🍗 Deathfat Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
KaeRants uploaded a pretty good video of Fat AL and her creepy interactions with Libby. I know this is ancient news in the amberverse and I knew about her being creepy around Libby but I didn’t know about that whole thing with the random guy who approached them at a restaurant. Jfc I knew AL and Dusty were always a pair of retards with arrested development and that’s why they liked hanging out with a teenager but my god, those clips with that dude made me sick. Thank fucking god Libby didn’t end up getting violated or worse.

Where the absolute fuck were her parents even? I have nieces who are that age and there’s no fucking way I would let them hang out with adult women all the time, let alone “adult” women like Fat AL and Dusty.
 
How are scratch offs redeemed? Because it would be funny if it ends up being too onerous for Amber to go through and this 'gift that keeps on giving' is really low dollar winners stacking up while Amber pulls fresh cash out of her bra or the binder or wherever she keeps it.
 
How are scratch offs redeemed? Because it would be funny if it ends up being too onerous for Amber to go through and this 'gift that keeps on giving' is really low dollar winners stacking up while Amber pulls fresh cash out of her bra or the binder or wherever she keeps it.
There's a bar code on the back that the cashier scans and they pay you from the register unless you win over x amount of money and then if it's a lot, you have to mail the ticket in to an address on the back. SO Jade - I mean Wifey - I mean Feline - can just walk them into whatever store she bought them from but she'd never make the effort to mail a ticket in if she won a significant amount of money.
 
she'd never make the effort to mail a ticket in if she won a significant amount of money.
Oh, so like the time she won $2,000 from the car dealership mailer.

This advice column story is fun, imagine:

Dearlynn,

I love my fiancee a lot and we have sex 10 times a week. I finish every time and she's very understanding of the way my chest lymphodema suffocates me in the afterglow, and doesn't mind having to reach completion on her own. We've lived together for 34 months of our 35 month relationship, and my fiancee knows that since I don't like anything she likes, it can't be out in the living area. All of her tapestries, band posters, cartoons and Kate Winslet shit - basically anything specific to her has to go in her closet (not my closet, or my other closet). THE PROBLEM IS: she's been starting a lot of arguments lately about hanging some of her family portraits up on the walls. IN THE BEDROOM. OR THE LIVING ROOM. She says she wants to see them especially since her mom just died, but I was raised in foster care actually and I feel like it really takes the attention off the situation type deal I have with my mother, and I really need help getting her to see why she just needs to be here for me right now.

Sincerely,
Keep it in the Closet
(P.S. I pay for everything)
 
ALRhoof.jpg


That, my friends, is a hand.
I think I've seen that hand on someone else before.

1671183670621.png
 
How exactly does one go through a “reading slump”? You either fucking read or you don’t. It’s not like she’s sitting here with a yellow highlighter and attempting to ingest Dante’s inferno or some shit, she supposedly reads for fun. If you read for fun, you read when you have the free time because you want to. Jesus wept she needs a fucking tard wrangler for reals.
 
How exactly does one go through a “reading slump”? You either fucking read or you don’t. It’s not like she’s sitting here with a yellow highlighter and attempting to ingest Dante’s inferno or some shit, she supposedly reads for fun. If you read for fun, you read when you have the free time because you want to. Jesus wept she needs a fucking tard wrangler for reals.
She’s too fucking stupid to realize she just doesn’t like the content. The book is boring but she can’t comprehend that so it has to be her reading skills.
 
You know her mobility is going when she has to hang on to the counter whenever she’s standing still. She doesn’t put anything in her bottom drawers since she can reach them properly.
The amount of over consumerism is astronomical with those two. So much waste. But Amber doesn’t just work to pay bills right!!
654228C8-BD5E-416E-93E5-781B6B75F8F9.jpeg
 
Last edited by a moderator:
You know her mobility is going when she has to hang on to the counter whenever she’s standing still. She doesn’t put anything in her bottom drawers since she can reach them properly.
The amount of over consumerism is astronomical with those two. So much waste. But Amber doesn’t just work to pay bills right!!
Every single freeze frame of hers just screams pain and misery.
 
Why does she still bother with the ''I'm dealing with health issues but I don't want to talk about'' bollocks. Either she thinks it will get her more angry interactions in the comments or she stupidly believes people will actually worry about her.

Even when she's dying, the only pleasant comments she'd receive would be holier-than-thou haters (including the commentary channels) claiming they just wanted the best for her and how heartbroken they are. Nobody will ever truly give a shit about her health. Nobody. I wonder if she'll ever come to terms with that or just waste away her delusional hovel.

