How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[Otterly]

Perimenopause has been hitting me hard recently, and I can't stop crying, my moods have been fluctuating like crazy, night sweats and insomnia.
I woke up at 4 am again last night drenched in sweat and my brain was like: this is normal, enjoy.
Doom.

Can you get HRT? They’ve changed the guidance recently in the light of better data that seems to show that there’s only a very tiny risk of clots with the transdermal oestrogen (way less than being overweight for example)

 

[Betonhaus]

I think I got over the cold, I went to sleep covered in several layers of blankets and basically sweated out the cold, then had a hot shower as close to boiling hot as I could handle

 

[Spunt]

I got the flu and coughed so hard I cracked a rib. Flu is gone but now there's almost no possible sleeping position that doesn't hurt.

 

[The Feline Solution 2]

I know I'm seen as a germaphobe but I'm terrified of getting sick enough that it leads to a secondary infection- the last time I took antibiotics I was hospitalized and they know this. Took me half a year to recover (like being able to leave my house). My guts are finally in a place where I can function like a normal human.

Totally get that, got a nasty case of the flu that floored me for three fucking months a couple of years ago (definitely pre-COVID times), never again. In the colder seasons the first thing i ask friends or family i visit is "Are the kids sick?", they way too often carry some nasty stuff from Kindergarten or school. Kind of an uncool move from your family but i do understand that they wanted you around for the holidays and didn't want to risk you not showing up.

 

[long waters]

On Christmas day it snowed for the first time this winter, and today it was sunny. It was very nice.

 

[56 others]

I've been running so hard during the busy season that I've just been sleeping in. FEELS GOOD

 

[Plastic Paddy]

I know this is kind of stupid of me being sad about since it's way out of my control, but my friend and I were supposed to take out one of our friends out to dinner since she lost her dad. We wanted to take her out because she's going through a shitty time. Now she got into a car accident, and the one social outing I have with my friends before the year is up went poof. I feel really terrible for her.

Life really comes at you fast. Thank God this shitty time of year and year is over.

I managed to go out with my friends on Christmas Eve and it was wonderful. Go meet people who you care about and who care about you whenever it can work. It helps a lot.

 

[Bothriolepis]

You might also have one through the educational system or legal system.

I'm pretty sure it's voc rehab that my wife has one through, but they also help her out with Medicaid, scheduling doctors' appointments, etc. She's got a touch of the 'Tism - nothing dramatic enough to keep her from working or leading a relatively normal life, but having help with coordinating her treatment and benefits has been a godsend for both of us. It's something I'd recommend for anyone in a similar situation, because government aid and the mental health system are both complicated and difficult to navigate even if you're not struggling or in crisis. There's no shame in admitting that you need help in dealing with a system patched together by grossly unqualified politicians and bureaucrats, most of them more interested in petty white-collar Machiavellianism or in the next election cycle than in the well-being of their constituents. The world isn't actually divided between normal people and lolcows. We're pretty much all varying degrees of fucked up. What really matters is whether someone's willing to accept their brokenness, to try to fix what they can, and to work around what they can't.

I'll admit that I'm much better at giving advice than I am at taking it when it comes to this, though. My wife has tried to convince me for years, since a time when we were just close friends, to be more open toward accepting help. It's always been difficult for me to acknowledge that I was in over my head, though, even when my life's been the equivalent of a hurricane at landfall and I've barely been treading water in the storm surge. As much as it might annoy the fuck out of me in the moment, her stubborn pestering has probably made my life better than it ever has been, just by having someone there to tell me when I need to cut the bullshit and acknowledge that things aren't alright. I love her like she loves miniature model houses with tiny furniture, and dear God does she love miniature model houses with tiny furniture.

 

[TexasRanger]

Right now?

Trouble at work and I don't really know how to cope....2025 Has been pretty shitty for me. Problem is- I'm ruminating all the time.....so, not too great at the moment, I'll go see a professional about it (work related issues)

 

[The Repeated Meme]

I'm in so much pain right now. I'm so sad I'm fucking bawling. Please send me something funny or cute in dms to help cheer me up.

 

[Ryo Ma]

Right now?

