💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Zero fks to give]

shocked he even listed the recipe/directions in the video description

CWJ is such a snoozefest these days. 4 minute low energy video where he hastily puts together some crime against food and then says it tastes good. JOTG is where the real fun/cringe is at but he barely uploads there anymore after his stroke

I agree, it's ssdd every video. Thankfully YouTube recommends prestroke gems like this.
At approx 7:17 Tammy is cutting his meat and he's pretending to be stroke disabled..

Shady Cove Restaurant - Castalian Springs, TN

Get the JAKATAK app for iPhone/iPad: https://goo.gl/WeupOL Android version coming soon. Buy Jack's sauces at: http://TheBestSauces.com

youtu.be

 

[Adamska]

Mashed potatoes should at no fucking point drip down in strings; that is genuinely horrifying. It also came off as like he just ate the damn shit after stirring it around and pretending it was hot and ready; I am actually curious now if he'll just eat a raw turkey when he gets to that particular video.

Like, the fucked thing is I believe you could actually do a decent "Asian Style" mash; use some crushed ginger, a bit of wasabi for heat, mix in a hint of scallion, salt and pepper, and then make your mix. But nahh, this was just Gluttonous Jack wanting buttery cheese-potatoes from hell.

Also why not just make a fucking compound butter? Look, I know it's Salmonella Jack and so it's too late for that, but why not just make some seasoned butter that you just plain mix in?

I've missed his "tablespoon" measurements. This is just like the tablespoons of mayonnaise in his Salad Night video.

Fatty thinks and lies to himself that a "tablespoon" is a serving/ice cream spoon. He does that every. Single. Time.

I half think he pretends he doesn't know what a tablespoon is, so he can deny that he's overdoing butter or lard whenever he spoons that shit in.

Charles removed Jack's channel from his featured channels "My Friend's Channels." They were there pretty recently. Would love to know what caused the rift. Charles turning on comments? Charles not being willing to do more awful Sushi Wars videos?
View attachment 1007496

Bitchboy Jack literally sobs in rage over a friend being more liked and doing his job better in two months. Weeping Pussy reees at the idea of having free comments open to the public because he's more thin skinned that most tween girls. Gluttonous Fuck of a Pig screeches and unfriends him over no more excuses he can use to hork down fish and claim its for a show.

I cannot emphasis how much of a cowardly baby Jack is.

 

[Wilhelm Bittrich]

Charles removed Jack's channel from his featured channels "My Friend's Channels." They were there pretty recently. Would love to know what caused the rift. Charles turning on comments? Charles not being willing to do more awful Sushi Wars videos?
View attachment 1007496

Would love what the rift was? You mean apart of the effort this man puts into making his videos unlike Jack?
I watched just two of his videos and I must say I enjoyed them. I'm sure I'll try out his recipes which is something I never would do with Jack's crap.

 

[Chamulum]

I do want to see someone cook a Thanksgiving Feast only using CWJ recipes. Someday.

 

[EvilDroid64]

I do want to see someone cook a Thanksgiving Feast only using CWJ recipes. Someday.

That's one way to make sure the in-laws don't come back next year.

 

[LordofCringe7206]

It never made sense to have anything to do with a fat loser like Jack.

My guess is that he associated with Jack because he thought he needed a professional Youtuber with a little bit of popularity to get his channel off the ground.

Good to see that he finally realized that Jack knows jack shit about the things he does.

 

[Shaved Kiwis]

View attachment 1007240
Jackie Limp Limb somehow fucks up scooping a massive amount of butter.
(Note the 2 large piles of butter already in the bowl)

To be honest I'm a little suprised he didn't just grab the container with his good hand, flip it over and dump the whole thing into his "food" trough.

Mashed potatoes should at no fucking point drip down in strings; that is genuinely horrifying. It also came off as like he just ate the damn shit after stirring it around and pretending it was hot and ready; I am actually curious now if he'll just eat a raw turkey when he gets to that particular video.

Bwahahahaha!!! I've been out of the loop for a bit. I pop in and causally skim through the last page and the hits just keep on coming. Never in ten million years would I have guessed that that bowl of spider-man jizz was supposed to be the mashed potatoes. I can't believe that this is real anymore. It defies all logic. By this point anybody would have gotten at least a little bit better...or gave up. I'm finally convinced that this dude is Ashton Kutcher in a fat suit. He is doing a fat American take on Borat. After he's taped enough content for MTV he will reveal the ruse.

I mean I've made cheesy mashed potatoes before and even if I added a ton of cheese I just don't see how I could make them do that without eating a bunch of acid.

 

[AnOminous]

My guess is that he associated with Jack because he thought he needed a professional Youtuber with a little bit of popularity to get his channel off the ground.

Good to see that he finally realized that Jack knows jack shit about the things he does.

That's more than Jack has figured out about Jack.

 

[bigshot]

Maple syrup? Bitch, why? If they were sweet potatoes I could almost get it, but fucking hell that has to taste like absolute garbage.

I'd take a little bit of maple syrup with bacon over wasabi in mashed potatoes any day of the week. How long did it take him to mash that stuff into wads of stringy slop with one hand? I bet he's had a lot of practice making wads of stringy slop one handed.

