Mass Effect Andromeda: Shitstorm Edition - RIP Biowear

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So the facefucking alien squids at EA have decided it's time to go full hentai on the idiots at the ME SJW team.

They don't like it when your bullshit costs them money.
realizing direct intervention was necessary, they assumed control of ME:A's form but they've merely delayed the inevitable. they might be hoping to preserve bioware's corpse if possible but they are shortsighted and this delay is pointless.
 
They'll probably just change it to make it more tumblr-friendly, since people have been complaining about the character "deadnaming" herself.

It'd probably be more realistic if when Hainly mentions she wrote a lot of papers, that Ryder said something along the lines of 'Nah it was some dude called Stephen', then Hainly just said 'old me' and moved on.
 
Okey I have given this trainwreck a little playing.

Even if you make a custom Ryder, the female one will have googly eyes even if you manage to , after half an hour of work, get together a face that can be called "average" and not "she-fiend of the haunted mines" , but the googly eyes are horribly disturbing.

A point nobody touched, is the shading. It turns your face into a mass of wrinkles if you stand at the wrong angle, making the character look like a grandparent.

And yeah, no whitey allowed unless you go for autistic waifu. Also, the puns. Everybody is throwing puns like they are on 4chan or some college stand up comedy act and not in deadly peril.
 
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Neir Automata is going to outsell Andromeda and it is beautiful, because its main character is 'problematic'. The only good thing about Andromeda is that I've discovered some really cool mods for ME:3 that just might redeem that train-wreck. But at the same time it is bittersweet, there was just so much potential in this universe and it was just tossed away by idiots and fucktards up their own ass.

Not to mention this:


I know this has been rumored before, but it goes into a little more in-depth as to why. Basically what they did was use a tech called cyberscan, which scans objects/faces and imports them so that modelers have a place to start from. The tech isn't good enough to be used by itself, it has to be complemented by animators/modlers. Its just so that you have a template to start from and don't need to start from scratch. Apparently, upper management prevented Bioware from even touching these things and just used the raw cyberscan input. This was because the human characters were outsourced, they didn't want to spend the time/money on it obviously. The only thing Bioware was allowed to handle model-wise were hard surfaces, ships, bots and some aliens.

They outsourced it to Bucharest, Romania. The funny thing is that it wasn't done for cost reasons, the stupid fucking morons thought there was no need to polish assets and animations. I don't even blame the guys in Bucharest, because they were probably told to not touch up the cyberscans, just make it workable. For reasons that are obvious. And then, of course, there is the source who said that there were people in Bioware who didn't want to touch up the faces because, surprise surprise, they didn't want to make female characters 'unrealistic' or 'attractive'. Somehow attractive people are 'unrealistic' somehow. Don't ask me how that is logical. So instead, they look like man-things with no human emotion and retarded. Yeah. And this wasn't even the Bioware core team, this was fucking management. Apparently animators begged the management to make them touch up the faces, but were rejected.

So yup, it was upper management fucking over the entire game. Good job, EA. Good fucking job.
 
So, this hasn't been mentioned yet, but do any other brits find the english accents extremely grating in this game? Maybe it's just bad acting or me being brummy and not used to posh voices, but fuck me those are annoying.
 
So, this hasn't been mentioned yet, but do any other brits find the english accents extremely grating in this game? Maybe it's just bad acting or me being brummy and not used to posh voices, but fuck me those are annoying.
melting black butch dyke (from the cutscene with the skilled cheerful disarming) has the best accent
 
So, this hasn't been mentioned yet, but do any other brits find the english accents extremely grating in this game? Maybe it's just bad acting or me being brummy and not used to posh voices, but fuck me those are annoying.
One or two of them are very RP in tone, yes, but theres at least two London accents in there. Mainly just the standard home counties bias I casting, realistically.

