🐮 Lolcow Timothy "TJ" Church / Cowlick - Failed Literotica Writer &/or Null's Best Friend

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Regardless, the package is a legitimate case. I concluded TJChurch being any real danger to me was as likely as hearing hide and Taiji play the full Art of Life. Therefore, I've never documented these purported actions of mine before I was obligated to delete them as off-topic spam, and I began to manually incinerate before he shifted to rippitydoo. I preferred to focus on his bashing threads and ban evasions since those were actually useful. Plus, I never thought I'd be sharing these stories outside of our community. I had no idea there would be anyone interested in hearing these stories.

'Tis true... The package referred to earlier in the thread earlier which was sent to me was a legitimate case containing the things I claimed.

Also, you "preferred to focus" on those things since they actually existed... Due to their having been done/created by "hell_kaiser" (poster of one of the posts you linked to in your post here tonight that I've now quoted)... While we're on the subject of bans, lets mention that "H_K" (as he has become known on those forums) is now posting as "(that name)_V2", due to his first username (& the only other he's known to have used when not admittedly hacking mine) being properly banned due to my honest, truthful reporting of his rule-violations.

Lastly, one final correction... While it may also be true you didn't know there would be anyone interested in these stories (though it's more correct to say they are interested in me, having also connected to my blogs & several other sites where I have been a member), that is why yu have come here; You (as many here) have a near-unhealthy obsession with me, & have acted within it on TWOO versions of "CHYOO" (as well as the separate Forums for each), and that is only a small portion of the list (while some here seem to laugh at my having found this place through a search for my own online usernames, you search for the names that are listed at that other forum far more-regularly than I do, doing so safely, knowing that nobody is otherwise thinking about you at all).
 
Wow. For the smartest guy on this forum, you sure like to make use of argumentum ad hominem.

Have you ever noticed that, like Chris, he doesn't seem to believe any of us are women, and therefore never makes similarly degrading references to women schlicking to his picture? He does seem oddly fixated on the idea of men here having erections, but I don't believe there's been a reference by him to female sexual arousal in this entire thread. Of course, in his Literotica incest threads, the sex is almost always coercive, so I don't think women's arousal is a thing that matters to his life at all. Delighted not to be his neighbor.
 
Have you ever noticed that, like Chris, he doesn't seem to believe any of us are women, and therefore never makes similarly degrading references to women schlicking to his picture? He does seem oddly fixated on the idea of men here having erections, but I don't believe there's been a reference by him to female sexual arousal in this entire thread. Of course, in his Literotica incest threads, the sex is almost always coercive, so I don't think women's arousal is a thing that matters to his life at all. Delighted not to be his neighbor.

TJ is a rapist!
 
Lastly, one final correction... While it may also be true you didn't know there would be anyone interested in these stories (though it's more correct to say they are interested in me, having also connected to my blogs & several other sites where I have been a member), that is why you have come here; You (as many here) have a near-unhealthy obsession with me, & have acted within it on TWO versions of "CHYOO" (as well as the separate Forums for each), and that is only a small portion of the list (while some here seem to laugh at my having found this place through a search for my own online usernames, you search for the names that are listed at that other forum far more-regularly than I do, doing so safely, knowing that nobody is otherwise thinking about you at all).
Can't you see that we love you, yet? :heart-full:
 
According to TJChurch, I found out he was diagnosed as a diabetic and sent him a package containing a box of chocolates, a loaded handgun, and a card that said "Pick one" signed by my username.
That's the stupidest alleged threat that I've ever heard of.
Also, keep the confidence in the fact that the poster made the story up.
'Tis true... The package referred to earlier in the thread earlier which was sent to me was a legitimate case containing the things I claimed.
Huh? This is like playing Phoenix Wright.
 
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'Tis true... The package referred to earlier in the thread earlier which was sent to me was a legitimate case containing the things I claimed.

Also, you "preferred to focus" on those things since they actually existed

Which is it now?

