How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[Nick Obre]

Several things

-I'm fucking pissed off. I'm a translator who works mainly with one company, but I've worked with several over the years. One was a company from Spain (for context, I'm not in or from Spain) specializing in game localization. Last year, they stopped paying me, and when pressed, they told me they were going out of business and were trying to find a way to pay. They didn't. They said lawyers were involved and that I'd be notified when something came out of it. Then they stopped answering entirely. They owed me around 12 hundred Euro.
Yesterday I get an email from their lawyer saying the process is closed. I ask what am I supposed to do, and point out this is the first time I hear about anything since they stopped answering. They replied that the process had been posted officially for everyone to see, and that I had time to enter my claims in court but hadn't. How could I know? I wasn't notified as I should have, being a creditor of the company, and not being in Spain I had no way to find out or enter my claim.
What's more, the court decided that only entities who were owed at least 5% of the total worth of the company and its assets could enter a claim to be paid. And it turns out that's almost 100 times more than what I was owed.

So I was fucked from the start.
I had already given up on the 12 hundred Euro, but this makes me angrier. A company fucks up its finances and doesn't pay? It sucks, it's shit, but yeah companies are assholes. THE COURTS decide Nah you get fucked, now that's some fucking shit.
The lawyer said I can take action but I'll have to contact some other lawyer in Spain and cover whatever costs that process takes, for my measly 12 hundred Euro. Not worth it.
I could ask the woman I'm seeing (who is a lawyer, and lived in Spain for a time) for advice, and probably will, but it's clear pursuing anything would be a waste of time, energy, and money, with no guarantee of any success.

-Oh yeah, as of late I've been seeing a woman who is a lawyer, but also and more importantly, even a bigger rock-head than I am. She's cool. I don't get my hopes up but it'd be nice if it worked. She seems pretty hype about me too, but that's happened and fizzled out with others before, so.

-After Dog's accident a couple months ago (he's anxious about being alone, tried to escape, broke a window and hurt himself horribly with the glass and the metal window protections, he's ok now; for details see my posts in this thread around November), I've been very apprehensive about leaving him alone. I only leave him in the front yard for up to 15 minutes, and if I have to leave for longer, I plan around having my kid stay with him. He doesn't need like being watched all the time, just having someone in the house reassures him.

But I can't live like this forever. There may be an emergency that requires me to move fast; I want to go out with Kid sometimes; I want to go out with the rock-lady without having to get Kid to stay with him. And so on.

So I've been talking to a dog behavior expert, she said it's a long process to realign his behavior, but for the short term, she recommended some medication. Not natural calming crap, those pills and scents and shit, that does nothing. This is some actual antidepressant/anti-anxiety shit that supposedly helps them calm down a lot (and a doctor during the recovery process from the accident actually gave me a prescription for it, so that I could try it out on Dog when he was back to proper health). I have to test the dosage, though, so today I tried the initial dose they recommended, and... I think he was a bit woozy for a little while, and he reacted slightly less than he does normally when I went to the nearby shop and came back. It might work? Maybe he needs more? I'll try again some other day

-Trying to get my payment rates up. I haven't done it in years, so the companies better accept an adjustment, I'm not asking for anything crazy, Wish me luck.

-Sneed.

Not too good, thanks for asking. My mega super fine girlfriend just called it quits on me and left last night after saying she cheated on me with her physically abusive ex. I knew it was coming, and I know her choices arent my fault. It still sucks though. maybe if i'd just been better, something something blaming myself here.

Goes a bit beyond "it's not your fault". She's a straight up retard. She didn't want better, hell you were better, but she wanted abusive retardation.

I know it hurts right now but don't trouble yourself with someone like her.

 

[Banquet Meal]

Has anyone heard from @WASR96 in the last few days? I seriously hope he's ok and just living his best possible life under the circumstances.

i hope so too.

 

[WhoBusTank69]

Now? Out the door day to next if the numbers stand to benefit. And yet, the public sector has this weird circlejerk aspect where they just move people around internally, wasting external applications, cause uhhh someone is being bullied!

I hear about the usual mix of no-call no-shows and complaints about new people taking a while to learn the ropes while the coworkers who have 10+ years in the company being absolutely terrible and somehow still sticking around. I couldn't imagine how shitty getting into the trades can be now if basic bitch customer service or, god forbid, retail is being fucking gatekept from the average Joe or Jane.

 

[Endless Blabbery]

Hello.

My retarded ass may have over-watered the fucking plant.

It appears I just had to let the plant take in some sunlight and not over-water it. It is so low-maintenance that my hyperactive ass cannot tolerate that. Anyway, all's good for now...

