💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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FatNero said:
I'm super excited for the release that will have all the cobbled together styles from all the different cinematographers they conned into making 1/29th of the movie. Oh and the changing actors in each roll every other scene. That'll be great.
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I can only assume this will be enhanced by 15 different editors, 4 of which were paid in bologna sandwiches and popsicles, as would befit Maradonia. Can you imagine the crazy shit that has gone on behind the scenes? Like gardener/cinematographers holding footage for ransom, GunTech begging wary marks/investors to give him their credit cards because his own keep getting mysteriously declined, etc. There's a great history of movies about the foibles of making movies but I have a feeling that nobody would believe a legit documentary about the making of Maradonia.
 
She was raised by professional grifters, lying comes naturally to her. I stand by my theory. Her real life is shitty, so she constructed a fake life where she's happy and successful. Her dad has a charge of domestic battery, I wonder if Gloria ever suffered his wrath. She's becoming less a lolcow and more of a tragicow.
 
TheIncredibleLioness said:
I know this one picture doesn't deserve this much thought, but the Porno comparison is pretty spot on -- she looks more like some sort of sex doll than a person. I tried redrawing her to see what I could do, and while this is absolute crap, having something like this side by side with the original is...interesting:

maradonia_woman_redraw_zpse9f5218d.jpg

(Original doodle on the left, Tesch in the middle, and my sloppy coloured version on the right)

Of course, this isn't a fair comparison, since a) I did this in an hour, tops, so it's not my best work (whereas I'm sure that Mrs. Tesch put effort into hers), and
b) I used Photoshop, which as we all know, is blocky and low resolution compared to this brilliant example of hand artery

(Never mind that this unknown woman-monster never actually appears in the story; she's the first thing a potential reader will see, and while 'don't judge a book by its' cover' is a fine lesson...let's face it, people are going to make assumptions based on what they see.)

Okay, I'll stop spergin' over art now, since there are far worse things about this series than that. I just thought it was an interesting exercise and thought you might like to see. :)
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Your Maradonia cover is infinitely superior to Mrs Teshh's. You've managed to turn a blow up doll into an attractive young woman. And yeah, the original seems strangely tilted to the left.
 
DrJonesHat said:
She was raised by professional grifters, lying comes naturally to her. I stand by my theory. Her real life is shitty, so she constructed a fake life where she's happy and successful. Her dad has a charge of domestic battery, I wonder if Gloria ever suffered his wrath. She's becoming less a lolcow and more of a tragicow.
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Well, she's following in her dad's footsteps. I don't expect the end result to look much different from his.

trip2themoon said:
Your Maradonia cover is infinitely superior to Mrs Teshh's. You've managed to turn a blow up doll into an attractive young woman. And yeah, the original seems strangely tilted to the left.
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That was posted over two years ago, for god's sake. Are you catparty?
 
Pretty sure that stupid "Equal Warriors" video that was posted a page or two back isn't part of the Maradonia movie. Seems to me like it was just a random short that Gloria made to stretch her directorial muscles (she's totally multi-talented, you guys).

Also, it didn't occur to me until now but Gloria Tesch reminds me of Brooke Hogan, except without the pedigree or a dad with money.
 
IJustWantToSeeAttachments said:
Well, she's following in her dad's footsteps. I don't expect the end result to look much different from his.
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If anything, it might be considerably worse. She doesn't strike me as bright or manipulative enough to sustain a career as a con-artist or phony evangelist. The best she can hope for is to get scooped up by a sugar-daddy, and her competition for that goal is stiff, and getting worse as she ages.
 
TheIncredibleLioness said:
I know this one picture doesn't deserve this much thought, but the Porno comparison is pretty spot on -- she looks more like some sort of sex doll than a person. I tried redrawing her to see what I could do, and while this is absolute crap, having something like this side by side with the original is...interesting:

maradonia_woman_redraw_zpse9f5218d.jpg

(Original doodle on the left, Tesch in the middle, and my sloppy coloured version on the right)

Of course, this isn't a fair comparison, since a) I did this in an hour, tops, so it's not my best work (whereas I'm sure that Mrs. Tesch put effort into hers), and
b) I used Photoshop, which as we all know, is blocky and low resolution compared to this brilliant example of hand artery

(Never mind that this unknown woman-monster never actually appears in the story; she's the first thing a potential reader will see, and while 'don't judge a book by its' cover' is a fine lesson...let's face it, people are going to make assumptions based on what they see.)

Okay, I'll stop spergin' over art now, since there are far worse things about this series than that. I just thought it was an interesting exercise and thought you might like to see. :)
Click to expand...
I used to think this blonde woman is supposed to be Maya?
And the "half-Gorgon" effect could have been metaphorical... I didn't read this drivel, but don't the two teenagers behave like absolute psychopaths as soon as they are given magic and power in Gloriadonia?
 
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So it's been a while since I posted here, but here's another little gem to add to this turd pile. So, as some of you may know, some authors like to give themselves a logo to stick in the mind. So let's look at Tolkien's one.
f55d941c44a8086671d4bae6c3e06f9c.png

As you can see, it incorporates all the letters in his name, creating a nice rune like symbol. Little Miss Tesch, being original, decided to do something similar.

d03407b885f0e34599612ffcc1e3544a.png

World's youngest and most original novelist.
 
How many things has Gloria stolen throughout her tenure?

The world may never know!
 
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