How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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I found this penis shaped Cheeto last year and I'm still thinking about it. I ended up just throwing it out not realizing it may even be worth some money. I take the good times for granted. I don't value what I have in the fleeting moments I have them.
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Ygolonac said:
I found this penis shaped Cheeto last year and I'm still thinking about it. I ended up just throwing it out not realizing it may even be worth some money. I take the good times for granted. I don't value what I have in the fleeting moments I have them.
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wtf, why did your cheeto-penis have pubes on it, that's a dirty looking cheeto-penis
 
After being out of work for nearly 3 whole weeks (only coming in for 2 part days) I feel an intense overwhelming shame about showing back up tomorrow. I fear being mocked or belittled, or even worse being doubted. I wish I had truly been lying so that my shame was warranted but alas. I am feeling so avoidant that I took today off as an end stone just to have one day of feeling good in nearly a month to myself. I'll be back in tomorrow regardless with all the papers I need to prove my issues weren't lies but I just can't shake the shame of not toughing it out.
 
TotalNematodeDeath said:
After being out of work for nearly 3 whole weeks (only coming in for 2 part days) I feel an intense overwhelming shame about showing back up tomorrow. I fear being mocked or belittled, or even worse being doubted. I wish I had truly been lying so that my shame was warranted but alas. I am feeling so avoidant that I took today off as an end stone just to have one day of feeling good in nearly a month to myself. I'll be back in tomorrow regardless with all the papers I need to prove my issues weren't lies but I just can't shake the shame of not toughing it out.
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They are not paying you enough to care that much about what they think, or to just "tough it out" if you have a pressing problem. ie health issues, major life events

I'm getting by.
I've been at the hospital with my wife for three days. She's very sick, but hopefully getting better. I have not slept over fifteen minutes at a time, and even now that I'm at home for a few hours, I'm way too anxious to sleep. It'll work out.
 
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I finished writing the first draft of my book, but I don't feel accomplished or really anything at all. If anything I feel worse than I did before I finished. I know it's not "complete" in the sense of wanting to try and show too many people yet but was expecting at least some kinda boost I guess. To me it just feels like 'cool I have a conclusion to my insane ramblings' and not 'this is something people would actually want to read'. I have like one person I know IRL I would trust with critique but they don't really seem that enthused. Feels really weird to pester someone to read my drivel. So, yeah, just feelin no bueno.
 
Yea nah dog this job is fucked. Second time they did the "maybe you shouldn't be here, and if so maybe I shouldn't". There is no world in which I'll ever satisfy them. I could wake up Bruce Almighty and do everything perfectly and there'd still be issues. I work in the public sector where people just move around to solve drama and seemingly that applies to this workplace too, but I've no idea how to draw upon that white office woman entitlement. On the other hand, I could just dig my heels in and toughen it out. I won't get fired.

TotalNematodeDeath said:
After being out of work for nearly 3 whole weeks (only coming in for 2 part days) I feel an intense overwhelming shame about showing back up tomorrow
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Meanwhile if you showed up sick on an understaffed day at my old work, you'd get kicked home. I'm hearing tales from old coworkers of those just about to get fired and man, they had sick days twice a week. Some would call in sign the day they left for holiday, meaning they didn't spend PTO on that holiday. Ruthless hustlers.

BallsGuevara said:
They are not paying you enough to care that much about what they think, or to just "tough it out" if you have a pressing problem. ie health issues, major life events
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And this is where my mind is at about my own situation. I meet up, I get yelled at, I get a decent pay, I eventually fuck off. I have adjacent coworkers who're tradesmen who worked concrete, boating, electrician, industrial machinery, all on the same 3 year education from 30 years ago. I don't regret university but man, the joy of just working with and breaking your hands instead of these office mindgames.
 
Reversal said:
I finished writing the first draft of my book, but I don't feel accomplished or really anything at all. If anything I feel worse than I did before I finished. I know it's not "complete" in the sense of wanting to try and show too many people yet but was expecting at least some kinda boost I guess. To me it just feels like 'cool I have a conclusion to my insane ramblings' and not 'this is something people would actually want to read'. I have like one person I know IRL I would trust with critique but they don't really seem that enthused. Feels really weird to pester someone to read my drivel. So, yeah, just feelin no bueno.
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post it or pussy.
 