Trouble at work and I don't really know how to cope....2025 Has been pretty shitty for me. Problem is- I'm ruminating all the time.....so, not too great at the moment, I'll go see a professional about it (work related issues)

Hey friend, take my advice, do not stew on these things. Letting issues eat at you and trying to tough them out, especially with work, will ruin your mental health. Rumination can be addressed, don't try to just deal by yourself. It feels like the manly thing to do, it is not.

 

[WASR96]

Had to spend Christmas day inpatient, but it sounds like they're going to send me home today since hospice will be able to upkeep my med regiment. Like I feared, disease is in my spine now and surgery would make it worse, so 10x more rounds of radiation to try to get it instead. I hate how I wasn't able to keep it together for Christmas itself.

 

[Unnecessary Surgery Land]

Totally get that, got a nasty case of the flu that floored me for three fucking months a couple of years ago (definitely pre-COVID times), never again. In the colder seasons the first thing i ask friends or family i visit is "Are the kids sick?", they way too often carry some nasty stuff from Kindergarten or school. Kind of an uncool move from your family but i do understand that they wanted you around for the holidays and didn't want to risk you not showing up.

You’re right— fortunately I haven’t been bitching to them too much for getting me sick but that’s probably because they’ve been buying me pho every day I’ve been here to make up for it

kids are little precious plague rats.

This Christmas was the best we had in a while and I even networked with someone in my industry and may have landed a cool new freelance job that might pay a lot. Paperwork needs to be drafted and looked over but we’ll see.

I’m feeling blah today but that’s probably because I have to drive a big bulk of 1000 miles sick tomorrow lmao

 

[The Feline Solution 2]

Had to spend Christmas day inpatient, but it sounds like they're going to send me home today since hospice will be able to upkeep my med regiment. Like I feared, disease is in my spine now and surgery would make it worse, so 10x more rounds of radiation to try to get it instead. I hate how I wasn't able to keep it together for Christmas itself.

Ah shit man, i was hoping you'd make it so that you could have some nice and not too difficult holidays, you got someone from your fam that will be there for you today?

 

[TotalNematodeDeath]

I have begun to think that I sit some place amongst type A disorders, not to say I haven't thought about it before of course. I had to rule certain things out (like autism) and I don't think I'm far enough gone to really have one disorder over another yet. I tried very hard to take control back over my life and it did work for the most part, just I still have these strange bits of myself that I've learned are just me. I experience visual hallucinations of begin sorts a few times a week which at this point are mostly just things moving that aren't there when I check again. I also tend to see things grow in scale or zoom incredibly far out which isn't bad but it has happened when I'm driving which does bother me. I used to have much worse shadows and whispers that have thankfully gone away as I've bettered my mental health, a few years back I could of sworn things lived in shadows and were closing in. The part that really convinced me that I may be a bit of the deep end was after a lifetime of vivid nightmares, near 100% lucid dreams, and sleep paralysis I said enough was enough and called out to the thing in my dreams and a black shadow appeared. I remember banishing it from my dreams and since then I've had nearly no nightmares and my day to day anxiety nearly completely disappeared. The thing that makes me think I'm a bit nuts is that I just cannot deny that the shadow was real. I just cannot, no matter how much the intelligent side of me argues that it can be explained in a perfectly scientific way I'm convinced I was the host for something trying to break me.

It doesn't really bother me as my day to day life is perfectly fine but I do get a fair bit lonely, I feel like a different person to most people I've met and I just wanna talk to people who can sympathize some I suppose.

 

[Canoodler]

Things have just been getting worse lately. Nothing but bad news it seems.

 

[obsdj]

Had to spend Christmas day inpatient, but it sounds like they're going to send me home today since hospice will be able to upkeep my med regiment. Like I feared, disease is in my spine now and surgery would make it worse, so 10x more rounds of radiation to try to get it instead. I hate how I wasn't able to keep it together for Christmas itself.

I'm so sorry, I'm sure that was disappointing for you and for your loved ones. I hope you're letting yourself feel whatever you're feeling. I know I've said it before but you have no obligation to be that guy, "the saint who never complained" etc. Hopefully hospice will be able to keep you comfortable. Still praying.

