🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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Based on some in-depth and time consuming research, Oklahoma as the moving destination looks better and better. They are currently rated near dead last on best states for Forklift Operators and Amber could increase demand for the state as a whole and get a cheap price to boot. Maybe next caretaker gorlfriend will be certified and ease up the cost to move her from room to room.
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Shitty Article Archive
 
lol cow supreme said:
Sumo comes up surprisingly little in her thread. Mostly talking about her hair or how she could sumo wrestle Becky etc. however...

The first mention of Sumo was on November 18, 2016 talking about her hair /threads/amberlynn-reid.23570/post-1886976

The first time she is directly referenced to looking like a sumo wrestler was on February 28, 2020 by ADHD /threads/amberlynn-reid.23570/post-6078253

The first time she is directly called sumo was February 26, 2023 by Xenomorph /threads/amberlynn-reid.23570/post-15130726
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Really? It feel way way earlier remember we were a whole subforum at one point. @ADHD is queen tho.
 
Narcissus has been staring at Lake Tiktok again.








Almost 1 year later she's finally moved on from that Sam Smith song 👏👏.

Eta Amber uploaded 4 hours ago but no one noticed or cared lol.

'weekly weigh in, talked to my dad for the first time in 7 years, & cute plus size outfit | vlog'
 
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Tinfoil theory :

She is moving to OKC with the intention of making her parent(s) her caregivers in exchange for a cut of the youtube money. She may even try to get them on camera to spice things up, be apart of the weight lost journey.

Hell, this could possibly change the entire DIRECTION of her channel; from weight loss to family reunion "situation type deal."

Think about it : all parties involved need a redemption arc. Amber's parents probably make less money then their tub of lard of a daughter does COMBINED but they seemed to gotten over their demons. At least potentially levelheaded enough to help Amber.

Amber is the immobile piggy bank that needs help, both physically and inspiration wise if she ever wants her channel to evolve beyond a freakshow

This all pie in the sky in the thinking here and I truly don't want to happen but this has norm fetish written all over it :

The biggest cunt on yt makes amends with the shit stains that made her.

TLC might even give them a show!

Then again The Reid family could just be even bigger group of lolcows then we thought.
 
The "call to her father" was a whole lot of nothing, as expected. She spent more time showing a shopping haul, bitching about her nail polish chipping, and sharing what DVDs she blew money on than discussing the call (that she took initiative to do).

You do see both Wasabi and Rarity in this vid. Wasabi looks pretty rough, poor thing.
 
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Atrax_Morgue_Dat_Pussy said:
but they seemed to gotten over their demons.
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I’m pretty sure Amber’s father was still drug addicted and homeless only a few months ago. That’s definitely not a sign of someone who seems to have “gotten over their demons”. Maybe somethings changed recently that I’m not aware of, but if I was a child of an addict I’d want see a lot more sobriety time before I trust that addict again. IIRC, OKC is also still a long way from where her mother lives.
 
Plot Summary with Commentary. Oh shit, the fake tears. Nope, we're not taking the ship within a LIGHT YEAR of this disaster. Long distance sensor sweep, DO IT!

Amber appears in what could be a bra... or pj? I don't know. Desperate behaviour is desperate.

Stuffy nose and scratchy throat from allergies. Blames her cats instead of the fact that her carpet looks like it hasn't been cleaned in 2 years.

Amber's nail polish looks like she put the tips of her fingers into a woodchipper.

JUMPCUT!! Amber's 'put herself together': black bra underneath a translucent white and gray horizontal striped sausage casing, all underneath a teal velvet monstrousity with spaghetti straps. She can't even blame it on dressing in the dark - she PLANNED this. I'm suddenly reminded of that Jeff Foxworthy joke "If you're wearing a blouse that's strapless, and a bra that isn't, you might be a redneck". The person he was referring to was still FAR MORE put together than Ambo.

She looks like the Beetlejuice sandworm.

JUMPCUT!! Walking Twinkie (1 of 3 pets accounted for), and we've returned to the scene of 'The Ankle-ing', so Amber can show us how massive the 2" divot at the side of the sidewalk really is.

