread is still going?

If you’re in your 30s and don’t have IRL friends by then, you probably won’t.

 

[56 others]

Buy a motorcycle and then go for a ride anytime you start to feel boohoo about being friendless

 

[Law]

I honestly envy 40k folk.

Join us.
Find your local game store and buy a box of whatever models look cool. GW has a bunch of fun skirmish games out now so you only have to build and paint like 5 guys instead of a whole army, so it's quicker and cheaper to get ready to play. A lot of stores also have hobby nights so you can build and paint your guys at the store and talk to other people who are building and painting.
Don't worry about the rules being complicated or losing games. I played completely wrong for like a solid year when I first started. I've met so many people through 40k and miniatures games.

 

[56 others]

Join us.
Find your local game store and buy a box of whatever models look cool. GW has a bunch of fun skirmish games out now so you only have to build and paint like 5 guys instead of a whole army, so it's quicker and cheaper to get ready to play. A lot of stores also have hobby nights so you can build and paint your guys at the store and talk to other people who are building and painting.
Don't worry about the rules being complicated or losing games. I played completely wrong for like a solid year when I first started. I've met so many people through 40k and miniatures games.

Kill team Is a lot of fun, and you can meet some neat people. Never really fit in with the nerds at my game store, and then they started bringing their "girl"friends in. Changed jobs and couldn't go anymore, maybe I should show up again

 

[Law]

Never really fit in with the nerds at my game store, and then they started bringing their "girl"friends in.

Sometimes you have to journey far to find a good store. One of my friends drives 3 hours for his.

 

[Spud]

Its also hard making friends as a woman.
Do guys think that we see a random woman and somehow we randomly become friends. Its more a personality thing women who are not as extroverted will have a hard time just like guys that are not as extroverted. Also men rarely take initiative, not just in creating male groups but in life in general. I dont know why, since the stereotype of being masculine is taking the lead and taking initiative. In real life you rarely see men do that lmao

Men struggling to make friends. Women most affected

 

[Sneksual Healing]

You don't
As a grown man, you shouldn't be focused on finding dipshits who like the same diversions as you.
You should be focused on improving yourself and finding a woman who will be everything you need.
After you've done that, you and your new best friend should focus on forming babby.
Once you've done all of the above, you can find other couples with children who share your values and want to do fun family things together.
Build a family and a community instead of trying to find other men to essentially date. Anything else is a gay distraction for over socialized man-children.

"Hewp me find mi fwens"