/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

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Kofi Drinka said:
Midsommer's ending is like watching Trump win an election. Screaming women ends up becoming funny because it's so poorly done.
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It was trying to be Whicker man but forgot less is more. If it didn't have the music at the end I think it would have helped a bit.

Kofi Drinka said:
Is it good acting if the movie bores you? Movies are entertainment and if your movie is boring then it's a bad movie. Midsommer's ending is like watching Trump win an election. Screaming women ends up becoming funny because it's so poorly done.
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Yeah boring is bad, a movie can have the best FX, the best actors, and the most moving story but if I find it boring I hate it. I'll happily watch Winterbeast, Frostbiter: Wrath of the Wendigo, or Lair of the White Worm because I'm entertained by them.
 
Kofi Drinka said:
It's biggest problem is modern Hollywood casting makes most the cast ugly and there's obvious pandering to wokeness.
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I found it funny that the grandma is white, yet she has full Filipino and Hispanic kids that don't even remotely look mixed. Did they ever go into that or just gloss over it?
 
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The handsome tard said:
A shame, the trailer is legit amazing but marketing can only trick you so much from reality.
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The trailer is amazing because the movie has these weird jump cuts to the zombies at night or to knights and archers, etc. so it was remarkably easy to cut a decent trailer. In practice, it's messy and the metaphors are so heavy handed it's absolutely laughable. They also all but vanish by the second half of the movie.

What I said before was confirmed. There were several versions of the script and they kind of copy and pasted stuff together last minute. I largely believe the first 30ish minutes exists from the original cut of the movie and that's why it's actually entertaining. The second half is what makes me want to rip my hair out with how mind numbingly stupid and baffling it is. It explains why certain characters and concepts are introduced and just casually tossed out of the window one second later. The father was clearly meant to be the star of the movie until Garland and Boyle got control of the script.

I'll make this comparison because I just saw it, but Jurassic World Rebirth has dozens of stupid, idiotic moments. However, the difference is that movie plays it off for laughs and you aren't supposed to take those moments seriously. Do they still harm the movie? Yes. But do they make the movie an absolutely frustrating experience? No. They largely exist in a vacuum. You just eye roll and move on. Whereas scenes in 28 Years Later that is played less for laughs and it's hand is mostly dealt straight, is absolutely ruined by these stupid moments. The scene with the pregnant zombie is so mind numbingly stupid and frustrating that by the end of it, you can't walk away in good faith anymore.
 
Party Hat Wurmple said:
The trailer is amazing because the movie has these weird jump cuts to the zombies at night or to knights and archers, etc. so it was remarkably easy to cut a decent trailer. In practice, it's messy and the metaphors are so heavy handed it's absolutely laughable. They also all but vanish by the second half of the movie.
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I also think that the fact this is a sequel to the 28 days series did help since everyone remembers how good the OG was and how "great at beginning, ok ish at the rest with a great ending" the sequel was that everyone wanted to see the original fast zombies again running around Europe, especially with the implication they were a stronger strain of the virus.

I'd really much prefer that they just declared Weeks non canon and say this is an alternative continuity where Britain was left behind instead of other nations getting involved in a clean up, and even it would still contradict the ending of the original that just had the infected dying off of hunger (when they should be dropping even earlier due to dehydration but I digress). The concept of the virus evolving came from Weeks and thats the only thing Years is "carrying over" from it.

Oh well, as many said, its the closest we will ever get to a Crossed 100 movie adaptation so it might be preferable to use your imagination and believe its that.

...You know, now that I mentioned it, its kind of crazy how they still are going with a Crossed movie, apparently a director got attached and there is absolutely no way that the violence and nudity wont be toned down extremely so. Maybe HBO during the GOT years might have been able to keep the contents "close enough" to the source material but then again, Crossed is mostly shock value for the sake of it while pretending it has a social commentary behind it (which is basically most of Garth's work but I digress) so plot is even there to tell? Nearly all protagonists meet horrible ends and the few that dont are deranged unlikable maniacs that will in no way keep any sort of audience engagement.

I personally built an immunity over Crossed's fuck-upness and thats kind of the worst thing that could have happened because it then dawns on you that the plots dont really have much going on for them.

