🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[Witch Bitch]

I will never ever stop being fascinated at how these completely unsexual, unattractive misshapen masses get into relationships so fast and get engaged even faster. What is it about them that's making them afraid to spend even a few months single? What's with the people around them who consider them prospects? These people are living in some alternate reality. They're like animals on a farm or some shit.

U-Haul Lesbian Culture

 

[Slappy McGherkin]

What is it about them that's making them afraid to spend even a few months single?

Desperation, my fren. Desperation.

All of them. They need constant reassurance that they're not a freak show. Hamber can't kick one out the door without having another already lined up to jump in the "caretaker" shitskin.

Do I care? Naah, not an iota. Relationships that these fuckwaffles have are totally transient to begin with. They don't have a house, they don't have children (other than some pets to fight over when they part ways), but bottom line is... there is no real meaning financially, family, that old fucks like me have worked YEARS on to put stakes in the ground and build a relationship.

Good for the Sped Dusty. If she's happy, good for her. Check in with ol' Slappy here 6 months from now when the novelty of Petunia BigTits has worn off and she's back on the hunt.

Troof.

 

[Antiks]

I will never ever stop being fascinated at how these completely unsexual, unattractive misshapen masses get into relationships so fast and get engaged even faster. What is it about them that's making them afraid to spend even a few months single? What's with the people around them who consider them prospects? These people are living in some alternate reality. They're like animals on a farm or some shit.

These lard slurping wobbling lumps have similar characteristics to that of children in kindergarten. They play dress up, like holding balloons and when they're super excited about their new fwend they have pretend weddings just like real Mummies and Daddies do.

Except in the world of deathfats they're obese adult dykes shrieking with joy as they ram cheap tacky rings onto each others bloated fingers in a state of puddled mania. Thirsty for smug validation they then turn to social media to upload idiotic photos of their fat hands in a greasy embrace knowing full well that every other deathfat on the planet will be seething with spiteful jelousy. After the ceremony at Arby's they consummate their marriage by slapping their fupas together for 15 seconds until they start wheezing, run out of breath and cry tears of confused joy.

Three weeks later they then file for divorce because the dopamine has long worn off.

Stupid fat fucks.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

How?

How is it that Hamber manages to find these programs and shrinks who "don't accept insurance, so it's gonna be pricey, folks! Gonna be pricey!"? One? Okay, sure, maybe some weird as fuck HAES thing she wants us to believe she went to may not, even though that's stupid and makes no sense. But another? Coupled with a WLS place that doesn't take insurance because "insurance doesn't pay for WLS in KY." (which is wrong and a lie, shocker)? Are you not the same person who has claimed to be in therapy for the past year, paying out of pocket for it while also buying grocery and takeout bills of 3K a month, plus buying all the dreadfully schlocky crap and books you'll never read that you buy?

Seriously, Hamber, if you're going to try to fake up bullshit stories to keep your channel alive, at least do so convincingly. The fact that you, with your self-proclaimed MENSA brain, cannot would be bewildering if we didn't know your already undersized at birth brain wasn't being slowly eaten by the mound of fat that is the rest of you, making your claims of being a genius also bullshit.

All that beetus-induced acanthosis nigricans is progressing nicely. Especially around the eyes. Keep it up! That raccoon look will no doubt be in fashion real soon now.

The rest is just her talking over and over and over about therapy while saying nothing at all. Doesn't matter. it's the same thing we've all heard before. She also talks about her makeup and says probably half her shit is expired but she doesn't care, she's using it anyway. Including an ink "crahn", which I suppose should be crayon, although I have no idea at all wtf it's used for because I was not paying attention to all the makeup stuff.

At the end, her eyebrows are so fucking dark and the rest of her makeup so thick, it looked like theatrical makeup.

That's it! The video abruptly ends with a card that says "to be continued".

MinimalEffortLynn at her boring finest.

 

[high and tired]

Dusty proposed to a Dana lookalike with bigger tits lmao

 

[Xenomorph]

Its the EXACT same RING

 

[maybe a pigeon]

Yes, it is. And the picture of Dusty holding Amber's fat hand is almost identical to the picture of her holding Landwhale's Lexus's fat hand. She has to be trolling Amber. I mean, fine, maybe they're actually engaged. But that's like a shot-for-shot remake of the original movie.

[Makeup sperging: Amber used brow setting gel first, and then went in with brow color. That is like using makeup finishing spray and then putting on foundation. Whatever you're using to set with goes last. Jesus, she is stupid. Then again, she is famous for using hair conditioner on her face. Rain and petals eavesdrop, she used the wrong makeup.]

 

[Xenomorph]

Spoiler: Vintage Dusty and her Ex

This whale wass the chick Disty cheated on with Amber the one in the bedsheet.

I did not manipulate these pics lmao these are real af from her insta.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

Goddamn, what is the deal with her chin? Is that just what excess fat on a bony protrusion looks like when you pull at the skin containing it? Peter Griffin Butt chin to cratered surface of the moon chin in one go.

 

[high and tired]

Destiny was beaten with the uggo stick because I remember her younger sister being pretty

 

[Antiks]

View attachment 4914801

Christ almighty, she looks like a bloated corpse at this point. The only give-away that she's alive are those glassy, miserable eyes that are about to burst into tears because Jade Francis (her fat house-negro) clearly hasn't been putting up with Big Al's bullshit recently. And if Hamber is told "NO" by anyone her mentulz suffer greatly because she's a horribly entitled nasty cunt of a woman.

