🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[Abby]

I'm just gonna imagine the Golden Lions are the Deagle Nation of the Connorverse. Makes it funner.

 

[lolwut]

I knew I heard that name before; the Golden Lions are already an Army unit, composed of US Infantry, Kurds, and Iraqi soldiers.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

A single day's worth of writing does not warrant it's own thread.

Imagine if you wrote that much everyday.

Agreed. Remember Connor's "Get It Together" thread that lasted a whole 45 minutes before he flaked out?

I thought I saw @Hellblazer a bit ago----could you merge the Alphaboy thread with this one, pretty please?


I still swear I've heard "Janus City" somewhere before. It's bothering me. But I can't find anything.

 

[EI 903]

Merged the Alphaboy thread into this one.

 

[Hat]

I still swear I've heard "Janus City" somewhere before. It's bothering me. But I can't find anything.

Old concept in the Connorverse, and the setting of Redesigning Eva way back when it was an even edgier and more futuristic/cyber-punk-esque story, as seen in the 2011 "Chaos Draft."

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

Old concept in the Connorverse, and the setting of Redesigning Eva way back when it was an even edgier and more futuristic/cyber-punk-esque story, as seen in the 2011 "Chaos Draft."

AH, that's it! Thanks, @Hat!

Also, did we pile on @Connor a little too hard? Honestly, Alphaboy wasn't too bad. I'm glad he finally posted it, though disappointed that he stopped writing before. . .anything actually happened.

Now that I think about it, wasn't Static Shock a young black superhero with a scrawny white best friend (who was also gay)? I feel like Sean & Nate are kind of the inverse of that. Also, I really love the unintentional homoerotic subtext. "White & black merged. . ."

If Sean x Nate doesn't happen I will be so upset.

 

[Hat]

Also, did we pile on @Connor a little too hard?

No.

Honestly, Alphaboy wasn't too bad. I'm glad he finally posted it, though disappointed that he stopped writing before. . .anything actually happened.

Yeah, to be frank, although Connor's writing itself has improved—slightly—what has been posted so far of Alphaboy is not anywhere near as memorable or interesting as Redesigning Eva, except perhaps the whole merging of white and black thing.

 

[The Knife]

Sean's eyes were drawn to Nate's taut abs. The front of his skin-tight tank top had pulled up slightly, and Sean could just see the tempting trail of jet-black hair disappearing beneath the waistband of his jeans...Sean swallowed hard and wrenched his gaze back to Nate's handsome, rugged face. "Lookin' good, dawg," he said. God, was his voice trembling? Had Nate heard?

But Nate's broad grin was a little too tight, a little too tense. It did not reach his eyes, which seemed soft, lost, vulnerable. "Yeah, man, you too," he said. "I been thinking about you a lot lately. Things just weren't right in Chicago without you."

"You could have called," said Sean, trying to keep the accusation out of his voice.

Nate rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes dropped to the sidewalk. "Been busy, man. Real busy."

"Yeah," Sean agreed. "Me too."

The awkward silence stretched out between them. Sean's underarms grew damp with nervous sweat. Neither of them moved until the sudden squeal of the school bus's brakes creaked in the morning air. Sean glanced up the street. The Audi was still parked at the corner, and the bus was lumbering up the block.

Suddenly he laughed. He slapped Nate on the shoulder. "You know what? Fuck this. Let's cut class. We got a lot of catching up to do."

Nate looked back up at him. His eyes shone with a strange emotion. Relief? Maybe. "Same old Sean," he said, and grinned. "Yeah, fuck this. Let's go."

 

[Golly]

Sean's eyes were drawn to Nate's taut abs. The front of his skin-tight tank top had pulled up slightly, and Sean could just see the tempting trail of jet-black hair disappearing beneath the waistband of his jeans...Sean swallowed hard and wrenched his gaze back to Nate's handsome, rugged face. "Lookin' good, dawg," he said. God, was his voice trembling? Had Nate heard?

But Nate's broad grin was a little too tight, a little too tense. It did not reach his eyes, which seemed soft, lost, vulnerable. "Yeah, man, you too," he said. "I been thinking about you a lot lately. Things just weren't right in Chicago without you."

"You could have called," said Sean, trying to keep the accusation out of his voice.

Nate rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes dropped to the sidewalk. "Been busy, man. Real busy."

"Yeah," Sean agreed. "Me too."

The awkward silence stretched out between them. Sean's underarms grew damp with nervous sweat. Neither of them moved until the sudden squeal of the school bus's brakes creaked in the morning air. Sean glanced up the street. The Audi was still parked at the corner, and the bus was lumbering up the block.

