DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[tomstone]

just watched this video and the fucker said he is way over qualified for a mid-management job at a retail store. he really lives in his own little fantasy land.
a guy who has worked ~2 years his whole life and hasnt had a job for 10+ years is OVERQUALIFIED ....

newsflash philbert: you arent even qualified for a job a mcdonalds let alone any kind of management position.

Snowkarl, Jobs, Jealousy - 8/23/21 - Raw Goldust

In this episode DSP rants about Snowkarl, how his trolls are jealous of him, and how he's unemployable.

www.youtube.com

 

[Si vis pacem para bellum]

I noticed he sets his chat to subscriber only mode. Make sure if you are creating accounts and subbing to him to talk shit in his channnel that you unsubscribe when you are done.

Remember how many followers he had on Twitch due to all the fake troll sock accounts? We dont want a similar situation with something that will actually help him like subscribers to his channel. Let his channel continue to die, dont give it some life blood by doing stupid shit.

Good tips, and an even less autistic option is to not do any of that and watch him via other means instead of giving him traffic, giving his fans people to talk to, giving him fake compliments to hide your detractor status, etc. Find a mirror.

And I knew this whole "how am bank work? What am pending? Phil no get u am dumb!" was familiar, was watching a gtg vid and he did the same shit last month with his yt payment..

It wasn't even that long ago that he brought up the twitch paycheck in the same way but only the day or so before because he just needed a little bit. And not long before that you weren't allowed to bring up the twitch payment because that was obsessed troll behavior and sick in in the head to know his behind the scenes finances like that.

I fucking love how Phil talks about him and people like Justin Wong more and more as the years go on even replies to their tweets hoping praying for a positive reply. Phil desperately wants respect from the FGC but he will never get it.

Honestly he talks about them and tries to suckle upon their sack on Twitter in hopes a crumb falls from their table of legitimacy. Then he gets something, anything to validate his mind's fantasy of being amongst figureheads of the fgc. It's hard to have a mental narrative of being a big dog and make that work with the fact that no one likes or knows you and you were a temporary stain for a very brief time. It's odd that he does this despite refusing to engage with any of them in that arena. If he bumped heads with them on fightcade a few times and sent gg tweets with a little comment on what you learned or something that impressed you that would build a relationship. But alas this is Phil and anything beyond imagination and stomping his feet/banning people until he gets his way is too much.

 

[UaineRunei]

just watched this video and the fucker said he is way over qualified for a mid-management job at a retail store. he really lives in his own little fantasy land.
a guy who has worked ~2 years his whole life and hasnt had a job for 10+ years is OVERQUALIFIED ....

newsflash philbert: you arent even qualified for a job a mcdonalds let alone any kind of management position.

Snowkarl, Jobs, Jealousy - 8/23/21 - Raw Goldust

In this episode DSP rants about Snowkarl, how his trolls are jealous of him, and how he's unemployable.

www.youtube.com

He legit thinks he operates a real business and his experience managing a Twitch and Youtube stream chat can be used to manage people irl.

I kinda want him to get a job as a manager, for just one day, to see how long until he says "fuck this" and goes back to his chair and starts OBS.

 

[Anal birth]

I wanted to highlight a marginally interesting addition to the spreadsheet I made awhile back without really mentioning it, which is tracking of AVERAGE TIPS and STANDARD DEVIATION (STDEV). This is going to be some gay math shit so please feel free to skip over.

View attachment 2478241

TL;DR: It seems that overall, in the last several months there has been a decreasing trend of super gigantic single whale tips (especially compared to the 1-2 months following the Twitch de-partnering).

Spoiler: (WARNING) GAY MATH SHIT

We have traditionally looked at the total $ value of tips to determine how Dave is doing in the grifting department, but there are a couple other interesting metrics we can use to look at more specific trends embedded in the overall data. Namely, average tip ($) and STDEV.

Let's look at the columns and see what they mean:

1. Total ($): Self explanatory, this is the total $ value of tips received for that month.

2. # of tips: This is the total number of tips received regardless of their individual value. This number has particular importance in regards to PayPal fee calculations. Here is an example.
- If Dave was tipped $2.50 a hundred times, his gross amount would be $250, and net amount after fees would be $193.78.
- Compare to if he was tipped $5.00 fifty times, his gross amount would still be $250, but his net amount after fees would be $218.28 (an increase of ~12%).

3. AVG tip ($): Simply the total value divided by total # of tips. A higher average value means that the general percentage of tips received are higher. Note that this value gets a bit skewed by super large tips, which is where Standard Deviation can help out a bit.