The black beetus rings around her eyes gave me a good belly laugh coz although she has 36 other self-diagnosed disorders and ailments she "definitely doesn't have die-beetus you guise!"

As for that ridiculous pouting turned-down mouth, it looks like something you'd see on a retarded French Bulldog that's been chewing on a wasp.

Such a ridiculous fat fuck.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

As for that ridiculous pouting turned-down mouth, it looks like something you'd see on a retarded French Bulldog that's been chewing on a wasp.

If Hamber was serious about being a writer, she could do worse than just studying writing samples by posters to this very thread.

 

[Constellationzero]

Goddamn, what is the deal with her chin? Is that just what excess fat on a bony protrusion looks like when you pull at the skin containing it? Peter Griffin Butt chin to cratered surface of the moon chin in one go.

Lotta blackheads on that chin. Use a Biore strip and I bet it looks like a dense, dark forest when it's pulled off.

 

[Antiks]

If Hamber was serious about being a writer, she could do worse than just studying writing samples by posters to this very thread.

Kiwifarms is far too advanced regarding creative writing for Big al to wrap her bloated, empty head around.

Only the cream of the crop can handle such high class literature displayed here at the milking stations. That's why spiteful, knuckle-dragging moral warriors are constantly trying to shut these forums down. They feel threatened by the beautifully descriptive language expressed regarding their shitty existences.

 

[I call shenanigans]

Anyone else notice that her 12 therapy sessions is now 12 “successful “ therapy sessions. I guess the Tammy Slaton “I’m not talking about that” isn't going to count for her. Mind you, I can’t imagine Amber not discussing all of her victimhood at great length. Whether she bothers doing her therapy session homework though is a totally different kettle of fish.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

MommaGoob went through (some of) the work to figure out Hamber's supposed shrink situation.

BTW for MG, Hamber herself said that same shrink out in Podunkville (that she was supposedly seeing for four years by that point) who gave her the dx of bipolar after one session ALSO gave her a dx of depression at that very same session. When people who knew said one, it isn't possible to give a dx of bipolar in an hour (and Hamber not knowing which variety of muh bipolar it was suspect), and two, depression is not a comorbidity when a dx of bipolar is given, Hamber changed her story to the clip you showed. You have to go back further to the origin story of her collection of muh mentalz at the gaycare.

 

[Mekahineyho]

Spoiler: Vintage Dusty and her Ex

View attachment 4914654 View attachment 4914662
View attachment 4914785 This whale wass the chick Disty cheated on with Amber the one in the bedsheet.

I did not manipulate these pics lmao these are real af from her insta.

I’m dying at the 2nd senior photo. Why does the last one look identical to Dana?

I think she deleted all her pics of amber off her IG, but I noticed she always posts pics of her GFS with some country love song lyrics in the caption and she never did that on ambers pics lol.

Edit: sorry if I’m late to this, but I just rechecked her cameo page and it’s $50 now. Wasn’t it 30? So you can pay 50 bucks to have her mispronounce your common name,talk about herself and have her disdain for you as a peasant viewer ooze from her entire body.

 

[CloverKitty]

I will never, ever stop being fascinated at how these completely unsexual, unattractive misshapen masses get into relationships so fast and get engaged even faster. What is it about them that's making them afraid to spend even a few months single? What's with the people around them who consider them prospects? These people are living in some alternate reality. They're like animals on a farm or some shit.

Right? On that note, I just love when FB, ALR, or any other Hamplanet cow blubbers about how evil and bigoted we are for (rightfully) assuming anyone who would shack up with them has a feeder fetish..
Uh, last I checked, it’s not really off-base to assume anyone who’s attracted with you has something pathologically wrong with them, not because of your lazy, reductive “fAtPhObIa” attribution, but because you have eaten yourself into a deformed state, thereby precluding yourself as the recipient of most (if not all) conventional, non-fetishistic physical attraction, you fat fucking idiot.
Like, I’ve even seen 300lb ( hell maybe even heavier) women that, while they certainly aren’t healthy or attractive looking, they at least still have the tiniest bit of feminine curvature under their fatsuit of blubber. And have proportionately large boobs, ass, etc. Big Al, however, is about 200lbs away from having a vaguely feminine form.
She loves to refer to her disgusting chunk of back fat as her “caboose”, but she actually has a small, flat, “W” shaped Hank Hill ass, and it’s only about half as wide as that roll she wants us to believe is her ass, if that. I know, I know- most of us already have speculated/more or less deduced this about her anatomy, but my autism and fatphobia and I set out to prove it once and for all- I took a screenshot of her, and turned up the contrast so I could illustrate it. I’ll take my puzzle pieces, and possible top hats haha, it beats me why this retarded hamplanets body parts are beyond unattractive, into the realm of downright offensive to me…But I know I’m far from alone in these feelings

 

[notfoodienotbeauty]

Amber will never have a female shape. She ruined her body. She could lose 500 pounds and she will still be disgusting with loose skin hanging everywhere.

 

[Slappy McGherkin]

Okay, that was autistic as hell. Thank-you for the dissertation on Hamber's ass. If you had to see it.... well.....