Y'know even as adults, if someone in my family ate like that (sticking her tongue out before her food reaches her mouth) they'd get bollocked for it. Jade, teach your piggy to show some basic manners you useless bellend.

Your hair has never been curly natural. I guess she stopped curling it because it takes too much effort. Easiest to quit and claim it was temporary.

How many videos is she going to push out showing her buying shit, organising shit, throwing shit away and forcing shit on Goodwill?

That ''babygirl'' necklace tickles me. Ridiculous.
 
So my girlfriend works at the local Goodwill and she told me they wouldn’t be able to sell those little mini brand things. They’re too tiny and loose. She said they’d take them and just toss them once she left.

So Amber isn’t helping anyone by donating. Just skip the trip and bin them yourself.
 
So, in the last three months, she was on Ozempic then quit, started to count calories then quit, so she went on keto then quit, then move to intuitive eating then quit, and finally she was back to WW and has now quit, to be on intuitive eating. She went from 450 pounds at the end of the Ozempic era to now 520ish pounds. This is quite impressive. Can you imagine how much she would weigh now if she was not doing any diets? Probably the same. Saying that you are on diet does not mean that you are doing the diet, as Amber is showing us. What happened to the 100 days of weighing list?

So my girlfriend works at the local Goodwill and she told me they wouldn’t be able to sell those little mini brand things. They’re too tiny and loose. She said they’d take them and just toss them once she left.
I have a great deal of respect for shops like Goodwill and other charity shops. They help people who cannot afford to shop on the high street and it reduces the binning of perfectly good clothing and other goods. (Damn you Primark).

Amber has no concept of what poor people need and uses those shops as waste disposal.
 
...
Y'know even as adults, if someone in my family ate like that (sticking her tongue out before her food reaches her mouth) they'd get bollocked for it. Jade, teach your piggy to show some basic manners you useless bellend.
...
You know, this is one of the things where I'd get physically violent with her over. There's absolutely no reason for this 600 lb toddler to keep showing her tongue every chance she gets while eye fucking herself in the viewfinder. This is not even about manners at this point, there's just something wrong there that my lizard brain wants to auto-correct through force.
 
Amber is so extremely boring and stagnant, I honestly don't know why I always come back, it feels like I developed Stockholm's syndrome or something. The kiwis breathing life to this thread are way more entertaining than the cow herself. Kudos to everybody.
 
She's been doing the fatchested phone holder thing for quite a while. Since back in the Becky hauling her around in the Hyundai days. I think now it's become its permanent home rather than an occasional one.
Well, think about it... Her shirtdresses don't have pockets.
Her perpetual black leggings don't have pockets.
Where else is she going to put it?
On the shelf?

🤮
 
Maybe Amber is having trouble reading the books because she realized they weren't written by Virginia Andrews but by Andrew Neiderman. Her lil' lezbeen brain just won't let her.
Speaking of, I wonder if someone as dumb as Amber with no father figure were to read VC Andrews books at an impressionable age, if it would heavily color their perception of men.
I mean, if I believed that a man couldn't tell his granddaughter from his wife just because she dyed her hair? I would avoid them too.

How is Amber getting over 40,000 views on her videos? Are that many people into ageplay porn?
 
That B necklace is ugly and her neck tried tried to pull it into the folds to make it disappear. Can't wait for the green neck molment.
Why buy caffeine free diet pepsi? Is she really that against drinking water that she'd rather drink colored cancer water?
Of course her new book choice is another YA whine fest about some outcast's journey. 32 going on 12.
She just "forgot" she had lipstick all over her moon face. She really thinks people care about her try hard we have sex bullshit
She's been doing this for 10 years and still can't do basic edits. It's really special.

Amber has also built a universe, a reality, where she was the best dancer in the school, winning countless prizes. She was also a soccer player, a writer and an artist. She was the most popular kid in school. I do not know many women in their 30s who keep harping on how great they were in high school. Most of them are doing it because they have a wretched present life.
Along the same lines of 30 year old guys who always talk about high school football. What's wild to me is that her stories are obviously bullshit, but she's still acting like the ones who peaked in high school.

:smug:
Who wore it better?
This is the best gift I've ever gotten, thank you! And the answer is forever Chris Farley

I suspect the look she was going for was a bolero, rather than a full cardigan
Sounds about right. Like you said, though, if the item isn't cut that way, it just looks dumb rather than whatever she was going for.

