💪 Tough Guys Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

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OtherLastTrainHome said:
probably the funniest fucking thing about that pic of Rick in the Garage bar is that the two people next to him have the lighting on them and he's just in the shadows on the fringe, an undesirable, an eyesore. he's a lump of clay on the side of the road. onaboard posters already pointed out he was prison'ing the stalkers while at this bar (it coincided with football, i believe) and talking shit about Charlie Kirk. i'm just saying, it's fucking perfect for him: a fat friendless fuck-up. God has the greatest sense of humor.

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Look at that subtle off-pink jowl. The tasteful thickness of his wattle. Oh my God, it even has a moob shadow!
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Tiny Tim Blows Goats in Space, written by a guy who is too retarded ever to have read even a single book by Dickens, will never be published.
 
AnOminous said:
Tiny Tim Blows Goats in Space, written by a guy who is too retarded ever to have read even a single book by Dickens, will never be published.
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It'll get sharted out just in time for Holiday Season 2026, he won't mention that it was released because he'll use a fly-by-night vanity publisher, and it won't be discovered until February by an enterprising funster who searches it on Amazon and finds it on page 2 of the results.
 
AnOminous said:
Tiny Tim Blows Goats in Space, written by a guy who is too retarded ever to have read even a single book by Dickens, will never be published.
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This is why your life is already over stalker. Books routinely go out on submission for an extended period of time. I’m sorry you’re so stupid.

I haven’t heard any updates from my agent in a year or so but I’m sure he’s just biding his time and working out another great deal. I’m sure he’ll call me back any day now. Yes, aaaaaany day now.
 
Ranine Avatar said:
Oh my God! Patrick installed the fence backward to put the rest of the world on the inside, in prison.
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Incredible deduction. It all makes so much more sense now.

NaggotFigger said:
how Rick really talks with normal people
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That's one of my all time favorites, especially ' you will go on report'. What does that even mean? On report to whom and for what? He's such a histrionic bitch.

YouTube Autist said:
BROKE
WOKE
YMUNKOKE
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Dammit, all this time I've been pronouncing it as yum-un- cokey.
 
AnOminous said:
Tiny Tim Blows Goats in Space, written by a guy who is too retarded ever to have read even a single book by Dickens, will never be published.
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That shit will be published instantly once someone wins the rights it in a lawsuit. (New fundraiser idea, Null can become a publishing house.)
Bill Evans 45 said:
That's one of my all time favorites, especially ' you will go on report'. What dies that even mean. On report to whom and for what? He's such a histrionic bitch.
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Ricky T is the epitome of "didn't peak in highschool but wishes he did" - he's also referred to peoples "permanent record". It's just him regurgitating mommytalk. He has no idea how the civil and criminal justice system, let alone the world operates outside of what he's seen on his shitty streaming services.
 
Reminder that for all our tomfoolery and shitposting, Pig Man is actually and genuinely and sincerely fucking retarded on an objective scale
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Allow me to Elucidate.
  1. Nigger kills himself in a college campus after bout of depression, and this conclusion is confirmed by the nigger sheriff and nigger coroner
  2. Predictable Tariq Nasneed tier grifters spend weeks chimping out about it being a RAYSSISSS LYNCHIN SHEEEEIT and that the nigger sheriff/nigger coroner are covering it up because "BLACK PEOPLE NEVER HANG THEMSELVES MAYYYNE!"
  3. Octoroon hasbeen Colin Kaepernick once again tries to revive his torched career by offering to pay for a "private autopsy" and there has been no update since
  4. Well known fraudster and BPD schizo Rebekah Jones randomly claims with zero source that the new autopsy happened and found he was 1000% super lynched because of Charlie Kirk, something local media categorically denies and notes the new autopsy has not yet even been confirmed to have happened, much less been released, and tracked this new claim to some groid grifter from the New Black Panther Party, a straight up ADL/SPLC accredited kangz hate group thats been infamous for decades for pushing the most abject and retarded dumb nigger conspiracies on the market to the point where even pozz liberal/leftist media and institutions stay clear of their schtick
  5. Infamously fat and gay and bitchtitted pig man uncritically swallows this chain of bullshit as objective fact and will now smugly oink at anyone and everyone who calls him out for being this fucking retarded, even when it inevitably gets re-refuted and the corpse picking grifters scurry away with their gibdats to a new con
 
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Judge Holden said:
Reminder that for all our tomfoolery and shitposting, Pig Man is actually and genuinely and sincerely fucking retarded on an objective scale
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For all the fun xitter pests get up to, it's a mystery why they haven't begun to community note him. It doesn't take too many reports for a note, and all Pat does it post low-hanging fruit like this.
 