I think "The Sadness" is the closest to a Crossed movie we are ever going to get
 
The Lawgiver said:
Speaking of lovecraft it's always bothered me how people just like depict everything he did as like tentacle monsters. There's a guy in one of his stories that's like based on a dude he had a dream about once named Nyatharlhotep, and he's described as basically looking like a tall dark skinned egyptian. Look him up on image search and NONE of the depictions of him actually look like he's described. He's not the only victim of this, It's just all fucking tentacle monsters all the way down. If horror people could do it they'd depict niggerman as a tentacle blob of unknown shape instead of a funny cat.
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You'll never see a proper portrayal of Nyarlathotep, not just because he's a vaguely swarthoid guy, but because his methods of controlling and destroy civilisation is to literally just make it our own civilisation. He distracts them with science and warps the morality of people, he disconnects them from their history and their past and it destroys them. He's not just 'oooh scary monster' he's an embodied force of entropy almost.
 
Party Hat Wurmple said:
I'll make this comparison because I just saw it, but Jurassic World Rebirth has dozens of stupid, idiotic moments. However, the difference is that movie plays it off for laughs and you aren't supposed to take those moments seriously. Do they still harm the movie? Yes. But do they make the movie an absolutely frustrating experience? No. They largely exist in a vacuum. You just eye roll and move on. Whereas scenes in 28 Years Later that is played less for laughs and it's hand is mostly dealt straight, is absolutely ruined by these stupid moments. The scene with the pregnant zombie is so mind numbingly stupid and frustrating that by the end of it, you can't walk away in good faith anymore.
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Do you have free tickets or were you forced? The Jurassic franchise has 3 good movies total and they keep making them worse.
 
Chunky Salsa said:
You'll never see a proper portrayal of Nyarlathotep, not just because he's a vaguely swarthoid guy, but because his methods of controlling and destroy civilisation is to literally just make it our own civilisation. He distracts them with science and warps the morality of people, he disconnects them from their history and their past and it destroys them. He's not just 'oooh scary monster' he's an embodied force of entropy almost.
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I've seen the rare occasional accurate to description art of him, but that's an interesting take for sure.
 
The Lawgiver said:
I've seen the rare occasional accurate to description art of him, but that's an interesting take for sure.
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It was always this part that stuck with me:

And it was then that Nyarlathotep came out of Egypt. Who he was, none could tell, but he was of the old native blood and looked like a Pharaoh. The fellahin knelt when they saw him, yet could not say why. He said he had risen up out of the blackness of twenty-seven centuries, and that he had heard messages from places not on this planet. Into the lands of civilisation came Nyarlathotep, swarthy, slender, and sinister, always buying strange instruments of glass and metal and combining them into instruments yet stranger. He spoke much of the sciences—of electricity and psychology—and gave exhibitions of power which sent his spectators away speechless, yet which swelled his fame to exceeding magnitude. Men advised one another to see Nyarlathotep, and shuddered. And where Nyarlathotep went, rest vanished; for the small hours were rent with the screams of nightmare. Never before had the screams of nightmare been such a public problem; now the wise men almost wished they could forbid sleep in the small hours, that the shrieks of cities might less horribly disturb the pale, pitying moon as it glimmered on green waters gliding under bridges, and old steeples crumbling against a sickly sky.
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A new age has come, and with it comes Nyarlathotep. Not just a monster, but a thing that shows us news ways of viewing the world which ultimately drive us to horror. Lovecraft wasn't just 'ahhhh I'm going insane help me niggerman!!"
 
Chunky Salsa said:
Lovecraft wasn't just 'ahhhh I'm going insane help me niggerman!!"
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Anyone that actually read the stuff without going in after a video essayist said hew was could tell that. I was more talking about the thing you kinda said with people drawing the guy as "AAA SCARY SLENDERMAN TENTACLE MONSTER AAAAA SCARY TENTACLE MONSTER WITH 5 ARMS AAAAAA" being some form of extension of his shit.
 
The Lawgiver said:
3 had the dinosaur saying alan. Did world have that? I don't think it did.
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World had a fucking dino whisperer. No, I want the true Jurassic Park 4 with dinomen.
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I want a movie where Triceratops man is smoking a big cigar talking about war never changing. The new world movies never go full fun stupid and I hate them for it.
 
im kinda late to this but me and my friends tried to watch all friday the 13th movies lasst friday the 13th, we only managed to watch 5 before falling asleep, really fun tho
 
I watched The Poughkeepsie Tapes and it was an enjoyable flick (as fucked up as it is) since I really liked the documentary style for it. I want to now rewatch Noroi and see if there are other horror mockumentary movies that scratch this itch.
 
Doctor of Autism said:
I watched The Poughkeepsie Tapes and it was an enjoyable flick (as fucked up as it is) since I really liked the documentary style for it. I want to now rewatch Noroi and see if there are other horror mockumentary movies that scratch this itch.
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Psychic Vision Jiangrei or whatever was a nice little romp
 
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