🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

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Jade Francis, Alex, Wifey, My Gorlfriend, Faleen's New Tattoo. Appearantly its alos going to have someone with "hear no evil" and cerburus.
The art itself is good.. but the content and context is fucking cringe.

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PS. The before shot. Jade is fucking FAT

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I've got to edit it again.. It sounds like a "voiceover" of Amber going "ooh this place looks so sterile and professional" while it pans around what looks like someones spare 1/2 bathroom with the toilet ripped out. There is trash on the floor. The equipment is in a HarborFreight rolling tool cart (as cheap as they come) and above it are some ikea shelves.
This is someones house at BEST.

https://youtu.be/gQNtQ1ah32M?t=107

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Trash on the floor
Drinking cup on the wash sink
Open trash can from target, didnt even take the lable off
Shitty home office chair that cannot be properly sterilized..and is that cum on the seat?
Open bottles of "sterile water" or alchohol wash.

Bottom tier rolling cart/tool box
Terrible ikea floating home shelves

I fail to see any sterility or professionalism in this home butcher shop. I bet they offer weekly specials to cut off your balls on "Trans Tuesday".

And if this is the tatoo chair/bed... How the fuck do did you do the left arm while its against the wall? do you have to rearranged the entire room?
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I call shenanigans said:
To be fair the fat in Caesar salad should be satiating in itself, plus there’s protein in the eggs, the Parmesan cheese, bacon (if it’s in there), and the anchovies in the dressing. I don’t understand why she wouldn’t add a chicken breast to it though, given it’s a pretty natural pairing and Faline was having it.
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My grocer sells a healthier version of a Caesar salad with a low-fat dressing and seeds instead of croutons, but it is really not the point. I would consider a Ceasar salad only part of a balanced meal and not a meal by itself. A salad kit is about 4 portions; enough to be satisfying without bringing the extra calories. However, Amber is not on a diet and is not doing any of the dietician's recommendations. All she thinks to know is that she needs to complete 12 sessions with the psychotherapist and then she will be approved for surgery.

Mekahineyho said:
Maybe it’s just my experience, but anytime I’ve gone to a private tattoo space like that they ask for no guests. I wouldn’t be surprised it Jade was shitty enough to just show up with Amber plus she would not sit at home for 8 hrs while Jade is out interacting with others.
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Miltank said:
i mean she most likely stayed home, no way would she want to sit there for 8 hrs in a tattoo parlor (which are usually on the smaller side and not buffalo-size friendly) plus that's 8 hours of being in a public place where she'd be seen. the half second of the parlor room could easily be a quick vid by Jade that Amber put in to "prove" she was there
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I think Amber going to the tattoo parlour for 8 hours is rubbish. Amber without food for 8 hours? No, it did not happen. Didn't Jade develop a keloid on one of her tattoos? She should know better, but she is with Amber, so.

Situation Type Deal Gorl said:
Taking a pass on this one. Same boring shit, rehashing cakegate and her muh PTSD that she was "diagnosed" with, even though she wasn't. Stupid acting like a five year old at a home goods store, and eating salad without any protein in it, which means she'll be hungry ten minutes after she eats it. I don't really care about tats, although I'll say that was some nice looking art. The reasoning behind it, mixing religion, art, and mythology - it works.
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For many years, Amber told us that she could not lose weight because she had BED. Now, she is cured because she would not be approved for surgery. If the psychologist tells Amber that he would not recommend the surgery due to PTSD, how long before it is also mysteriously cured?
 
@Friend of Dorothy Parker..." not every Black person speaks/would prefer to speak at all times in ways most white people don't/can't follow..."
What exactly are you trying to say? Most White people understand English in the United States, no matter who's speaking it.
 
@Turd Fergusson

I would like to see the result of her being denied due to her tasty PTSD ''diagnosis''. I could see her launching into a tirade about how dehumanizing it is and how attacked she feels. It'd all be down to the heartless professionals ruining her life.

I genuinely don't know if she'd try and take the PTSD shit back because it's one of the best excuses for her to throw around. BED was beneficial at times but PTSD is on another level entirely. It's too valuable for her to give up.

Maybe. I don't know. She's a fat dipshit.
 
I have a hard time believing Hamberlynn sat in the tattoo parlour for 8 hours, maybe in the car, but no way she went in and sat in several uncomfortable chairs. This is the same gorl that couldn't sit in an office chair at a desk job because it "hurt her back", the same gorl that would get upset because the waiting room of one of her multiple shopped doctors didn't have armless chairs, same gorl that had to sit in the backseat of Becky's Hyundai or with the front passenger seat fully reclined because she didn't fit. I don't think she went with Wipey, I think she had Wipey get the content for her so she could pretend she was there for something cool and out living her best life, not bedbound. Remember, Becky got a few tattoos and I don't think Hamber was there for those either and those were little tattoos that wouldn't have taken long at all.
 