JUMPCUT!! Insertion of a clip from 'yesterday' (whenever that was). It's a mini shopping haul of random shit, including Raid Light traps for 'gnats' (plug in nightlight thingies). Fun fact: to catch fleas, a trap can be made which involves placing a bowl with some water and dishsoap in front of a night light (they bounce around the light and get stuck in the water). But, no, I've got it wrong; this level of overkill is TOTALLY to catch fruit flies...

... oh, and she also got an entire rotisserie chicken and box of Stove Top stuffing. OMAD FOR THE WIN!

Back to the present (whenever that is)!

WEIGH IN: Monday September 4th 511.4lbs. Amber warns that weight loss from now on will be very slow (right after showing the entire chicken and box of stuffing - this bitch's timing is too good for this to be unintentional).

Amber blabs about her sleep schedule, which was supposedly fixed (yet somehow isn't).

WASABI SIGHTING! 2 of 3 pets accounted for. Amber thinks that he's old. Wasabi licks her hand (likely for the salt).

JUMPCUT!! Amber's 'crying'. She talked to her Dad on videochat. It's the first time she's talked to him in 7 years, and she hasn't seen him in person since she was 18. He was different now from how she remembered him to be and it was sureal- RARITY!!!! 3 of 3 pets accounted for!
BINGO!!!

Sorry, back to the bullshit about her dad.

It was really hard, because "he's not doing good", but she doesn't want to go into too much detail. Oh, you mean too much detail like telling your audience about how he would call you fat and slap you and spit on you, and encourage your brother to do the same? You mean too much detail like you telling us how all of the proceeds of his lawn mower repair shop would go to drugs or "scratch-off" tickets that would wallpaper his shop? You mean too much detail like you telling us how he stole a laptop from 'court'? You mean too much detail like how you told us he's been back and forth between jail and living on the streets during the entire duration of your channel? You mean too much detail like you told us how he recently lost a leg to diabetes?

You mean too much detail like how you told us he sent his friends to pick you up from school, and his friends would sexually assault you? No wait, that was your female cousin and you just BLAMED THEM .... NO WAIT!! And then it became his friends again!? Too much detail like that?

GO FUCK YOURSELF, AMBO, and stop using the misfortune of your family for ad revenue and sympathy clicks.

"I need a hug". You need a Klingon pain stick to the face.

PACKING UPDATE: Amber has two shopping bags full of DVDs that she wants to get rid of, so she's going to show you all of them because they are her favourites and she is "obsessed". Hahaha, Girl Interrupted. "It has a living room, and dining room, and an eat-in chicken". Actually, I kinda see some parallels between Ambo and Daisy. That's actually kinda disturbing...

JUMPCUT! It's the next day. She forgot to end the video. Blah blah blah. Give her a break; I mean, she hasn't even been doing this for 10 YEARS yet!

TL;DR: ALL 3 PETS ACCOUNTED FOR!! 511.4lbs. Amber dresses up as the Beetlejuice sandworm (unintenionally, apparently). Amber has no content, so she clickbaits airing her father's dirty laundry for ad revenue (but airs nothing). Amber buys RAID light traps for the 'gnats'. Amber shows a bunch a stupid bullshit and blabs at the camera to get her 8 minutes for mid-rolls. Amber prepares to chow down on a dainty meal of an entire rotisserie chicken and box of stuffing.


@bubble wrap, @PotatoSalad4711 : Thank you for explaining; that makes sense.

[Edited to Add:] Watching Ambo lipsyncing in those TikToks is like watching one of those old kung-fu movies with English dubbing.
 
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@Boolean Bitch thanks for another commentary.

Amber blathered so much about the Cetaphil (which my bored brain focused on when trying to recall what was in that miscellaneous haul) that I completely forgot about the rush-fully mentioned Raid. "Gnats," my ass. Amber definitely has bugs. The big fast winged kind.
 
Cock wombler said:
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How much body dismorphia do you need to delude yourself into believing you're sexy at 500lbs?
I film myself at my home gym on a rare occasion to check my form and struggle to show that to a best friend. Meanwhile this bitch slops down twice my TDEE in a single ubereats, takes her monthly shower, globs on some makeup, throws on a a top that's actually a 6XL dress, plops down in one of the few chairs capable of supporting her, and uploads 4 'thirst traps' to the world with no hesitation.
 
