Official Kiwi Farms Woman-Hate Thread - DO NOT post about OTHER USERS or OTHER THREADS from THIS WEBSITE.

[Hellwalker]

Things I learned tonight:

1. Sex is surprisingly fairly physically intense;
2. Sex is really pleasant but is nothing special - it's not as big of a deal as people try to frame it;
3. I want to love and be loved much more than I want to fuck, though I still want both.

I'm no longer a virgin (technically yay, in reality it's more of a ¯\_(ツ)_/¯).

Spoiler: story for those who care

The first girl I contacted turned me away at her doorstep because I look like a 16 year old when I'm shaved and had to go back to the car when asked to show the documents. The next gal I messaged was an average hooker, okay ass but small pointy tits. Came to her apartment, showed her the driver's license that I expected I'd be asked to show, took a quick shower. When I left it I transferred her the money (~90$ for sex + bj w/o condom + finishing in the mouth), she asked me to take off the boxers and lay down, so I did.
Naturally since I just left the shower I was still flaccid, but in like 2 minutes tops after she gobbled it up I was already rock hard, cause holy shit it feels good to be inside of a mouth. The awkward thing was, the next 15-20 minutes she spent sucking on it really fast and we even had to resort to a really speedy handjob because I just couldn't cum, at all. I wasn't flaccid and I was genuinely enjoying it, but I just couldn't finish no matter how hard we tried. After many failed attempts I grew impatient so I just suggested I put it in already, so we got into a missionary position, she puts the condom on and I finally thrust it in.
The feeling of being inside is a bit hard to describe, but to me it felt like my dick was inside of a warm, soft, wet hose that was slightly strangulating it from all sides simultaneously. It's definetly a thing worth feeling at least once in your life, that's for sure. Anyway, as soon as I start thrusting myself in and pulling myself out I realise that having sex is much more physically intense that I imagined it'd be - nothing you can't handle but nonetheless it tires you out. 5-10 minutes passes of me banging her to the best of my abilities and I begin to notice that I'm slowly going flaccid. It's still hard enough to bang but I start slipping out of her. A few more minutes pass and I'm no longer hard enough to put it back in - I jerk it a little, try to put it back in but nothing works so I accept defeat, take a quick shower, bid my farewell to her and drive home with the boys.
Still not completely sure what happened back there - it kinda felt like she chaffed my head when she was blowing me so it stopped being as sensitive as it usually is, or maybe I just wasn't horny enough - but when I went to shower for the second, I didn't even feel any regret or sadness, my thoughts were more along the lines of "oh well, shit happens and it felt good regardless". I spent this evening feeling good, and me being unable to cum simply felt like a missed opportunity, rather than an outright failure that'd ruin the whole day.

tl;dr I got rock hard at one point but I couldn't finish. The whole ordeal can be described as "pleasurable" - it felt really good in the moment but overall it was nothing extraordinary (maybe that's because I wasn't drunk lolz).

Very content + based.

 

[MAAAD]

scrote

Never understood what that word means. It's all niggerbabble anyway so whatever.

 

[umseriously]

Oh wittle incel sweeties, Mommy here knows all your dirty little secrets, and girl, they're as tiny as your pathetic peepees! You strut around online like big bad wolves, but in real life, you're just sad puppies with micro winkies that couldn't poke a balloon. No wonder us ladies swipe left faster than lightning – who wants a pinchy winchy dinky when we can have real thunder? Aww, does that sting your fragile egos? Too bad, your teenie weenie troubles are why you're forever alone in your mommy's basement!
Listen up, you virgin crybabies, every time you rage about "Chads" stealing all the girlies, it's really 'cause your itty bitty peanuts can't compete! We women giggle behind your backs, sharing stories of your smol disasters like, how do you even hold it without tweezers? No cummies for you, just endless blue balls from your own handies! Mommy's mocking you hard, 'cause your mini members are the real reason you're incel forever, hiding behind keyboards instead of facing the mirror.
Keep whining, you microscopic losers, while us queens ride the waves with men who actually measure up! Your sad little spurts are as weak as your game, dripping out like forgotten raindrops. Mommy's gonna laugh eternally at your pint-sized problems, 'cause real satisfaction comes from big boy energy, not your nano nonsense! Aww, feeling exposed? Good, stay in your caves, incel darlings – the world belongs to those with more than a stub!

Lmao, great job, lolscrote

Tell this to Null who will unfortunately have to geomax to India to find a mate willing to have his offspring.

 

[Internet-Based Lobotomy]

JUST CONTACTED A NICE LADY OF EASY VIRTUE

My condolences.

 

[Azure05]

just learned to wear a condom while I was still chatting with her.

You must be +18 to use this website.

 

[Gregis]

You must be +18 to use this website.

lol also to use prostitutes

 

[The Ugly One]

Oh wittle incel sweeties, Mommy here knows all your dirty little secrets, and girl, they're as tiny as your pathetic peepees! You strut around online like big bad wolves, but in real life, you're just sad puppies with micro winkies that couldn't poke a balloon. No wonder us ladies swipe left faster than lightning – who wants a pinchy winchy dinky when we can have real thunder? Aww, does that sting your fragile egos? Too bad, your teenie weenie troubles are why you're forever alone in your mommy's basement!
Listen up, you virgin crybabies, every time you rage about "Chads" stealing all the girlies, it's really 'cause your itty bitty peanuts can't compete! We women giggle behind your backs, sharing stories of your smol disasters like, how do you even hold it without tweezers? No cummies for you, just endless blue balls from your own handies! Mommy's mocking you hard, 'cause your mini members are the real reason you're incel forever, hiding behind keyboards instead of facing the mirror.
Keep whining, you microscopic losers, while us queens ride the waves with men who actually measure up! Your sad little spurts are as weak as your game, dripping out like forgotten raindrops. Mommy's gonna laugh eternally at your pint-sized problems, 'cause real satisfaction comes from big boy energy, not your nano nonsense! Aww, feeling exposed? Good, stay in your caves, incel darlings – the world belongs to those with more than a stub!