TaterBot said:
@Friend of Dorothy Parker..." not every Black person speaks/would prefer to speak at all times in ways most white people don't/can't follow..."
What exactly are you trying to say? Most White people understand English in the United States, no matter who's speaking it.
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Tell me you have no Black friends without telling me.... Your implication (about what you think I meant) is incorrect. I'll leave it there. But for the avoidance of doubt, I'll reiterate: I was not saying that anyone's dialect/how many people speak with their in-group is not English. And frankly, I don't see how you could have drawn that conclusion if you read my comment in full.
 
Xenomorph said:
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RE: Shoes and feet.

That's a damn given. Remember one of the older vids when she said she slid her Wommart Made in China flats off and the bottoms of her feet were (SQUICK) "baby soft"?

Her feet are deformed.
They're flat/blown out
She never wears socks
And if she did, them socks would be black
She doesn't shower
She doesn't bathe
Who is Mr. Soap?
Who even is Mr. Scalding hot water?
We all know she can't reach her feet
So she's never washed the soles or between the toes

I am telling you. The paint bubbles off the walls and the wallpapered parts slide a little further down each time she takes them shoes off.

We don't need to get into her Yurts panties or brawls she probably wears for days on end.
 
I can't even imagine what my artist would do if I showed up for a big piece with a 500 pound toddler in tow. Every studio I've been to gently discourages bringing people because they're distractions,

lol cow supreme said:
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Trash on the floor
Drinking cup on the wash sink
Open trash can from target, didnt even take the lable off
Shitty home office chair that cannot be properly sterilized..and is that cum on the seat?
Open bottles of "sterile water" or alchohol wash.
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It reminds me of those retards on tik tok that buy a $40 machine off amazon and tattoo people on their beds. Nothing is wrapped or protected. I guess germs are whatever.
 
Cornfed said:
I know what the bullet journal reminds me of.
There was a British sci fi comedy called Red Dwarf, and in the book adaptation of the show the character of Rimmer neuroticly makes study timetables of massive complexity to subconsciously avoid doing any actual studying.
These bullet journals are exactly those timetables, and the mentality is exactly the same.
Since this is the Hamber thread, and book time is topical I highly recommend Red Dwarf to everyone here (the book at least. The show is only good for the first 3 or 4 seasons).
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All a little off topic but I’d rather sperg about Red Dwarf than Amber today.
Sorry, I know this is a bit late. I’m playing catch-up this week but thanks for making me laugh thinking of this.
The writer of Red Dwarf understood people and he gave Rimmer some real Amberisms. The chapter describing Rimmer meting out time to create his beautiful, artistic revision schedule, spending weeks too long on it, then having to totally revise it in order to condense the study into the time he had left was very Amber. The creation of the timetable was just as important as getting the work done and gave him a sense of achievement, the same way Amber loves to make lists….rather than DO anything that’s on the list.
If anyone wants to listen to the relevant clip, it’s here. If you like that kind of British humour, Red Dwarf is a classic.

The clip ends with Rimmer fully prepared for his exam (having done zero research, made a million shorter and shorter timetables, given up and gone to bed.
After the clip cuts.
As a precaution against his 12th fail, he decides to write all his notes in tiny biro writing on his hands, arms and thighs. As soon as the test begins he starts to sweat profusely, making the whole thing unreadable. That is when he loses his mind in a quiet way. He takes his right hand (covered in smudged astrophysical equations) lands it flatly on the blank exam paper….leaving a smudged hand print with some vague backwards writing….a mess. Shuts his paper. Gives a full military salute to the presiding examiner. And faints on the floor.


Not relevant to Amber, but this thread needs some life put back into it. I can’t think of anything better than Red Dwarf clips.
 
Mekahineyho said:
I’ve never understood why a group home would have a traveling soccer team. Do they play against other group homes? How would a 300lb little girl even succeed in soccer in any way?
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It's so funny how hard she clings to the child sports prodigy lie. If she did participate in any of these activities, she likely received a participation medal at the end of the season just like every other kid on the park district rec team.

The way she "subtly" slips in those details about how sooper sad 😭 it was in foster care whenever she's challenged about anything is just so perfectly Amber.

VirginMary said:
seems to have genuine relationships to family/friends/partner
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Are we talking about the same Destiny? She gets "engaged" to every refrigerator shaped woman who crosses her path? That Destiny?
 
