How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[Motherf*cker]

It was super fawking cold out today and tomorrow too.

 

[owed to joy]

Montana is beautiful but then again so was Oregon and California long ago.

It was super fawking cold out today and tomorrow too.

It's 6 degrees F here. I let the stray cats camp out in my garage this weekend.

 

[Banquet Meal]

i bought my husband this "life sized" facehugger, and he likes it, so thats nice.
ive decided im going to stop worrying all the fucking time. its doing no good at all, and im missing out on living in the meantime.
this opinion is subject to change at pretty much any given moment, but im going to enjoy it while it lasts i guess

 

[boustrophedon]

I woke up with a headache today.

 

[Banquet Meal]

also, after much bragging about how ive been able to get away with saying "nigger" on facebook for well over a year with zero repercussions...i managed to catch a month long ban because i told someone i hope they get ran over by a truck. keep in mind i also called this person a huge faggot, but that was ok, i guess the wishing death part was a bridge too far....

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

Doesn't it feel like complete madness out there?

Still quietly going crazy. I've been really reading into quantum leaping and multiverse theory.

Have you looked into Tartaria? I think that is what might be the deepest rabbit hole so far. Look into what the cabbage patch kids really were.

Fucking.. mood, man. Mood. Minus the autism, but I could definitely be considered neurodivergent.
The lack of aim is killing me. I feel like I have goals on behalf of others, and their expectations of me. I'm a puzzle piece from the wrong puzzle.

I hope there's a solution for our problem that won't be seen as selfish to others. Not suicide necessarily, imagine being able to run away from whichever country you're in and going to some place remote, like Alaska or Svalbard. Be a hermit and live a life that's fulfilling to you and only you.

It is all goals on behalf of others. We do what others want us to do - not what we want to do. Because we are lost and unhappy, because we are indecisive on what to do, they dig their tendrils in and drive us to do things we rather not do.

Being a hermit in a remote part of the world would probably be the best thing for people like us. The problem is the world is so small and there really is no place to run now.

I feel suicide is selfish as well, that is why I hope to die from something out of my control, you probably feel the same way.

Maybe you have chronic depression. I know how you feel since I have that issue as well. Get diagnosed and have a treatment whenever posible.
But that won't be enough to get you better. This will sound corny as shit, but the reasons to live are the all the small pleasures on life. Doing big and "important" shit won't make you happy, as you'll never seen a nobel price winner happy all the time. Things like a mere moment of calm can be celebrated and enjoyed.
Another thing is purpose, but focus on feeling better first.

Chronic depression is likely.

I'm sorry you are in the same state. Did treatment help you at all? A life of big pharma is all that they recommend for us isn't it?

The small pleasure in life for me would be not working. But I am trapped in the wage cage. Without freedom I cannot appreciate anything.

Yes... we lack purpose. We as men need it desperately. We have been told we are worthless and we have been tossed into the gutter.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

Yes... we lack purpose. We as men need it desperately. We have been told we are worthless and we have been tossed into the gutter.

The essence and goal of man/ humanity is finding one's own purpose and applying oneself to it. And purpose is not the absence of something; it is an affirmative doing something.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

The essence and goal of man/ humanity is finding one's own purpose and applying oneself to it. And purpose is not the absence of something; it is an affirmative doing something.

But for men it is the absence of something.

We are meant to run tribal nations, build tribal nations, defend tribal nations in war.

Everything we used to do is now done by the Jews or shitskins.

Women don't need us.

We are told we are worthless and we are left to rot on our lonesome in a hostile alien world.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

Learn some kind of skilled trade* that allows you to earn a semi decent living and remember this is the START, not the pinnacle of your success. When you can house, feed, and clothe yourself (and anyone you are actually responsible for), THEN you can study whatever obscure subject that is your passion. You will actually BE useful, and you will have a decent job, plus a thorough knowledge of 12thCentury basketmaking in Wessex, or whatever the hell floats your boat.

You say that but I've sat on the sideline of friends becoming truckers, carpenters, electricians and what not, and not a single one of them had an easy time getting a foot in, and once they finally did, 2-3 short-lived jobs later, they end up sitting in an office arranging those of less experience driving around to gigs.

No matter what you end up doing in life, it's pure rng whether you end up doing it at all. The amount of threads I've read where people go "My education was social services and now I'm doing lead marketing" type shit. Nothing is guaranteed and at this point, the sheer concept of studying a thing and then working that thing, given you're not living in "all we got is oil" type backwater states of the US, is a meme. At one point I even considered getting a lowly 2-year office education, only to be told not to by basically everyone cause they're in abundance And now I'm doing office work with an irrelevant degree. It's all fucked.

