DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[SocietyLiver1488]

Man, not to flex but I’m stuck in the hospital today (nothing serious yet I hope lol) but just watching the nurses and real people out here busting their asses all day really heightens my loathing and disgust for phil. If and when he bitches about working hard or his schedule he deserves all the actual hate he gets. Dude is just not living in reality, like a retarded version of the Truman show. I long for the day when it’s just him, his two retarded whales, and his sad sad bots left in that pathetic excuse of a room he calls an “office”. Oh and maybe that sad lil karate kid trophy lol. What a goon

Yeah I usually laugh at Phil and his glorified special ed class, but it turns to MATI when I'm having an especially hard day at work and think about how he's there collecting a paycheck in his jammies, and his biggest workday annoyance is how they made it too hard for him to install DLC on Xbox gameshare. Reeeee

 

[Fapcop]

Yeah I usually laugh at Phil and his glorified special ed class, but it turns to MATI when I'm having an especially hard day at work and think about how he's there collecting a paycheck in his jammies, and his biggest workday annoyance is how they made it too hard for him to install DLC on Xbox gameshare. Reeeee

Gotta love it when Phil makes excuses for how cahmplicated his “jahb” is.

“I gotta watch the chat and make shoutouts, be entertaining and play the game... There’s A LOT that goes into streaming ok?”

 

[Guess i'm toxic now!]

Whenever I picture Phil on his day off, I get a mental image of the soulmaid driving his lazy ass while Phil is playing WWE Champions.

Nobody says anything.

Then Khat’s lifeless eyes light up for a second.

Kat: “So ehm... I think I’ll go to the Jim tomorrow.”

Phil: “Mhm... *SNORT* Didn’t you say you were sore from yesterday?”

Kat: “Well... Yeah but it’s the good kind of sore, right? Anyways, so I’ll probably be home after eight. Or nine.

Sad how accurate this probably is. Phil is a spoiled child living a comfy lifestyle all while feigning he is poor.

His wife is a glorified maid, and his sex life is probably very sparse if Khat and Phil even have sex.

You also can tell how pussy whipped Phil is, considering he gets super uncomfortable when there is a sex scene, or flirty female characters.

As if Khat is watching and is about to pounce at the thought of Piggy getting a chub.

Nothing says a healthy relationship like a jealous wife, and an addiction riddled husband.

 

[Fapcop]

Sad how accurate this probably is. Phil is a spoiled child living a comfy lifestyle all while feigning he is poor.

His wife is a glorified maid, and his sex life is probably very sparse if Khat and Phil even have sex.

You also can tell how pussy whipped Phil is, considering he gets super uncomfortable when there is a sex scene, or flirty female characters.

As if Khat is watching and is about to pounce at the thought of Piggy getting a chub.

Nothing says a healthy relationship like a jealous wife, and an addiction riddled husband.

It’s pretty telling how embarrassed he gets every time he does that Freudian Slip and calls her “mom”.

 

[25 Invisible push-ups]

Gotta love it when Phil makes excuses for how cahmplicated his “jahb” is.

“I gotta watch the chat and make shoutouts, be entertaining and play the game... There’s A LOT that goes into streaming ok?”

It apparently is pretty complicated, considering he fails at 2 of those 4 things you mentioned.

 

[Beverly Sutphin]

That's exactly why he got popular to begin with.

Because he pushed out videos for the new games before others did.

Sure they were low effort raw videos, but still people watched them because he had big chunks of the game out there.

However times changed and Phil just kept doing the same shit over and over.

His idea of "growth" comes from leeching off of the quality/hype of a game, because at the end of the day he has no other entertainment value.

Phil isn't edgy anymore, and he doesn't have charismatic partners like John or Howard to float his videos.

Phil is a dinosaur of youtube and he just needs to give it up, the time of growth from "new games" is past, now people expect quality and entertainment.

This! All of fucking this!

