UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

View image on Twitter


spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[AssignedEva]

Great for nausea, not much cop for anything else.

Ginger nuts are better for nausea. The only thing a Rich Tea is good for is acting as a coaster.

 

[SirCliveSinclairdabbing]

To be fair to kofi the whey protein content of British made value range biscuits is excellent.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

three arrested at the al quds march in London, not heard much else. thought more would have happened.

They have been given usual free reign despite being told not to have the march at all. Main reason things did not have is the police used the Thames to keep them and counter protestors separated


Vylan's back singing his same one hit wonder.

https://archive.ph/79jOB

Bobby Vylan has led chants of “death, death to the IDF” at the Al Quds demonstration.
Thousands of pro-regime protesters gathered on the south side of the River Thames at Albert Embankment from 1pm on Sunday.
Bobby Vylan, the lead vocalist of rap duo Bob Vylan, took to the stage at the static protest to lead the crowd in chants of “death, death to the IDF”.
Addressing the crowd of several thousand, Bobby Vylan said: “Here we are today as a community in an attempt to remain human and let this Government know that despite all of their scare tactics, for every doctor they harass with repeated arrests; for every musician they attempt to ban from playing shows; for every pensioner with a placard they bundle into a police van; for every political prisoner they hope starves to death; we are here unbreakable and human standing always with the people of Gaza.
“And I would like to conclude with death, death, death to the IDF.”

Avon and Somerset Police investigated the performer last year after he chanted the same slogan from the stage at Glastonbury. The force cleared him after deciding his comments did not meet the criminal threshold for prosecution.
A Met Police spokesman said it was aware of the chants, but added: “When this language had been used previously, we sought advice from the CPS, who determined that there would be insufficient evidence to take a case forward.”
A Scotland Yard spokesman later posted on social media: “We are aware of chanting made by a speaker at the Al Quds protest and will be investigating. We recognise the concern footage and chanting like this causes, particularly with London’s Jewish communities.”

Officers arrested three people at the demonstration, one for showing support for a proscribed organisation, one for dangerous driving and a third for threatening and abusive behaviour.
Meanwhile, police also detained a man who had been carrying a banner that read “Boom, boom Tel Aviv”, thought to be a celebration of Iran’s missile attacks in Israel.
Moments before officers led him away, the man told reporters: “I support the bombing of Israel…”


Other pro-regime signs were on display, with one banner claiming that the “Epstein regime” murdered 168 schoolchildren in Iran.
At one table at the protest, an autobiography written by Ali Khamenei, the former supreme leader, called Cell No 14, was on sale for £17.

A van was parked up with a screen showing footage of US and Israeli strikes, funerals and an AI image of Donald Trump, Benjamin Netanyahu and Jeffrey Epstein lined up shoulder to shoulder.
Another person carried a sign that read: “Iran has every right to defend themselves against the Epstein-pedo ring.”

Meanwhile, counter-protesters gathered on the opposite side of the river, at Millbank, near Westminster, for a demonstration organised by Stop The Hate.
It is the first time that the Metropolitan Police has used the Thames to keep opposing sides apart during large-scale protests.
At the counter-protest, one man was seen holding an Israeli flag, while another waved a flag reading “Hamas is terrorist”.
A speaker from the Islamic Human Rights Commission addressed the pro-Iran crowd as they waved Iranian and Palestinian flags and placards displaying Khamenei’s face.

​

The speaker said: “Let us pay our condolences to the great martyr, the shahid, the reason we are here today: Shahid Khamenei.
“We wear it on our hearts, we wear it on our chests, we wear it on our sleeves, we are not scared of what these people say against us.”

He then led the crowd in a chant of “marg bar Amrika, marg bar Israel”, which means “death to America, death to Israel”.
The Al Quds event is taking place despite Shabana Mahmood, the Home Secretary, banning a planned march.
More than 12,000 protesters and counter-protesters were expected at two static demonstrations, which cannot be legally prevented from taking place.

