Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

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Coolio55 said:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=KwBRNRkUAkw
TLDR: How to scam 12 year old fanbase
  • Set up a kickstarter for a minecraft clone
  • When kickstarter is finished, immediately take a large percentage of the money for "business reasons"
  • Give the remaining to some no-name studio with no prior projects
  • When people complain, get some other company to offer everyone ANOTHER EARLY ACCESS MINECRAFT CLONE
Also: Get really mad at gamergate, scream at (now cancer inflicted) ex-friend John Bain and dox 11 year olds on twitter while somehow maintaining moral high ground

E: Also get in on that lucrative underage pussay like Sjin and Ridgedog
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So the goon model is steal a bunch of money and then molest a bunch of children and then turn into troons.
 
A Cat said:
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Did we bury the lede with this one? What's a career marketing professional doing begging and scamming goons?
 
Ilmseil said:
Someone has to start writing LowT fiction. I mean, he's an isolated, degenerate, drug addict, libertine, mentally ill freak living in a labyrinthine, non-euclidean castle in a remote eastern euro country, constantly trying to attract vulnerable women as victims in his sickening schemes that could only be borne in a disturbed mind.
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But the true story of Lowtax is already far more entertaining and horrifying than anything anyone else could come up with. Trading what could have become a money making machine or a least a one time large windfall for an office in an abandoned strip mall in Lee's Summit, boxed wine, and allegations of domestic abuse is a hell of a legacy.
 
MirnaMinkoff said:
“Me and Lowtax”...she already sounds like a crazy, possessive, insecure girlfriend.

But she’s got big plans, lots of plans and strategies...just wait you’ll see.
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It's almost like she has *looks at textbook* Borderline Personality Disorder...
and should be *holds up clipboard* shot out of a cannon into a wall.
 
Well you see if the front page and live-streams go from making $5 to $50 that’s a tenfold increase!

I don’t know about you guys but I just pulled out of my 401k to invest in this!!! What are you going to be doing with all your newfound wealth?? I think I’m going to open a summer camp with a bunch of fun attractions. Maybe a rollercoaster that dumps you into an oven, a ride that masturbates you to death, a swimming pool with an electric floor, a petting zoo with a bear and an eagle, and arts and crafts making weird leathery lampshades. Attendance will be free and also mandatory for current SA posters!
 
Leonard Helplessness said:
Isn't Amethyst some crazy TGRS troon with a Steven Universe avatar? And here he's obsessively hunting for suspected narcissists. Big think.
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Some of the posters still have a bit of the old goon spirit in them. Occasionally one of them will unleash some autistic fury and remind you of how things used to be, and how bad things have become.
 
Learned Hand said:
EJ, Starfleet Dental, Slam Whales, Bad Games Crew, BMW, Goonrathi, etc, all kind of formed this way. What was left without new blood, is what you have now in WoW: a few hundred terrible players creating a "safe space" for trans posting, lead by a self-admitted suicidal and depressed troon who cannot clear 15 year old content.
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Didn't Starfleet Dental go woke and start screening goon applicants for wrongthink, or was that another STO guild?
 
repentance said:
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Bogan's Twitter apparently counts as "offsite shit", even when she's talking about SA.

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The more she talks about her super secret plans for SA that common folk can't understand the more obvious it becomes that she doesn't respect her/Lowtax's customers at all and just wants power over SA's users and Lowtax himself. At first she was just some dumb BPD thot shacking up with Lowtax, now she's showing just how unlikable and naive she really is.

The "business professional" that will tell you how fucking stupid you are for asking her about her plans for the website you use.
 
When I was studying marketing I must have been asleep during the lecture where they told us to sarcastically insult your client's dwindling customer base on social media.
 
Spunt said:
When I was studying marketing I must have been asleep during the lecture where they told us to sarcastically insult your client's dwindling customer base on social media.
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And that's why you're where you're at, and Logan Day is where she's at: A web 1.0 has-been's stay at home side piece.

If you studied as hard as she did, you could be the one getting a share Lowtax's patron bucks and pill stash.
 
Trying to imagine literally any other company having some sort of marketing or branding expert come on the scene, immediately start condescending and insulting the clients customer base on social media and then begin referring to them as little people, only to have the owner of the business rush out to publicly defend them and ban anyone daring to go "wtf is this" instead of shit canning their ass immediately for damage control. Lmao the Overton window of what is normal is so far gone for lowtax. I don't think it has ever set in that she can't just ban every single person mildly insulting his thin-skinned bitch ass without actually Banning the people running his forums content now.
 
Totally normal for a "branding specialist" to insult a "business" owner's soon-to-be ex-wife a cunt on social media.
 
Ilmseil said:
Trying to imagine literally any other company having some sort of marketing or branding expert come on the scene, immediately start condescending and insulting the clients customer base on social media and then begin referring to them as little people, only to have the owner of the business rush out to publicly defend them and ban anyone daring to go "wtf is this" instead of shit canning their ass immediately for damage control. Lmao the Overton window of what is normal is so far gone for lowtax. I don't think it has ever set in that she can't just ban every single person mildly insulting his thin-skinned bitch ass without actually Banning the people running his forums content now.
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Lowtax is permanently stuck in his web 1.0 glory days. It's got to be absolutely embarassing to have gone from an internet heavy hitter to an absolute fucking nobody. The rules didn't used to apply. Web 1.0 was a lot smaller and more tight knit, lowtax is used to being able to throw his weight around. I think he believes there's something that makes him and his site special. This is exactly the kind of attitude that someone would cultivate when fame got to their head.

Someone talks back to an admin and LowT immediately feels attacked.
"Oh yeah? Let's see YOUR webforum make 50 grand!!" user has been banned for this post
 
Those Burt posts read like someone in denial about the idiot running the place he volunteers as mod for. "I'm SURE they know what they're doing...I just wondered...hmmmm...no, it'll be fine" lol
 
Back me up! said:
Starfleet Dental went woke lately in Guild Wars 2. Fitting that the current leader, Clam Down, is also a mod on the form. A dying game for a dying website.
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Lol in STO they used to make fun of trannies and shit in the designated ERP space station. What a bunch of cry baby faggots
 
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