4. STD DEV: The Standard deviation is used to measure VARIATION or DISPERSION in any given data set. My background is in biomedical sciences so standard deviation is something that will always be assessed in medical studies, research papers, etc. The STDEV can range anywhere from ZERO to INFINITY (it can never be negative). As we can see with the image I posted, the STDEV started out largest at 36.0, and has trended down every single month after that. So what does this mean exactly?

The 68–95–99.7 rule​

This rule states that 68% of all values in a normal distribution will be within 1 STDEV of the MEAN (or AVG tip in this case), 95% within 2 STDEV, and 97.7% within 3 STDEV.
For example: Let's say that Dave had an AVG TIP of $7.00 and a STDEV of 10.0. That would indicate that 68% of all tips received that month were <$17, 95% of all tips received were <$27, and 97.7% of all tips received were <$37.

In May 2021, he had not only a high AVG tip amount, but also a very much higher than usual STDEV. If we look at the following image it's easy to see why, the majority of his insane megatips were given in May, with some scattered in June and July, and basically nothing >$100 in August.
View attachment 2478298

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN AND WHO GIVES A FUCK?
When DSP gets a $200, $500, or $1000 donation, what sort of meaning is behind it compared to a $25 or $50 donation? The answer in my opinion, is hype.

I've always been of the opinion (along with many of you I suspect) that DSP needs drama to consistently pull in whales. Remember, whales make up the lion's share of his donations -- HE NEEDS THEM TO KEEP PULLING IN A SIX-FIGURE ANNUAL INCOME. His biggest drama of the last couple years occurred with his de-partnering and move to YouTube. This generated a supernova of hype that reached across the autism vortex and brought in whales and wheelchairs alike to give tribute to the pigroach. This downward trend is signaling to me that he's falling back into an equilibrium, and if the whale tips are decreasing, then that means he needs to lean more into his fifty bit bitches for support (your carltonjuniors, snowkarls, RomeyROs, Rob Matthews, etc.) With the STDEV on an obvious downward trend, it's clear that the megatips that he has taken completely for granted have begun drying up. (note that if for example a $1000 tip was broken up into smaller chunks, that would drive up the AVG tip and drive down the STDEV).

Why is this a problem? DSP has very clearly begun to openly antagonize this demographic through CONSTANT begging, obvious lying, and inability to draw in new support. It is theoretically a lot easier to hook in an alfredaponte than an OnlyIcedCoffee, and he's going to need a shit ton of fifty bit bitches to make up for even a single lost whale. Obviously his remaining 50 bit bitches are either wheelchairs, trolls, or sycophants, but this logic should still mostly apply. I guess we'll just see if the trend continues.

I'm not sure if a single word of this was useful or interesting but thanks for reading anyway lmao.

Could you repost or maybe send me the raw data? I'd like to plot the raw data and do some t-tests in Prism

 

[Iron Hamster]

View attachment 2478228
Inb4 he kisses the games ass for the entire playthrough because he finally got a positive Twitter interaction

He must think it's an underwater bugsnax.

 

[Coke Zero]

kinda reminds me of the elo hell devs who were carpet bombed with dsp finest moments and then went out of their way to try and cancel his bounty. If the fish devs were to be bombarded with meaningful content, do you think they might attempt some sort of block on dsp profiting off their hardwork?

Yeah I dont think going after indie devs/small devs is the right play for phil at all. These types of teams are much easier to contact and communicate with and I'm sure small guys like this dont want to be connected to dsp's drama at all. Its much easier to flood the social media of these guys with dsp memes than some giant multi million dollar corporation like Activision or whatever.

Phil I'm sure these guys would appreciate having nothing to do with you at all instead of the couple hundred viewers you'll give their game.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

He legit thinks he operates a real business and his experience managing a Twitch and Youtube stream chat can be used to manage people irl.

I kinda want him to get a job as a manager, for just one day, to see how long until he says "fuck this" and goes back to his chair and starts OBS.

Some people say it's Philroach's tendency towards delusions that make him what he is, but really, it's the fact that his bubble being burst like that teaches him nothing. There's simply no such thing as an experience that gets it through his thick fucking skull that he did everything incorrect, and he needs to stop doing what he's doing and thinking what he's thinking.

