/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

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The Shrouds is like if David Cronenberg wrote and directed Eyes Wide Shut. It, uh, does feel long. It's one of those ones where he didn't even try to make a movie that general audiences would like. It's mostly one-on-one conversations with dialog that sounds like Cronenberg thinking out loud.
Feels long in a good way or a bad way?
Like Mamoru Oshii can make two hours feel like three, but in a good way
 
Feels long in a good way or a bad way?
Like Mamoru Oshii can make two hours feel like three, but in a good way
It was starting to lose me a bit halfway though. It's only 2 hours to EWS's 2.5, fwiw. Thought it was worth watching but "nothing happens" is bound to be a common complaint.
 
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Jordan Peele fired his managers after his production company lost the bidding war for Weapons, I think this movie is going to be something special
 
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Have you recovered from the horrific shaky cam yet?
The shaky cam was barely in the top 10 things horrifyingly wrong with that movie. CGI video-toaster insert squibs, "riddled with bullets dancing death" (which I guess was supposed to be a throwback/homage, but seemed more like an out of place parody), utterly retarded antagonists coupled with absolutely hateable "protagonists," a retardedly and pointlessly shoe-horned "family" for Tom Hardy, and general boring girlbossing were my top five. Even heavy drinking couldn't make that pile of shit entertaining.
 
Predator: Badlands looks pretty gay. I don't necessarily hate the idea of the main character being a young outcast Yautja, but the CGI'd face in the trailer looks like dogshit.

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The shaky cam was barely in the top 10 things horrifyingly wrong with that movie. CGI video-toaster insert squibs, "riddled with bullets dancing death" (which I guess was supposed to be a throwback/homage, but seemed more like an out of place parody), utterly retarded antagonists coupled with absolutely hateable "protagonists," a retardedly and pointlessly shoe-horned "family" for Tom Hardy, and general boring girlbossing were my top five. Even heavy drinking couldn't make that pile of shit entertaining.
Nah the shaky cam was the worst thing. Action films can survive a whole lot of dumb shit like you mentioned if the action is top shelf, but instead Gareth went full Taken 3 and shook the camera during all the action. So bad.
 
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This better not have blatant social commentary like Barbarian.
I despise Barbarian so much and it pains me how every major YouTuber and movie critic sucked the dick of this movie. I can't help but feel gaslit by anyone I talk to about it like we didn't watch the same movie. It's as if somewhere out there is an alternate version of a movie called Barbarian that is a fantastic movie. In reality all I see is a movie that blew their budget mid-filming and after realizing how expensive Bill Skarsgard is, made an entire second act that's virtually a different movie. Thus, introducing the titular monster much earlier than intended. A horror monster which is straight up ripped off from a meme that's been circling the internet for nearly half a decade by the time this movie came out. Had I made that image, i'd sue the ever loving fuck out of the director and studio.

In the second act, since the movie is pissing rocks and needs star power they hire Justin Long and take what was once a serious and dramatic tense thriller movie 3 minutes ago and shits all over it by acting like....Well, Justin Long. The movie becomes a virtual trash tier comedy and you can't convince me that this wasn't two scripts taped and stitched together last minute. Justin Long is funny for all of five seconds until you put an ounce of thought into how ungodly cartoonish and stupid his behavior is. There's really no salvaging the movie after that. It just gets dumber and more ridiculous as it goes on. The more answers we get, the dumber and more ridiculous everything becomes. When we finally get to the finale and the message of the movie becomes clear, all I have to say is "Fuck you, you woke piece of trash, trying to hide in sheeps clothing". Honestly, none of this would be a big deal and I'd forget about this movie if it weren't for every creator and person I talk to saying "THIS IS THE BEST MOVIE EVARRRR".

Now, I just hate it. Congratulations, you replaced Suicide Squad as my most hated movie of all time.

Turns out the real Barbarian was MAN, all along.
 
Have you recovered from the horrific shaky cam yet?
the shaky cam on the last bit of the club scene (with the shooting outside) was bad but everything else was okay. It was nothing groundbreaking, but a nice little detective flick. It would be very hard to ever top The Raid and its sequel, so my expectations was already tempered going in.

Speaking of a horror movie from the same guy for thread tax: Apostle. That movie was both weird and okay. I like a movie where it didn't slow itself down to explain literally everything, so it had a strange mythical feel throughout it. But it really feels like it was heavily exhausting itself on the last act though. Like Havoc, it had the potential to be much better, but I enjoyed it for what it was.

I despise Barbarian so much and it pains me how every major YouTuber and movie critic sucked the dick of this movie. I can't help but feel gaslit by anyone I talk to about it like we didn't watch the same movie. It's as if somewhere out there is an alternate version of a movie called Barbarian that is a fantastic movie. In reality all I see is a movie that blew their budget mid-filming and after realizing how expensive Bill Skarsgard is, made an entire second act that's virtually a different movie. Thus, introducing the titular monster much earlier than intended.

I have a miniscule amount of hope this is a retelling of Pied Piper but I'm too burnt out by Barbarian for the same reason. I wouldn't be surprised if the movie did this retarded switching throughout the 3 hour runtine only for the twist to be some hamfisted 'america/school shootings/military/whatever bad' social commentary instead of a cool movie. Especially with the talks of Peele, the guy that spins everything into some race issue, trying to buy the script.
 
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What does one do after building a house down the street from a home known for the murder of five people?
Make a movie!
It's what David Oman did, and he's been talking on his YouTube channel about wanting to get more attention for his movie in hopes of getting a big company to buy it.
It's called "House At The End Of The Drive."
It can be rented for $3.99 at https://houseattheendofthedrive.vhx.tv/

Here's the trailer

David Oman's YouTube channel
https://www.youtube.com/@davidoman
He's interesting.
 
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