Judge Holden said:
Oh he is fuckin angry oinkin here....
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"This is how you've chosen to conclude your life, in a cage"
To Fat's credit it looks like he's finally starting to master the English language, I remember when he first started using that phrase he would say WITH a cage rather than IN a cage, probably a Freudian slip as Slick Nick makes him wear a cuck cage as Congolid men flatulate into her vagina.
 
Divine right to rule said:
Too much effort, he prefers Nikki's strap-on doing the work for him.
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Big Nick's strap-on can no longer penetrate Pig Man's anus given how much fatter his ass has become. @Judge Holden knows how much fatter Patrick's ass is. The FBI knows he'll now never follow through on all his promises to fill the emptiness in Patrick's soul via his rectum (he was never going to anyways. British people are fucking liars).

Enjoy imagining the smell of these acts.
TurboNAS said:
I haven’t heard any updates from my agent in a year or so but I’m sure he’s just biding his time and working out another great deal. I’m sure he’ll call me back any day now. Yes, aaaaaany day now.
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Someone should suggest he get a second, better agent.
 
FinnSven said:
I think it’s several elements combined.

The fact he is a know it all despite being consistently proven wrong and stupid.

His total lack of humility.
The lack of humility further with his obstinate refusal to learn any lessons, and to keep blaming everyone else.
For instance he gets banned from Hoolies, because he created an embarrassing situation. Sure no one told that guy to drive all the way there and make a drama, but Patrick should have just ignored it.
He had gone home that night, so he could have just not acknowledged it and never engaged again.
Instead he gets the fucking courts involved.
One of the results is that hoolies appear to decide he is more trouble than he is worth so ban him.
Rather than then thinking maybe publicly drinking in faux dives is unnecessary and generates pointless hassle, he finds other bars to continue his cycle. He now even has increased the possibility of someone coming to wind him up as there is probably another pest or two who would love to make him look like a dick in court.

And of course, according to him, he is in the right and the stalker children are wrong and somehow managed to manipulate the judge.
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Little late, but I genuinely believe Pat is the platonic ideal of a lolcow. He's just contemptible enough that it's really difficult to feel sympathetic for him, without ever fully crossing over into true horrorcow status, where the righteous anger overtakes the inherent humor of a situation. Attempts at trolling him are also so mild (aside from SWATting, which is all but guaranteed to not be from his trolls) that they don't tip this fragile balance like bluespike did back in the day. While he is politically slacktive, it's not the main draw, so you don't really get things like hollywood hulk loitering in the Jack Scalfani thread, seemingly under the impression that the entire draw to the humor is "lol, he republican!". And the biggest thing is that you just really never know what the hell is gonna happen next. Sure, it'll involve our porcine corpulence being fat and retarded, but you could wake up one day and he's suing a city for not giving him special treatment, or he put out a video of his own faucet-shaped micropenis, or he just faked a paint-based hatecrime against his own driveway. His "slow" periods are more active than the peaks of 90% of cows on the site, and in a genuine drought, there's such a huge back catalog that there's bound to be something entirely novel that has never happened to any other person on this green and blue space marble that you can find and laugh at.
 
Markorian said:
And the biggest thing is that you just really never know what the hell is gonna happen next. Sure, it'll involve our porcine corpulence being fat and retarded, but you could wake up one day and he's suing a city for not giving him special treatment, or he put out a video of his own faucet-shaped micropenis, or he just faked a paint-based hatecrime against his own driveway. His "slow" periods are more active than the peaks of 90% of cows on the site, and in a genuine drought, there's such a huge back catalog that there's bound to be something entirely novel that has never happened to any other person on this green and blue space marble that you can find and laugh at.
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Just wait until his next novel gets published and someone combs through it to find all the funny parts. Having those parts tweeted at him and watching him oink should produce some solid laughs
 
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