Suddenly he laughed. He slapped Nate on the shoulder. "You know what? Fuck this. Let's cut class. We got a lot of catching up to do."

Nate looked back up at him. His eyes shone with a strange emotion. Relief? Maybe. "Same old Sean," he said, and grinned. "Yeah, fuck this. Let's go."

I ship it.

 

[Stratomsk]

Sean's eyes were drawn to Nate's taut abs. The front of his skin-tight tank top had pulled up slightly, and Sean could just see the tempting trail of jet-black hair disappearing beneath the waistband of his jeans...Sean swallowed hard and wrenched his gaze back to Nate's handsome, rugged face. "Lookin' good, dawg," he said. God, was his voice trembling? Had Nate heard?

But Nate's broad grin was a little too tight, a little too tense. It did not reach his eyes, which seemed soft, lost, vulnerable. "Yeah, man, you too," he said. "I been thinking about you a lot lately. Things just weren't right in Chicago without you."

"You could have called," said Sean, trying to keep the accusation out of his voice.

Nate rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes dropped to the sidewalk. "Been busy, man. Real busy."

"Yeah," Sean agreed. "Me too."

The awkward silence stretched out between them. Sean's underarms grew damp with nervous sweat. Neither of them moved until the sudden squeal of the school bus's brakes creaked in the morning air. Sean glanced up the street. The Audi was still parked at the corner, and the bus was lumbering up the block.

Suddenly he laughed. He slapped Nate on the shoulder. "You know what? Fuck this. Let's cut class. We got a lot of catching up to do."

Nate looked back up at him. His eyes shone with a strange emotion. Relief? Maybe. "Same old Sean," he said, and grinned. "Yeah, fuck this. Let's go."

You should continue this story, I think @Connor would hopefully be able to take a few tips from the way you write his two main characters as an OTP. Hilarity will ensue.

 

[Ruin]

Do you still fap 10+ times daily?

 

[registereduser]

I give so many ratings in this thread, istg. Y'all are too witty and insightful.

Alphaboy is endearing to me because it reminds me of my old writing. @Connor, keep writing -practice, practice, practice! Also, definitely read more. You'll start noticing how writers structure their stories and developing more natural-sounding ways of conveying your ideas. Good effort, keep it up :-)

 

[Sigyn]

Spoiler: Connor Fanfic

Night was falling as Connor slumped into his computer chair. With a sigh, he swiped the tall stack of loose-leaf paper off of his desk, sending failed math tests and a crumpled magazine cut out of Molly Ringwald scattered across his dirty carpet. He stared blankly into the computer screen, and willed himself to write. It wasn't until ten minutes had past that he heard his mother slam something down on the kitchen counter in the other room. He could hear his name being mentioned, and figured that his mom was just being a bitch again. The word document which had lay dormant on his computer desktop for almost an hour seemed to mock him. AlphaBoy can wait, he thought to himself, I have to... attend t- no. WORK, the Farms. In the other room, his father could be heard ranting and banging around, the word "Responsibility" being the only one loud enough to actually hear clearly. Connor paid no mind to this, and chuckled at his pun as he logged on to Kiwi Farms, the forum Connor revolved his life around. His computer being unnaturally slow, he closed his tab of lewd "Breakfast Club" fan art and the novel-in-progress that he KNEW would be his lasting legacy. He deleted the three PMs from a user named @BOLDYSPICY! , imploring him to 'get his act together!' and, as per habit, checked @Null 's profile page for activity. He flipped the bird to the picture of Bane that represented Null, and then finally, finally, entered his thread. I'll show them this time, he thought. They're gonna be impressed this time. I mean, I wrote 2000 fucking words. That's 1000 more words than last time. If they say THIS isn't good enough, then they're just trolling and I don't have to listen to them.

As it turned out, two thousand words in a week was NOT good enough for Kiwi Farms, and by the time the users truly started critiquing him, he had already thrown his keyboard across the room in frustration and stalked to the bathroom. When he returns, it will be with sticky hands, the same attitude, and exactly 2000 words.

I took some liberties with what I know about Connor. Here's a 360 word drabble about the life of Connor that took about 20 minutes. @Connor , I am not very skilled at writing. I DARE you to do better.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Sorry, I get the Cubs and Bears mixed up. Also, the Janus City team is fictional, as is its home city.

The Cubs and Angels play in different leagues btw

 

[trueandhonestfan]

I knew I heard that name before; the Golden Lions are already an Army unit, composed of US Infantry, Kurds, and Iraqi soldiers.

