🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%

  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%

  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%

  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%
  • Total voters
    961
Or use Write or Die on Kamikaze Mode (select it from the drop-down menu at the bottom the panel instead of the option button, or just scroll down on this page and use the original app), because nothing motivates you like the text editor deleting your work.
 
Big Boss said:
I'm a bit torn: on the one hand it's funny seeing this guy get mad and scream that people are stupid faggots.

On the other, I want to offer genuine advice about getting his shit together.
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I hear you. I am probably never going to stop white knighting him.
 
i think scott adams is following this thread. these are from this tuesday and wednesday:

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I think I know why Connor is not replying guys... My brother's name is Connor and he is on a road trip right now and have you ever seen the two in the same place? Hmmmmmm?
 
I guess he's finally decided to take all of your advice and on the road to self-improvement.
He's probably jerking off to Molly Ringwald right now. Or math class. Same thing
 
Accel_Rider said:
I guess he's finally decided to take all of your advice and on the road to self-improvement.
He's probably jerking off to Molly Ringwald right now. Or math class. Same thing
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But that would require Connor to be able to multitask something while doing math, even if it involves Molly Ringwald's belly button, that's just too much for him.

The math comes first.
 
Emiya Kiwitsugu said:
But that would require Connor to be able to multitask something while doing math, even if it involves Molly Ringwald's belly button, that's just too much for him.

The math comes first.
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Now, now, this is Connor. We all know Molly Ringwald comes first. The math will have to wait until the very last minute, after Connor's finished jerking off and complaining about how hard math is.
 
Would he even get to the jerking off? Connor strikes me at the person that would give up trying to find any erotic pictures of Molly Ringwald after two Google Image Search pages and then complaining about how hard it is to find his fap material. Probably on here, since we're the last people on the Internet who will actually give him the time of day.

Oh, and it'll somehow be our fault if it's edgy Connor.
 
Sanae Kochiya said:
Would he even get to the jerking off? Connor strikes me at the person that would give up trying to find any erotic pictures of Molly Ringwald after two Google Image Search pages and then complaining about how hard it is to find his fap material. Probably on here, since we're the last people on the Internet who will actually give him the time of day.

Oh, and it'll somehow be our fault if it's edgy Connor.
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https://static.kiwifarms.net/data/avatars/l/0/1.jpg?1438659863
 
Sanae Kochiya said:
Would he even get to the jerking off? Connor strikes me at the person that would give up trying to find any erotic pictures of Molly Ringwald after two Google Image Search pages and then complaining about how hard it is to find his fap material. Probably on here, since we're the last people on the Internet who will actually give him the time of day.

Oh, and it'll somehow be our fault if it's edgy Connor.
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His loss. I've found some AMAZING photoshopped nudies of Molly. Not sharing tho.
 
My favorite thing about Connor is that he just doesn't fucking get it. He's been in TS and we've given him great advice about how to better himself or his writing and he just doesn't fucking get it. And then he turns around and says we are the assholes and that we are picking on him. It's like.... We tried bud. We wanted you to succeed. But just because we wanted the best for you, doesn't mean we won't laugh our asses off when you do the shit you do.

Connor was a member, like any of us, before this. He knew the rules. He's the perfect example of what can happen when someone powerlevels too hard and people start noticing the inner lolcow.

So I'm around-about way... I like all the Connors, because each one makes Connor the lolcow he is today and provides enjoyment for us all.
 
Yeah. Connor totally brought all this upon himself. He chooses not to take decent advice, and make a fool out of himself.
 
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Since this thread is becoming more of an advice thread for Connor ever since his hilarious recent Loveshy outbursts, I'll post this again:

  • Don't White Knight. Don't turn threads with people of interest into an intervention. You are not their protector. If you want to help, contact them privately.
Dr. Meme said:
To all the future readers of this thread stop filling the thread with "Connor where is the book report?!?!?"
Because:
  1. He's not gonna do it anyway and even if he does he'll half ass it.
  2. It makes him less likely to want to do it because you've placed so much pressure on a small project that should be at least a little fun for him
  3. It places self importance on yourself and makes you look like a smug asshole
  4. It shits up the thread and makes it a chore to read through
  5. No one curr
Seriously this has been a problem for a while and it utterly buries the other enjoyable content here.

EDIT: this also goes for Alphaboy and Redesigning Eva. The only person who this negatively effects is Connor.
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Dr. Meme said:
This isn't a self help forum. Connor won't listen to you and you sure as hell won't change his life.

"Well I was lazy and didn't do anything for god knows how long, but then some faggot with a Cartoon Network character profile pic on the kiwi farms told me in a passive agressive tone that I should probably write a book.
I consider that the moment when I realized how horrible my life had been up until now. It was those words of inspiration "connor u whiny fat faggot were is my new chapeter of redesigning eva. If I were u I would have written tho whole book by now" that made me write a New York Times best selling novel." -Future Connor Bible
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Connor has almost never listened to advice ever since he signed up here and it's pointless to give him again. It's like telling Chris to give up on his lovequest or telling a Tumblrina to stop hating on cis people. (Which do not work)

Instead, let's laugh at Connor and enjoy his outbursts. :julay:
 
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