This is why his dress up game isn't working. Putting on the vest was, from the perspective of his tippers, supposed to be something he had to do if they deigned to let him reach his tips goal that he set. But because Philroach is a greedy overly-sensitive asshole who refuses to do anything for anyone else, he has treated it as being a carrot dangling on a stick in front of tippers to get them to hit the tips goal every stream. Completely fucking himself out of a lot of money. Yes, he has milked it for tens of thousands, but it could have been even more.

His whole stream is like this, really, because he simply will not abide by a very important rule: Know why your audience is there, and give them exactly that, so they don't leave.

 

[Fapcop]

just watched this video and the fucker said he is way over qualified for a mid-management job at a retail store. he really lives in his own little fantasy land.
a guy who has worked ~2 years his whole life and hasnt had a job for 10+ years is OVERQUALIFIED ....

newsflash philbert: you arent even qualified for a job a mcdonalds let alone any kind of management position.

Snowkarl, Jobs, Jealousy - 8/23/21 - Raw Goldust

In this episode DSP rants about Snowkarl, how his trolls are jealous of him, and how he's unemployable.

www.youtube.com

The most bizarre thing is that he claims he’s “overqualified” right after admitting that nobody would hire him since he’s been out of the job market for eleven years. Bizarre!

Phil is still enjoying $100+ days, but only a few hundred people are watching his streams (on Twitch he had what... 5-600 subs? (Granted, many donated subs!)

The day is fast approaching where Phil would earn as much, or more working 8-10 hours for 10$ an hour (Seattle minimum wage, right?) than he will on the streams.

 

[Preferred Penne]

Some people say it's Philroach's tendency towards delusions that make him what he is, but really, it's the fact that his bubble being burst like that teaches him nothing. There's simply no such thing as an experience that gets it through his thick fucking skull that he did everything incorrect, and he needs to stop doing what he's doing and thinking what he's thinking.

This is why his dress up game isn't working. Putting on the vest was, from the perspective of his tippers, supposed to be something he had to do if they deigned to let him reach his tips goal that he set. But because Philroach is a greedy overly-sensitive asshole who refuses to do anything for anyone else, he has treated it as being a carrot dangling on a stick in front of tippers to get them to hit the tips goal every stream. Completely fucking himself out of a lot of money. Yes, he has milked it for tens of thousands, but it could have been even more.

His whole stream is like this, really, because he simply will not abide by a very important rule: Know why your audience is there, and give them exactly that, so they don't leave.

I agree with what you said about Philroach, because Philroach is a Philroach and Philroach should Philroach with his Philroach until Philroach Philroach Philroach.

Philroach.

 

[Fapcop]

Some people say it's Philroach's tendency towards delusions that make him what he is, but really, it's the fact that his bubble being burst like that teaches him nothing. There's simply no such thing as an experience that gets it through his thick fucking skull that he did everything incorrect, and he needs to stop doing what he's doing and thinking what he's thinking.

This is why his dress up game isn't working. Putting on the vest was, from the perspective of his tippers, supposed to be something he had to do if they deigned to let him reach his tips goal that he set. But because Philroach is a greedy overly-sensitive asshole who refuses to do anything for anyone else, he has treated it as being a carrot dangling on a stick in front of tippers to get them to hit the tips goal every stream. Completely fucking himself out of a lot of money. Yes, he has milked it for tens of thousands, but it could have been even more.

His whole stream is like this, really, because he simply will not abide by a very important rule: Know why your audience is there, and give them exactly that, so they don't leave.

Phil is fun to watch in two situations. When he’s begging, ranting, sweating and pleading in EMERGENCY STREAMs, or when he’s fucking up and being bad at a game.

Those are what attracts viewers.

Right now he’s in the bind that he can’t do EMERGENCY STREAMS again for a while, since even the dumbest paypig is starting to smell the gout.


As for games that he’s bad at and will entertain people? His ego, pride and pigheaded insistence that he’s an “evolved and mahture” (and boring as fuck) gamer prevents him from playing those.

So Phil is stuck slowly circling the drain.

Tipsnumbers decreasing, viewers dropping, whales bowing out. It’s not looking good a year out in the future.

So his autistic mindset tells him to try the exact things that worked in the past: Vests! Glasses! Hats!

It’s not going to work of course, but Phil’s autism stubbornness and laziness prevents him from making any real changes.

EDIT: Can you picture Phil working at a Target or something? There’s no way some trolls won’t make their way there to take a picture of DSP wearing a completely different kind of vest and maybe shouting “ITS THE GUY!”

After a decade of living like a hermit, Phil must be fucking terrified of being in an environment where he doesn’t have the power to ban people and say “Fuck you and getta fahk outta here Ack! Ack! Ack!”