 

[Overwritten Tapes]

Solid. A company wants to hire me for a risky job and tried to lowball me, so I overshot, now am waiting for middle ground. If not, fuck them, I got options

 

[DenseDeerFather]

It's snowing again and it's cold as balls so I built a snowman per tradition

John Wicked Snow

 

[Rekeita's Kidneys]

I am 99% convinced I have ADD and it's fucking ruining my goddamned life.

How the hell do you fix executive dysfunction? I just want to get things DONE. I have so many projects and things I need to do for myself or my family and I just... Slack so damned hard.
I spent fucking 20 minutes scrolling my steam library just to end up wasting more time on the internet lmfao. How is picking a fucking GAME such a task

I have to-do lists but goddamn am I slacking.

Any of you figure out the cheat code or some bullshit? Any other ADD sufferers?

 

[Ryo Ma]

I am 99% convinced I have ADD and it's fucking ruining my goddamned life.

How the hell do you fix executive dysfunction? I just want to get things DONE. I have so many projects and things I need to do for myself or my family and I just... Slack so damned hard.
I spent fucking 20 minutes scrolling my steam library just to end up wasting more time on the internet lmfao. How is picking a fucking GAME such a task

I have to-do lists but goddamn am I slacking.

Any of you figure out the cheat code or some bullshit? Any other ADD sufferers?

Adderall helps

 

[DenseDeerFather]

I am 99% convinced I have ADD and it's fucking ruining my goddamned life.

How the hell do you fix executive dysfunction? I just want to get things DONE. I have so many projects and things I need to do for myself or my family and I just... Slack so damned hard.
I spent fucking 20 minutes scrolling my steam library just to end up wasting more time on the internet lmfao. How is picking a fucking GAME such a task

I have to-do lists but goddamn am I slacking.

Any of you figure out the cheat code or some bullshit? Any other ADD sufferers?

I'm currently medicated myself. Otherwise eveything around me would be a hurricane of disorganization. Not Adderall though: Concerta rather

 

[Motherf*cker]

My stomach has been balls for three days now, and it fucking sucks. Sometimes when I'm this nauseous I have the option of ginger (which I do put in all my food but is very limited in how much it helps), gravol or weed.
Weed actually helps the most with nausea especially in the form of an edible, and I happen to have cannilean which tastes exactly like Bubbalicious.

 

[stick]

Any of you figure out the cheat code or some bullshit? Any other ADD sufferers?

I am not medicated as I respond poorly to most meds, especially stimulants, so I have some tips of questionable value. It's just how I've adapted to my retarded brain and keep in mind I am in no way thriving.

The most important thing for me is forward momentum. It is a lot easier to keep something in motion moving than it is to start something up again once it's stopped, or however it goes. I see a lot of tips online like "work for an hour, then set a 10 minute break timer " and I say fuck that. I know the purpose of the breaks is to avoid getting tired and burned out but that just doesn’t work for me. Once I've stopped it's easy to sit on my ass doing whatever is more appealing to me. I can ignore a timer, why wouldn't I? I'm not going to pretend that I'm disciplined.

Work before play. I keep my phone off, my computer off, my TV off. Anything that is easy to distract cannot be near me. I have tried using background TV noise to entertain me and it just doesn't work. I don't even do podcasts. I allow myself music and that is it. Plus my brain is already hardwired to make me an iPad baby, I don't want to make it worse so I take my boring chores as a chance to give my already short attention span a rest. I also like to get up pretty early and get to work, I feel like I've wasted the day otherwise. I am a morning person by nature though.

I also write everything down. I don't even mean that I plan out my day, or make to-do lists, or keep a calendar. This is going to make me sound like a crazy person but on my most productive days I will basically document almost every action I've taken. For example I get up and make coffee. I go to my notebook and write "made coffee" and cross it off, as if it were an item on a to-do list. I brush my teeth and write down "brushed teeth," I walk my dog and write "walked dog" etc etc. I don't know why this does anything for me but it just does. I'd guess it makes me feel like I'm actually doing something as I see the list grow naturally, even if I'm working kinda aimlessly. Big to-do lists that I make ahead of time stress me too much so I've found this compromise.

Basically, lock yourself into an isolation chamber and do all the shit you need to do first thing and accept that your brain is dumb sometimes and find ways to work around it rather than trying to brute force "proper ways." To be completely honest, though, I don't think all of my methods are very healthy or sustainable as I am in a constant loop of keeping this system up for a few days then falling apart again, but it's the only way I've managed to be somewhat functional.

