/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

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Shek$il said:
Do you have an alternative for horror mockumentaries? I like the Poughkeepsie Tapes but I kind of agree with this.

Also please no Lake Mungo; that movie took forever to go nowhere. The good reviews were a complete circle jerk of "it's SAD HORROR", or "it filled me with DREAD!!". Boring!
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You're so right about Lake Mungo. People gush about it and it's the most underwhelming thing. I felt like I was being trolled when I was watching it.
 
I just watched "The Monkey", a movie I was looking forward to since it got quite the praise... and while I did enjoy the comedy and especially the over the top kills, it seemed after the first third the movie ran out of steam and I simply didn't care about any of the characters anymore.
Still, worth for the gore alone.
 
TV's Adam West said:
It's modern Stephen King. There's your answer.
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I've read every single thing that King has written bar maybe 3 or 4 of his newest books and even i couldn't vaguely enjoy this shit.

I know he is sort of stuck in the 70s/80s with a lot of his creative sensibilities/humour but that movie was fucking painfully shite. He should never be involved in the production of any TV shows/movies based on his writing because he has terrible instincts in regard to filmed media.
 
vittek said:
I just watched "The Monkey", a movie I was looking forward to since it got quite the praise... and while I did enjoy the comedy and especially the over the top kills, it seemed after the first third the movie ran out of steam and I simply didn't care about any of the characters anymore.
Still, worth for the gore alone.
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The Monkey was kind of mid. Everyone said it was so violent but i wasn't really blown away by the kills. Most of the ones that I remember were just people exploding which is funny once or twice but idk. The bees was kind of silly. I just really did not connect with any of the characters. I remember laughing during it but my brain immediately moved on after it ended. Can't remember the last new horror film that I saw that blew me away.
 
I watched The Rule of Jenny Pen and it was...OK. Not really a horror movie, barely a thriller, more of a regular drama I guess. It's a bit slow, but still pretty well carried by Geoffrey Rush and Lithgow. Lithgow's accent is pretty low-rent, but it doesn't bother me as much as it normally would, since he's a pretty convincing lunatic anyway. It's a bit slow in places, and I was watching a better version of the movie in my head as it was going on.

There's no real twist or revelation in the movie, but it does make sense within its own milieu which already puts it head and shoulders above most movies nowadays.

It's a bit annoying, since essentially most of the problems in the movies could've been solved with a cell phone, and it doesn't really explain why the people in the movie don't have them. I mean, granted, they are octogenarians, but that doesn't mean much these days, especially since Rush's character is a recently retired professional.

It also is somewhat boring in the first half since Rush does that thing in ALL harassment movies, where he just tattles and doesn't really fight back, and hopes the system takes care of him. Like, yes, that's probably what most people would do, but we've seen it SO many times. Eventually he does go on the offensive at about the halfway point, and that's where the movie gets quite a bit better, when we're actually seeing Rush vs. Lithgow in all its glory.

All the stuff in the trailer IS in the movie, so it's not a bait and switch or anything, but really the only "horror" in the movie comes from Rush's dementia/stroke-induced decay.

All in all I'd probably give it a 2.5/5. There's probably a 3.0/5 movie in there, if they edited out some of the slower parts. They keep trying to somehow tie the theme in the old folks home back to Rush's career as a judge, but it doesn't make any sense, since he apparently was a good (or at least non-corrupt) one, and Lithgow's character is demonstrably, unequivocally evil. It's not great or a classic, but there are definitely worse ways to spend 90 minutes. Try not to spoil yourself on the ending if you do watch it, because I was pleasantly surprised. By far the best Shudder movie I've seen, despite the fact that there's no real horror in it.

Music nerds might have a chuckle as the local university string quartet decides to do a show for the old folks and they wind up playing Shubert's Death and the Maiden, which seems like a dubious choice.
 
I watched Resolution (2012 movie) the other day. Found it in a folder, don't remember downloading it... Looked at when the file was created, it was more than four years ago. Probably downloaded it after reading this thread years ago.
I started watching it, not looking anything up on the internet and after five or so minutes I thought "oh I hope this isn't a horror movie, I'm not in the mood for that".
Then there was the "oh" moment. Yeah, the movie is actually a certain kind of drama that I sometimes like. Phew, I wasn't in the mood for a horror movie.
It was a horror movie or rather an "unsettling movie". Pretty good, actually. Had I gone in knowing it was a horror movie I might have thought less of it.

Then there's The Endless from 2017, a companion piece, I really liked that one.
 
Calandrino said:
I re-watched April Fool's Day, even though it's the kind of movie that makes you wonder why you watched it once tbh
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Even minus the twist ending where -surprise- no one actually died, it's still very mid. I never once rented it back in the day because I suspected what the twist was. When I finally saw it I was left pretty unimpressed with it even when not taking it as a slasher.

The better April Fools Day movie is Slaughter High AKA April Fools Day.


It's stupid, the plot makes very little sense, and it casts 30-year-olds as highschoolers but it is damn entertaining. The filmmakers got in trouble because (1) the original title was April Fools Day and that would compete with the more famous movie and (2) it was billed as "From the creator's of Friday the 13th" which is only slightly true. It had Harry Manfredini do the score and it was financed by Steve Minasian (New Jersey theater owner who financed Last House on the Left and Friday the 13th not to mention movies like Pieces) so it's only technically true that it's from the creators of Friday the 13th.
 
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