I sincerely believe Phil would try to go for SSDI, and claim that “years of online trolling had given him crippling anxiety”’or some shit like that, once the paypig donations reach a level where he’s barely able to scrape by.

 

[Pargon]

Phil is fun to watch in two situations. When he’s begging, ranting, sweating and pleading in EMERGENCY STREAMs, or when he’s fucking up and being bad at a game.

Those are what attracts viewers.

Right now he’s in the bind that he can’t do EMERGENCY STREAMS again for a while, since even the dumbest paypig is starting to smell the gout.


As for games that he’s bad at and will entertain people? His ego, pride and pigheaded insistence that he’s an “evolved and mahture” (and boring as fuck) gamer prevents him from playing those.

So Phil is stuck slowly circling the drain.

Tipsnumbers decreasing, viewers dropping, whales bowing out. It’s not looking good a year out in the future.

So his autistic mindset tells him to try the exact things that worked in the past: Vests! Glasses! Hats!

It’s not going to work of course, but Phil’s autism stubbornness and laziness prevents him from making any real changes.

I also like Phil when he is actually drunk and not just buzzed and surly. Unfortunately his insistence that he is taken seriously at all times (except for the times when he says things which totally and obviously exaggerations not at all meant to tug at wallets) means he won’t get rip-roarin’. As though Wasted Phil is somehow more embarrassing than Normal Phil. I think exceeding that in any way is an impossibility but then again this is a man who put a roll of toilet paper on his head for money so I don’t know what the fuck is real anymore.

 

[Fapcop]

I also like Phil when he is actually drunk and not just buzzed and surly. Unfortunately his insistence that he is taken seriously at all times (except for the times when he says things which totally and obviously exaggerations not at all meant to tug at wallets) means he won’t get rip-roarin’. As though Wasted Phil is somehow more embarrassing than Normal Phil. I think exceeding that in any way is an impossibility but then again this is a man who put a roll of toilet paper on his head for money so I don’t know what the fuck is real anymore.

Wasted Phil is more fun and entertaining (and compassionate, lol! Did you hear him apologizing to the villagers for killing them?! LMAO) than normal Phil.

Alas Phil’s autism and stubbornness seems to have even more power over him than greed though.

Just like a promised payday of hundreds of dollars (whales have previously offered) can’t make him budge a centimeter on his autistic schedule, neither can the promise of money lure Phil out of: “Immah mahture ahdult now!”-mode.

A wildcard would be Kat leaving, and Phil no longer having to pretend that he has a “family”. Though that blow to his ego would probably make him hit the bottle anyways, I suspect.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Right now he’s in the bind that he can’t do EMERGENCY STREAMS again for a while, since even the dumbest paypig is starting to smell the gout.

We'll see how true that is in a few hours when his pre-stream begins and he starts talking about his trip to the vet's office. I doubt he'll be able to restrain himself from letting a tiny bit of guilt-tripping out over the bill.

A wildcard would be Kat leaving, and Phil no longer having to pretend that he has a “family”. Though that blow to his ego would probably make him hit the bottle anyways, I suspect.

It definitely will, because not only is it the second soulmaid to leave him, but it's something detractors have predicted for a long time. The knowledge of how much we're looking forward to seeing him miserable for the rest of his days just by itself is enough to get Philroach hammered NOW, let alone after the inevitable happens.

 

[Kosher Dill]

I wanted to highlight a marginally interesting addition to the spreadsheet I made awhile back without really mentioning it, which is tracking of AVERAGE TIPS and STANDARD DEVIATION (STDEV).

I'm not sure how much sense it makes to run "statistics" that are really just tracking the behavior of one or two whales behind a dozen socks. Plus, whale tips aren't always random - it looks very much like they have an arrangement with Phil to tip "Whatever gets to the next goal", whether that's in installments or all at once. So it's not an independent variable.
What might be more enlightening is specifically tracking non-whale engagement, whether that's in raw dollar amounts or perhaps # of tips per stream.

 

[ZehnBoat]

oh please phil, play the fish game
do it
i played the demo, and it's not easy
please go full ass-kiss mode
die over and over and over, as you confusedly wonder what to do

 

[Si vis pacem para bellum]

Some people say it's Philroach's tendency towards delusions that make him what he is, but really, it's the fact that his bubble being burst like that teaches him nothing. There's simply no such thing as an experience that gets it through his thick fucking skull that he did everything incorrect, and he needs to stop doing what he's doing and thinking what he's thinking.