While we're on the subject of bans, lets mention that "H_K" (as he has become known on those forums) is now posting as "(that name)_V2", due to his first username (& the only other he's known to have used when not admittedly hacking mine) being properly banned due to my honest, truthful reporting of his rule-violations.

No he hasn't. A banished author's profile on LitErotica looks like this, this, or this, not like hell_kaiser. Or if you prefer, a banished forum page looks like this, this, or this - no contact information, no profile information, and a title of "Loves Spam" - not like hell_kaiser who's listed as "Virgin" and has a PM option. Cwcki community, if the links require registration to LitErotica, say the word and I'll screenshot the pages. If I had to guess, hell_kaiser forgot his password and isn't receiving a reset email, and that's assuming it actually is the same person. Regardless, hell_kaiser is not banished from LitErotica. Get your facts straight before you start lying.
 
Which is it now?



No he hasn't. A banished author's profile on LitErotica looks like this, this, or this[/url, not like hell_kaiser. Or if you prefer, a banished forum page looks like this, this, or this - no contact information, no profile information, and a title of "Loves Spam" - not like hell_kaiser who's listed as "Virgin" and has a PM option. Cwcki community, if the links require registration to LitErotica, say the word and I'll screenshot the pages. If I had to guess, hell_kaiser forgot his password and isn't receiving a reset email, and that's assuming it actually is the same person. Regardless, hell_kaiser is not banished from LitErotica. Get your facts straight before you start lying.

He's not going to do that, you know this.
 
I kinda formatted my last post incorrectly, and I apologize for that everyone. Let me try this again.
*****
Oh, hey; TJ's back. Sorry I haven't been able to play, TJ; I hope that you understand that every once in a while a guy's gotta enjoy a night with his girl, holding hands as we watch the brutish rampage of an angry dragon. (No, that's not sexual innuendo, you sickly prune! I smack you!)

Goodness, I've missed a lot! Let's start at the beginning.
Sorry, but I actually know this.

Proof?! Without me, this thread doesn't exist. (Never mind I was not a member here when it began, or in contact with any of you. Now, people are posting to the thread while I remain gone for days, or even weeks, despite the same people claiming that me leaving would cause the thread to disappear.) On top of that, people who haven't had any contact with me in months on other Forums are coming here, posting either falsified versions of our past experiences or recollections of experiences with me that in their entirety never happened.

Also, one member here posted a few dozen things to my profile without me responding even one time in between, & another one continued a conversation with me in which he claimed we had no further reason to continue contact. (Getting an E-mail about that is the only reason I came back today.)

Perception can be influenced by what we desire, good sir. Keep that in mind. I wouldn't expect a writer to completely understand the scientific method, but using it for discerning events like yours is quite helpful. I would like an account as to what actually happened, then. Didn't think of that, did you?

And, as you can probably figure out, considering your divine intellect, I was the one who sent you all those links. It's my way of testing your intelligence against mine. Here's my ultimatum: If you figure out my message, I will leave the thread completely. If you cannot, then I stay and you leave.

I gave you nothing to discuss at the start of the thread, yet it began anyway. The fact is logical reasoning can not explain why this thread ever began, let alone why it continues.

Sure you did; your behavior at Literotica and, Chyoo was it? Those were what brought you to our attention. And then a few people decided to get together and say "Wow, what a dingus." However, it didn't last very long until you came along to feed the fire with your own body. Common procedure with dealing with naysayers and trolls alike.

Because people on this place continue to contact me. (I already posted that getting an E-mail about someone continuing a conversation with me & yet doing so by saying we had no reason to contact each other anymore was the reason I came back.)

Hyperion, feeling's mutual, but none of us have any control over the other's existence. On the other hand, Surtur, I've posted several times in this thread that the second it leaves the site, so shall I.

Then why do you try to influence what we do here? Why do you care, if what we do has no impact on your existence? And before you tell me that's not what you said, it is an implication that comes along with the statement. If we have no say in your life, then what we do has no impact. And with that in mind, your own words paint a picture of futility.