⋖ cørdion ⋗ said:
Meanwhile if you showed up sick on an understaffed day at my old work, you'd get kicked home. I'm hearing tales from old coworkers of those just about to get fired and man, they had sick days twice a week. Some would call in sign the day they left for holiday, meaning they didn't spend PTO on that holiday. Ruthless hustlers.
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The thing that fucks with me is being believed, work believes me and I've gotten multiple messages even from HR wishing for a speedy recovery. A dark part of me wants to be called a liar and I don't know why beyond feeling shame about the whole thing. I've always been one to cut out days when I felt like it but with this job I wanted to change that, become an important member of the team and all that. I guess I feel like I failed even though for once the sick days weren't fraudulent.
 
I need money. Not to do anything with it, just save and look at it in my bank account/investments.
Also I'm not doing my college work or going to the gym like I'm supposed to, just rotting. Fuck my stupid chud life. I'm doing a 6x PPL and I do 3 days, take a day off then never go back. I should probably just push myself for a straight 6 days a week then 1 day at the end instead of 3 on 1 off.
 
Ygolonac said:
I left it on my desk for several weeks before I took this photo and eventually tossed it in the trash. It's probably facial hair.
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Is that why it's green and molding
SOLDIER OF WALES said:
Not to do anything with it, just save and look at it in my bank account/investments.
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Real.
Reversal said:
I finished writing the first draft of my book, but I don't feel accomplished or really anything at all. If anything I feel worse than I did before I finished. I know it's not "complete" in the sense of wanting to try and show too many people yet but was expecting at least some kinda boost I guess. To me it just feels like 'cool I have a conclusion to my insane ramblings' and not 'this is something people would actually want to read'. I have like one person I know IRL I would trust with critique but they don't really seem that enthused. Feels really weird to pester someone to read my drivel. So, yeah, just feelin no bueno.
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You've done better than most, you did something you wanted to do. Do you have any clue how little people do that?

Good news and bad news. Bad news first. So, I was in my theatre class and we were working with slapsticks. The sound of the slap brought me back to my childhood, and I froze up. I was biting the inside of my cheek so hard. Even when we moved on from the sticks, I was still frantically looking behind my back and couldn't say a word. We were doing some stretches and seeing everyone raise their hands towards me broke me, I ran into the dressing room and began crying. Good news, a lot of people checked up on me, and that honestly made me feel very appreciated. I CAN'T let the teacher knows the slapsticks "trigger" me, I really really really want to stay in this class.

Furthermore, should I get checked for something? I always do that whenever I hear repeated loud smack sounds, unless they're like in fiction like a video game. I've always ignored it but it only now dawned on me I probably shouldn't. One of the people checking on me mentioned "PTSD" but I doubt I have that cause iirc that's really fucking rare and only happens to like war vets. I just had a shitty childhood.
 
Lost money at the blowjob table. Rats fuckin rigging the game to the point I was almost gonna fuck- ah dewd
 
Getmeout said:
I have to ask for a refill but I'm too lazy to.
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Please do. And be on schedule with your meds. Skipping them and then going back on them can really fuck one up. If you want to be off of them or change them, find out how to taper safely, please. And keep your MD involved. Gaps in prescriptions are not a good thing.
 
SOLDIER OF WALES said:
I need money. Not to do anything with it, just save and look at it in my bank account/investments.
Also I'm not doing my college work or going to the gym like I'm supposed to, just rotting. Fuck my stupid chud life. I'm doing a 6x PPL and I do 3 days, take a day off then never go back. I should probably just push myself for a straight 6 days a week then 1 day at the end instead of 3 on 1 off.
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Oh yeah, also the housing bubble isn't big enough for my liking. House has "only" accumulated 11k in value in the past 18 months. (according to zillow atleast). I missed the COVID explosion. I need to get out so I can get a shittier house with a better payment lol
 
JanuaryViolet said:
Please do. And be on schedule with your meds. Skipping them and then going back on them can really fuck one up. If you want to be off of them or change them, find out how to taper safely, please. And keep your MD involved. Gaps in prescriptions are not a good thing.
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Thanks for the reminder, you're right, I really shouldn't be messing around with this,
 
Every time I think I'm doing ok and feeling better something makes me realize that normal people are independent, and living full lives doing things I couldn't even imagine were possible. It fills me with such existential dread at how I've wasted my whole life that the cycle repeats itself. There really is so much more out there, life is beautiful, and I don't think I'll ever experience any of it.
 
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