These feeder thumbnails are so fucking gross. I don't know what's worse, the amount of food she's shoveling into her gigantic maw or the way she eye fucks the camera while doing it.
She always stares straight into her camera while she shovels food into her gullet and it's just weird. I know she denies the feeder stuff but there is no other reason for that, no matter how up her own ass she is.

Why does she still bother with the ''I'm dealing with health issues but I don't want to talk about'' bollocks
Any attention is good attention. If people give her shelf pats, awesome. If people tell her to fuck off, she gets to point to it and play victim.

She went from 450 pounds at the end of the Ozempic era to now 520ish pounds
We've talked ad nauseum about how it's all performative for her, and that proves it. She doesn't care about losing weight, it's saying she's on whatever diet that makes her feel happy. In reality, she wants to eat garbage and if she gains weight, so be it. I wonder if Jade will stay around when she needs her ass wiped and sponge bath in bed. Guess we'll find out.

@Diet Coke 4 Life Congratulations on your first climb and best of luck on the next one!
 
We've talked ad nauseum about how it's all performative for her, and that proves it. She doesn't care about losing weight, it's saying she's on whatever diet that makes her feel happy. In reality, she wants to eat garbage and if she gains weight, so be it. I wonder if Jade will stay around when she needs her ass wiped and sponge bath in bed. Guess we'll find out.
Yeah, this era really confirmed that it's a ruse for me. In the past I thought 'Huh, maybe she really is just an idiot'. Nope, she's downright malicious. She will never change because what you're seeing isn't even her, it's a disgusting projection of a mashed up version of whatever she thinks is going to bring her attention at that present moment in time.

To be fair, if she had the intelligence to fake something actually interesting or totally unhinged, she could probably be making a decent living. She could be pretending to be anything for clicks, and she'd be able to change whatever persona she wanted. Her narcissism gives her a lot of power in that regard, she could have manipulated just about anything if she had started early enough and performed well enough.

But her vapid mind chose fake weight loss for 10 years? What a waste. It's a testament to her stupidity.
 
@Diet Coke 4 Life:
23:10 People were expecting a Monday weigh-in. Fuck you all!!! She’s no longer doing Weight Watchers, so her reason to do weekly weigh-ins is now gone. She’s going back to how she lost weight in the first place (cancer?). Says in summer of 2021 she was almost at her highest weight at 569. Says she lost 106 lbs from that point, and she did that by eating in moderation. Because she’s the Queen of Moderation, y’all.

I say again. Cancer?...
Uncommon opinion, but I don't think she lost weight because of cancer. Here's my evidence:

Amber confirmed that her cancer was stage 1B (grade 2). That's a REALLY early stage for the body to be struggling so much that rapid weight loss is occuring.

Amber had gotten to her largest ever, after passing her 572.4lbs weight and refusing to get on a scale so she wouldn't have to admit 600+ lbs. She was an absolute UNIT late fall/early winter 2019. Then Becky became zombified. They got in that near miss when Becky rolled through the stop sign and nearly collided with that other car at the intersection. After that, Becky stopped driving. Amber started eating those 'Freshly' premade meals. She did a series of 'Mook-Bongs' where she blended these premade meals with other random grocery items: celery sticks, oranges, apples, canned green bean, tuna, etc. There was no sign of any fast food, as Amber couldn't get it herself, Becky couldn't drive, and delivery services weren't available in that area in 2019. Amber was likely subsisting off of Freshly, as well as whatever actual food (chicken, fruits, vegetables, etc) she had hoarded in her fridge and large freezer chest from her performative diet grocery hauls.

She was also complaining of feeling unwell at this time from round after round of antibiotics she was taking for her UTI ("Annie Doran" is claiming that she was on even harsher antibiotics for a bad MRSA infection, but who knows if that's true or not).

Then Becky starts getting better and is more functional again. Suddenly, Amber complains of her weight loss slowing, then stagnating. She had claimed that she either made it to the 470s or to the cusp of the 470s. With Becky being more alert and driving again, the Freshly meals were abandoned, with Amber giving the excuse that it was time for her to learn to chose her own meals.

There was little talk about her weight after that, other than her saying weightloss had stalled, and she switched her focus to praising herself on the progress from the previous few months. About a month or so later, her uterus committed seppuku. In her "Here's your proof" (or whatever it was called) video, there was an image of her portal and it was an entry written by the ER doctor. It mentioned "Patient claims to weigh in the 490s". SHE WAS REGAINING WEIGHT BEFORE HER CANCER DIAGNOSIS.

