💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 902 58.0%

  • Total voters
    1,556
So Fatty admits to being an asshole online and nobody is surprised except him.

No. He's pretending to admit to being an asshole online because he thinks that's what satire is. It's confusing because the only thing Jack is known for is being an asshole online. He truly believes that his vocation at the shit-stained zoo exhibit he built for himself is "famous, important person"; and that his audience exists for reasons other than people finding him easy to hate.
 
First, I read this as "morning movement" and was hoping it wasn't going to be Fatty talking about Fatty having problems shitting.

"I ask people for recommendations hey can you tell me a good lawyer or plumber or lawn care, oh I don't want to pay a lot of money I always say that because most people want to pay the top dollar possible"

In what fucking universe is Fatty living in? People ask for recommendations for one of two reasons: they want a referral for a service that is known to be good, or they want to find something cheap, that's it. No one ever fucking asks for a recommendation for the most expensive plumber or landscaper, because you can just look around online and find someone with the worst rates easily. I'm really not sure if this was his idea of sarcasm going along with the rest of the video where he's whining about what other people post on facebook, but the entire thing is insane.

 
Jack is attempting sarcasm when he impersonates someone asking for the most expensive plumber or lawn care; because he's trying to highlight that people are unnecessarily disclaiming their low budget when it's a foregone conclusion that no one wants to overpay.

Of course, he's too retarded to convey this unambiguously. Some people just aren't cut out for being listened to; and Jack is a fifty seven year old miscarriage.

Jack is a good few rungs below Matthew Perry when it comes to attempting sarcasm:

 
ack is attempting sarcasm when he impersonates someone asking for the most expensive plumber or lawn care; because he's trying to highlight that people are unnecessarily disclaiming their low budget when it's a foregone conclusion that no one wants to overpay.
I guess he might have been doing that? It's hard to tell because of how fucking retarded he is, and sounding borderline coherent.
 
I was thinking about this today, but it's insane how fatty is surviving all these strokes while Simply Sara fucking died from 1 bowel blockage.
 
I'd not mind having this soup. As a chilly slurpy slurp chicken soup. Not a meal.
IMG_4933.webp


This is also a damning indictment of Jack's own cooking given he made "fresh" chicken soup back in his Cum for Dudes Month. Oh, and has done it multiple times. He's openly admitting SysCo slop is better than what he cooks.
Okay, there’s no doubt in my mind that he has dementia. He’s forgotten the time where he made a surprisingly decent chicken noodle soup. Were it not made by Jack’s hands in his kitchen, I’d have definitely gotten myself a bowl.

Obligatory palate cleanser:


Her cold disdain and lack of fucks to give is alluring, if not a tad bit sexy.
There really is a Seinfeld quote for everything.
IMG_4934.jpeg


He probably doesn't even vote anyway. He's too fat to vote.
He’s unironically the ideal person to take advantage of vote-by-mail. But, like he did with AI, he’d obviously bitch about how evil it is until he realizes that it’d enable him to be even more uselessly lazy than he already is.


If Hammy is smart she will just lease a boat and bury his fat ass at sea with the other ocean mammals
Why not a good, old-fashioned pyre?

*Of course, it’d have to be done in a barren landscape under fire department supervision to eliminate the risk of wildfire. Winds would have to be taken into account as well- can’t have toxic fumes blowing into populated areas.
 
I'm performing my periodic check asking if technology has advanced to the point of prompting an app to edit entire Youtube videos to give Jack increasingly negroid features as he grows more disabled (his current output, for example, would land somewhere between the Louis Armstrong and California Raisin stages of impairment).

If not: Being able to edit Scott Steiner entering the frame to point to Jack and yell "He's FAT" is a different benchmark of tech innovation I'm living for.
 
Why not a good, old-fashioned pyre?

*Of course, it’d have to be done in a barren landscape under fire department supervision to eliminate the risk of wildfire. Winds would have to be taken into account as well- can’t have toxic fumes blowing into populated areas.
They can do it over at Nemo's Point
 
I'll admit that I actually quite like the soup, salad, and breadsticks deal at Olive Garden for a decently-balanced inexpensive lunch, but somehow the soup always looks better when I get it than it did in that video. I wouldn't say people "go crazy" for it either, but I imagine my social circle is quite different from Jack and Tammy's.
 
When Jack insists that people "go crazy" for some promotional goyslop, what he means is that he imagines all the people who can't stand to be around him sharing his priorities in the course of disrupting other patrons' meals through filming themselves overreacting to food (as he does). The guy has less shame at the dinner table than the family from Texas Chain Saw Massacre.
 
Today's Morning Mushmouth - Jack rambles incoherently about AI.

Morning Moment - AI concerns:

 
Today's Morning Mushmouth - Jack rambles incoherently about AI.

Morning Moment - AI concerns:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=yrq5HmOMTaU
This here is peak boomer bullshit.

He's treating AI like it's fucking Skynet or something menacing. AI right now is a toy. It's the illusion of thought. It's an LLM that parses information and spits out an answer based on some algorithm. It's not the end of the world nor is it dangerous.

But then anybody who listens to Fatty as being the voice of reason is an idiot as well so it's like the blind leading the stupid.
 
Why not a good, old-fashioned pyre?

*Of course, it’d have to be done in a barren landscape under fire department supervision to eliminate the risk of wildfire. Winds would have to be taken into account as well- can’t have toxic fumes blowing into populated areas.
Why not just throw him into the water the next time Texas floods? He'd be a nice artificial damn. Would stop the floods in hours

"It's not as piping hot as it usually is, which is good. I always burn my mouth"

Jack happy he no longer has to wait a couple minutes to git fud in mowf. If you don't cool the food for him he's gonna put it in his mouth no matter what.

Your waiter should whip out his dong (with his right hand) and push it into your "piping hot soup" balls deep to show you what a bitch you are.
 
He's treating AI like it's fucking Skynet or something menacing. AI right now is a toy. It's the illusion of thought. It's an LLM that parses information and spits out an answer based on some algorithm. It's not the end of the world nor is it dangerous.
>keeps acting like ai is skynet
>uses said ai to make thumbnails, music, and recipes for videos anyway
 
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