- Joined
- Jun 2, 2024
A tranny's sister and her husband are determined to keep him away from their young children, which at first was a boundary he was willing to respect - but now that it's been too long for his liking, he's preparing to put his foot down and insist upon access to them. Highlights of this one include his mother confronting the sister to pressure her to permit access and his own scheming to bring 'toys and treats' for the kids, who are only 4 and 6 years old, because he was simply that ecstatic to meet them as his 'true self.' Very creepy!
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the dark arts radfem ideology and it's putting a strain on their already tenuous relationship; 'self preservation' and 'supporting [our] trans sisters' is of utmost importance to OP, but apparently it's not important enough for her to find the courage to have an adult conversation with said friend. Does testosterone have a uniquely spine-melting quality to it when women are supercharged with it? Because I noticed TiFs tend to be the most cowardly of all the lions.
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Second verse, same as the first: yet another troon wants access to his sibling's children and finds himself roadblocked when the wee babe's parents make it clear that their household is a crossdresser-free zone. Has anyone noticed an uptick in troons complaining about how their families are keeping them away from their kids? I love this song!Brother-in-law and sister won't let me meet by niece and nephew; what do I do?
Hello all. I don’t really know how to word this, as it’s a pretty touchy topic for me and I get all frazzled even just thinking about it. I’ll try to keep things real but factual, I guess.
Long story short, I came out in December 2024 and started transitioning around the new year. I have been transitioning for 9 months now and in every way I can I’ve been openly living as my true self: name, pronouns, documents, clothing, speech, makeup, etc. So far everyone in both sides of my family knows about me and most have already seen me in transition, except for my brother-in-law.
Around the one- or two-month mark, my sister let me know that while she is 100% supportive (she always has been) and while her husband supports me on a personal level, he did not want me to meet the kids due to wanting to protect them. I had spent the last decade being married to a conservative Christian so I am familiar with this sort of position; it’s fucked but whatever. So I was initially patient and I told my sister I understood it’s a big change and I respected her marriage, and would be here when everyone’s ready.
Two months go by without a word. Meanwhile, Mom had a birthday dinner for my grandmother that I had to bust my butt to leave by 6:00 PM so that my sister, brother-in-law, and their kids could come over to celebrate without running into me. This hurt a lot and after talking to my friends I decided that I would communicate to my Mom that I would not be leaving early again to appease somebody, and when I talked with Mom about it she agreed 100% and said that she expects my brother-in-law to get it together. I communicated how hurt I was feeling to Mom and she apparently confronted my sister and said that something has to change.
A few days after Mom talked with my sister, sis let me know that she and her husband talked and they agreed it was OK for me to meet the kids. I was ecstatic; planned how I was gonna show up, what toys and treats I’d bring (my niece is 4 and my nephew is 6), told all my friends and family how jazzed I was to finally be getting to meet my niece/nephew as my true self, etc. But then after a week I still didn’t receive updates and learned that, apparently, my brother-in-law got drunk, said some transphobic shit, he and my sister got into a fight…then the plan once again fell right off the table.
It’s been 6 months now and I haven’t gotten any updates. My sister, like me, is a therapist and is very busy. She has a very hard time responding to my texts and it just seems like my she isn’t very available for a talk. At this point, I’m incredibly hurt and frustrated. I keep trying to put things into perspective and be understanding but I’m at my wit’s end…I’m not a freak, and my brother-in-law is the only one having a big problem. I really don’t know what there is to protect the kids from (I’m not gonna wiggle my fingers and turn them queer) and based on my sister uploading pictures of several vacations over the summer, not broaching the topic when we hang out, and just receiving no updates at all, I’m starting to believe that this matter isn’t that important to her.
I get it. Sis has kids, a marriage, a fulltime job, parenting activities, hobbies, etc. But I’m also insanely busy. I work full time, I volunteer, I’m in school, I’m navigating transition and using what little free time I have to go to appointments and run errands. Every time someone rationalizes this talk being pushed off as “people just being busy” I want to scream and say, “we’re *all* fucking busy right now! This has taken almost 9 months! This is ridiculous!”
If this was something that I knew was a difficult matter for them and that they are trying to work it out but can’t, I could deal with that. I mean, that could still be the case, but it really just feels like this matter fell to the wayside. I love my sister; growing up while Mom was working her shit out and the household was falling apart, she and I were like glue. For the first time in my life I’m genuinely happy, and I want to be able to go to all the family things and see everyone again. I’m not a criminal or delinquent; I’m a trans girl, and I work very hard in life. I’m not trying to sound selfish but I feel like I deserve a little more respect.
Was hoping for feedback and ideas about how to proceed. I’m thinking of the good old fashioned direct talk with sis, saying it *needs* to happen at some point. But I’m also always looking for all sorts of ideas on these things. Thankies!
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Ballbuster: a TiF is assigned to room with another TiF, and as is expected between two NLOGs, the cattiness starts flying - right up until her roommate mocks her for packing and pokes fun at her lack of testicles. Because she's a woman masquerading as a man, of course she needs emotional support in this trying time.Trigger warning a lot of transphobia.