Despite only ever being proven wrong, I'm still ever-hopefully a chick will show up in a space I frequent and not be insufferable. And they probably do, cause they don't flaunt the fact. Otherwise, I've been in some of the most hyper-niche spaces with the odd woman showing up and they'd either demand all the attention, exercise pick-me behavior or just.. act female. I don't dislike women, I think they're just more likely to act a certain way, as are men, and it's one I don't mesh with. I feel like women are always ready to pull the plug the second you 'ick' them. "Oh you must be a creep-" is the exact female gut-reaction I've come to expect. Nah I've blown up at dude friends a lot and never fear the block-remove combo. It's a bitch move, literally.

Trust me, I know what you mean. Unfortunately for me, I also know what some men act like: loud and obnoxious, know nothing about personal boundaries and just pressure everyone to do whatever he wants or he throws a tantrum. Again, not-all-men and not-all-women but, still. You get it.
I have had trouble dealing with friendships that involve more than two people. It's the same old story—two or more members of the group liking each other more as compared to how much they like you so you end up segregated, consciously or otherwise; maybe there's some internal drama, as it tends to happen when one particular member is annoying as shit but no one's willing to be straightforward about the risk they pose.
So I just talk to people one-on-one. It's surprising, the amount of "power" one holds in these kinds of dynamics—conversations derail much less often and you can learn much more that way. Drama can be handled much easier, and the increase of trust across time is much less chaotic as compared to dealing with a group of friends.
This might be controversial but I've had much better experiences with female loners than male loners: some girls are "anti-social" or simply uninterested in making friendships, but this lack of social interaction doesn't seem to hinder their day-to-day life. I have tried to develop friendships with this "male loner" type in university countless times, and it unfortunately has always failed: they "forget" to respond on WhatsApp, they seem uninterested to hanging out in real life, and they don't talk about their life, ever. I might as well talk to my plant.

Pretty poorly. Trying not to kill myself, I should be able to stay safe. I'm a complete social outcast because I don't know how to not freak people out when I'm just tryna be nice to them. I have a few really good friends, but they're not always there to listen.

I remember my teenage years. Back when I was way too desperate I'd call anyone just to hang out in person, because I sure as hell knew being alone was dangerous. This might be controversial as well, but if you ever need to call anyone, just do it! Preventing your death now ensures that you have a future to care about later.

Yeah, in virtually any hobby space you will have these kind of women, they also can be very hard to ignore because of (depending on the hobby) the novelty factor of having a girl around who is suppossedly interested in the hobby. I used to be weeb and when i went to cons or meet-ups it was always rife with attention whores and Not-like-the-other-girls girls, long before something like social media even existed, social media definitely exacerbated the attention whore issue in pretty much any hobby space. As always, kill secondaries, behead secondaries etc.

My libido does not seem to be high enough to care about either kind, but I do notice a certain uptick of interest in social interaction from others when a girl, or an attractive guy comes along. Notice the distinction between cute guy and any girl. That is one of the many reasons I don't like joining friend groups; one-on-one interactions seem much better.

I'm fucking pissed off. I'm a translator who works mainly with one company, but I've worked with several over the years. One was a company from Spain (for context, I'm not in or from Spain) specializing in game localization. Last year, they stopped paying me, and when pressed, they told me they were going out of business and were trying to find a way to pay. They didn't. They said lawyers were involved and that I'd be notified when something came out of it. Then they stopped answering entirely. They owed me around 12 hundred Euro.

I thought about moving to Spain but, truth be told, I don't see the point if it's getting thoroughly invaded by Nog-Nogs. Still, although there are many European countries to choose from, they are all getting invaded. Oh, my.
And the job market looks like shit, too!

---

I'd like to point out that even talking about the weather is bad OpSec. Not sure that's relevant to many, but for whomever might find it reasonable... Beware.

 

[TotalNematodeDeath]

Birthday is tomorrow and for once I'm excited. Got a nice little plan for friday of going to the theater and then eating some dinner, shit part is I gotta drop my car off at a shop before that. Damn car started squeaking and wobbling whenever I turn and I hope to god it can make it to friday without an issue. Bright side is I get an excuse to cut work an hour early friday at least lol. I wouldn't be worried if I hadn't seen just how unreliable car mechanics have become, every shop near me is filled with awful customer service and massive ass wait times even when they promise it won't be long. Just don't wanna uber to work monday.

 

[Rekeita's Kidneys]

It's hopeless. I don't know how long I can keep "living" this fucked up life.

I'm not enjoying my time on earth and I'm tired of trying constantly just to be surpassed by a toddler.

I fucking hate autism. It's ruined my life.
There is no scenario or situation where I have benefitted from it. Social ability is goddamned tantamount to being able to function at all within society.

