/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

[UsedUp]

After a young man gets separated from his friends while in the woods, he falls into a 10-foot deep pit of spikes, impaling him through the leg, and leaving him trapped. He quickly learns that his fall was not an accident.

In Theatres May 29th

Pitfall is a survival horror film starring Richard Harmon, Alexandra Essoe, and Randy Couture.

 

[Exterminatus]

Teaser for the resident evil movie is out, I fear this corroborates the leaked script from a little while ago

https://youtu.be/SJPu1spHqfk?si=ka5WIYOjy7NPCHX8

Don't have high hopes for this one, but I also wasn't super into Barbarian or Weapons. I think what they should've done, if they wanted to avoid using the main characters from the games, was just use Resident Evil: Outbreak as the basis for the story. You have Raccoon City and zombies, and you can use some T-Virus mutations.

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=XgcqAaxTyHo
After a young man gets separated from his friends while in the woods, he falls into a 10-foot deep pit of spikes, impaling him through the leg, and leaving him trapped. He quickly learns that his fall was not an accident.

In Theatres May 29th

Pitfall is a survival horror film starring Richard Harmon, Alexandra Essoe, and Randy Couture.

fudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudBEEE MuhRREEEEEAAAAAHHHHMURREEEEAAAAAAA

 

[MoffAlbert]

fudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudfudBEEE MuhRREEEEEAAAAAHHHHMURREEEEAAAAAAA

Glad I'm not the only one who thought the same thing when I read the title

 

[Calandrino]

Pitfall is a survival horror film starring Richard Harmon, Alexandra Essoe, and Randy Couture.

If anything this is less game-accurate than Resident Evil

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

If anything this is less game-accurate than Resident Evil

now I sorta want a gag trailer of PITFALL! where he falls down and the scorpion advances on him

 

[Your Starter for 10]

If they don't have a part where they get across a lake by stepping on crocodile heads I'm rioting.

 

[Calandrino]

Mole People teaches us that slavery is wrong, even if you're enslaving subhuman monsters that eat human flesh. That's the 1950s version of woke. Also, the internet's telling me that executives changed the plot to avoid concerns about miscegenation (underground dwellers officially aren't white).

Modern filmmakers could learn a lot from this movie: just because a movie is a clumsy anti-racism allegory, that's no reason for it to not be extremely racist. You can do both.

 

[The Nothingness]

Hokum is like a better Stephen King story (aka his short stories). I liked that it did not turn out to be the trope of the outsider is the target of the shady locals. Adam Scott did a fine job and had a good character arc. Parts of the third act dragged and I thought some scenes could have cut or changed to get to the payoff that was set up in the first act. Before I get into spoilers, my final score is a 7/10 ringing bells.

Spoiler

The crux of the story is Scott's character forgiving himself for accidently killing his mom with his dad's gun when he was a child. The first half does a good part of hinting at who shot his mom without telling and you'll probably piece it together by the time the first act ends. The problem is after knowing what happened, you have to sit through flashbacks and spooky hallucinations that tell you what you already know.

There were a number of scenes that would have more effective without the jumpscare sound effect. That being said the were also scenes where having the sound effect would be appropriate, such as a certain uncanny figure used in the trailers or when the witch is seen climbing the walls of the elevator that connects the honeymoon suite to the basement.

 

[Dragged Into Sunlight]

I'm a lifelong Floridian and I've done Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios in the summer and it was miserable unless you had a fast pass. Thanks for the confirmation that Epic is degrees of magnitude worse.

Spring Break is the best time for Universal and Islands of Adventure. The weather is nice and the crowds aren't too crazy.

 

[Wot Zit Too Yah0996]

Alexandra Essoe

She seems to be in a fair few decent horror films. Might be tempted to give it a go.

