Chris will sashay into the courtroom, annoyed at having to be awake and active before noon but otherwise unbothered. The judge understands that he was forced to mace the ass manager because of his autism and sensory overload brought about by Sanic's blue arms; his lawyer is doing a proper job of representing him, unlike that JERK Rob Bell. Dressed in his most impressive Goodwill finery, Chris stands before the judge, confident that he will get to return home in short order for a much-needed six-hour nap and a blissful afternoon of playing with Legos.
The judge will tell him that she has reached a decision in regards to his punishment. Chris will sigh, for the word "punishment" means he will have to do things that inconvenience him, and that gives him prickly-wicklies. He is sure that he can arrange something with Rocky to meet his community service requirements, but that will still be time wasted that he could have spent playing PSTriple. "Chris," the judge says, "you are sentenced to... one hundred years hard labor in the PVCC gulag!" Then she and the public defender will start screaming "JULAAAAAYY! JULAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYY!" while Chris tard-rages. The bailiffs will rush in to hold him down while the court reporter records his cries and screams.
He lost two years of his life because he tried to do something nice for a woman who was in a possibly dangerous situation (walking down the road alone at night). It's not just the woman though, every one of the people who dropped the thousands of balls in that case should be held accountable. They can't give him the two years back, but the least they can do is give him some money to try and restart his life. 