Amberlynn does not have severe PTSD as she claims. She uses her rocky childhood as a shield to enable her bad behavior or manipulate others. Rough, past memories are not meant to be wallowed in like a pig enjoying the mud. Initially you are supposed to recall them, analyze them, and move forward. You have to learn to handle those memories popping up at random times and eventually they stop becoming a frequent nuisance. I don't think she is paying attention in therapy or telling the truth about it.

Big AL enjoys the attention and quirkyness that telling people about her mentalz brings. Her goal, nearly every video, is to build upon her sob story with lies.

Jade seems like a bitchy, rude, tacky, and smartass person; Amberlynn absorbing more of these traits confirms it for me, if the past relationships is any indication. The tattoos she got are rather tasteless and negative.

I've noticed a few people are curious about Jade's voice and attitude. I don't think it is code switching. Black folks in the South and West Coast aren't the same as this uppity nigress yank. New York African Americans are culturally different than other Blacks. Jade personifies many of the negative traits and stereotypes that comes from her particular demographic.
 
StyrofoamFridge said:
I've noticed a few people are curious about Jade's voice and attitude.
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Please PM me when Jade gets Hamber's name ttttiiiy-toooed anywhere on her body.


THAT is commitment. Almost did it in the military, until she said uhhhh, don't do that, I'm fucking somebody else. Thanks, Christine, for being honest.
 
Slappy McGherkin said:
Please PM me when Jade gets Hamber's name ttttiiiy-toooed anywhere on her body.


THAT is commitment. Almost did it in the military, until she said uhhhh, don't do that, I'm fucking somebody else. Thanks, Christine, for being honest.
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I have to deal with junior Marines doing this more often than one would think.
At least you didn't get the whores name on your body and have to pay way more to remove it, or alter it.
 
At least my Sailors were too high on the 'nerdy autist' scale to ever get laid, much less be driven to get tattoos of names on their bodies. They were the 'prison tat' and 'generic skull-sleeves' dorks. On topic, I wanna see some fuckin' commitment, F/JFoNY:MGF,W. Get your hog's face on your body. Goodness knows you've got enough flabby skin for it, given how rotund you are. And you found a decent artist. I'm certain the tattooist will capture that moon face perfectly.
 
Diet Coke 4 Life said:
At least my Sailors were too high on the 'nerdy autist' scale to ever get laid, much less be driven to get tattoos of names on their bodies. They were the 'prison tat' and 'generic skull-sleeves' dorks. On topic, I wanna see some fuckin' commitment, F/JFoNY:MGF,W. Get your hog's face on your body. Goodness knows you've got enough flabby skin for it, given how rotund you are. And you found a decent artist. I'm certain the tattooist will capture that moon face perfectly.
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If Egg Gorl's significant other can commit, so can Wipey....
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jjgyme said:
the "test" amber is saying she passed with flying colors is the pcl-5 and it's self reporting and prone to malingers often over reporting, as you've all correctly deduced of miss MUH TRAUMA!! it's virtually useless by itself. the next step should be a CAPS-5 which is a clinician given screening and much more in-depth. it'll ask about symptoms, what triggers them, dissociating, etc. that's where any clinician worth their salt will be able to smell her bullshit from a mile away.
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I’m gonna go ahead and power level here cause I’m fixing to get ALL the top hats any damn way. Might as well go do a two fer. This is the one thing about Hambeast that truly, honestly pisses me off. Fuck her lying about Wipey and all that other shit she lies about. This is the lie that makes me feel the only real rage, the only time I truly want to throat punch the cunt (besides when she says melk).
I was stalked by an ex , kidnapped at gunpoint and held hostage by him. For almost two years. Tons of fun shit happened. And it took me three months of talking to a psychologist and her actually visually seeing me go through a “unaware of what the fuck I’m doing phase “ of booby trapping a shelter and having no clue I was doing it for her to give me the diagnosis of cptsd. Intensive damn therapy. Then I was immediately medicated and started EMDR therapy. It sucked ass All of it sucks ass. It’s not fun. It’s not cute. It’s not corky. It’s also not a fucking get out of jail free card. Anxiety attacks do not consist of sniffing and doing your damndest to eek out just one real tear and softly proclaiming “oh, you guys heard that “. When she throws out the words “stalking and harassing “ referring to the haydurs….people who disagree with her on a goddamn PUBLIC platform are stalking and harassing her. …. I truly wish she would get an actual stalker. One she REALLY has to worry about. Like, oh a 1%er. See how that really changes her fucking fat smothered brain pan about the true definition of stalking. For these reasons alone, I’m just gleefully awaiting mother karma catching up to this bitch and I pray the resulting fireworks 🎆 will be worth the time of my life I’ve wasted in this particular fatty.
 
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