The Met’s Marine Support Unit patrolled the waters between the two groups and more than 1,000 officers, including some from other forces, were on duty to prevent trouble flaring.
Lambeth Bridge was closed to members of the public with only emergency vehicles allowed access.

​

The Al Quds march takes place every year in support of Palestinians and is usually held at the end of Ramadan.
But Sir Mark Rowley, the Met Commissioner, took the unusual step of asking the Home Secretary to ban the march, citing concern over the high risk of serious public disorder.
Ms Mahmood agreed because of the “scale of the protest and multiple counter-protests, in the context of the ongoing conflict in the Middle East”.
Scotland Yard said there were at least four counter-protests planned, including groups that did not necessarily agree with each other on all issues.

In a post on X, the Met said on Sunday afternoon: “Lambeth Bridge remains closed to keep both groups apart. Officers have made three arrests, one for showing support for a proscribed organisation, one for dangerous driving and a third for threatening and abusive behaviour.”
In a statement explaining why the Met had applied for the march to be banned, a spokesman said: “The threshold to ban a protest is high and we do not take this decision lightly. This is the first time we have used this power since 2012.”

And of course the people behind this have had about half a million of tax payer's money

https://archive.ph/ZAWdZ

A charity which funds the group behind the banned pro-Iran “hate march” has received at least £450,000 in taxpayer-funded donations, The Telegraph can reveal.
The Islamic Human Rights Commission (IHRC) Trust has been recognised by HMRC for Gift Aid, which means it can claim an extra 25p from the Government for every £1 it receives in donations.
Accounts submitted by the trust to the Charity Commission show that it has claimed £458,500 in Gift Aid since 2020. It is under investigation by the watchdog for funding an event where “inflammatory” statements were apparently made.
The group, whose spokesman defended Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, the late supreme leader of Iran, as a “man of principle”, organised what MPs and peers described as a “hate march” before it was banned this week by Shabana Mahmood, the Home Secretary.
The IHRC Trust is one of four charities with alleged Iranian links that are recognised by HMRC for Gift Aid and identified in a report on Iranian influence in the UK by Lord Walney, the former independent adviser to the Government on political violence.

​

Lord Walney called for tougher rules to prevent charities from receiving Gift Aid while they are under investigation.
He said: “The Telegraph’s investigation shows that substantial sums of taxpayers’ money are involved and are going to potentially inappropriate organisations because of both the weakness and slowness of the Government’s regulatory regime.
“I think the evidence against the IHRC is strong but whether or not they are found in breach, it cannot be right that investigations can drag on for years, and that organisations can get the full benefit of charity status while they are being investigated for very serious issues.
“In serious cases related to extremism, the default should be that privileges such as claiming Gift Aid are suspended while investigations are carried out, and investigations should be completed much faster than they are.
“The Government’s admission this week that the system is too weak and its commitment to give extra powers to tackle extremism is welcome and overdue. But the test is how quickly and how effectively a new regime can be put in place.”
The Charity Commission is investigating the IHRC Trust along with two other Iranian-linked charities over its funding of an unidentified event where alleged “inflammatory” statements were made.
The watchdog also raised concerns over “its involvement in publications made and events organised by a non-charitable company which receives funding from IHRC Trust”.

Believes in a single state​

In the year to June 2025, the trust awarded grants of nearly £520,000 out of its total income of £642,254 to IHRC Ltd
In response to queries by The Telegraph, it said it was a human rights organisation but did not hide the fact that it believed “Israel is a racist, colonialist, apartheid enterprise that needs to be dismantled and replaced with a single state that represents Muslims, Christians and Jews”.
The group’s annual Al Quds day march was banned by Ms Mahmood over concerns that it could provoke serious public disorder at the height of the Middle East war, with up to five counter-demonstrations by opponents of the Iranian regime planned.
The IHRC will instead hold a “static” protest, which neither the Government nor police have powers to ban. However, the Met Police have placed restrictions on the location and timing of the rallies so that the River Thames separates Al Quds Day demonstrators from anti-Iranian protesters
The pro-Iranian Sunday event forms part of an international day of demonstrations that Ruhollah Khomeini, a former supreme leader of Iran, established in 1979 after the revolution.
There have been arrests and clashes with the police at previous marches, while the Israeli flag has been burnt, and before Hezbollah’s proscription in 2019, the terror group’s flag was waved.
The IHRC Trust says on its website that it has provided grants to IHRC Ltd for “various charitable projects undertaken on behalf of the charity”.
IHRC LTD said the entities are legally distinct with separate management, and described any suggestions of improper linkage as confused and factually inaccurate. It said that in its 28-year history, it has had no links with any state.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Moscow Mule

