🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[Connor Bible]

@Connor Bible , is this a way to deflect attention from the fact that you haven't written your parody?

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

Sure thing George McFly.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

@Connor Bible quit multiposting or I'm going to ban you from this thread for a week.

 

[MasterDisaster]

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

Is it time for edgy rebel mode again?

 

[Connor Bible]

Is it time for edgy rebel mode again?

Uh, no.

 

[JU 199]

 

[MasterDisaster]

Uh, no.

Now's not the time for sassy pants, Connor. There's writing to be done and procrastination's to come up with.

 

[Connor Bible]

Now's not the time for sassy pants, Connor. There's writing to be done and procrastination's to come up with.

Will do. I got about an hour ago. When I write, I try to work myself into a trance.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

No, no, I have every intention of finishing the first chapter of my parody soon.

I'm so happy I could cry. I don't care how autistic I'm being, I'm legit happy to have you back & I'm thrilled you're taking steps to improve yourself.

EDIT: I promise not to shit all over your writing this time.

Here is proof that I'm working on it.

Spoiler: excerpt

There once lived a young man in the lower Carolinas by the name of Connor. He was the son of a well-liked, well-educated man of modest means and numerous friends who worked two jobs to support his family. Connor and his mother, his father’s second wife, were unemployed, leaving the father to be the sole breadwinner. He had sired another son from his previous marriage, which ended in divorce; that lad was now in his early thirties, happily married, and a successful attorney. The father had felt that he had done an excellent job with this boy, but lamented that he had let Connor down. Now of twenty-two years, his cherry not popped, and his hands not given a tool with which he can rise to the positions of his father and half-brother, Connor had grown into an ass. He predominantly resided within his room at his parent’s household, wasting valuable opportunity with each video game he played or each expulsion of millions of potential sons and daughters from his cod.

When I'm done with the whole story, it would be awesome if @MasterDisaster read it. Don't worry, the story isn't going to be overly dark and morose. I imagine it being akin to a Monty Python movie at its most morbid.

We're still expecting that story connor.

Come on, guys. Don't shit on him just yet. He just came back. Let's see what he has to say.

What's the point? How many times has he claimed to have "changed" now?

I know, but. . .it's been a while since he posted here. I wanna see him actually follow through with something for a change before people start tearing into him.

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

Apologies to @Ruin & @Segue . You guys called it, & I went "nooo, that won't happen, I believe in Connor" like I haven't been reading the last five hundred-some pages.

I can't really blame him, but it's still disappointing.

 

[CatParty]

Not Another Teen Movie,

>these days

>2001

>15 years ago

>these days

 

[chimpburgers]

@Connor Bible Do you need more kettlebell to get the creative juices flowing?

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

@Thundersteam is considering getting a Kettleball, you should too @Connor Bible

 

[Ruin]

Apologies to @Ruin & @Segue . You guys called it, & I went "nooo, that won't happen, I believe in Connor" like I haven't been reading the last five hundred-some pages.

I can't really blame him, but it's still disappointing.

I actually wouldn't shit on his work for no reason. If he actually wrote something that looks like he put effort into it I'd be thrilled. But every time he comes here he ignores sound advice and posts fragments of what looks like a fifth graders fan fiction complete with spelling/mechanical errors and unnecessarily inflated prose.

What we have here is a man of below average intelligence trying to write a novel, which even the most optimistic of us here have to admit it won't happen.

 

[VLAD]

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

If you think giving valid criticism of your work is shitting on it, then you're already destined to fail. You need to develop a thick skin if you want to be taken seriously; it's only through the criticism of others that your work can actually become good at all.

If you take this approach to criticism, you'll become the Andrew Dobson of writing. And that's assuming you'll actually write anything at all.

 

[Coster]

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

How will @MasterDisaster read it if you don't post it?

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

I don't think writing the parody is practical. If anything I write and post on here's going to be shit on, I'm not going to bother posting my work.

Cry me a river Connor.

Constructive criticism is not the same thing as shitting all over your work. You put out a product that has issues and we point them out. You choices are to a) fix the problems or b) shit yourself and do absolutely nothing about it because we're being "haters".

Here's the thing. If you were to ever write your novel and send it out to a publisher, based on what I've read so far, it would get rejected. Now listening to us will not guarantee you getting published but ignoring us will not help you any more. You need to grow as a writer if you plan on actually getting published by a real publisher. What we're not going to do is give you false hope and say your work is brilliant when it isn't.

The choice in the end is yours.

 

[Connor Bible]

Cry me a river Connor.

Constructive criticism is not the same thing as shitting all over your work. You put out a product that has issues and we point them out. You choices are to a) fix the problems or b) shit yourself and do absolutely nothing about it because we're being "haters".

Here's the thing. If you were to ever write your novel and send it out to a publisher, based on what I've read so far, it would get rejected. Now listening to us will not guarantee you getting published but ignoring us will not help you any more. You need to grow as a writer if you plan on actually getting published by a real publisher. What we're not going to do is give you false hope and say your work is brilliant when it isn't.

The choice in the end is yours.

But here's the thing: even if I did fix the problems, you'd probably still find something to bitch about just because I'm a lolcow.

 

[VLAD]

But here's the thing: even if I did fix the problems, you'd probably still find something to bitch about just because I'm a lolcow.

That's no excuse. Has being a cow stopped Christian from releasing astounding new installments of Sonichu?

Reading recommendation: Letters to a Young Poet by R. M. Rilke. Keep writing until you realize what you were meant to write.

 

[JU 199]

But here's the thing: even if I did fix the problems, you'd probably still find something to bitch about just because I'm a lolcow.

Connor, you keep setting yourself up for this. One minute you wanna write a lolcow comedy biopic of yourself and others regardless of the consequences and the next you wanna write a million dollar script for molly ringwald. Neither of these pastimes are productive and would solve your writing issues BUT you act surprised when anyone mentions it.

 

[Connor Bible]

That's no excuse. Has being a cow stopped Christian from releasing astounding new installments of Sonichu?

Reading recommendation: Letters to a Young Poet by R. M. Rilke. Keep writing until you realize what you were meant to write.

I didn't say I would stop writing. I usually get about a hundred words in a day. I'm so wrapped up in school and other shit that I hardly find the time. But I guess that's no excuse either. I'm legitimately shaking in my shoes and choking when I have Word open. I start sweating. My thoughts race. As a result, I can barely put a word down. The fact I could even put down a hundred words, let alone fifty, is a miracle.