He Man Reboot Announced

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Got through it, cleansing my pallet.

I'd like to say it's not awful but that is trick since it's not being targeted at a general audience, since the thing relies on people watching having some series awareness due to the lack of any setting explanations. And because they want to feel like they're writing an adult series they've got their "bollocks" and "crap" in there so it's not targeted at children.

Teela got done exceptionally dirty in this. I've actually got to give them credit for how easily they made her an unlikable cunt in one move.

Do not throw a fit at parents grieving the loss of a child and demand that they focus on your pain. Good grief.

I'd heckle the humour but most of it is apt for the source material. Also I have a horrible feeling that down the line Andra is going to be regarded as the Scrappy Doo of this run. There's nothing inherently wrong with her but she's meant to be a techy. Who when faced with a locked door is out of her depth.

The Skeletor motive may be the most pathetic thing in the whole run. Making him a literal incel is the sort of thing that the writing room were no doubt slapping their thighs over but you can tell it hit the editors and they looked back in horror. There was no lingering on that stupidity but the line made it in and there's no taking it back.

There were also a number of poorly edited scenes, lines seemingly mouthed in the animation but the actors failed to provide...basically critics giving it so high a rating is a sign of paid for reviews.
 
Notgoodwithusernames said:
Mundane Matt on suicide watch
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He’s been that way ever since the heart attack, literally looking like he’s on the brink of death,
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No shame whatsoever.
 
I never watched He-Man so this doesn't really hit me like some other franchises getting pozzed in Current Year but who exactly is the audience for this? Can you really sustain the pop culture zeitgeist on consoomers that will only stick around watching trash to own da alt-right neckbeards?
 
Morethanabitfoolish said:
Do not throw a fit at parents grieving the loss of a child and demand that they focus on your pain. Good grief.
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This is another thing you could have pretty easily done. Teela can still 100% feel betrayed that Adam couldn't trust her with his secret identity. But I would've had it as her keeping her cool infront of He-Man's parents and then having a scene by herself or venting to Man At Arms where she just lets it loose.
 
StevenJewniverse said:
This is another thing you could have pretty easily done. Teela can still 100% feel betrayed that Adam couldn't trust her with his secret identity. But I would've had it as her keeping her cool infront of He-Man's parents and then having a scene by herself or venting to Man At Arms where she just lets it loose.
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There are lots of ways it could be done well. However instead she did it in response specifically to the one person besides her in that room who had no clue who had just had a fairly massive one-two revelation. A human with a shred of empathy would have recognised that then was not the moment to demand that her pain take center stage or at bare minimum left.
Can't have that though, got to make our main character for the rest of this paint herself as utterly awful.
 
Iceland Heavy said:
I never watched He-Man so this doesn't really hit me like some other franchises getting pozzed in Current Year but who exactly is the audience for this? Can you really sustain the pop culture zeitgeist on consoomers that will only stick around watching trash to own da alt-right neckbeards?
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No, its why pandering to harpies on twitter always fails. The people they are pandering to are broke hipsters who only give a cursory watch (if that) and a twitter like/comment to virtue signal. Only the truly deranged consoomers spend any kind of money and only while the product is popular. Its not enough to compensate for losing the entire consistent and long standing paying audience who now hate your product.
 
Frank D'arbo said:
plus in Bruce Willis' defense, Smith was more professional on the set of Die Hard 4 (which was pre-weed) and he was acting like a dick because he was smoking too much pot.
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You've touched on the main reason why I despise Smith. He is very good at telling stories during his stand-up shows, and he'll tell extremely one-sided versions of events in order to humiliate people he doesn't like, and his fans will instantly believe anything he says. He will publicly BTFO people over petty bullshit...

BUT.