Honestly I think if you're getting drunk on mother's day because of mother's day then that's just going to make you sadder. Vodka is also just cringe, drinking vodka as anything other than a 16 year old at a house party is just wrong. Why would you drink vodka when gin is just objectively an improved version?

Ginger nuts are better for nausea

Flat pepsi is better.

 

[Vesperus]

I suppose a drawback of this approach is it wouldn't account for biscuit structural integrity. I think we can all agree if your biscuit falls off and collapses into mush, this both doesn't count as "absorbing" the tea (because now you've got to fish it out with a teaspoon) and also is embarrassing.

Possibly amend @Otterly's 2 second dunk to time=t, where t is the time for the biscuit to collapse minus 1 second (or thereabouts).

On the subject of dunking biscuits, what absolute lunatic tries dunking a Club or a Penguin?

There's an art I learned in NZ with Timtams (which are basically Penguins) where you nibble off a corner, nibble off the opposite corner, then use it as a straw to suck to the tea up.
The art lies in stopping and eating the tea-soaked biscuit in one mouthful just before it explodes into an unholy mess of melted chocolate and biscuit porridge.

 

[Otterly]

you nibble off a corner, nibble off the opposite corner, then use it as a straw to suck to the tea up.

You used to be able to do this with Spiras, before they stopped making them.
It’s also possible to use a kit-kat this way.

 

[SirCliveSinclairdabbing]

You used to be able to do this with Spiras, before they stopped making them.
It’s also possible to use a kit-kat this way.

I knew the spiras technique with Fanta but the kitkats are news to me

 

[The Green Man]

I knew the spiras technique with Fanta but the kitkats are news to me

Using chocolate to suck up fanta just sounds like aids to me, But then I don't have a sweet tooth, HOWEVER....Jaffa Cakes and Jammie Dodgers, the best biscuits. Even Yanks on Youtube reactor videos enjoy 'em.

 

[ApeBass]

Do pink wafers belong in a biscuit selection box? Are they really biscuits?

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Do pink wafers belong in a biscuit selection box? Are they really biscuits?

They go soft if you leave them out so yes.

 

[Overly Serious]

Why would you drink vodka when gin is just objectively an improved version?

Someone is not heeding his Hogarth...

Using chocolate to suck up fanta just sounds like aids to me, But then I don't have a sweet tooth, HOWEVER....Jaffa Cakes and Jammie Dodgers, the best biscuits. Even Yanks on Youtube reactor videos enjoy 'em.

Just as with Bourbons, it is hard to eat Jaffa cakes without trying to get all the chocolate layer off without damaging the rest, then peeling off the marmalade bit, then eating the sponge at last. None of the parts separately are as nice as eating them together, and yet there's s great satisfaction in the dissection. This isn't just me, surely?

Jaffa Cakes however, are not biscuits, as determined by a court of law when the dastardly UK government tried to put a tax on them. (Biscuits are regarded as a luxury and can be taxed, whilst cake is classed as purely food and therefore essential. Somethig I will not dispute).

Do pink wafers belong in a biscuit selection box? Are they really biscuits?

I vote yea!

 

[teriyakiburns]

Two students die in university meningitis outbreak

Kent university is suffering a fairly big meningitis outbreak.

For the digestion, Kent has about 35% (as of last figures I could find) BAME students - Black and Minority Ethnic - which in real terms means probably a quarter of the student body are likely to be some form of Indian, Pakistani, or Chinese. Now, I'm not saying they're all filthy buggers who wallow in their own filth and generate endless novel forms of disease that they pass on to everyone around them. I'm writing it. There's a difference.