"If you hadn't... you would've been forgotten about it." How am I not getting it?! Perhaps b/c there are two subjects in that sentence?! Also, I don't care about your policies; Things change.

“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye[a] when you have a log in your own? 4 How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye?" (Matthew 7:3-4).

(Not sure why that got bold up there, but I think it serves the purpose anyway.)

Really?! I hadn't noticed... Wish all the jokes that post about me in this thread could say the same about themselevs (though I suspect some of them have been done, so long as we count their interactions with each other).

Actually, I dont believe myself to be any special kind of a thinker On a related topic, however, you might call me a "concrete-creating" thinker, since I'm sure the truth is many of you get hard looking at pics/gifs of me, my posts (here or on other sites), etc... Probably only adds to your reaction I mainly post here (when I do at all) late at night.

Fools never do. Believe me, I wrote the book, stood under the tree in a lightning storm, and believed the call from Microsoft; I know these things.

But back on topic. You are some kind of special thinker- mankind is recognized within several categories, none of which are bad by the way. Your own analysis is bogus because the category you used doesn't exist. I looked. And really, I actually kinda considered your reason for being around late at night were because you were a vampire, like what my friends say about my college roommate.

'Tis true... The package referred to earlier in the thread earlier which was sent to me was a legitimate case containing the things I claimed.

Also, you "preferred to focus" on those things since they actually existed... Due to their having been done/created by "hell_kaiser" (poster of one of the posts you linked to in your post here tonight that I've now quoted)... While we're on the subject of bans, lets mention that "H_K" (as he has become known on those forums) is now posting as "(that name)_V2", due to his first username (& the only other he's known to have used when not admittedly hacking mine) being properly banned due to my honest, truthful reporting of his rule-violations.

Lastly, one final correction... While it may also be true you didn't know there would be anyone interested in these stories (though it's more correct to say they are interested in me, having also connected to my blogs & several other sites where I have been a member), that is why yu have come here; You (as many here) have a near-unhealthy obsession with me, & have acted within it on TWOO versions of "CHYOO" (as well as the separate Forums for each), and that is only a small portion of the list (while some here seem to laugh at my having found this place through a search for my own online usernames, you search for the names that are listed at that other forum far more-regularly than I do, doing so safely, knowing that nobody is otherwise thinking about you at all).

Oh, we believe you completely, doll. Which did you choose, by the way? Do tell, dahling, I'm all ears.

Not true- I have a girlfriend, college buddies, and a loving family. I'm sure that everyone on this site has a somewhat similar story. That's probably your problem, sir; you have nobody in your life. You poor, poor thing. :heart-full:

Just. Translate. What. I. Said.

If it makes you feel any better, I looked up what you said.
 
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I don't really have anything insightful to say about TJ's latest incoherent rambling so here's some fanart I made instead.

Kczgbak.jpg

tOxGimk.jpg

GPhf9ro.jpg


Sleep deprivation has driven me to do strange things.
 
I do like how it never occurred to TJ to report to the police the fact that someone sent him a LOADED HANDGUN in the mail. He could have had the sender jailed easily, but instead chose... To shame him online?
 
I do like how it never occurred to TJ to report to the police the fact that someone sent him a LOADED HANDGUN in the mail. He could have had the sender jailed easily, but instead chose... To shame him online?
Is it legal to possess a handgun you received in the mail? Aren't there forms to fill out, even in the American midwest?
 
Hell, is it even legal to send a loaded handgun through the mail?
No. Firearms have to be unloaded for interstate transport. Also a loaded gun is considered hazardous material and hazardous material is not allowed to be sent through the mail. Sending a loaded firearm through the mail would be a federal offense.
 
No. Firearms have to be unloaded for interstate transport. Also a loaded gun is considered hazardous material and hazardous material is not allowed to be sent through the mail. Sending a loaded firearm through the mail would be a federal offense.

Figured. I wonder how TJ's going to explain that?
 
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