I haven't read this thread since March (I believe) so when I came back and people were talking about something it seemed like Connor made up (at least to somebody who hasn't read this in a while) I immediately assumed it was taken from something. Talk about predictable.

 

[Rammspieler]

Since everybody but me has spent their energy in a futile attempt at trying to reach Connor, then it is my turn now. A lone block of text, no matter whom it belongs to, may not reach him. But I suspect that one day, something will snap in him. Shit, if Adam82, from the Love-Shy forums finally managed to move out of his emotionally abusive family's house (albeit if only to live in a bungalow in their backyard), then perhaps the day will come for Connor too. Not now, nor in the foreseeable future. But it will come. I'm sure of it.

Connor, I and the aforementioned Adam82 are way older than you. We're both in our 30's. Of course, as far as I know, I'm pretty much neurotypical and hence I didn't have the excuse of autism to fall on for my failings. Adam82 does have Asperger's, however. Nevertheless, I was pretty much a NEET who spent the better part of a decade wasting time in college and failing my classes whilst blaming most of the world for my problems and being a general Nice Guy(TM), wondering why girls didn't like me. Adam, has his own story and at least he finished college and is a teacher. But he too blamed his autism on his problems and still has this huge oneitis on this one girl he met once, at a Halloween party, years ago, and won't give her up, despite only seeing her that one time.

I consider myself a writer as well and I used to dream of the day when I would have tons of books out and shit. But then I realized that my output just isn't enough and I lack to drive and the inspiration to write on even a semi-regular basis. I spent like 5 years not writing before shit happened on the Love-Shy forums and that gave me the drive and the inspiration to start up my now abandoned blog. Last I wrote for it was like about a year ago and it took me a year to update it, once I started my job. I don't know when I'll get the inspiration to just sit down and write again. I admit that I'm also a huge procrastinator. But I've come to peace with the fact that I may never write a book, nor may I never write professionally because I feel like I can't write on a regular basis with out my material looking like crap. Shit, my last blog entry was crap by my standards since I pretty much forced myself to finish it because I promised someone that I would. But I do know that when I do write and I'm in the mood for it, my shit is damn good. Maybe you just need to let go of this idea of being the next great sci-fi novelist and lifting ideas from anime and most of your characters are Mary Sue's of you and the people you're crushing on. Believe me, when I was in high school, I too used to dream of writing the next awesome sci-fi/fantasy novel, with most of the plot based on the JRPGs I was playing at the time and the main charcter was basically my Mary Sue and the leading lady being the Mary Sue of Britney Spears when she was starting out (Yes, I had a crush on her, don't ask).

I think it would be best if you started looking for a job, even if it's "below you". I too used to doubt my abilities doing any kind of work that I thought was "below" me. But time and seeing myself turning into a non-retarded version of Chris-Chan, as well as being shamed twice by my own sister, developing feelings for a girl who didn't live close to me, etc. was what got me out of it. But mostly it was not wanting to become Chris and dying alone in a decrepit house. You don't want to be like Chris, do you? Believe me, once you're on your own, making you're own money and not relying on a tugboat and knowing that you have you're shit because you worked for it... Best feeling ever. At least I think it should be because a part of me still thinks that I'm a loser and that I don't deserve nice things. But that's something that I acknowledge that I need to face one day. Just like you're own shit. I just hope that working on my own inner shit won't take me as long as it took me to finally move out. You're still young. Don't wait another ten years like I did. You'll regret it.

 

[Abby]

The Cubs and Angels play in different leagues btw

I'd assumed he meant the Angels were the Janus City team, since he named Chicago as the city of the Bears so he probably meant football. It was confusing though.

 

[Meowthkip]

In the Connorverse, the Golden Lions is not only a disbanded group, but a "nonexistent" one. Two words: black ops.

I rolled with the Red Jaguars myself.

AH, that's it! Thanks, @Hat!

Also, did we pile on @Connor a little too hard? Honestly, Alphaboy wasn't too bad. I'm glad he finally posted it, though disappointed that he stopped writing before. . .anything actually happened.

Now that I think about it, wasn't Static Shock a young black superhero with a scrawny white best friend (who was also gay)? I feel like Sean & Nate are kind of the inverse of that. Also, I really love the unintentional homoerotic subtext. "White & black merged. . ."

If Sean x Nate doesn't happen I will be so upset.

Connor, if you don't make this canon, I will call you a queer-baiting homophobe on Tumblr.

 

[Philosophy Zombie]

Meh, I don't want to pressure Connor into doing things with his story that he doesn't want to do. That's probably just me though.

 

[Chipmunk's Bounty]

It's not like he took our advice about anything else.