I used to be an alcoholic binge drinker for around 10 years. It will be 1 year in November since I completely quit.
I'm confident that I will not relapse, as I feel no cravings. I feel a bit of nostalgia under specific circumstances where I tell myself:
"Man I'd be having more fun with a complementary glass." That's about all.
So what happened to make me quit?
Three factors and one trigger:
1: Physical/Mental health:
This was the main drive.
I was under a light SSRI treatment for a few years, but I read documentation about its liver toxicity when paired with alcohol abuse. I got an hepatic ultrasound that showed I had a fatty liver and one or two fibrosis spots. Being overweight and sedentary naturally led to a faster health deterioration, I was aware of this and so I grew concerned with the bad blood test results. The professional health workers didn't show concern, probably because they're used to seeing worse blood work, regardless, I wasn't happy with myself.
Mentally, alcohol wasn't really a crutch that some people use when suffering from depression/social anxiety/work related stress. For me it was more of an entertainment booster, I had big binges over the span of 1-3 days where I'd play games (and have a blast lol); then I'd crash and drink sparsely until the next weekly binge.
2: Money:
I don't roll on money and I wasn't happy with the alcohol expenses, I used to be a smoker (I quit in 2020 with vape assistance, 0 nicotine by 2022, as of 2025 I'm no longer vaping) so I understood that these expenses were eating at my monthly budget, and could be used for less harmful hobbies.
3: Family:
Since I was binge drinking, it was easier to conceal the fact that I was a raging alcoholic. I had some relatives that were suspicious and expressed some concerns. I don't necessarily have great relations in my family circle but I acknowledged those signals as an indication that alcohol was indirectly affecting my family relations in a negative way.
The trigger:
GOUT!
What is gout:
What happened:
After spending last summer drinking like a rage pig, winter came. The drop in temperature caused the concentrated uric acid in my big toe joint to crystalize and trigger a massive gout attack that lasted for 2 weeks. The pain was incredible, I had cold sweats at night and just so you know I had gallstones before and this is not even close to a full blown gout attack. This miserable situation forced me to reflect on my situation. I had quit smoking a few years ago, I was going to quit drinking for good.
Of course, going cold turkey wasn't going to be a good idea.
I was already in the process of improving my drinking since I was worried about my bad blood work and liver status. I had removed hard liquors, replaced it with wines, then beers. (They are notorious for triggering gout attacks due to alcohol + high purine levels, it was the reason that led me to get such a massive gout attack because I only drank this that summer.)
My body pretty much forced me to stop beer. I also had to drastically cut on sugary drinks, because yes, they also are a big gout trigger. I was determined to avoid gout attacks as much as possible so I gradually adopted a new life style to help lower blood uric acid levels. I used to do a lot of sport so having this background helped me get back on a good diet and implement a weekly workout schedule.
Today and final statement:
Blood work is looking a lot better, no more hyperglycemia, uric acid is going down, liver looks better (lower ferritin levels) but will need a few more controls. Weight is going down at a steady rate, I don't like weighing myself (it can be tricky to evaluate progress when losing fat and gaining muscle mass), I just focus on my health routine and appreciate the positive results following medical appointments.
Everyone lives alcoholism differently, everyone endures different struggles through life. Just don't give up on yourself, if you think IT'S OVER, I'm here to tell you IT'S NOT OVER UNTIL YOU ARE COLD LIKE KINGCOBRAJFS. Don't be stubborn like him, the first step to recovery is to admit you have a problem. Don't be afraid to speak about it with health professionals. They will not give you a miracle cure, but they offer the support needed to start recovering. Don't feel ashamed of yourself, if you think group therapy can help you, reach out to your local AA group. I feel sorry for Cobes but I'm also grateful that he lived to show others what happens when you just abandon yourself to the mind numbing comfort of booze.