Phil throws spaghetti at the wall hoping that ANYTHING sticks, to where he can be "successful" in his eyes. When he brought up that fucking Tekken trophy from 1997, while saying "Looking at this makes me feel good." shows that dude is holding onto ANYTHING of noteworthy in his past, as he knows he's a fucking loser. Dude is a real life Al Bundy - and that trophy is part of his 4 touchdowns in one game - which he gloated last night. He's unemployable, he KNOWS he's the laughingstock of the internet, and he hates his life.

 

[Hogan of the South]

It’s pretty telling how embarrassed he gets every time he does that Freudian Slip and calls her “mom”.

Still some of the most butt Puckering things to fall out of that stroked off mouth of his. “Mom…I mean my wife tuhuhuhuh. “

seriously get some therapy Phil. That stuff only leads down dark roads

 

[King of Not Playing Games]

Holo streamers need sophisticated 3D models and high quality cameras to capture rigging properly, as well as the ability to emote effectively despite a limited range of facial expressions and body language.

Jerma apparently is living in a shed and his watchers are giving him wild and unreasonable requests he has to fulfill?

Speed runners need to go on stream every day ready for a marathon and the certain chance of failure by seconds or fractions of a second, and this is after the pressure and practice of getting a game exactly right.

off the top of my head that’s three basic categories of streamer that do more work in a day than DSP does in a month.

 

[25 Invisible push-ups]

This! All of fucking this!

Phil throws spaghetti at the wall hoping that ANYTHING sticks, to where he can be "successful" in his eyes. When he brought up that fucking Tekken trophy from 1997, while saying "Looking at this makes me feel good." shows that dude is holding onto ANYTHING of noteworthy in his past, as he knows he's a fucking loser. Dude is a real life Al Bundy - and that trophy is part of his 4 touchdowns in one game - which he gloated last night. He's unemployable, he KNOWS he's the laughingstock of the internet, and he hates his life.

I agree, but at least Al Bundy had a job.

 

[BlackDragoons]

I agree, but at least Al Bundy had a job.

Ehh I wouldn't compare DSP to Al Bundy. The man himself has his faults but the men is supposed to be the everyday working class stiff raising a family he actually loves versus DSP who uses his family to beg for money.


I would rather have a beer with Al then with DSP.

 

[N0thingICanDo]

If anyone still not believe that Phil is a faggot

Here's his reaction reading this dialogue from 12 minutes

And 30 minutes later, he dress up like this

Tell me he is not gay

 

[UaineRunei]

That's exactly why he got popular to begin with.

Because he pushed out videos for the new games before others did.

Sure they were low effort raw videos, but still people watched them because he had big chunks of the game out there.

However times changed and Phil just kept doing the same shit over and over.

His idea of "growth" comes from leeching off of the quality/hype of a game, because at the end of the day he has no other entertainment value.

Phil isn't edgy anymore, and he doesn't have charismatic partners like John or Howard to float his videos.

Phil is a dinosaur of youtube and he just needs to give it up, the time of growth from "new games" is past, now people expect quality and entertainment.

Yep, and now it's impossible for him to do this because there are many people getting an early copy so they can review or do a Let's Play with it. He won't be the first to shit out any game footage anymore.

Also his autistic schedule doesn't help either. Game releases in his day off? "Uh... No, I'm not gonna play it, it's my day off duhuhuh".

 

[JamFlowMan]

Still some of the most butt Puckering things to fall out of that stroked off mouth of his. “Mom…I mean my wife tuhuhuhuh. “

seriously get some therapy Phil. That stuff only leads down dark roads

Can't remembering this happening with Panda either. The best case scenario is Phil calls Kat Mom when speaking to his "son" Jasper, and that's still pretty fucking weird but better then any alternatives for this frequent slip of the tongue.

 

[King of Hateful Slurs]

Holo streamers need sophisticated 3D models and high quality cameras to capture rigging properly, as well as the ability to emote effectively despite a limited range of facial expressions and body language.

Jerma apparently is living in a shed and his watchers are giving him wild and unreasonable requests he has to fulfill?