She's moveeeen! Did you know she's moveeeeen? Has she mentioned she's moveeeeen?
Who are you trying to convince Amber, us or yourself?
 
Cock wombler said:
Narcissus has been staring at Lake Tiktok again.
TheAmberlynnReid_7273937796371402015-no-watermark.mp4

TheAmberlynnReid_7275005703356566814-no-watermark.mp4

TheAmberlynnReid_7275088649199422750-no-watermark.mp4

TheAmberlynnReid_7275375528582958366-no-watermark.mp4

Almost 1 year later she's finally moved on from that Sam Smith song 👏👏.

Eta Amber uploaded 4 hours ago but no one noticed or cared lol.

'weekly weigh in, talked to my dad for the first time in 7 years, & cute plus size outfit | vlog'
https://youtube.com/watch?v=bhDqtkvJa9Y
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STFU fat fuck dont ruin Doja for anyone. She dont even know the words looks slow in the mind in this vid too looking like she chewing on some Delta 9s again
 
People on TikTok usually use filters to add to their plain faces to make them really ugly and the jump cut to beauty more surprising.

But Amber is 100% natural fugly, no filters needed.
 
I wonder if her Dad decided to contact her simply because of the lies? Why else would he bother? I don't think she understands she can't have it both ways.

She can't repeatedly accuse either parent of being the worst of the worst ('cos she's the victim of victims) and then brown nose them to such an extent that she pretends to cry because she loves them just SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much and they're so important to her, y'know despite the embellished bullshit she claims happened. Don't misunderstand me, her Mom is a dirty cunt and she was neglected by both of them, that much is true.

The only time it makes sense to defend/keep in touch with your abusive parent/s is if you have never really been without them. You don't know anything different, so of course it's difficult to pull away. That's not her situation though.

This bitch has happily spent years without contact but just so happens to have this unending love for the two people she said abused and neglected her suuuuper bad, again, because no-one was treated worse by their parents than Hamber. Victim of victims.

Yet she still wonders why people question her plot-hole filled traumatic backstory.

May have gotten a tad to irritated, it's the crying thumbnails that bring out the tophat. I mean come on. The tears mean jack shit.
 
bubble wrap said:
Those who are trying to anticipate ALR's move date may be making some incorrect assumptions, particularly for corporate owned properties like Amber's.
  • Leases can be offered in a range of durations for the renter to choose from. 5, 6, 7 8, 9, all the way up to 24 months. Generally the longer the lease, the lower the rent, except in cases where the lease would end in a part of the year when it's more difficult to find renters.
  • Leases don't always end at the end of the calendar month. It's usually based on the move in date. If you move in on the 9th of the month, the lease ends on the 8th of whatever month the lease ends. This is also true for month-to-month arrangements, which can start any day of the month. Some properties will allow you to stay an additional week or two, for prorated rent.
  • The notice requirement is 30 or 60 days. I've never heard of a property requiring 3 months notice. For month-to-month, there is no way they require more than a month's notice, since the reason people often choose that type of lease is because they aren't in a position to commit to anything longer.
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I think that it is impossible to know when she will be moving. With the pictures still on the wall, and her clothes in the closet, I expect that she is getting the mover to do all the packing since she has not done much. All she shows us is the place where the purses were. Movers tend to be cheaper mid-month, so the move could be today, tomorrow or in a few weeks. The packing will take 1-2 days, and and the move probably will take 2 days. Unpacking again will take 1-2 days. So, basically one week to go from Lexington the Oklahoma. It can be anytime now.
 
While Chantal is travelling in Thailand with Salad, Amberlynn is (imo) having to beg the ex and various long-lost relatives for help moving out of an apartment.
This amuses me a bit.
 
So everywhere I have lived I have had to give 90 days notice to break the lease without penalties except paying off the rest of the lease and they give us 60 days heads up before the lease expires to let us know to renew within 30 days or if we will not be welcome to renew the lease.

However those may just be the Tennant laws in my state 🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♀️
 
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