I've been feeling pretty shit for a bit now, my brother is having a baby and he is being transphobic towards me, we arnt really talking much but he said to my mom that trans people are pedofiles and he keeps looking at me whit disgust on his face.And everyone is doing that now, I can't walk outside whitout someone looking at me and wrinkling their nose or widening their eyes or even fucking going to the other side of the road.
And I look like a pedofile, fucking receeding hairline and all then I put on fucking makeup and lipstick and think wow I look so pretty while in reality everyone sees a disgusting pervert.
And on top of all that not only will I be soon called an uncle but that fucking asshole gets to have a baby the way he wanted to but I can't.
And I don't want to be perceived as a pervert or a freak or a monster I'm just a girl.
It's death over detransition but idk If this is much better.
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A pooner's pal has started dabbling inMy roommate outed me
I’m a freshman in uni, and I’m in gender inclusive housing and got put with another trans guy. It all seemed good, but since meeting him (even though he is genuinely nice) theres some snarky comments and jealousy rooted in my passing. He’s been post top, and been on T longer than me, and doesn’t pass as well. I’ve gone stealth since getting here and honestly never felt better about myself and my situation, but last night me and my friend from the hall (who is trans, but doesn’t know I am), figured we would invite him to go wandering with us because he’s having a hard time making friends. He’s enjoyable to be around, and generally respectful, so we figured it would be great. About half way through they were talking about pants not fitting right, and wanted pants like mine, and somehow we got on the topic of underwear and then gym shorts. My roommate doesn’t pack (from what I can tell), but it’s kind of my holy grail, and I made a comment along the lines of “idk I feel like theres shorts that accentuate my balls a lot more than any boxers I own” and without pause he said “what balls” and started laughing. Obviously it was a joke, but I made it clear earlier that I wanted to be as stealth as possible directly prior to this as well. He said he’d respect that and acted like it was obviously my choice and that I didn’t even need to say anything.
I just kinda feel like I’m trying to be nice to the guy, and among other things, now he outed me after I made it clear to him not too, and I feel like he’s constantly jealous of my and tries picking me apart.
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Childlike blunder: the curious 9-year-old sister of a TiF's fiancee turns to her mother to ask why OP has breasts, and the mother states honestly that OP is transgender. The little girl doesn't press the topic too deeply, but it's still too deeply pressed for the TiF's comfort, though she can't pinpoint precisely why she's uncomfortable about a child seeing through her deception.long time friend is getting involved with radfem spaces and i’m worried
she doesn’t seem like she identifies as a radfem as of right now and she’s always been very trans supportive and i also am supportive of feminist ideologies/movements themselves but there’s unfortunately a lot of anti transgender rhetoric in this space and i’ve seen people she follows in said spaces that are transphobicwe’ve been very distant as of recently both because she’s busy with things and she’s distanced herself in ways that make me feel like she doesn’t really want to talk to me or at least have an open line of communication so it’s easy for me to overthink things even though i want to have faith in her and know overthinking won’t do me any good in the first place anyways. i just feel really uncomfortable with her interacting with transphobic people in the same way anyone would feel uncomfortable if their friend was in a space with people who don’t like you at all and i feel like it’s hard for non trans people especially to get it. self preservation especially in these times and also supporting our trans sisters is important to me so i really just don’t even want to engage with anyone who has those views. i really don’t want to lose this friend so i’m honestly just really sad and worried and needed to let it out somewhere
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At a local diner, a li'l dood lets a waitress know about her preferred pronouns (because that is somehow fucking relevant when you go to restaurants for some reason?), only for this to blow up in her face when the waitress makes a big deal out of using the wrong ones upon seeing her painted nails. Though the waitress was properly apologetic and simpering, she still feels anxious about the interaction and is already planning a confrontation upon her next visit, because nothing is ever enough for these fucking people.My fiancée’s little sister realized I’m trans and idk how I feel about it
My fiancée and I started dating almost 5 years ago and got engaged 2 years ago. Their little sister is currently 9. I was introduced to her as Ryan he/him when we met five years ago, so she’s never known any different.
I’ve been unable to afford any kind of medical transition, so I’m just working with what I’ve got. My fiancée told me yesterday about this that their mom had told them.
Their little sister had gone to their mom kind of concerned saying she noticed while we were swimming that I had boobs, and asked if it was a medical condition or something and if I was okay.
Their mom said that it was because I was transgender, little sister she said she didn’t really know what that meant. Mom explained I was born female, but I’m a boy now, and that’s why I have boobs.
Little sister asked “so he doesn’t have a penis?” Mom said “no, he doesn’t”. Little sister says “but he’s still a boy?” Mom said “yes, he’s a boy”. Little sister says “I don’t understand”. Mom says “We don’t have to understand, but we’re going to love and respect him anyway”.
Little sister asks “has he always been Ryan?”. Mom says “no, but his old name is a dead name, we’re gonna keep that name dead.” Little sister says “okay!” And goes about her day.
I don’t necessarily think the conversation was handled poorly, but it’s making me uncomfortable. I don’t know if it was just because I was kind of outed or what about it necessarily, but I’m just feeling kind of icky about it. I can’t really pinpoint what exactly is making me so uncomfortable.