20+ YEARS OF WORKING WITH WEINSTEIN. Not a peep. Not a murmur. Claiming to be super-feminist while keeping your mouth shut about your rapist Executive Producer who was literally trying to coerce Salma Hayek into fucking him on the set of Dogma. He has never said a word about this. Weinstein was committing heinous crimes literally in Smith's presence, and Smith said nothing. To this day, he has never addressed the shit that Weinstein did.

But Bruce Willis told him to get his shit together on the set of a multi-million dollar movie, and so he needs to be publicly savaged and humiliated for it.

Iceland Heavy said:
I never watched He-Man so this doesn't really hit me like some other franchises getting pozzed in Current Year but who exactly is the audience for this? Can you really sustain the pop culture zeitgeist on consoomers that will only stick around watching trash to own da alt-right neckbeards?
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I had a shit-ton of He-Man toys when I was a kid. I had the Castle Greyskull playset, Battlecat, three different versions of He-Man, Skeletor and Robot Skeletor, Fisto, Orko, Teela, etc..
I had completely moved on and completely forgot about He-Man for years, and when I first heard about the Netflix show, I was briefly like "Oooh, they're bringing He-Man back. Might be cool."

Then I realized that it was a Netflix production.
Then I found out that Smith was the Exec Producer
Then I found out about the Teela Show rumors.
Then I saw Smith attacking nobody YouTubers over this (and instantly got Ghostbusters flashbacks)

All of this shit whittled away my interest... and then we found out that everything the YouTubers said was true and that Smith was blatantly lying the whole time.

I wouldn't say I was an adult He-Man fan, but I loved it when I was a kid. It's not a franchise I held onto into adulthood like Star Wars, but I WAS interested in checking it out. At first. Not now though,
Now I'm not even interested in hate-watching it.
 
Had all the toys, grew up watching the old series. I had this motherfucking talking He-Man toothbrush that I treasured as a kid. I still remember the corny shit it said: "I'm He-man, strong as can be. I brush my teeth with regularity. Once in the morning, once at night... to keep my teeth healthy and white."

Feel like I need to dig it out of the box in the attic just to get the shit taste out of my mouth after watching ep 1. I won't be finishing the series.
 
So, I had a couple of hours of work ahead, so I gave this He-man show a whirl for background noise. It is rare for me to be in known of the current trending shit, but this time I saw what was the whole balapalooza about this is.

And yeah, it is pretty bad. First, the obvious, the name of the show is HE_MAN and the masters of the universe, so people wanna watch He-man, and we live in a post Last Jedi World, so if you gonna pull a switcheroo, you don't get to wine about the backlash and reviews bombos.

But personally that doesn't bother me, I never liked He-man, and I already knew the show was going to be about Teela, so whatever. Still, first thing I noticed was how clunky the writting is. The series starts in a celebration for Teela to become a commander or something like that for the kingdom or some shit, and every character comes to compliment Teela in the most awkard and weird way. it isn't really about making Teela the "most special person evar!" or whatever SJW tropes people complain about, it just felt weird.

You guys know the "You're my favorite Customer" meme from The Room?

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Yeah, it felt like that, thta was the first impression of the show, and first impressions stick.

Then later it becomes a quest to get the halves of the broken sword and the thing plays pretty straight forward as most of these action adventures go, but there isn't much else to not, except the big elephant in the room, Teela herself.

Look, I hate the whole "what were they thinking!!!???" retard youtuber critic cliche, but I was really puzzled on why they have decided to portrait their main heroine like that, she makes the reveal of Adam being He-man the worst thing that could ever happen, and all she acted upon was that she was betrayed, throwing a tantrum and chastising even the griefing parents.

yeah, it is a freaking He-man show, no I'm not gonna hold these characters for a grounded and reasonable characterization, there would be no drama otherwise, but since the show now wants to have gravitas, Teela acting during the show isn't just callus and selfish but downright non-sensical. She makes such a big deal about being left in the dark and how everybody deceived her, but she never asked "WHY" they did that, to the point she is acting in such a dense fashion like that, berating a guy who just sacrificed himself to save the freaking universe, which is a meme right now.

