Just thinking about how by not simping for Alice he could have: avoided a somewhat credible sexual assault/rape accusation, denied content to the haters, and now on top of that he could have saved enough money to not have to use his step-daddy's credit card for a marriage license. People with low-impulse control need to be kept away from wannabe e-girls for their own safety, but this was already known.
Congrats to Pantsu for finally locking him down. Hopefully Ethan won't be able to be able to take part of the Subway check as alimony after this ends.