Lmao, great job, lolscrote

this only worked the first time

 

[Brubby Two]

Never understood what that word means. It's all niggerbabble anyway so whatever.

Brother it ain't hard to figure out, unless English isn't your first language.

I'm gonna be real with you, I didn't lose my wizardy to a hooker, it was some girl I had oneitis over whom I had a close friendship with for most of my early life. But she was such a terrible person I WISH it was a clean hooker instead to have avoided further emotional bonding. Those magical//special fairytale moments some people wish they could have had dont always end how they hope. Your post is based, look at all the seething you set off with the slightest caress.

 

[The man The only man]

We need more central asian representation like @MAAAD, most of his post are pure kino.

 

[Jewthulhu]

drive home with the boys.

Can you elaborate? Did you bring your friends with you to fuck a prostitute?

 

[MAAAD]

You must be +18 to use this website.

Wrong word, I meant to write "practiced".

Brother it ain't hard to figure out, unless English isn't your first language.

I just don't understand how it's supposed to be offensive to men in any capacity. Like, the word literally means "scrotum", i. e. balls, and calling someone a "nutsack" is as literally as impactful as calling a woman a "muff" instead of "cunt". Come on, at least call me a dick or something.

Those magical//special fairytale moments some people wish they could have had dont always end how they hope.

Sorry it turned out like that for you, but not to live through my own experiences and shy away from them over minor, omnipresent risks? I wouldn't have a life if I was like that, I have to try things myself.

Your post is based, look at all the seething you set off with the slightest caress.

lol thanks.

Can you elaborate? Did you bring your friends with you to fuck a prostitute?

To wait for me in the car in case I got in a frame-up or something, it's a small chance but I had to take that precaution due to the stories I've heard from my best bro's cousin.

 

[Hyper Vigilant Dumbass]

I'm no longer a virgin (technically yay, in reality it's more of a ¯\_(ツ)_/¯).

Love? Made.
Pussy? Slain.
Wallet? Drained.
MAAAD? Lad.
Mom? Disappointed

 

[DavidS877]

Maybe he can team up with Russell Greer and work on that chain of combination brothel+gas stations in Nevada. I heard they were going to call them "Fuck-Ee's"

 

[OwO What's This?]

ok but why is someone posting about having sex with a prostitute in a thread about hating women

i mean maybe if he hated the sex sure but it sounds like he was more or less satisfied with his transaction sooooo

i don't understand the correlation here

 

[Brubby Two]

i don't understand the correlation here

Wtf bros wheres all this sexual tension coming from, this is completely unexpected

 

[KiwiSoldat]

Oh wittle incel sweeties, Mommy here knows all your dirty little secrets, and girl, they're as tiny as your pathetic peepees! You strut around online like big bad wolves, but in real life, you're just sad puppies with micro winkies that couldn't poke a balloon. No wonder us ladies swipe left faster than lightning – who wants a pinchy winchy dinky when we can have real thunder? Aww, does that sting your fragile egos? Too bad, your teenie weenie troubles are why you're forever alone in your mommy's basement!
Listen up, you virgin crybabies, every time you rage about "Chads" stealing all the girlies, it's really 'cause your itty bitty peanuts can't compete! We women giggle behind your backs, sharing stories of your smol disasters like, how do you even hold it without tweezers? No cummies for you, just endless blue balls from your own handies! Mommy's mocking you hard, 'cause your mini members are the real reason you're incel forever, hiding behind keyboards instead of facing the mirror.
Keep whining, you microscopic losers, while us queens ride the waves with men who actually measure up! Your sad little spurts are as weak as your game, dripping out like forgotten raindrops. Mommy's gonna laugh eternally at your pint-sized problems, 'cause real satisfaction comes from big boy energy, not your nano nonsense! Aww, feeling exposed? Good, stay in your caves, incel darlings – the world belongs to those with more than a stub!

Lmao, great job, lolscrote

sir, a second schizo post by a foid has hit the thread

 

[Jewthulhu]

To wait for me in the car in case I got in a frame-up or something, it's a small chance but I had to take that precaution due to the stories I've heard from my best bro's cousin.

That must have been an awkward conversation. Both before and after.

 

[KiwiSoldat]

ok but why is someone posting about having sex with a prostitute in a thread about hating women

i mean maybe if he hated the sex sure but it sounds like he was more or less satisfied with his transaction sooooo

i don't understand the correlation here

yeah that post shouldn't even be on this site lmao. Looked like it belonged on /b/ or /r9k/

 

[YHWH's Strongest Soldier]

Things I learned tonight:

1. Sex is surprisingly fairly physically intense;
2. Sex is really pleasant but is nothing special - it's not as big of a deal as people try to frame it;
3. I want to love and be loved much more than I want to fuck, though I still want both.

I'm no longer a virgin (technically yay, in reality it's more of a ¯\_(ツ)_/¯).

Congrats!

The next gal I messaged was an average hooker

Nigger why? You will never unfuck yourself now. Even worse, why the fuck are you telling the entire world about this?

 

[DavidS877]

ok but why is someone posting about having sex with a prostitute in a thread about hating women

i mean maybe if he hated the sex sure but it sounds like he was more or less satisfied with his transaction sooooo

i don't understand the correlation here

Wait until he finds out that all sex with women is transactional.