You cannot date, work a proper job, have friends, get ahead at all if you have autism. You just can't. I'm a grown ass man who can't hold down a fucking job or do anything to make anyone happy. I'm basically just an automaton that is intelligent everywhere besides where it counts.

Incels are wrong about fucking looks and whatever the fuck, it's social ability that is important. If you can't even look a woman in the eyes it's over for you. I've seen plenty of ugly fucks with women way out of their league and the one dead giveaway is they are NOT spergs.

It's basically forced loneliness and social blindness if I have to describe it in any way. I don't know how the hell I can hold on and cope for another 50 years, let alone this year.

I'm tired boss.

 

[MazonLabs Recruitment Rep]

My fucking neuropathy won't let me sleep, my hands are shaking from...SOMETHING, so I can't paint (which is my usual non-pill related way to get the goddamned goblins to stop stabbing) till it calms down.

 

[Banquet Meal]

it's social ability that is important.

im so sorry you are dealing with this. im sure it is difficult as a young guy having to deal with being the social outcast.
unfortunately, i know all too well about this...if i hadnt married straight out of school, i would be alone...i cant really get along with anyone either. for whatever reason, everyone ends up thinking im weird, or i ramble about pointless/strange topics, and then any potential friends end up avoiding me.
do you have any hobbies or interests that dont require dealing with other people? maybe if you found something you enjoy on your own, it could make it less miserable?? i like video games a lot, and find them distracting. and reading can be fun too, if that is your thing.
in my case, i grew to enjoy my solitude, but it definitely stings when its not an active choice.
people are supposed to be social creatures by default, and being the odd man out sucks for anyone! that said, i bet that you will find someone that is on your level. you are obviously very young, and you have time yet!

I don't know how the hell I can hold on and cope for another 50 years, let alone this year.

idk if im the best advice giver in the world, but im a great listener/story teller, and i am always here if you need or want to talk.

 

[Motherf*cker]

Why does husband have to act like such a fucking faggot?
This morning I was finally finishing my breakfast after doing some chores. And he comes and asks me this in front of my folks.
"Hurr the bathroom smelled ripe this morning..heh heh..did you poop like overnight...heehehh? It is like really stinky...heeehheeh.
"Yea, well my stomach hasn't been too good overnight and yes."
And just when I didn't think he could be idiotic I told him that I was going to have a shower. "Hehh heeh, a shower huh?....have fun. Said like someone who will not touch me like a complete fucking incel. He is lucky I don't fuck around, it's not like there have been opportunities. Before him there were women, and there is this one chick recently,...

We meet when I was nineteen and it seemed like unbelievable happenstance that my husband would find each other because I was so depressed, and I was a shy little girl wanting to take big steps but also not understand consequences (which is fairly normal, girls hormones are intense too.)
I was seemingly a lost cause and I was about to make the commitment to permanently living with my folks because being self dependent was too big of a step and I was fairly irresponsible, self indulgent, lazy and whining.
As nineteen years olds do, I thought that it was something I could handle and I was flattered that an older man saw something in me and that I was mature enough to have a relationship. The other men I saw had seen previously broke it off because they could see my mental illness and although it did hurt at the time, it's not what they were looking for. And they were partially right, I needed to work out my issues and mental illness instead of trying to hitch along with someone else and make it their problem.
He was the beacon of hope I became dependent on and I hitched myself to because he was the lighthouse and I was the beam of light hitching a ride.

I didn't think then that I could do better, or would find anyone.

 

[Squanto Airi]

Why does husband have to act like such a fucking faggot

I may have missed it, but does this man watch or read manosphere/"redpill" content? Cause his actions match the actions of one typical of the average fan of that stuff.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

I hear about the usual mix of no-call no-shows and complaints about new people taking a while to learn the ropes while the coworkers who have 10+ years in the company being absolutely terrible and somehow still sticking around. I couldn't imagine how shitty getting into the trades can be now if basic bitch customer service or, god forbid, retail is being fucking gatekept from the average Joe or Jane.

I've worked this position for 6 months by February with no mentorship and a superior who has no clue how my tasks are done. I'm starting to gel into my tasks and be able to to take on previously unexplored tasks. Yet, oh boy, orientation every Wednesday is basically just a 15 min session of being peppered with everything I've done wrong - because I do things, and thus can do wrong. No clue what the temp actually does all day but clearly the whole "we're both old mothers" vibe keeps her in good graces.

My mom works in a kindergarten and every single time they have a young male intern, the tension is massively deflated. All-women spaces are hell, especially when they're all old, sour about their lacking lives and threatened by the new eye candy blonde they've hired straight out of marketing at university. To think how much better this job would be if we just had another man around. I worked 40 days in the previous office and two women independently told me I'm being spoken to and treated unfairly. Practically strangers to me, and even they can see it.

if i hadnt married straight out of school, i would be alone...i cant really get along with anyone either. for whatever reason, everyone ends up thinking im weird, or i ramble about pointless/strange topics, and then any potential friends end up avoiding me.