 

[ForgedBlades]

I've had a sore throat and have been hacking up phlegm for the last four or five days. Just generally felt like shit. I went to prompt care today and got a strep test that came back negative so it's probably something viral. Afterwards I went next door and had a sandwich at Jersey Mike's which was the first real food aside from crackers I've had in a while because my throat had been so torn up.

I was feeling relatively good so I made the genius decision to go to my storage unit because there is some stuff in there I've been wanting to put up on eBay. It's a fucking mess in there and the stuff I was looking for is in the back, so I had to move about 15 heavy boxes to get to what I was looking for. By the time I made it, I was pouring sweat, gasping for air, and realizing it was probably wasn't a good idea to do this shit while I was sick.

Then I got that feeling. You know the one. And I knew there was no way in hell I was going to make it outside. So I bent over and just started hurling all over my shoes and onto the floor. Chunks of half digested roast beef sandwich, Mountain Dew, and Cheddar Ruffles just fucking everywhere. It was a biblical amount of vomit. I took a photo of the puddle for posterity's sake but I'm not going to post it because it's seriously NSFL.

So I'm standing there wondering what the fuck I'm going to do. I thought about calling my dad and having him drive 20 minutes to help me clean it up, but decided instead to strip off the shitty hoodie I was wearing and try to mop it up. I went outside first and did the best I could to clean off my shoes in the snowbank in the parking lot. It didn't really work.

I tried cleaning it up with the hoodie with mixed results. I got most of the chunks (I think) but there was a lot of liquid left behind. At this point I was just like fuck it, and threw the hoodie in the floorboard of my backseat because they don't have a dumpster on site. I'm going to have to go back there with a mop and bucket and clean it up for real once I'm feeling better. In hindsight I probably should have just called my dad. Hopefully it doesn't attract any mice or shit. Do mice eat human vomit?

So then I realize I have to move all of the boxes I took out back into the unit. I sat on the ground for about five minutes with my head in my hands just dripping sweat until I decided that this shit wasn't going to get any easier, and somehow I got up and did it. My body was like "I'm pretty sure I told you 20 minutes ago not to do this shit", so when I got back outside I was bent over dry heaving for a couple minutes.

The entire building smelled like that oil and vinegar shit they put on all their sandwiches there. So did my car because I had to drive home with the fucking hoodie in the backseat. The kicker? I didn't even find half of what I was looking for because I needed to go through boxes and after the incident I decided to cut my losses and leave with only a couple of the things I came for.

Anyway, I'm back home in bed right now and feel fine aside from a mild sore throat. I know this isn't shit compared to what some of you bros are going through, but it's a pretty good chapter to add to the book of comedy that is my life.

 

[Pedophobe]

I don't post here much but it's now 10.8 years later and I feel like I've turned a corner. A few months ago I was going through the usual rumination rigmarole and the thought just popped into my head "I don't have to feel this way" like I'd just realized for the first time the alternatives can be legitimate. It was like a real epiphany, a spontaneous emotional revelation without any rationalization. I don't know how much of it was a bolt from the blue vs the ultimate result of years of hard work but it doesn't really matter either way. It's nice.

I'm not "cured" and I still get pretty stressed out by certain situations or anticipating those situations but so far I'm finding it a lot easier to relax my mind and get stuff I want to do done. I've gone from "everything is too hard and I can't deal" to "many things are difficult but I should be able to manage".

 

[WASR96]

Ah shit man, i was hoping you'd make it so that you could have some nice and not too difficult holidays, you got someone from your fam that will be there for you today?

Yeah. I feel bad but I had to have my Dad drive me there yesterday and my Mom picked me up today. I can't feel my feet and need help getting around at the moment which sucks. My brother is staying at my house with me during the holidays, so he's able to help me with getting stuff at the moment.

I'm so sorry, I'm sure that was disappointing for you and for your loved ones. I hope you're letting yourself feel whatever you're feeling. I know I've said it before but you have no obligation to be that guy, "the saint who never complained" etc. Hopefully hospice will be able to keep you comfortable. Still praying.

Yeah I'm definitely becoming more irritated at how I can't just get a week off from this shit.