🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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lol cow supreme said:
She's 33 years old. She's been obese since she was probably 5. 28 years of being obese.
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Very true. I did not word that properly at all.

But fuck 350 at 15 is crazy. 70 pounds for every three years of her life.

I know it didn't work out this way but :

Age 3 - 70 lbs
Age 6 - 140 lbs
Age 9 - 210 lbs
Age 12 - 280 lbs
Age 15 - 350 lbs

The crazy thing is that she did admit to being 200 at the age of 11 so this not that a far off. Lets say she was 200 at 11 and 350 at 15, that means in four years she gained 140 pounds. That's 3 pounds a month for four years straight while having the metabolism of a preteen.

Fuck Amber but JFC her parent's are truly scum.
 
Jesus fuck her face is back to full moon 572.4 status.

I wanna see the handwriting of this "friend". Either she paid the uber eats guy extra to write things while she inhaled the Mcdonalds OR she just wrote them herself the way she always does because literally no one cares enough. Why would this friend who doesn't know jack shit about her choose a Destiny question?
 
Let's take a moment to talk about this cringy and ugly ass thumbnail. What a face.

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Amber Lynn Reid BREAKS UP with Jade/Wifey, My Girlfriend.

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*Insert whale songs*


Edit to add a few highlights:

  • I dont know if i'm going to regret this but
  • Faline and I have broken up
  • It was mutual
  • Wearing the same thing she wore yesterday, cried off all her makeup. Cant stop crying.
  • Mourning a death
  • Knowing that ONE DAY she's going to wake up and she's not there (but she's still there, are you forcing her to sleep with you still? gross)
  • But she envisioned her whole future with her, and she did the same. but this was mutual.
  • There have been some things that have been just like ..... (like the polyamoury and her fucking other, attractive, fuckable people?)
  • Sometimes love just isnt enough (enough for what? to keep wiping your stank ass?)
  • Just needs to be single
  • This happened literally before fireworks last night (July 4?)
  • There will be people questioning and saying you seemed so happy and this has been the most passionate relationship i've been in on BOTH SIDES (all this passion! But love wasnt enough.. for what again? Love and passion. what could have been missing? Lah)
  • Will be moving. Faline will help me. She will be moving. we have a timeline. (She mentioned in the cards in a box QA that a MALE FRIEND came over and put together for her...that maybe she'd do an appartment tour before the move. so the breakup and the move were already planned and decided before the QA... all of this is PERFORMATIVE. It does explain why she looked like particular absolute shit in that video. And didnt someone make a comment about the male friend fucking Jade? Nailed it.)
  • I just look around at everything and (all the black naked lesbian decorations?)
  • Not everything is perfect behind the scenes(Chantal BEHIND THE SCENESE GUISE!)

Ok This is as far as I can get. This performative video is absolutely pathetic. God bless your gorls on a proper recap. I dont have the liquor or the liver capacity today.
 
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MMW: This is so close to the "why I'm not getting WLS/ I just don't feel good about it" for it to just be random coincidence.

Also: Jade broke up with her before fireworks on the 4th but it was a "mutual decision" and she will not be discussing any further details. She's been cryeeeeen all day, called methmomma cause she has no friends to talk to other than Jade, doesn't like being in Kentucky, says it's "not for her", but that she'll be living alone now (which is the first time you can see a real flicker of panic from Fat Al).
 
It's All So Tiresome said:
This is a wonderful development. I am personally thrilled at the prospect of a new caretaker that will be willing to be on camera so they can finger paint together.
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I'm thrilled at the prospect of several vlogs where Amber starts raging about what a piece of shit Jade really was as soon as she's secured a brand new asswiper (just like she's done for every single other girlfriend who dumped her).
 
Ooooo. Chile. I didn't think it would happen so soon. She needs to get a big bottle of cheap wine and compose a poeem, like she did for Destiny.

I do give Jade credit for keeping everything but her hand off camera for so long. And I would like to see an Amberlynn single arc, because she's housebound and has become estranged from everyone in her inner circle since she's been on YT: Destiny, Dana, Becky, Ricky, Eric, Hannah and Rafe(?).

But, alas, the next caretaker is probably already in sight.
 
We all knew it was always around the corner and we are finally here. Despite her saying it was "mutual" its pretty obvious Amber was cherry bombed since she does not have another caretaker prepped and ready to go to take her place.

Shes for sure gonna balloon even more this summer and I for one, love that for her.

Amber also shouldnt be too sad that shes alone, her next bout of cellulitis is certain to be popping in pretty fucking soon all things considered.
 
Tinfoil hat : They didn't break up. This is a way for Wipey to leave the Amberverse / clickbait.

Now for this to be true Amber would have had to put on a pretty good act. It seemed sincere that's why I doubt it but maybe?

I guess time will tell; if she manages to keep herself somewhat clean than I could see Wipey still coming by to wash her off every now and then.
 
Guess there are limits to even what a gold NIGGER can take, lmao. She's a lah, but I don't think she's smart or talented enough to fake distress and panic like this. I hope I'm not wrong, I can't stand this wipey arc- since its inception, we've lost every side character including butlers, the subforum had to be collapsed, and we were reduced to talking about some retard frog's video for like 3 pages. This has to end, we have been patient and we deserve the lonely hermit rage arc.
 
Shocking. A 27 year old able bodied polyamorous woman doesn't want to be chained to a 550 pound albatross for the rest of her life. Shocking.

Shoulda gotten that WLS, fatty.
 
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