It's nuts. Study shows, obviously, partnered people do better in all aspects of life. I'd meet up at work tomorrow with a smug-ass attitude, knowing I wouldn't get fired, if I had a hoe at home on my side. Get fired? Doesn't matter, I got my hoe and I'll have the confidence to go land a new job. It's like interviewing for a job when you've already got one versus being unemployed. And that's ignoring never having to deal with dating apps, ghosting, modern social media or anything. People who find love in their youth are cheating the system.

If you can't even look a woman in the eyes it's over for you. I've seen plenty of ugly fucks with women way out of their league and the one dead giveaway is they are NOT spergs.

A coworker sorta ironically tried setting me up with her walking red flag bestie. Even just the thought that some people find love that way is fucking nuts to me. Holy shit what an easy life it must be just being handfed by your friends, both jobs, partners and social opportunities. I think anyone without the tism in a similar situation are just as fucked. I sure am.

 

[Mechanical Pencil]

I'm very mildly peeved. I just wanted to eat my lunch outside while it's decent out but I tripped on the doormat at the entrance of my garage and now the last of my skyr, cashews, and blueberries are smeared and scattered on my driveway.

 

[Motherf*cker]

I may have missed it, but does this man watch or read manosphere/"redpill" content? Cause his actions match the actions of one typical of the average fan of that stuff.

That was my fault, when I met him he was living as a woman, but I have made him very based. Two years ago we had a trip together and he had an epiphany that a lot of his mental illness had to do with gender dysphoria and the community was filled with self-fixated mental midgets who had untreated mental illness and are probably insane. Here's the kicker, he told me and immediately I told him that I supported him. He was having trouble readjusting to living as a man and I told him that it was OK, he used to talk to me all the time. The emotional abuse was there but it was a vibration.
Now he is a misogynist and he talks about men's issues (which I support) but there is always this misogynistic fuck women undertone to what he says.
Fucking pendulum swung too far and he's a based knobhead.

 

[long waters]

I don't know how the hell I can hold on and cope for another 50 years, let alone this year.

Life is lifegem, so you will cope and sneed for many more years!

This morning I was finally finishing my breakfast after doing some chores. And he comes and asks me this in front of my folks.
"Hurr the bathroom smelled ripe this morning..heh heh..did you poop like overnight...heehehh? It is like really stinky...heeehheeh.

Fuck, your husband sounds annoyingly retarded.

That was my fault, when I met him he was living as a woman, but I have made him very based. [...]

Wait what, your husband was becoming a troon when you first met him?!


Updates: Today I went to therapy for the first time ever. It was interesting, it feels good to vent/talk about some bullshit I've been overthinking my whole life... Talked about maybe getting tested for 'tism in the future too. Well, it's gonna be a long journey, hopefully at the end I'll have come to terms with myself more and be less selfloathing.

 

[Otterly]

when I met him he was living as a woman,

you cannot get out of there fast enough.

 

[Motherf*cker]

Life is lifegem, so you will cope and sneed for many more years!


Fuck, your husband sounds annoyingly retarded.


Wait what, your husband was becoming a troon when you first met him?!


Updates: Today I went to therapy for the first time ever. It was interesting, it feels good to vent/talk about some bullshit I've been overthinking my whole life... Talked about maybe getting tested for 'tism in the future too. Well, it's gonna be a long journey, hopefully at the end I'll have come to terms with myself more and be less selfloathing.

you cannot get out of there fast enough.

Twenty years ago he was a Troon, yes

 

[Quijibo69]

I'm going to have a serious conversation with someone this weekend. I'm going to call them today and see when they want to have it. Let's see how it goes.

 

[long waters]

Twenty years ago he was a Troon, yes

Well, I guess you kind of fixed him, kind of. Sounds like he still needs a lot of fixing though sorry to say.

 

[Squanto Airi]

That was my fault, when I met him he was living as a woman

if he trooned out, there was already that undertone of misogyny, whether it boiled to the surface or not. It is rather funny how he fails to do anything but a crass imitation of both masculinity and femininity.

As my tax, finally have a set in stone plan to knock down my debt. Not drowning in it, but it's been a thorn in my side. Also just scheduled my apartment blessing. So things are starting to look up.

 

[Banquet Meal]

I'm very mildly peeved. I just wanted to eat my lunch outside while it's decent out but I tripped on the doormat at the entrance of my garage and now the last of my skyr, cashews, and blueberries are smeared and scattered on my driveway.

i hope you are ok!