 

[Otterly]

there's s great satisfaction in the dissection.

All biscuits that can be dissected orally should be.

 

[SirCliveSinclairdabbing]

All biscuits that can be dissected orally should be.

Cake dilemma.
Battenberg also true.
Trifle = no
Jaffa cakes = burn in hell

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

on the topic of biscuits when one breaks off into your tea, do you try to save it quickly with a spoon or accept your fate and hold your nose and take the baby vomit looking residue at the bottom of the mug like a shot of some odious liqueur only seen at student parties?

I knew a manky bastard when I was younger who used to dip buttered toast into his tea. Think he's a junkie now.

For the digestion, Kent has about 35% (as of last figures I could find) BAME students

They can tick boxes but they "Kent" survive the semester. (shepherd's crook pulls me off the stage)

 

[Otterly]

when one breaks off into your tea

Amateur hour here… you have to have the reactions of a mongoose

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

Amateur hour here… you have to have the reactions of a mongoose

if you're too fast it breaks the biscuit up more though. extreme care needs to be taken to not compromise the structural integrity.

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

Ginger nuts are better for nausea. The only thing a Rich Tea is good for is acting as a coaster.

I prefer ginger pills for that. Actual ginger biscuits are too much flavour when I’m feeling nauseous. Rich tea are that perfect blandness and dryness that settles your stomach. It’s either that of a Farley’s rusk, and they get too gummy for my liking.

Honestly I think if you're getting drunk on mother's day because of mother's day then that's just going to make you sadder. Vodka is also just cringe, drinking vodka as anything other than a 16 year old at a house party is just wrong. Why would you drink vodka when gin is just objectively an improved version?

Flat pepsi is better.

Absolutely not. Vodka just isn’t served correctly in the U.K. The idea of having it sitting at room temperature in optics behind the bar is an affront to the joy of a good vodka, which should be from the freezer, neat, and downed in one shot. The only time I’ve ever enjoyed it mixed was bison grass vodka mixed with apple juice. Tastes like apple pie. Deffo a student drink, though.

on the topic of biscuits when one breaks off into your tea, do you try to save it quickly with a spoon or accept your fate and hold your nose and take the baby vomit looking residue at the bottom of the mug like a shot of some odious liqueur only seen at student parties?

I knew a manky bastard when I was younger who used to dip buttered toast into his tea. Think he's a junkie now.


They can tick boxes but they "Kent" survive the semester. (shepherd's crook pulls me off the stage)

You need more practice if you’re allowing your biscuits to fall into your tea. That’s an amateur move. However, if at all possible you should sacrifice the rest of the tea and make a new one. There’s no coming back from that. The sludge at the bottom will make you feel sick.

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

You need more practice if you’re allowing your biscuits to fall into your tea. That’s an amateur move.

I switched from chocolate digestives to normal ones and there's been some teething issues.

you should sacrifice the rest of the tea and make a new one.

I'm too tight for that. I'm the type of person who reuses my teabags. cheap shite lidl own make ones too

 

[Kofi Drinka]

on the topic of biscuits when one breaks off into your tea, do you try to save it quickly with a spoon or accept your fate and hold your nose and take the baby vomit looking residue at the bottom of the mug like a shot of some odious liqueur only seen at student parties?

You go in with your fingers and accept the burn! Don't let it escape and sink to the bottom.

No science equipment allowed in the test. If we're doing this we're doing it right. A mug, tea, milk, 2 sugars. Dip the biscuit in once for a long dunk 1-2 seconds. Pull it out so it drains a bit then immediately 1 in and out dunk before you stick it in your gob.

Thank you for the fat people thread suggestion but I don't need it. Easy enough to put double the veg on the plate and a bit less of everything else. And the springs here now (oh no it isn't! Oh yes it is!) so it's a good time to go enjoy the country air rather than being a miserable sod on internet forums.