Spring Break

Ha, ha, ha, ha, fuck's sake... You made me think of this hick:

 

[Battlefield2142EU]

Within the first six minutes of the video, a tranny British individual with a notably deep voice begins expressing criticisms regarding John Wayne's alleged racism, misogyny, and support for genocide. Mind you he is praising Rob Zombie's writing. The same guy who added a graphic rape scene to the first Halloween remake to increase nudity. Breadtubers don’t even like Rob Zombie yet literal trannies can’t get enough of him. Anyone else noticed this?

 

[Alaska20k]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=9k567_qzP-ohttps://youtube.com/watch?v=CwM11-ozQdYWithin the first six minutes of the video, a tranny British individual with a notably deep voice begins expressing criticisms regarding John Wayne's alleged racism, misogyny, and support for genocide. Mind you he is praising Rob Zombie's writing. The same guy who added a graphic rape scene to the first Halloween remake to increase nudity. Breadtubers don’t even like Rob Zombie yet literal trannies can’t get enough of him. Anyone else noticed this?

No, I typically go out of my way not to hear trannys speak

 

[Aib Ld]

Evil Dead Burn full trailer is out.
The mirror bit is pretty cool.

 

[Battlefield2142EU]

I know people joke about A24 horror a new genre. But what the hell is this? A new funny face horror genre?

 

[Absurdist Laughter]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=XgcqAaxTyHo
After a young man gets separated from his friends while in the woods, he falls into a 10-foot deep pit of spikes, impaling him through the leg, and leaving him trapped. He quickly learns that his fall was not an accident.

In Theatres May 29th

Pitfall is a survival horror film starring Richard Harmon, Alexandra Essoe, and Randy Couture.

Ewe, it's coming out in May. It's gonna be a steaming pile of garbage.

 

[Big Miss Steak]

Spring Break is the best time for Universal and Islands of Adventure. The weather is nice and the crowds aren't too crazy.

This is shocking to hear, as they report spring break as one of their peak times of the year. Is there a certain week that you go?

Saw Hokum and really liked it. There were a few twists that I saw coming, but overall I enjoyed it and I think Adam Scott did a good job. I'll keep my eye on Damian McCarthy.

Why are so many horror protagonists writers? Is this a nod to Stephen King?

I know people joke about A24 horror a new genre. But what the hell is this? A new funny face horror genre?

Haven't seen Oddity but the director has said the rabbit is a deliberately repeating motif in his stuff, idk why. There's a lot of rabbit imagery in Hokum.

Spoiler: Barbarian

I very much disagree.

He wasn't ultimately a bad guy, but the movie paints him as a bad guy the entire time he's on screen.

Because he's fucking Pennywise. That's the joke. This was fresh off his roles in Castle Rock and IT Chapter 2. The trailers even portrayed him as the main villain IIRC. This was all to set up an early twist where he's actually some poor sap bystander who gets pounded into grape jelly. That's it. That's the joke. If you took this very funny flip-flop of "Pennywise the clown is actually not the bad guy he's just some minor character who is the first onscreen kill" as some attack against mankind as a whole, I feel bad for you.

Just because it's painted as a joke doesn't change the obvious messaging. The guy acts like Chris Hemsworth in Ghostbusters 2016. It was played for laughs there too, and everyone said it was sexist and hated it.

Does it suddenly become not sexist because it's Justin Long?

Didn't see Ghostbusters 2016 so can't comment on it. No, the portrayal of a male sex predator is not automatically sexist. Sex predators are overwhelmingly male. Do you think it's racist to portray a gang member as black or Mexican? Do you think it's sexist to portray a "trophy spouse" as female? Sometimes a character can be a bad person and also a man and it's okay. The fact that he's also sort of comic relief takes away some of the ickiness and reprehensible nature so yeah, the fact that it's played as a joke does actually make it even less likely that there's some sort of hidden message here. The hidden message being that most sex predators are men, which everyone and their mother knows.

The actor is Richard Barke. I don't agree with the notion of him being the true villain.

