7/23 Court Date

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The judge will see the emotional damage that SEGA is causing this beautiful young lesbian woman and immediately order SEGA to change Sonic's arms back NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW and give to Christine her very own thin, wealthy, neuro-typical 18-current age, white Sweetheart as a reward.
Nah. Continuance, then Chris will go to mcdonalds for a healthy mcwrap, go home and shit himself.
 
You have a right under the 6th Amendment to the United States Constitution to face your accuser in a court of law. It's one of those "technicalities" that people "get off" on in court that the government cant produce the alleged victim as a witness so they don't have a case and it goes back to an idea that if they aren't willing to make the accusation in an open court then it probably isn't for real.

Who is his "accuser?" The complainant listed on his court case info is a local cop, not the employee that Chris took aim at. Was Chris not banned from Gamestop when he did this? Not only have we all seen the video, but I'm sure the cop(s) and prosecutor looked at the store's surveillance. I don't think this crime needs a witness, cops got called, they made an arrest and there's evidence of the offense. Even if no person was willing to testify, there's video evidence that Chris committed a crime. And the way the crime is phrased, there doesn't have to be a "victim" of Chris's action, he released a noxious gas in public. But there's no way this will go to trial anyhow.
 
Chris will claim it wasn't him who maced the guy at GameStop, but it was in fact Liquid!

Liquid gets put on trial, but Chris proves his own innocence by reenacting the end court scene in Legally Blonde when Liquid tries to claim he couldn't have been at GameStop because he was in the shower after getting a perm.

Kacey falls in love with Solid Chris all over again, they marry and Liquid is put to death by stoning. Crystal is conceived, Chris runs for president of the United States and wins by a landslide. He exiles Snyder, Megan, and Mary Lee Walsh to Siberia then launches nukes at them, causing WWIII and the eventual nuclear apocalypse. Thanks Chris :c
 
She's trying to do a fluff piece on the po' 'tistic boy getting harrassed by meanies on the Internet. She's very much real.

I wouldn't mind Chris playing the trolls card if it was trolling that drove him to do what he did. But he hadn't been actively trolled for at least a year prior to December 26th.

Lock him up for a few weeks away from his precious Lego and fucking Crayola Model Magic and then send him to a therapist in an attempt to understand the weird ass shit he's done over the last decade or so.
 
He will be declared innocent.
Then, he will exit the court.
He will return to GameStop to fight the new menace: Sonic Boom 2: Ice and Fire!
He will get himself in jail again.
He will be bailed out by Snorlax.
And then he will have to go to court again.

And this will be repeated on a loop until finally Chris gets a lifetime sentence.
 
You have a right under the 6th Amendment to the United States Constitution to face your accuser in a court of law. It's one of those "technicalities" that people "get off" on in court that the government cant produce the alleged victim as a witness so they don't have a case and it goes back to an idea that if they aren't willing to make the accusation in an open court then it probably isn't for real.

His "accuser" in this case is the government, which he will face a representative of.

If it actually goes to a trial, they will probably have to summon the police officer who's named on the case. This is where people get out of traffic citations, because most of the time the cop isn't going to bother showing up (especially if they work overnight) to fight about someone going 7 over the speed limit.

I would imagine a cop would show up for Chris' case, simply because it didn't happen at a weird time (the cop will probably be working at the time) and it's not a minor crime.
 
It's either going to be a continuance, in which case we get another, even worse version of this thread in a months time, or he's finally going to plea out, get sentenced to community service and maybe anger management, and the forums will get extraordinarily autistic at this grave injustice as certain people get really, really angry that Chris isn't going to prison.

His "accuser" in this case is the government, which he will face a representative of.

If it actually goes to a trial, they will probably have to summon the police officer who's named on the case. This is where people get out of traffic citations, because most of the time the cop isn't going to bother showing up (especially if they work overnight) unless it was something major.

Actually in most jurisdictions the cops have a monthly/bimonthly court date that all their cases are put on and they spend the whole day in court. It's not the easy out most people think it is.

And here's an unrelated freebie: It's not entrapment. No matter the scenario, it's probably not entrapment. Please stop using that word internet.
 
I doubt this will be a popular opinion, but I hope he gets sentenced to be a weekend warrior for a few months. It's when you're given x number of days in jail, but you can come in on just Saturdays and Sundays to serve your time (I was offered this when I was issued a warrant for failure to appear on a traffic ticket. Since Chris's crime was violent, this may not even be an option for him. Or maybe it's something specific to my state.) Generally, they clean the jail and court house, wash the police cars, and rake the yard,, and go sweep city streets and stuff in jump suits and ankle shackles. Menial jobs that someone has to do, but why hire a janitor and a lawns keeper when you can have someone do it for free. I think it would humiliate him enough over an extended enough period that he might really learn his actions have consequences.

On a real note, I also hope he gets counseling again and takes it seriously this time. His anger despite him identifying as a kind lesbian soul with a bent duck clash completely, and it would do him good to come to terms with his temper as it relates to his gender.

/Optimistic rating
 
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I doubt this will be a popular opinion, but I hope he gets sentenced to be a weekend warrior for a few months. It's when you're given x number of days in jail, but you can come in on just Saturdays and Sundays to serve your time (I was offered this when I was issued a warrant for failure to appear on a traffic ticket. Since Chris's crime was violent, this may not even be an option for him. Or maybe it's something specific to my state.) Generally, they clean the jail and court house, wash the police cars, and rake the yard,, and go sweep city streets and stuff in jump suits and ankle shackles. Menial jobs that someone has to do, but why hire a janitor and a lawns keeper when you can have someone do it for free. I think it would humiliate him enough over an extended enough period that he might really learn his actions have consequences.

On a real note, I also hope he gets counseling again and takes it seriously this time. His anger despite him identifying as a kind lesbian soul with a bent duck clash completely, and it would do him good to come to terms with his temper as it relates to his gender.

Nah. He would just complain about how his life is unfair and everyone is out against him. He would put minimal effort into the menial jobs, and then after he's done he would complain about it for months on his facebook.

This is the guy that said pulling out weeds and mowing the lawn was hard work.
 
Nah. He would just complain about how his life is unfair and everyone is out against him. He would put minimal effort into the menial jobs, and then after he's done he would complain about it for months on his facebook.

This is the guy that said pulling out weeds and mowing the lawn was hard work.

But if they let him wash the squad cars, he could "accidentally" spray his chest with a hose and get those D cups all moist and soapy while splayed on the hood of the car... :tomgirl:
 
Honest and true opinion? Chris finally gets taken away from Barb due to her inability to regulate his actions and put into a home with other 'high functioning' autistics. There he'll be mocked by them until he realizes he's been using his mental disabilities as a crutch instead of trying to overcome them and become a respectable member of society.

This won't happen, naturally. He'll just probably find himself banned from every GameStop instead, once again putting a band-aid on the gaping wound that is his life.
 
Some kind of support group rehab...thing.

I think we've all come to terms with the fact he is never getting any real prison time for anything he ever does in his life, short of major crimes like murder. It's always going to come back to his autism being used as a way to give him special treatment for his mishaps.
 
I'm also predicting either another continuance, or another light sentence (like the one for the October 28th incident).
 
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