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And the weird thing is, had they not portraited Teela like that, the series would be ok. Yeah, nothing to write home about, and the dialogue and writting doesn't improve much, but the characters are likeable enough and the action is fun, He-man fans would be still be butthurt, but the rest would still be invested somewhat in the story.

I don't know if they were setting this up for a character arc for Teela or whatever, but at the same time, her characterization just made a drag to watch and it isn't like the show is all that good to begin with.

This show is more interesting as time capsule for the weird times we live in rather than being fun itself, but at this point I just want the show runners to pull the fucking trigger and make the black woman who loves the science the next He-man, fucking do it you pussies!
 
Commander Shepard said:
Had all the toys, grew up watching the old series. I had this motherfucking talking He-Man toothbrush that I treasured as a kid.
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Bruh, I had Battle-Damage He-Man AND Skeletor when I was a kid. The whole concept of this toy blew my fucking mind when I was really young. You'd tap the chest armour, and it would get all dented and shit because of some weird spring-loaded mechanism in the toy.

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Bolo said:
Then later it becomes a quest to get the halves of the broken sword and the thing plays pretty straight forward as most of these action adventures go, but there isn't much else to not, except the big elephant in the room, Teela herself.

Look, I hate the whole "what were they thinking!!!???" retard youtuber critic cliche, but I was really puzzled on why they have decided to portrait their main heroine like that
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I recommend trying to find some interview footage of Kevin Smith's wife. Teela will VERY SUDDENLY make a whole lot more sense. I'm not joking when I say that I think Smith based Nu-Teela on his wife. She has injected herself into every single one of his films since Dogma, so it makes total sense that he would write a Jen Schwalbach-Smith version of Teela for his bullshit tv show and why he got so angry when the YouTubers started calling it the Teela Show. It also makes sense why Smith didn't see a problem with Teela being a such a massively unlikeable cunt because his wife is literally the exact same thing.
 
The Demon Baby said:
I had a shit-ton of He-Man toys when I was a kid. I had the Castle Greyskull playset, Battlecat, three different versions of He-Man, Skeletor and Robot Skeletor, Fisto, Orko, Teela, etc..
I had completely moved on and completely forgot about He-Man for years, and when I first heard about the Netflix show, I was briefly like "Oooh, they're bringing He-Man back. Might be cool."

Then I realized that it was a Netflix production.
Then I found out that Smith was the Exec Producer
Then I found out about the Teela Show rumors.
Then I saw Smith attacking nobody YouTubers over this (and instantly got Ghostbusters flashbacks)

All of this shit whittled away my interest... and then we found out that everything the YouTubers said was true and that Smith was blatantly lying the whole time.

I wouldn't say I was an adult He-Man fan, but I loved it when I was a kid. It's not a franchise I held onto into adulthood like Star Wars, but I WAS interested in checking it out. At first. Not now though,
Now I'm not even interested in hate-watching it.
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All I honestly knew about He-Man was lol 80s homoeroticism jokes, so I was expecting a modern day sequel to just lean into it. Might've been covered in layers of modern day irony and post-irony but it might've been watchable, especially since people thought it was still going to have decent action at first if the beginning of the thread is anything to go by. Pushing him aside for yet another obnoxious strong woman Captain Marvel carbon copy shouldn't be surprising in hindsight but it still somehow is.
 
From The Uncanny Valley said:
That trait can easily be exploited...
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Honestly, the best way to properly deal with Smith is to bring up Weinstein over and over again when you get into a Twitter beef with the SJWs. Force them to confront the fact that they are going to bat for someone who tacitly covered up for Harvey for more than two decades. They are defending someone who quietly protected one of the worst serial rapists in Hollywood history.

Also... start bringing up the old jokes from Clerks, Chasing Amy, and Mallrats, and ask the SJWs why they feel comfortable supporting someone who talks about women the way he did.

Use their own rules against them.
 
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