🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

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Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%
  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%
  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%
  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%

  • Total voters
    961
Connor, you have not "experienced ugliness and betrayal". The thing that's thrown your plans into turmoil is GOING TO THE SHOPS WITH YOUR FUCKING GRANDMOTHER.

The fact that you would try to blow this incredibly mundane distraction into some kind of epic romantic struggle is laughable. Your difficulties are not worthy of a heroic protagonist. They are unremarkable, pedestrian, humdrum. Even if we take the most indulgent approach to your claims about how hard your life is, you are not experiencing any issues that hundreds of thousands of Americans aren't simultaneously experiencing. I could throw a brick out the window and odds are I'd hit somebody who is having a harder time than you.

Trying to portray yourself as the protagonist of some baroque epic and your setbacks as some grand struggle with destiny is not helping you overcome your problems. Abandoning this ludicrous heroic self-conception is only going to help you. And it will also make you seem less ridiculous, which may not directly help you achieve your goals, but it sure can't hurt.
 
Connor, if I recall correctly from earlier in the thread, you lost control of your income (it doesn't go directly to you). Why did that happen? Is that why you're saying you can't move out on your own?
 
Well Connor, its only going to get worse if you don't change anything. There's no use in moaning about circumstances when you can change them.
 
You know what? Fuck all of you. What gives you the right to tell me how to live and how to think?
Get a job, take more classes, sign up for financial aid/scholarships/federal student loans, move out, go volunteer at the library, and lose your pessimistic attitude.
 
I'm sick and tired of your macho, "misery builds character" bullshit.

You're missing the point. People are saying you don't have it that miserable. That you need to take more of a stand for yourself, that you give up too easily. You ignore any actual good advice and cherry pick what you can bitch about.
 
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