Speed runners need to go on stream every day ready for a marathon and the certain chance of failure by seconds or fractions of a second, and this is after the pressure and practice of getting a game exactly right.

off the top of my head that’s three basic categories of streamer that do more work in a day than DSP does in a month.

It's a shame DSP never did an actual Vtuber rant yet because I would love to see them making fun of him. He probably knows they do much more work than he does and his donations pale in comparison.

 

[Fapcop]

This! All of fucking this!

Phil throws spaghetti at the wall hoping that ANYTHING sticks, to where he can be "successful" in his eyes. When he brought up that fucking Tekken trophy from 1997, while saying "Looking at this makes me feel good." shows that dude is holding onto ANYTHING of noteworthy in his past, as he knows he's a fucking loser. Dude is a real life Al Bundy - and that trophy is part of his 4 touchdowns in one game - which he gloated last night. He's unemployable, he KNOWS he's the laughingstock of the internet, and he hates his life.

At least Al Bundy had an actual achievement in his past.

And was employable.
(Can you imagine Phil working in a shoe store? “You want to try on another size? Ok that’s it! Gettafuck outta mah store! You’re banned! ACK! ACK! ACK!”)

And had a hot wife.

 

[Forbidden Math]

Yep, and now it's impossible for him to do this because there are many people getting an early copy so they can review or do a Let's Play with it. He won't be the first to shit out any game footage anymore.

Also his autistic schedule doesn't help either. Game releases in his day off? "Uh... No, I'm not gonna play it, it's my day off duhuhuh".

I love how he still bitches about this too. Any time anyone mentions people getting early copies his vagina is filled to the brim with sand instantly.

 

[TankMelee]

It's a shame DSP never did an actual Vtuber rant yet because I would love to see them making fun of him. He probably knows they do much more work than he does and his donations pale in comparison.

He mentioned it in his Yakuza 7 playthrough, but unfortunately knows too little to really go into detail (Mrhuth link). They're doing a character (just like most other top streamers!), and some are basically waifus which is stoopid, but he also doesn't really know anything about them. He just fits them into his pre-existing children's entertainer->thot spectrum of streamers.

 

[Jose Cuervo]

Yep, and now it's impossible for him to do this because there are many people getting an early copy so they can review or do a Let's Play with it. He won't be the first to shit out any game footage anymore.

Also his autistic schedule doesn't help either. Game releases in his day off? "Uh... No, I'm not gonna play it, it's my day off duhuhuh".

Him ignoring somewhat important releases doesn’t help, either.

Spoiler: To avoid wall of text

Anyway, Mr. “mature adult with a business degree” doesn’t realize the main reasons as to why people mainly watch streamers nowadays:

- The streamer plays a specific game/genre in a competitive level and can offer hindsight into it;

- The streamer’s charismatic and engages with their audience.

Ideally, a great streamer combines both, and Phil has neither.

It’s no longer about the games, if anyone wants to check gameplay they can go to YouTube and watch a video without any commentary.

Despite this, Phil could still have a niche audience if he didn’t have that much of an ego: admit that he’s horrible at playing videogames and not read any guides preemptively or let his chat play them for him to let himself become genuinely frustrated while playing.

This way, he’d actually be somewhat entertaining. Just look at the number of stream viewers when he plays a Souls-like game and compare to most of his other playthroughs, most want to see him fail and he knows it. It’s just that his ego doesn’t want to acknowledge it.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Phil's remaining desire to be this respected gaming journalist is one of his more puzzling idiosyncrasies.

It's obvious he doesn't enjoy gaming, which I guess is understandable when you force yourself to do it ~60 hours per week (not including Champions).

Even if Phil was a heavily invested gamer, he'd have to travel constantly to go to conventions and shit. Do interviews, suck up to game companies. None of this would be appealing in the slightest to Phil today.

 

[QwahlityKahntent]

But Phil IS a comedian! One of the best of all time, apparently.Philcomedian.mp4

holy damn, he was probably in his late 20s here and he looks like a literal grandpa