I disagree, I think he has some things he's better at denying reality than others. He had a couple bad days of tips, ran a failed begathon, and immediately sprung for the Xbox and chair to save the stream. It's wild that he is so deluded to think that his benefits like the chair, laptop, and even Xbox constitute a positive change for the stream and not just him but I think he really does think it all hits the fans. What's criminal is that more people don't repeat when he has bad tip streams that people tip him to say that they enjoy the content and don't when they don't. The thing that most isolates him is that you can't disagree with him so he's the only voice in his arena and it's always right because any correction is wrong and banned. This is what made old style tihydp so damaging to him. They attracted a lot of attention with hundreds of thousands of comments he couldn't ignore despite the effort. The voice of opposition was too pronounced. Now detractors are in their own hug boxes and the trolls pay him moreso than before, something that legitimately got as big as it did during Tevin's tenure. It's a shame it is the way it is because all the current restreamers and content creators are relatively new to the scenes, most post-leanna no less so a lot of what they cover has big holes and misses the spirit of events and often DSP is the primary source now. But you can't take a tihydp out of time context and it appeals to all those interested, even his loyal fans enjoyed them as edited content better than his own.

 

[Fapcop]

We'll see how true that is in a few hours when his pre-stream begins and he starts talking about his trip to the vet's office. I doubt he'll be able to restrain himself from letting a tiny bit of guilt-tripping out over the bill.

It definitely will, because not only is it the second soulmaid to leave him, but it's something detractors have predicted for a long time. The knowledge of how much we're looking forward to seeing him miserable for the rest of his days just by itself is enough to get Philroach hammered NOW, let alone after the inevitable happens.

Clues and signs that the Soulmaid has left:

1: Phil appears pissy drunk on stream more often than usual.

2: No mentioning of Khat in his monologues.

3: Shoutouts and questions about Khat will be ignored, occasionally the “offender” will get a bahn and an angry rant about staying the fahk outta his private life.

Eventually of course, and there’s no doubt he’ll delay this as long as possible, Phil will make a pity/EMERGENCY stream where he’s “hahnest” with everyone, tells that Khat has left, blah blah, nobody’s fault, blah blah grew apart and the pressure from trolls, blah blah and Khat totally didn’t move in with the assistant manager three months ago.

Oh and by the way.., With Khat moving out, half of the incomes that usually paid the bills is gone, Phil is really worried who won’t be able to pay his tahxes, mortgage and bills, so if you can tip, he needs the money right now, he really does!

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

I sincerely believe Phil would try to go for SSDI, and claim that “years of online trolling had given him crippling anxiety”’or some shit like that, once the paypig donations reach a level where he’s barely able to scrape by.

He's already planting the full-disablility seeds. In his mind if he claims back problems enough on Youtube that qualifies - we all know he hasn't been to a doctor and there aren't any who would go along with it.

 

[Fapcop]

He's already planting the full-disablility seeds. In his mind if he claims back problems enough on Youtube that qualifies - we all know he hasn't been to a doctor and there aren't any who would go along with it.

Phil would probably have better luck with a psychiatric illness of sorts. (Hello late diagnosed autism!)

Crippling anxiety would be an obvious one for Phil. Not only is it something that’s impossible to test for properly.
(“Do you suffer panic attacks?” “Yes! Every day!”)

Phil also has literally tens of thousands of Google results that could make some quack doctor diagnose him with PTSD or some shit like that.

The whole way the SSDI system is set up, also pretty much means that if you keep at it for long enough, sooner or later you’ll get it.

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

Phil would probably have better luck with a psychiatric illness of sorts. (Hello late diagnosed autism!)

Crippling anxiety would be an obvious one for Phil. Not only is it something that’s impossible to test for properly.
(“Do you suffer panic attacks?” “Yes! Every day!”)

Phil also has literally tens of thousands of Google results that could make some quack doctor diagnose him with PTSD or some shit like that.

The whole way the SSDI system is set up, also pretty much means that if you keep at it for long enough, sooner or later you’ll get it.

"To be considered for disability benefits due to an anxiety disorder, Social Security requires medical evidence that you have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, and that as a result of this condition you have been unable to work for at least 12 months. Based on your current income and work history, you may apply for Social Security Disability (SSD) and/or Supplemental Security Income (SSI) benefits."

Getting Social Security Disability Benefits for Anxiety Disorders

What you need to prove to get Social Security disability benefits for a severe anxiety disorder.

www.nolo.com