He could have let the butter come to room temperature before carving it off. He could have used fresh butter too. And not just slop everything in by the bucket load.

 

[Aaway]

My guess is that he associated with Jack because he thought he needed a professional Youtuber with a little bit of popularity to get his channel off the ground.

Good to see that he finally realized that Jack knows jack shit about the things he does.

that's exactly it

charles mentioned when he first started the channel that everyone at their church knew jack as "the youtube guy." so charles, not knowing a thing about youtube figured jack was some sort of youtube guru who could help him start a channel and gain tons of subs

little did he know jack is an incompetent pussy and sucks at everything he does. in fact, its safe to say jack's presence was actually hurting fish hook because instead of fishing videos you would see them eating fast food fish sandwiches. fish hook has gained far more subs post-jack

 

[AnOminous]

little did he know jack is an incompetent pussy and sucks at everything he does. in fact, its safe to say jack's presence was actually hurting fish hook because instead of fishing videos you would see them eating fast food fish sandwiches. fish hook has gained far more subs post-jack

I'd assume Jack also tried to pull rank somehow and it pissed him off. Jack is the kind of complete douchebag who would assume he was the alpha.

 

[DuckSucker]

Just drop all pretense and eat the (French Onion)"butter" off the spoon, good god, man!

Call it a "butter review" if you have to make yourself feel better about it. Or better yet, a butter mukbang, those get higher priority with monetization I think.

I think Paula Dean ate less butter and Betty Crocker midcentury "Americana" shit, and they were paying her to eat butter,

 

[Shambler]

ya know at least sandra lee put wasabi in hers

 

[A single cheeto]

User: A Single Cheeto
CoD: Burning his house down with him inside it
KP: 80085

 

[Anal birth]

OFFICIAL JACK SCALFANI DEATH POOL

USER​	CAUSE OF DEATH​	EST. DATE OF DEATH​	KETO POINTS​
Murmur​	Heart Attack​	Early 2021​	500​
Wilhem Bittrich​	3rd Stroke​	Mid to Late 2020​	300​
The Wichita Lion​	Ham Sandwich​	May 11, 2021 (Ramadan)​	420​
FemalePresident​	3rd Stroke​	March, 2021​	666​
SmileyTimeDayCare​	Sepsis by Food Poisoning​	Early 2022​	456​
Religion is Dead​	Diabetes​	Mid 2020​	600​
Mesosalpinx​	Gangrene w/ side of diabetes and cholesterol​	April, 2020​	365​
Chamulum​	3rd Stroke and diabetes combo​	Early to Mid 2020​	148​
Mein Garten​	Coronary artery disease w/ an aneurysm​	Fall 2021​	1965​
Begemot​	Trichinosis​	April, 2020​	350​
Man vs persistent rat​	Stroke leading to coma and death​	August, 2022​	400​
Xochi​	Beaten to death by actual chefs​	January, 2021​	19,324,557,416​
captkrisma​	Stroke and heart failure​	Late, 2020​	1​
Waifuman Cooper​	Stroke​	June, 2020​	1776​
AnOminous​	Stroke​	Julay 4th, 2020​	2020​
Rod Dangerous​	Pulmonary embolism​	4th Quarter 2022​	25​
LordofCringe7206​	Salmonella Infection​	March, 2020​	2​
Captain Fitzbattleaxe​	Complications from gastric bypass surgery​	March, 2023​	500​
Suburban Bastard​	Berry Aneurysm​	January, 2021​	6969​
Dave Meltzer​	Murdered by Maury Davis for shoe related transgression​	Christmas Eve 2019​	202​
Adamska​	Cardiac Arrest​	June, 2022​	3,350​
Stock Photo Hacker​	Shot by a rogue Mcdonalds manager​	April, 2020​	420​
Archie_Kimkicker​	Thrown off cliff by Tammy's bull (for insurance)​	February, 2020​	1488​
Redeemer and Destroyer​	3rd Stroke​	Summer 2020​	777​
Spasticus Autisticus​	Heart Attack from witnessing Tammy making love to a black gentleman​	February, 2021​	69​
Kamov Ka-52​	Stroke​	Mid 2020​	1488​
Pineapple Fox​	Gangrene caused by uncontrolled diabetes​	October, 2020​	30​
GandT​	Choked out by son​	June 21st, 2020 (Father's Day)​	420​
Mr. Manchester​	Complications from final stroke​	April, 2021​	201​
desu91​	Stroke w/ a side of head trauma​	Mid 2020​	9001​
ObeseScreaming- BlackMan​	Crushed by AS SEEN ON TV gadgets.​	Winter 2021​	42069​
salmonellajack​	Head trauma via shoe​	April, 2020​	187​
Coconut Gun​	Natural causes while surrounded by loved ones​	Summer 2054​	0​
irishAzoth​	Cirrhosis​	Summer 2022​	1337​
GloriousRapeRabbit​	Heart attack after stroke and two year coma​	April, 2022​	789​
Chive Turkey​	3rd Stroke​	June, 2025​	7​
Mr._Blonde​	4th Stroke​	April, 2022​	300​
Scented Candle​	Smited by the good Lord for blasphemous onion ring sorcery​	February, 2024​	80,085​
Zaryiu​	Atherosclerosis​	2020 or 2030+​	2013​
Dirty Mug​	Chokes on a dick burger post 3rd stroke​	December, 2021​	1488​
Slimy Time​	Fatal stroke​	July, 2022​	1266​
feral cat #6385​	Mr. Hands'ed by Tammy's bull after a case of mistaken identity​	June 21st, 2020​	9001​

To enter, reply to this post with your guess at the cause of death, a rough estimate on when, and how many Keto Points you are betting.