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Price of admission: when her family offers her a roof over her head in exchange for having her hormones monitored, a TiF is caught between a rock and a hard place trying to decide between her desire to poon out and her desire to pursue an education. Personally, I find this creepy for parents to do especially towards adult children, but the fact that the answer to this isn't a no-brainer for OP is seriously puzzling. You'd really prefer being on steroids to having a fucking degree?Am I overreacting about the nail polish comment from a waitress?
If you wanna TLDR this, then skip to the main question, which will be in bold letters. The rest is background information for more context.
I have been going to this diner in my city since February of this year. I like them because they donate money to local LGBT+ organizations and are a local business with just three locations.
I had admitted he/him and sir were preferred to my usual waitress in early July. She is a cis het lesbian, so I felt a little more comfortable asking her to accommodate. I hadn't returned since then until the 19th of August, so I expected her to forget.
We, myself, my spouse, the waitress, and a cis gay couple at the next table were having a conversation about peppers, and the waitress slipped and called me she. I just said, "Oh, he." She stopped and went, "OMG SO SORRY HE! HE! DEFINITELY HE!" And I was suddenly like, "Can we talk about peppers now?" Because it felt awkward suddenly.
A bit later she came by and was like, "I have to admit, I only did it because your nails were painted." I stroked my stubbled chin and just said, "My kids wanted to paint nails, and Partner is a cook so he can't have colored nails."
I thought about it a lot and was thinking that when cis men wear polish it isn't typically immediately getting them called she/her. I also know I have long hair though.
Am I overreacting by feeling like next time I go I should tell her that when a trans person corrects the pronouns, no matter how GNC they are, it is polite to just repeat the proper pronoun and go back to the regular conversation?
I already knew my nails being red could possibly cause some sort of issue with misgendering since I do have long hair and have had to stop wearing my binder over my D chest due to some pain and complications. I don't really need an ally to tell me what makes me not pass. I know I look really genderless right now.
I wanted to get back to talking about the food so bad that it was making me extremely anxious. Calling attention to my transness in a red state, even in an accepting environment, makes my skin crawl after a certain point. I wear a small he/him badge so tiny most people miss it and that's about it. The rest of my attire is typically masculine or a combination of masculine clothes with androgynous jewelry. My goal is to mostly blend in as cis, or in the very least garner very little attention due to my fears of hostility.
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Clot twist: a tranny is hospitalized with multiple clots in his lungs, resulting in his providers ordering him to cease any and all attempts at HRT immediately to save his life - and this was after only a year and a half of abusing them. His only recourse to become a proper lady now is to get the cock chop, but he worries that Alberta - his home province - may crack down on genital butchery any day now, so it's become a race between him and every transphobic grain of sand that passes through the hourglass.Family making me take monthly hormone tests or get cut off.
I’m a little over a year on T. Three months ago I got kicked out of my house and my parents saddled me with $40k of debt for my schooling bill and stopped sending me to school because I’m trans.
They are willing to let me go back and come back to live with them if I agree to monthly hormone tests for “until further notice”.
I’ve stopped T for them before when I got paranoid (was doing it in secret, obviously), this led to horrible a mental health space, extreme dysphoria, and overall deep unhappiness.
I’m so happy with feeling at home with my body finally. I have a wonderful relationship where I’m actually comfortable with myself, and I am extremely satisfied with how I interact and am perceived in the world as who I am.
I really want to go back to school— I was thriving, but this is mainly because I was able to be myself. Stopping T and doing these tests is so scary because I feel like I’m sacrificing my entire being to do this, and there’s no telling my parents’ relationship will improve, especially if I’m so unhappy. I’m scared that going off T will destroy my relationship because of my dysphoria and mental health.
I might agree to going off for a little bit to get back home but I can’t imagine doing this for years when I’ve already gotten a taste of what it’s like to be myself this past year. I’m just really at a loss of what to do or how to compromise with them without sacrificing my wellbeing.
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Just got terrible news
Recently hospitalized and diagnosed with multiple clots in my lungs. I have to stop all HRT. I am devastated.
I was on hormones for a year and a half and was starting to see some real change both physically and emotionally.
One of the main ways of feminizing myself has been cut out from underneath me. I was just starting to see the woman within me.
I admit that my first instinct was to harm myself but I have strong support from my family and they are helping me through this.
I’m having a hard time describing my conflicting and constantly changing emotions. I’m terrified. I’m crying all the time. Even with a social transition I think I’ll look like a man in drag.
I’m Canadian and do have the option of surgically transitioning with the government support but will have to go through psychiatrists and endocrinologists, two of each must approve then convince the government that I’m a viable candidate for surgery. I’ve been on the waiting list for the Gender Program which should help me through the process, hopefully.
I live in Alberta, a deeply and radically conservative province and am terrified by their hatred of all things LGBT+. This conservative government could pull its financial support for the gender program at any time, leaving many trans people stranded and more isolated. That was why I had my gender markers officially changed on my documents early before the province decided to no longer allow it.
I’m venting and just wanted to get this out to people who understand. Thanks for listening.