Can you honestly imagine having to deal with a yamyam accent after waking up from a 6 century cryosleep, though? I'd just demand that the fuckers put me straight back into stasis for at least another century.
 
http://sneed.storage.akamai.coub.com/get/b100/p/coub/simple/cw_timeline_pic/2743ab4c3a4/cd99d7c4aef5b6a14e3bc/big_1472482705_image.jpg

This is what a Romanian artist came up for his 40k movie project. Eastern European personnel are not necessary untalented just because they get paid less.

Also, damn... the only good thing so far in ME:A is the super pretty backgrounds. They are indeed prettylicious. Too bad it is not ME: Scenery Sightseeing.
 
http://sneed.storage.akamai.coub.com/get/b100/p/coub/simple/cw_timeline_pic/2743ab4c3a4/cd99d7c4aef5b6a14e3bc/big_1472482705_image.jpg

This is what a Romanian artist came up for his 40k movie project. Eastern European personnel are not necessary untalented just because they get paid less.

Also, damn... the only good thing so far in ME:A is the super pretty backgrounds. They are indeed prettylicious. Too bad it is not ME: Scenery Sightseeing.
The guy behind the Lord Inquistor also has something that bioware lack: passion for his work. He is doing his short film for free.
 
Another little tidbit. Those helmets? No peripheral vision. Even the most pauldroned of space marines sees better to the side.

Also, the shading/Filters is terrible in game. Everything seems oddly lighted. Faces have shadows they shouldn't, and objects miss them.

Making an even "mediocre looking" character is a pain in the ass and you can't edit eye size. After an hour I managed to make an asian girl with normal eye size. Banzai.
 
I genuinely want people to buy this game so they don't learn from their mistakes and their next game will be a hilarious train wreck too.
Expecting anything resembling quality at this point is just stupid optimism. Punishing them is just going to lead to another unplayable, barely funny piece of shit like Inquisition.
 
So, this hasn't been mentioned yet, but do any other brits find the english accents extremely grating in this game? Maybe it's just bad acting or me being brummy and not used to posh voices, but fuck me those are annoying.

Yeah, but that's only because it's standard shit. International companies need to get the fuck out of London for their British characters. A Glaswegian space cowboy or a scientist from Sheffield or some shit would be cool rather than yet another cockney rogue.
 
Oh boy, the menu is a horror show. It is not only the most unwieldy, sprawling, labyrinthine, byzantine shit I have ever seen, but it is so counter intuitive. I still don't know how to fucking change the weapons on my character. The reviews do not do it justice in just hard it is to use. It is not just laborous, but actually hard.

The walk bug is fixed, but everything else is still in. Clipping, Captain Pingu, The my face is tired autist, hell they even managed to fuck up Turian faces, since eyes and eyelids now clip with every blink half the time.

It is like they just went. "GW never proofreads their codexes, so we should not playtest our game either, since GW is the smartest when it comes to customer handling. Lets mix it with Disney PC bollocks for extra fun!"

The kett look like someone made a gangbang of Quanari and Collectors. They are so generic and familiar, it feels like I already beat them in another game. Oh, I did, in Me2. I think they tried to go with the fallen angel theme, as the bone growth of their boss looks like a halo from behind, and looks like curving horns from the front, but I'm propably giving them too much credit.

It is at once hilarious and sad. There was a lot, a lot of promise with this game, all down the gutter. The idea was great. The execution was very unprofessional.

This is not a horrible game. It is a very mediocre one, something you would expect from a new company's first title that has been just formed by indie developers as their first big step into the corporate world. If you compare it to all the games recently made for computers, indie and professional, it comes off as a 5/10. In a sense this is true, as this is a new studio made up by sjw hires who had little to no experience.

But this was supposed to be an AAA game that follows 3 very high quality games (ME3 ending writing derp excluded) and it falls abysmally short. This game feels like a sequel fan fic that some amateur modders who have no game industry education managed to slap together. When compared to the other ME games, it is at best 3/10.

The promise shines through, the nostalgia tries to warm you, than you keep getting hit in the face by the turds that are bugs, glitches, abysmal writing, voice acting and facial animations.

If this was an indie first big game for 30 bucks, I would say good on them. Afraid its not.
 
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