Why not? He's an incestuous rapist and if it weren't for him, there wouldn't be a monster lady living under the house killing people. It's his deliberately malicious actions that led to the characters all being in that situation. I'd say he's definitely not the main antagonist, but he's the villain of the movie 100%.

The movie is a metaphor for diddling

The movie is absolutely not a metaphor for child molestation and I don't know how you could arrive at that conclusion.

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

Spoiler: Barbarian

If you took this very funny flip-flop of "Pennywise the clown

I think you've lost the plot here. There is nothing in the movie that indicates this meta commentary.

I could completely buy Cregger actually saying this in an interview because he's an idiot. However, I think you put wayyyyyy more thought into this than he ever did.

The fact that he's also sort of comic relief takes away some of the ickiness and reprehensible nature so yeah,

You do know this justifies my point of this being a woke feminist movie even more, right?

I'd say he's definitely not the main antagonist, but he's the villain of the movie 100%.

Oh definitely, my point was just the actual main antagonist was all 3 male characters in aggregate.

The movie is absolutely not a metaphor for child molestation and I don't know how you could arrive at that conclusion

By diddling, I meant rape. I just didn't feel like typing rape out at the time when I made the post, sorry for the confusion.

My ultimate point is that Barbarian is a woke feminist movie and it just has a very fancy coat of paint.

I also can't wrap my head around movie viewers who hate this woke stuff in every other movie, but for some reason give Barbarian a pass. People who hate wokeness in movies, happily get on their knees to suck Zach Cregger's dick and I really don't understand why.

I don't think it's a good movie. I don't think it has a well thought out plot. I don't like it's message. Heck, I didn't even find it funny.

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

Spring Break is the best time for Universal and Islands of Adventure. The weather is nice and the crowds aren't too crazy.

This is shocking to hear, as they report spring break as one of their peak times of the year. Is there a certain week that you go?

seriously is there something that says this is specific to Uni?
I'm not going back into those places (outside of the waterpark) unless it's winter

 

[Big Miss Steak]

My ultimate point is that Barbarian is a woke feminist movie and it just has a very fancy coat of paint.

It's not and you can't provide a convincing reason why it is.

I also can't wrap my head around movie viewers who hate this woke stuff in every other movie, but for some reason give Barbarian a pass

Because it's not woke. I don't mean this to sound patronizing, although it probably will, but if you stop going into stories with the assumption that every bad/scummy/reprehensible male character is a commentary on mankind as a whole, you will enjoy things a lot more.

seriously is there something that says this is specific to Uni?
I'm not going back into those places (outside of the waterpark) unless it's winter

I find this guide useful for parks. Not gospel, but a helpful guide. https://magicguides.com/universal-orlando-crowd-calendar/

Finally returned to RE9 and finished it.

Spoiler: RE9

I admire what they were attempting to do by merging the first person horror of RE7 with the third person over the shoulder action perspective, and I like Grace and Leon. I also like the new stuff with Umbrella, the Connections, the BSAA, and the US government. But on a gameplay level it just doesn't work for me. Leon plays more like RE2 Remake than RE4 Remake and it doesn't fit well with the combat situations he's put into. Grace's gameplay isn't my cup of tea personally but it's very well-done and it FLOORS me that this was originally conceived of as a Leon-only game and Grace was added later in development. Feels like the opposite is true. The pacing is also all over the place, with the first part of the game being 85% Grace in a dark and atmospheric institution and then doing a complete flip in the second half, where we play as Leon in broad daylight in a boring grey burned out Raccoon City, which clashes with the horror tone they had established. I also had a few hard crashes to desktop in the first half of the game and several framerate plummets in the second half with Leon. The motorcycle segment took me several attempts as I tinkered with settings to keep the framerate above 20 FPS.

It's not awful but ehhh I won't be returning to it, and the glazing it's receiving is unreal. Likely due to the very impressive performances and visuals, which is all anyone cares about now it feels like.