 

[long waters]

Ever since I was born I've lacked the ability to get any positive chemical feedback from doing anything in life and I'm very autistic. I just follow the steps I have to follow to complete the day and then I repeat it all over again, again and again, for no reason what so ever.

If you don't have any drive to do anything, and you get nothing out of life, then it's a mindless hollow experience.

I just want this madness to end and I want to rest in peace.

Fucking.. mood, man. Mood. Minus the autism, but I could definitely be considered neurodivergent.
The lack of aim is killing me. I feel like I have goals on behalf of others, and their expectations of me. I'm a puzzle piece from the wrong puzzle.

I hope there's a solution for our problem that won't be seen as selfish to others. Not suicide necessarily, imagine being able to run away from whichever country you're in and going to some place remote, like Alaska or Svalbard. Be a hermit and live a life that's fulfilling to you and only you.

This is all very relatable... I don't know if I've ever had any strong long term ambitions, or rather, perhaps it's that I lack the confidence to allow myself to have any? I definitely have some goals, but at the same time I feel like I'm not putting in enough effort towards them. I've always been afraid of success about as much as failure. When you succeed at stuff, people just expect even more from you and it's tiresome. Sometimes I wish I could just disappear, not in a kys kind of way since that leaves behind consequences for friends and family, but just have it be like I never existed in the first place.

How the hell do you fix executive dysfunction? I just want to get things DONE. I have so many projects and things I need to do for myself or my family and I just... Slack so damned hard.

Also very relatable. It always seems like I start something then halfway through I get distracted and start doing something else and it's like a vicious cycle.

Any of you figure out the cheat code or some bullshit? Any other ADD sufferers?

Idk if I have ADD or anything, never got diagnosed for anything, but for me it's been caffeine and what stick is saying here:

The most important thing for me is forward momentum. It is a lot easier to keep something in motion moving than it is to start something up again once it's stopped, or however it goes. I see a lot of tips online like "work for an hour, then set a 10 minute break timer " and I say fuck that. I know the purpose of the breaks is to avoid getting tired and burned out but that just doesn’t work for me. Once I've stopped it's easy to sit on my ass doing whatever is more appealing to me. I can ignore a timer, why wouldn't I? I'm not going to pretend that I'm disciplined.

And speaking of caffeine I find that energy drinks are more effective than just straight coffee, but at the same time I've been avoiding them lately. Trying to find a way to motivate myself without relying on them.

 

[YHWH's Strongest Soldier]

How the hell do you fix executive dysfunction?

Stress and peer pressure combined with the awareness of failure's consequences. Your negative emotions have a function and intrinsic motivation does not always need a positive source. Just don't overdo on it or you'll start hating your work. If that doesn't work, there's always Adderall, but I've never seen anyone work with it for a prolonged time without burning out or having a minor mental breakdown.

Ultimately, I'd also recommend reflecting whether your to-do list consists of things that you actually need to do. If it doesn't carry any consequences, maybe not.

 

[Otterly]

but i don't know how i can make it into a surprise without asking/measuring her fucking ring finger size.

You find a jeweller that does repairs, or you buy a cheap ring sizer off Amazon like this wand thing in the middle: you then pinch one of her existing rings and measure it. Note! If it’s a very thick ring, it’ll be a slightly larger size needed to it being a thin band so try to use a ring that’s the right finger for her and a similar width to what you’ll buy. What a lovely idea!

just want this madness to end and I want to rest in peace.

Then you need to find peace. What’s peace for you? A place, or a process? Perhaps it might help to find ‘a thing’ that you can throw yourself into that gets you into that flow state. Build something. Carve a chunk of wood into a coffee table or make vases on a lathe. Working with my hands on something absorbing is something i find very soothing and I don’t get to do enough of it because I have no blocks of time for peaceful deep thought. Work and family fragment my attention and I can manage that hit family but not for work and family - it’s made me very stressed. But go pick up a dremel and a block of wood or something , ANYTHING that you can work with your hands on.
We all need purpose and the world at the moment is pretty cruel and stops us from finding it, instead diverting us to slave for others. Take a bit of that back

Women don't need us.

I do understand that society as a whole is very much pushing that idea, but as a certified true and honest women, I don’t find it’s true personally. But if also say that don’t look to anyone else to save you - contentment from within first. That’s a very big ask, I’ve not managed it either, so I’m a hypocrite.
And when you feel bad, go look at the SRS thread and read a few pages and be happy in the knowledge that you are in fact doing orders of magnitude better than the denizens therein

 

[The Feline Solution 2]

snip

Top stuff! It would've never occured to me to do it this way! Thanks! Now i need to see how hard i am going to get fucked by the current gold prices, i completely forgot that they surged to high heavens a week or so ago and are at a historical high.