On the day of Jack's death, the entrant with the best guess will receive ALL Keto Points entered into the pool.

This post will be updated as bets come in. Good luck to you all!

User: Raindrop3000
Cause: Killed as collateral due to Jack Jr's future Christian rap beef, failing that a heart attack
DoD: December 12th 2020
Keto points: 10,000 horny bangladeshis

 

[Ira the Weatherman]

Are mashed potatoes keto friendly?

View attachment 1007300
This guy's stomach is amazing

View attachment 1007308

Wait,... isn't that for pastries, not potatoes?

This dude put in at least 8 tablespoons of butter (counting it as 3), over a cup of heavy cream, a pound of cheese and no wasabi into his "wasabi potatoes"
His review of the mashed potatoes: "I like this. This came out flawless."
His changes would be: Put twice as much cheese and buying wasabi paste.

Of course Jack, the man who procures gimmicky bullshit home shopping gadgets by the cartload, doesn't own an actually useful tool like a potato masher.

 

[FemalePresident]

Two things:

You were talking about Charles removing Jack's channel from Fish Hook. Now, I don't remember if Jack had Fish Hook on his featured channels, but I'm sure he had Gianna's Kitchen. And it seems like he removed it. Do you think things might have gone wrong between Jack and Charles and his family?

Also, wasn't Jack supposed to start a new Pizza Wars tour? What happened?

 

[Rod Dangerous]

For the sake of historic preservation, I will provide the board with a rundown of how things have gone through 10 weeks of Jack’s fantasy football league. Apologies to those that are part of the private discussion, as you are all aware of what is about to be written.

• Jack immediately handed all league-oriented responsibilities off to an associate of his, absolving himself from any administration and decision-making.
• The league’s rules and scoring settings are absurd, at least by my and several other Kiwis’ standards. Much like his Food Wars ratings, the scoring categories are heavily skewed.
• Prior to the draft taking place, it was already apparent to me that not everyone who signed up would be playing out the entire season, Jack included.
• Jack, naturally, filled his lineup with household name players, paying no mind to their declining levels of skill or overall impact in the fantasy football world.
• Four weeks into the season, Jack has yet to record a win. At this point, Jack mails it in, all but neglecting his roster’s immediate needs.
• Week 7: We defeat Jack’s team, 131–118.
• For the next several weeks, Jack’s team continues to float through the league, losing to teams abandoned by their managers. Jack’s team is solidly in last place with a 1–9 record.

And now we get to some juicy stuff:

• Jack’s co-commissioner uses his league credentials to aid Jack while also fixing his match with another team, ensuring himself victory. There was evidence of this happening in years prior, so we knew to be on the lookout for this sort of thing.
• Jack’s co-commissioner is called out on his lyin’, cheatin’ ways and immediately blocks and suspends Team Kiwi from interacting with and participating in league activities. In short, he silenced and banned us for calling him out on his improprieties.
• Jack sends an email to everyone involved in the league, informing everyone that this league is “for his fans” and it’s for fun, so to leave it alone.
• After discussing matters with the co-commissioner, who maintains his innocence despite all evidence pointing to the contrary, Team Kiwi is reinstated and allowed to see the season through.

TL;DR: Jack organized a league that he’s too lazy to operate, too lazy to participate in, and too lazy to control, and when his church-going pal of a co-commissioner was caught blatantly cheating, he chose to throw up his hands and silence and ban the whistleblower, not the person cheating. Classic Jack.

 

[Aaway]

Two things:

You were talking about Charles removing Jack's channel from Fish Hook. Now, I don't remember if Jack had Fish Hook on his featured channels, but I'm sure he had Gianna's Kitchen. And it seems like he removed it. Do you think things might have went wrong between Jack and Charles and his family?

Also, wasn't Jack supposed to start a new Pizza Wars tour? What happened?

i still think they went their separate ways due to jack being butthurt over comments being turned on and charles refusing to do fast food/sushi videos. but who knows, you might be on to something here. both of them have seemed pretty hesitant to talk about one another since the split

in regards to pizza wars, last i heard he was looking for someone to sponsor it and was asking people in the live chat if they knew any pizza place that would be willing to do so. i really hope it happens because jack and co. doing pizza wars in ny/nj would be absolute cringe and you know those mom and pop pie shop owners up there would not put up with jack's bullshit for a second

 

[FemalePresident]

This is a bit old. It's the first time I check the comments on one of her videos and I found this lol