My speculation is that the combination of feeling unwell from tonsilitis and antibiotics, as well as her having to eat real food instead of hyper-palatable processed food products, made her unable to maintain the 4500 calorie/day eating she would have needed to do in order to maintain her 600+ lb weight. To me, this also blows her story of having BED out of the water, because whenever her favourite snacky-poos aren't around, suddenly Amber magically doesn't binge anymore.

If Jade REALLY wants to help Amber to lose weight, she needs to break up with Amber and prepare a quick move out of that apartment. Within 2 weeks, Amber will be showered with makeup on and clean clothing, and will be celebrating her 35lb weight loss by posting some insta thirst trap pics in order to fatfish another caretaker.
 
Vlogmas day 15.

I know I do these late but I want to give Boolean and Diet Coke the chance to go first since they the OGs. Then I time it for work so I get paid for this crap.

Her face is looking fatter than ever. She’s prattling about boxes she sent in the mail I gusss.

She’s prattling about her health.

How much did this necklace cost, I wonder? It’s ugly as sin. What kind of font is that ‘B’? I could barely tell what it was!

Oh god yes. She’s trying to fit it around her fat! Funny as hell. Amber forgot she has a neck. I am now learning that Walmart sells necklace extenders. Things normal people wouldn’t know about.

Why on earth is she filming a taste test reaction for Jade when she’s NEVER ON THE CAMERA. THERES NO REACTION YOU DUMB DUMB DUMMY

sorry, lost my cool there

Bananas that aren’t ripe give her tummy ouchies.

She’s showing us a grocery haul full of veggies and lean means and I ain’t buyin it for a second. She’s just not showing the rest of the garbage she bought.

She bought protein shakes cuz she doesn’t like to eat when she first wakes up. I’m pressing X

She’s stopping the take out tomorrow, guys. How long will this one last? She enjoys the food she makes over takeout but takeout is just THERE. Y’know, when you have an extra $50 to add to any order for DD fees.

Oh no! She made me watch her chores yesterday and I thought we were done, but now she’s continuing the bathroom chores. She has a box of hair accessories but she doesn’t even comb her hair. Which, by the way, is even greasier than yesterday.

I’d have more fun organizing my own bathroom.

Lol she doesn’t use her lower drawers. HHHMMMMMM why could that be?

She has a best friend necklace for her DOG. Good christ

She lets her earrings just sit loose in her drawers and then is surprised when she can’t find a matching pair.

She is not wearing the totally not ugly new necklace Jade just got her.

She’s going to donate lipstick which I KNOW they won’t take. She seriously doesn’t understand how wasteful this is.

Gross. She lets her toothbrush just lie loose in her drawer with necklaces and earrings. Course I keep mine upright in a tooth brush holder and caught my cat chewing on it the other day, so fair play, Amber.

Twinkie still won’t look at her. Avoids eye contact at all costs. Probably salty that you aren’t wearing the best friends necklace.

Hold up

Amber got Twinkie a large pack of doggie treats just like two weeks ago and she’s already on the last one.

Amber can’t lite brite without copying one of the templates on the box. She tried to make a heart and it came out all jagged. Power level, I went to art school so I can properly critique her art, okay?!

Ooooh she added in a shot of her balcony and let us know that she sits outside DAILY, guys.

She’s now talking about her reading slump and one of the comments told her to read a different book. No shit. Someone had to point this out to her. She loves reading SO MUCH THO

People have been noticing her breathing is growing ragged. It’s okay, guys. It’s her lipedema. It’s not her fat, it’s not her fault.

She still isn’t wearing that necklace. Why not just use the hook of the necklace to hook it onto the choker you are wearing now and use that to extend it? Oh, because it’s ugly.

Her binging is the worst it’s been in years. I am EXTREMELY interested to find out what that really means. She should film that. I would actually watch her shovel three bags of Oreos into her mouth.

To be fair…I watched her organize her bathroom, so who here is the REAL loser?

Whenever she claims she binged I imagine that TikTok where she’s shoving cookies into her mouth and sobbing. That was great.

She’s mumbles about how diets don’t work and she needs to EAT INTUITIVELY and I roll my eyes. Same shit, different day. Still fat.

People saying she waddles is RUDE. It’s the LIPEDEMA!!!!

Playdoh. Graaaaaaaaah. She made a fire place. With mist-TOES.

Why did the cat advent calendar come with a Chinese finger trap? The fu?

She refuses to say ‘Fraiche’ which is the name of the commenter of the day. She’s such a good reader, though.
 
Back
Top Bottom